ATTENTION: Before you read this and hate me for it, I have nothing against homosexual people, in case you mistakenly interpret that idea as you read this. This story was removed before for being in the wrong format, butI edited it and re-submitted this story, in case you've seen this here before. So enjoy the humorousness of random events that occur in this story. Review please : .
"IT"S WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONARE! WITH OUR HOST, REEGIS FILLMORE! (or whatever his name is... he's not important to society. But for the protection of his own sake, I'll add another E to his name.)"
"Hello everybody! And welcome to WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONARE! Today's contestant is... (cheap drumroll) ...MONKEY D. LUFFY!"
"MEEEEEEEEEE? WHEEEEEEEEE!" Luffy hops onto the seat thingy in front of Reegis.
"Tell me Luffy, do YOU want to be a millionare?" Reegis asks Luffy.
"You betcha-wetcha I would!"
"And what do you plan to do with that kind of money, being a millionare and all?"
Luffy thinks hard, "uuuuuuh... drools urrrrrrmmmm..."
"...anything. Do you want anything you can buy with a million dollars?" Reegis grew a little impatient.
"Dollars? What's a dollars?"
"...hehe, crayons..." Luffy randomly states.
"...Never mind, let's get to playing... WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONARE! WHOOOOOOOOO!" Reegis cheers.
"BOO! YOU SUCK REGIS!" Usopp, who is already in the audience, shouts. Reegis simply stares at Usopp.
Usopp stares back, "...hello."
"Oh-kay, uhhh, now, the question starting with 100 dollars, and all three of your life lines unused, we'll start that game!"
Luffy replies, "'Kay"
Reegis reads the question aloud, "Now in which of the following countries would you most likely find a ski resort? Is it (A), Kenya, (B), Spain, (C) Chili, or (D), Canada?"
Luffy thinks incredilbly hard. "uhhhhh...(drools)...uuuuuurrrrmmmm..." Luffy thinks: "Darn, I dont know a thing about these countries, better use a lifeline."
"Did you make up your mind yet?" Reegis asks Luffy.
"I would like to use a lifeline, please!" Luffy declares.
"Very well, which one would you like to use? You can use the 50/50 option, call a friend, or ask the audience?"
"Uhhh... I wanna call a friend!"
"Well, here's the phone." Reegis hands Luffy a phone.
"'Kay thanks..." Luffystarts todial a number. Seconds later, Reegis' cellphone starts to ring an aggrivating tone.
Reegis picks up his cell phone. "Hello?"
Luffy speaks through the telephone. "Hi Reegis, what's the answer to the question you asked me?"
"Luffy, you can't call me." Reegis said.
"Why not? I just called you."
"Because I'm the host of this show, now go call your friend or someone."Irritated, he turns off his cellphone...(LE GASP).
"Okay..." Frowning, Luffy dials another number. The ringing on the other line was heard.
"Thank you for calling Pizza Hut! May I take your order?" A Pizza Hut employee answered.
"Yeah, Hi, can I order 5 Large pepperoni and saussage pizzas? And maybe some-"
"Luffy, you can't order pizza using your lifeline." Reegis interrupts.
"Why not?" Luffy asks
"Because it has nothing to do with the game."
"Well too bad, it's already on it's way."
Reegis looks really dissapointed.
"Well, can I use another lifeline? I still don't know the answer to the skiing question." Luffy states.
"Err... very well then. Which one would you like to use?" Reegis asks.
"Well, my friends are in the audience, so I'll ask the audience on this 'un!" Luffy declares.
"Okay, now audience, you submit your vote through the answer keys on your armrests to the left of you. The highest votes will determine which answer Luffy will most likely to choose. Go ahead and vote now."
The audience submits thier answers.
"Okay, looks like the votes are in. Now what did the audience think on this question?" Reegis says.
A big ass screen comes out of nowhere with results listed on the screen.
Luffy, who seems to be impressedby the screen, shouts, "COOOOOOOOL!"
"Err... there's only 6 of votes? Ahem, It looks like we have a small audience this evening! We have... 6 attendants! Since we don't have that many people here viewing this cheap-ass lameish low-budget show, we'll see them personally!" Reegis walks over to the 6 people who are conveniently sitting together. "Ah, It looks like Luffy's crew!"
"Wow! What a crusty human!" Chopper shouts.
"Sssshhh! It's not a 'human', it's a 'thing'" Usopp corrected Chopper.
"Oooooooohhhh... " Chopper looks down dissapointedly.
