Ano…hi. This is my first time writing on so please don't slaughter me…this story takes place a bit before the whole SS arc…just something I wanted to try out. And I don't know how to do spacing well, so please bear with me...

Unohana Retsu, captain of the 4th division, walked peacefully to the 11thdivision, customary quiet smile in place. Inwardly however, she sighed.

There is something irritating, she mused, about having to go get a patient, instead of

having the patient simply come to me. Then again, this isn't your average patient…which

why I didn't just send someone to go get him…

Her smile widened. Zaraki Kenpachi was about to learn why no one liked to upset the 4th

division's captain.

Kusajika Yachiru was happily chasing a butterfly around (with perhaps some intent of ripping off its wings…) when a lady with a braid appeared.

"Ah, Kusajika-fukutaichou…would you mind getting Zaraki-taichou for me?" the lady (Yachiru couldn't remember her name right now) asked quietly.

"You want Ken-chan? Okay!" Yachiru chirped, "KEEEEEEENNNNNN-CHAAAAANNNN!"

The tall, scary (to anyone sane at least…) captain of the fierce 11th division appeared, looking annoyed. "What?"

Yachiru beamed, "The braid lady wants to talk to you!"

He turned to Unohana, "What?"

She bowed, "Zaraki-taichou, you have been busy perhaps, but you do need to attend annual checkups sometime."

He frowned, "Why should I have checkups? I'm perfectly healthy, just ask anyone!"

"Yep, Ken-chan is veeeeeeeerrrryyy healthy," Yachiru chimed in.

"It's for the record," Unohana explained, "in case you get injured, and we have to do a blood transfer or something."

"Che, I never get injured anymore anyway, there's no one strong enough here to injure me."

"All the same, I have to insist."

"And if I refuse?" he asked, smirking.

Unohana's normally placid smile suddenly turned a little creepy, "Then I suppose I'll have to force you."

Yachiru was amazed. The braid lady had quickly jabbed a few nerves on Ken-chan's neck, and paralyzed him. Then, she brought out some rope, tied him up, then dragged him away, with almost no effort.

"I'll return him in a little bit," she had called over her shoulder.

Wow, Yachiru thought, braid lady is strong! I hope Ken-chan has fun!

She then proceeded to chase the poor butterfly around again.

"Gah! What the hell?!" Kenpachi roared. To say the least, he was not in a comfortable position. One, he was tied up, two, Unohana was giving him shots, and three, this was an utter embarrassment. If his division found out that of all people, Unohana, the 4th division captain had beat him…well, he was doomed.

"You were right, Zaraki-taichou, you are very healthy," said Unohana, looking at the results.

"Then why the hell did you have to drag me here!"

"I said it before, for record reasons. At least right now we have your blood type, if we didn't and you needed a blood transfusion…well, the results would not be well."

"Why would I need a blood transfusion!"

"Since you get into so many fights, anything's possible."

"I always win!"

"There may be a time where you do not."

"Che, that would be okay for once…" he muttered.

"You wish to lose?"

"No, but it would mean that I had some fun for once."

She smiled, then murmured, "Just like a kid…"

He scowled, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Oh nothing…just a random thought…"

Gah, he thought, this woman annoys me! Always smiling, making weird comments…and managing to drag me here! GAAAAAAHHHH!

Unohana checked the last test results, (there were many tests, since Zaraki-taichou had never had a checkup in his life) then said, "Alright Zaraki-taichou, you may go now."

"And how am I supposed to do that!"

She looked up, then realized that he was still tied up with her extremely tight knots. "You could hop back…"

His expression of fury nearly sent her into gales of laughter, but she managed to restrain herself.

"…if you're in a hurry. Or I can just untie it"

She bent down, and undid the knots quickly and efficiently. Their proximity to eachothershe ignored.

"Goodbye Zaraki-taichou," she said gathering up the results, "and please don't forget to come again next year!"

He snarled, mentally cursing her, then walked back to the 11th division.

"Ken-chan!" Yachiru greeted him, happily holding onto a shredded flower, (she had given up on the butterfly awhile back) "Did you have fun?"

"Like hell!" he yelled.

"The braid lady was strong though," commented Yachiru, searching for more flowers, (to destroy) "Isn't that nice?"

"Huh?"

"Ken-chan and her can get along!"

"…whatever you say Yachiru. But let's keep this little…incident, a secret, okay?"

"Okay Ken-chan!" Yachiru said, holding up another flower.

I apologize for any OOCness in this fic…please review, and flames will be hurled right back. Constructive criticism (god I sound like an English teacher) is welcome though.