The Psychology of Getting Laid
Summary: Because everyone loves ensemble vacation fics!
Disclaimer: Don't own Boys Over Flowers/Hana Yori Dango. If I did, I would be holed up in my bedroom with Tsukasa and not sitting in front of a computer writing silly fanfics.
Author's Note: For anyone reading Legend, I haven't abandoned it. Comedy is really difficult for me to write, and my writing is out of practice in general. Since this fic is light-hearted but not strict comedy, I'm hoping it will ease me back into writing more easily than Legend was.
Chapter One: The F4 Improved My Pitching
"Oi! Makino!"
Tsukushi Makino jumped as the door to the shop burst open and clattered against a display case set against the wall.
"Domyoji, you jerk!" she sputtered, reflexively hurling the nearest object on hand – in this case the bottle of cleaning solution she had just been using in conjunction with a cloth on the sales counter – at the head that, regrettably, belonged to her obnoxious boyfriend.
Yuki Matsuko, co-worker and best friend, winced as the full plastic bottle struck the billionaire heir to Domyoji Corp directly between the eyes. Tsukushi's aim was only improving from spending time with Tsukasa Domyoji and his friends. While he was down for the count, clutching his forehead and cursing louder than was necessary, Yuki admonished her friend lightly.
"Really, Tsukushi, you ought to watch that temper," she said gently.
"But he's always got to – to stride! into a place like some lord of the manor!" Tsukushi protested, otherwise ignoring said individual. "Why can't he ever behave like a normal person and not a caveman?"
Yuki giggled a bit at that. "I don't think he can be a caveman and lord of the manor, Tsukushi."
Tsukushi rubbed the back of her head sheepishly, a grin creeping onto her face. "No, I guess not – " she began, when Tsukasa cut in irritably.
"Does anyone care that I'm injured?" he demanded.
Yuki put a hand to her mouth. "Oh, sorry, Domyoji! It's just, you know, she does it so often and you're always okay after all and – "
A vein twitched on Tsukushi's brow, her fist unconsciously clenching into a fist and her eyes narrowing irritably at him. "Why, you – "
"Nevermind," he interrupted, scowling. His long legs brought him up to the counter in two steps and he planted his big hands on the counter top. "Make sure you take off work this weekend. Thursday and Friday, too. We're leaving Thursday."
Tsukushi and Yuki both gaped.
"You look like a couple of goldfish,"grumbled Tsukasa, lifting his eyebrow maddeningly. "C'mon, Tsukushi. Don't act like you're clueless."
She finally found her voice. "Know what? What the hell are you talking about?"
He grimaced as he turned to leave. "If you don't have anything to wear, make sure you let me know today so we can go shopping before we leave."
Yuki quickly extricated the stapler – this time the handiest item to hurl – from her friend's grasp before the heavy object could be flung at Tsukasa's curly retreating head. "Where are you guys going?"
Tsukasa looked back over his shoulder and flashed a smug, triumphant smile. "We're going to Hawaii! Tsukushi wanted to go with me!"
"I do not want to go to Hawaii!" Tsukushi raged in the background.
"Hawaii was your idea," he frowned, pointing one long finger. "So don't try to get out of it now. I've already bought plane tickets and booked the hotel."
With that, he swept out the door.
Yuki turned to Tsukushi in surprise. "Is that true? I think it's fantastic that you want to take a vacation with Tsukasa. It'll be good for you two."
Tsukushi was turning blue with suppressed hysterics. "I have no idea what he's talking about! I never said we should go to Hawaii! You know how he gets!" Her tone turned conspiratorial. "Sometimes I think he might just be delusional."
Yuki blinked. "Delusional?"
Tsukushi pointed her nose in the air and crossed her arms stubbornly. "Anyway, I can't take time off from work!"
Right on cue, the owner of the store stepped out of the back office and sighed. "Sorry girls, but we failed inspection and need to have repairs done this weekend. I'll pay you for the days anyway, but we're going have to close until after the weekend."
Yuki clapped her hands together exuberantly. "Perfect."
Tsukushi glowered. "Uh-uh. Not going."
"This will be good for your relationship," Yuki hissed into her ear as the boss puttered with paperwork a few yards away. "You need the time alone."
"Time alone for what!" Tsukushi exclaimed, her voice rising enough to startled a pair of customers entering the store.
Yuki gave her the Look. The other girl's face instantly turned bright red.
"That?" she choked out in a stage whisper. "Oh, no. That is not a reason for going anywhere."
Yuki just smiled sweetly. Tsukushi crossed her arms.
"I'm totally not going."
Okay, short first chapter. Nothing special about it, really. But read and review. I plan to have a lot of fun with it. – luvs –