Zoro glares at Reegis, "What the hell do you want?"
"We'll since we have a small audience today, I decided to just see you all personally."
"I hate your clothes." Sanji comments.
"They look feminine on you, thing." Nami, includes.
"Hahahahaha..." Reegis began to feel aggrivated. "So what did you guys vote on?"
Zoro, "D."
Nami, "D."
Usopp, "C."
Sanji."A."
Chopper,"B."
Robin, "D."
Reegis has a distorted look on his face. "Errr... okay. Uh... the majority of the people here said... uhh...-"
"Is something wrong?" Robin asks.
"Yeah, why are you so hesitant?" Sanji questioned.
"Its... kinda queer." Says Nami.
"He's Gay! He's Gay!" Usopp shouts.
Chopper was only confuzzled.
"I knew it... the clothes, the hair, it all adds up..." Zoro said as he furrowed his brow.
"NOOO! I'm not gaaaaaaaaaay!" Reegis cries.
"DUUUUUUDE you said that in a Gay-ish tone..," Said Nami.
"It's no wonder no one attends this show..." Robin included.
Reegis shakes his head violently. "No! It's nothing like that!"
"Oohh man, maybe he came over here because the majority of us are men, and he wants to come inside one of us!" Usopp panicked.
Sanji shouted, "He wants Zoro! I can tell!"
"Discusting! How can you say such a thing?" Zoro glares at Sanji.
"He's attracted to your tight white shirt! You can see the lust in his eyes!" Sanji yelled.
Chopper was still confused. "Huh?"
"EVERYONE! RUUUUUUN AWAAAAAAAAAY UNLESS YOU WANT TO LOSE YOUR VIRGINITY!" Nami screamed as she ran for the exit.
"Hey! Don't judge him because he's gay, you bastards..." Robin said, with an annoyed look on her face.
Everyone except for Reegis and Luffy ran out of the building.
"Arrrrrruuuuuugggggghhhhhh..." Reegis was getting a migraine from all the commotion so he rubs sides of his forehead like irritated people do.
"Okay! I think I made up my mind!" Luffy shouted happily.
"FINALLY!"
"It's D!" Luffy squealed with exitement.
"Is that your final answer?" Reegis asks Luffy.
"No, wait, I think it's B."
"So is that your fina-"
"No wait, it is D."
"So is that your-"
"A!"
"So is tha-"
"IT'S C!"
"MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MIND ALREADY!" Reegis screamed.
"OOOOOOOH! The Pizza's here!" Luffy announced.
Pizza hut employee handed Luffy the Pizza. "That'll be $21.00 please!"
"Do you take credit?"
"AUUUUURRRRRGGGHHH! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! EVERYONE IS TOO STUPID!" Reegis screams so much that a gigantic vein pops up in his forehead.
"What's wrong? Did I win my million dollars?" Luffy said, looking confused.
A wall explodes in the background, revealing Luffy's crew after the dust and debris clear from the destruction.
"LUFFY!" Zoro called.
"WE CAME TO SAVE YOU AND THAT RANDOM PIZZA HUT EMPLOYEE FROM THAT GAY GUY!" Sanji yelled.
Luffy replies."OOOOOOOOOOhhhhhhhh!"
"I'M NOT GAY DAMMIT!" Reegis yells as the vein on his forehead grows bigger, quite menicingly red and huge-mungo.
"LIES! I KNEW IT ALL ALONG!" Usopp shouts as he shakes his finger at Reegis.
"I CAN'T TAKE ALL THIS MADNESS AND STUPIDITY! MY GOODNESS, WHAT ARE YOU GUYS, BRAINDEAD? YOU GUYS ARE TOO STUPID TO TELL THAT I'M NOT GAY, AND THIS STUPID SCAR-FACED BIZNATCH HAS'NT EVEN ANSWERED THE FIRST DAMNED QUESTION IN THIS DAMNED GAME! AAAAAARRRRRRRGGGHHHH!" Reegis screams.
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! Reegis has just exploded! Blood is everywhere!
"...What the hell just happened?" Nami asked as she stares at the bloody floor.
Chopper wiped the blood off his face. "I think Reegis 'sploded."
"I don't see him anywhere, I think he did explode from that huge-mungo vain protruding out of his forehead." Robin concludes.
"Ooooohhh..." Everybody says at the same time.
A long, awkward silence follows afterwards.
The Pizza Hut Delivery Man stands quietly. "...So, who wants to watch the Numa Numa dance?"