The Psycho Ward: SSBM Style!
Part 1… AND A HALF! (ooh!)
Disclaimer: I don't own a lot of things… I don't even care… I will some day… but really if you steal from my ideas in this story… I WILL SUE YOU!… of course anything you stole from this story that isn't mine… well that will just get freaky…
Reviews:
WHY WONT YOU REVIEW MY CHAPTER 0!
Ok well either way I plan on this getting to 25 chapters… one for each character… the Smashers will be telling you stories of their life as if they are talking to a Psychiatrist or something like that… I guess… I should care shouldn't I?… oh well… the whole thing is one person talking
(Pikachu)
HEY YOU SON OF A BITCH!
WHY DO YOU PEOPLE ABUSE ME SO MUCH!
… there was a time… I had a lightning bolt strike me from above… as Zapdos was shocking me AND another Pikachu shocked me…
But NO! you all think… ooh look he's a cute rat… HE CANT BE HURT BY ELECTRICITY!
Oh you just don't KNOW!… oh I'll MAKE you know… I'll MAKE you realize how much it HURTS!
Ash is just sitting there laughing at me though…
"HAHA YOU CAN TAKE IT… BESIDES! THIS IS AN EXPERIMENT FOR SCIENCE!"
Ooh… IM NOT SCIENTIFIC… IM ALIVE!
But none of you realize that's the truth now do you…
You all just sit there laughing as I get slammed back and forth… "HAHA CUTE RAT IS DYING!"
Like this one time… this little kid started shoving PRETZELS up my ASS… I was like "DUDE WHAT THE CRUD ARE YOU DOING!" and all he said was "IM MAKING YOU MORE FLUFFY!"…
WHAT?
Why do you people INSIST on abusing poor little animals in the name of SCIENCE or… CUTENESS!…
I'm a real person too ya know… I like sex… BUT NO!
I cant do ANYTHING! ANYWHERE related to ANYTHING because its going to scare the kiddies…
THE STUPID KIDDIES ARE LAUGHING AT A RAT GETTING RANDOM OBJECTS INSERTED INTO HIM AND JOLTED WITH HIGH AMOUNTS OF ELECTRICITY!… THEY NEED MORE LOVE
Nope… no one will EVER get it though… I try to tell the doctor… but it turns out HALF OF THE STUFF HE DOES AT CHECK UPS ARE JUST THERE SO HE CAN STICK STUFF IN ME FOR FUN!
Would you like that?
I don't think you would…
And then there is the fact that I have to follow ASH around EVERYWHERE!
He thinks… "ooh I can read what Pikachu thinks… I know what he wants!"…
IM SICK OF BEING A PIKACHU!
I sit there begging for an upgrade and he cries and hugs me and acts all dramatic for the people around…
I beg for food and HE STOPS FOR THE NIGHT…
I ask him to let me go… AND HE HUGS ME!
That little fag better shut up and leave…
LIKE THE TIME HE THOUGHT I WAS ASKING HIM TO SHOVE FOOD DIRECTLY INTO MY STOMACH!
CRUD!… even the Pokecenter wasn't able to cure that without obsessive care and treatment… AND THEY GAVE ME BACK TO THE PRICK!
And then there are the times he throws me out into battles I NEVER AGREED TO!
I'm just sitting there MINDING MY OWN BUISINESS and suddenly POOF there pops out a LEVEL 80 CHARZARD…
And what does the prick do?
No he doesn't send any WATER pokemon out…
He doesn't even bother to send out any UPGRADED pokemon… I DOUBT HE HAS ANY!
Instead he just… THROWS ME AT IT… HOPING SOMETHING COOL AND PRETTY WILL HAPPEN!
But I usually fall over… almost die… AND HE JUST TAKES ME BACK TO THE POKECENTER!
He treats me like some kind of reusable condom…
AND THEN… there is this STUPID Smasher mansion…
KIRBY!… ARG! He swallows me SO MANY TIMES!
I'm SICK OF IT!
But since that's all Kirby does and he does that just randomly… lets talk about the FREAKS I have to put up with every day…
THERES JIGGLYPUFF!
Oh this freak wont stop SINGING!
It doesn't even put me to sleep… she just sits there… "OOH LOOK AT ME I CAN SING!"
Oh this freak needs to LEARN TO SHUT UP!
She talks all day and all night… the only reason she even has a chance during battles is because people get sick of her and KILL THEMSELVES!
My 'friends' tell me I'm acting too crazy…
YOU'D ACT CRAZY TOO IF YOU HAD KIDS DO VERY CREEPY 'EXPERIMENTS' ON YOU, ASH THROWING YOU AROUND LIKE A BITCH, AND SOME GIRL OBSESSED WITH YOU!
And Pichu… oh don't get me started on that suicidal, high pitched, stalking, RAPIST
He walks up to me all the time "DADDY LOOK AT ME".
FREAK! IM NOT IN ANY WAY RELATED TO YOU… WHY DO PEOPLE THINK WE ARE RELATED… "OOH THEY ARE BOTH THE SAME SPECIES!"
Would you say C. Falcon and Marth are related then… HUH?
"OOH BUT THEY ARE SOO CUTE!"
CUT THE CUTE CRAP OUT!
I am SO SICK of being classified as some freak with no brain and no life just because IM CUTE!
You would think this helps with the ladies but NO
They all think I'm some pure innocent MORON who CANT… ARG!
I FEEL SO ALONE IN THIS WORLD…
But oh well… then again
FRICKIN POKEBALLS!
Look… you cant have me just because you threw a red/white BALL AT ME!
Ok… one time this little FREAK ran up to me and threw a ball at me and laughed.
"YOU BELONG TO ME NOW" he shouted…
BUT I DON'T!
I just fried his brains out and left him for dead on the sidewalk…
BUT THEN 2 WEEKS LATER I GET A PHONE CALL FROM SOME FREAKY MOM WHO SAYS I AM THE SPAWN OF SATAN FOR DOING SUCH HORRORS TO HER SON…
WHAT!… YOUR SON JUST TRIED TO STEAL ME… SCREW YOUR SON…
But there was ALL KINDS of controversy… I was thrown away as being some freaky cute obsessed prick with no life… AND THEN THEY CALLED ME A NAZI!
WHY DO THESE PEOPLE THINK THEY CAN DO SUCH THINGS TO ME… I AM SICK OF BEING CONSIDERED PART OF THIS CROWED!
Why do I have so many groups thinking I suck so bad… THEY DON'T KNOW ME… WHENS THE LAST TIME YOU'VE MET SOMEONE WHO SPOKE PIKACHU… HUH?
MEWTWO IS THE ONLY ONE… AND HE JUST SUCKS SO THAT NEVER WORKS!
All I can say is screw you guys… I cant WAIT to get a hand on those nuclear weapons I ordered the other day…
And some day when you are all suppressed by the army of Pikachus… remember my words… and remember that cute things can STILL HAVE A LIFE!
YAY!
Well we are getting a feel of what life is like for the Smashers… and according to Pikachu… it sucks…
Maybe we can get some more positive outlooks from next times focus… FALCO!
So sit down… pretend you are somehow relaxed… and watch for more!
Did you like it… I did… this is fun to type… better than the old bore of SSBM ADVERTISEMENTS, or stupid SSBM GAME SHOWS…
Bleh… oh well…
R&R… Rest and Relaxation…