Chapter One: Live Again
I know what you go through From the nipple to the bottle, never satisfied I'm so sick and I'm so tired From the point when a child is torn from a mother's umbilical cord
From me to you, I love you
So the money got you doing shit that fuck up your pride
You ain't a hoe, you just really trying to get by
Every day looking up at the sky
Sometimes, shit get so hard
It really have you bothered
First you sigh, then you cry
Up a whole puddle of water
Seem like this shit won't ever end
Merry go rounds turn to whirlwinds
Waves turn to a hurricane
If you see joy, you got to see pain
Shit in the world ain't gonna ever change
Even when you die, it'll be the same
Now you'll give them a circumstance
Jobs ain't callin so you're forced to dance
Hoping and praying for a second chance
Just wanna put back on your pants
Walk out the club and throw up your hands
Tired of being disrespected by a man
Say this shit ain't right for you
Niggaz been yellin all night for you
Got ya in the mind what's best for you
Walk up to the club owner, tell 'em your through
She's stuck off in this little room
With nothing left to hold onto
Her life is in a little box
She's wondering will it ever stop?
The life of a stripper
Of these clubs, I keep crying
Every night, I wipe my eyes
Cause these years pass me by
I give up, I'm all in
My whole life is full of sin
This road is a dead end
I wanna live again
No one really enforces that life is gonna be hard
Which is kinda left up to the teachers
But the teachers leave it up to the preachers
The preachers ain't fillin' the bleachers
It's the rappers
Sad, ain't it
It was this girl next door, pretty fine little woman
Going to college, taking off her clothes for money
She gotta pay the rent, she got a little girl
Her baby daddy ain't shit,
See what she dealin with?
But she gotta hold on (hold on)
Wanna leave the club alone (it feels wrong)
She gotta pay the bills but in the meantime
She like "fuck how she feel" living is real
So she back in the club again
Taking off her clothes again
Going to school, going to work, getting tiring
Lack of sleep but baby gotta eat
And needs shoes on her feet
She got a test next week so she stressin'
Asking god to give her a blessing, send her in the right direction
Her parents died when she was eight years old
And after that, she felt like she was all alone
But she got her grandparents and they raised her well
Keep going to school, and take care of yourself
It's getting hard, going to school and work in the club
And at the same time looking for love
She can't keep strippin for an occupation
In a minute, she'll be graduating
Make her wanna throw up her hands
Cause she only wanna live again
She's stuck off in this little room
With nothing left to hold onto
Her life is in a little box
She's wondering will it ever stop?
The life of a stripper
I'm so sick and I'm so tired
Of these clubs, I keep crying
Every night, I wipe my eyes
Cause these years pass me by
I give up, I'm all in
My whole life is full of sin
This road is a dead end
I wanna live again
I danced to the music like I always did, slowly pulling my clothes off. I always took my sweet time, but apparently, the guys liked that about me. I had my back to this particular guy for the entire time so far, but he wasn't complaining. When I finally did turn around, I almost crapped myself.
"Craig?" I yelled in disbelief. I grabbed my clothes and ran from the room. I went to my dressing room and quickly got dressed in my plain khaki pants and a brown t-shirt.
"Mark, I'm going home!" I yelled to my boss behind the bar. I brought so much money to the club that I could come and go as I pleased. I also had a deal with the owner, my boss, Mark.
"See ya Sky!" he yelled back, using my stage name. It was the only name I had ever given him. I ran out to my black Honda Civic (it was all I could afford) and jumped in, throwing my bag on the seat next to me. It was there that I recalled the first time I came into this place, and the first time I met Mark. I had been able to lie low since then, but this was my first mistake. I never thought I'd see someone that I knew from DCS in that club.
-Flashback-
"Hey, I'm looking for a job," I said as I approached the first guy I saw. He had black hair that was spiked up and deep blue eyes. "Is there someone I could talk to?"
"Actually, that would be me. I'm Mark, the owner," the guy said, extending his hand for me to shake. He looked pretty young, probably around twenty-five. "If you want to be a stripper, you have to audition you know," he told me.
"I know." That's all I could think of to say. Mark looked me up and down a few times.
"Well, come on up to my apartment and you can get started." I followed him into a back room with stairs that led up to his apartment above the club. "Just pick a song," he said, waving a hand at his CD collection. I picked a hip-hop CD and put it into the stereo, switching it to a song with a good beat. He sat on hisbed while I did the dance I had practiced for a year, pulling off my clothes as I went. When I was finally finished, I received a round of applause from Mark.
"Does that mean I get the job?" I asked, pulling my shirt on.
"You're really good, don't get me wrong, but just how old are you?" he asked. I frowned; I was hoping not to be asked that question.
"Well…" I trailed off. "I'm seventeen. But I'll be eighteen soon!" I said, practically begging him.
"Why don't you find a waitressing job and come back in a couple of years," he suggested.
"I really need this job. I need the money, and I know this is the best way to make what I need. Please help me," I said. Now I really was begging.
"I don't know. Letting you work here would be putting my business on the line. If anyone found out, they'd probably tell the cops, and I'd get my club taken away. I can't jeopardize all of that just for you," Mark explained. I fought back my tears.
"I know I can make you a lot of money. And no one will find out, I promise," I said.
"To keep this secret for you, and to put myself in danger of losing my business, what are you going to give me in return?" he asked, a smile playing on his lips. He leaned back on his elbows and I instantly knew what he wanted. And I would do whatever I could to get this job. I just had to.
"I'll do anything," I said, trying my best to look sexy. I walked over to the bed, unzipping Mark's pants, and pulling them off. I went down on him; something I was pretty good at by then. When I was finished, he had a pretty satisfied look on his face. But he didn't say anything. He gave me a look, and I knew he wanted more. So I did the only thing I could. I climbed on top of him and had sex with him. When we were finished, Mark climbed off the bed and put his pants back on.
"You got the job," he said. He just walked away and left me there, lying in his bed. I felt so dirty and started to cry. A few minutes later, I sucked it up and forced myself to stop. I had to do this. I needed the money. I got dressed and ran down the stairs as fast as I could, passing Mark on my way out. "Get some rest, you start tomorrow night," he told me. I didn't acknowledge what he had said; I just had to get out of there.
-End of Flashback-
Pulling myself out of my little daydream (well, nightmare is a more fitting word) I turned they key in the ignition and made my way home. I found my mom waiting up for me at the kitchen table. She always waited up.
"How was work?" she asked. Of course she didn't know what I really did. She thought that I worked at some café inside a bookstore. My excuse for not telling her the name of the place was that I didn't want her to go there and embarrass me. She bought the story, and didn't ask me details. Little did she know that I worked at a strip club named Tric.
"Pretty good. I only made like a hundred in tips. Kinda slow night," I lied. Well, I wasn't lying about my tip amount. But I usually made around three hundred dollars in tips on a good night. I would have made more, but I only stayed at the club for about four hours. It was all I could afford to be away. "Where's Dad?" I asked her, trying to change the subject.
"He's already asleep. He tried to stay up to wish you well on your first day of school tomorrow, but he started falling asleep on the couch. He'll see you in the morning anyway."
"That was sweet of him. Well, where is she?" I asked my mom who knew very well who I was talking about.
"Sleeping. She had a rough night, but I'm not sure why. Very upset," she told me.
"Well, I better get to bed." I kissed my mom goodnight and went down to my room, careful not to wake her. I stripped down to my tank top and underwear, climbing into bed. I looked at the clock. It was 11:23. With any hope, I'd be able to sleep through the night until I had to get up at 6 am. It probably wouldn't happen though.
A/N: The song at the beginning is "Live Again" by the Ying Yang Twins and they own it. It's my inspiration for the whole fan fic. I got the club name 'Tric' from One Tree Hill, so I guess they own that. You should have been able to figure out who the main character is…I left like a few tiny hints. Read and review; I hope you like it!