Hello everyone, I originally did not intend to continue this, but it seems that both my professional life at FanFiction as well as my personal life is filled with angst, and I really need a good laugh. Hopefully you feel the same way, and enjoy reading this, just as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Just as kind, sensitive Draco was contemplating the spillage of his arterial blood, the door to the bathroom was thrown open. An audible gasp could be heard, which fit into the theme that the author has worked so hard at portraying.

'Draco, what are you doing?' shrieks an obviously shell-shocked Ginny.

'What does it look like I'm doing?'snarls Draco in reply. 'Now go away and let me contemplate my preferred mode of self-destruction in peace.'

Now ofcourse Ginny cannot be allowed to simply turn around, shut the door and mind her own business, not at all, or else how will the author thrust in the fact that Ginny is now able to percieve Draco's kind and sensitive nature which previously was known only to Harry? And so she runs towards Draco, once again in slow motion, so that the reader's can fully appreciate the gravity of the situation, as well as her creamy thighs as a gust of wind blows, for the author has managed to successfully evade the fact that they are in a bathroom, and Draco forgets about the scalpel for a full minute while he too is overcome by lust.

Ginny dashes to the floor beside him and grabs the scalpel. 'I cannot let you do this Draco, you are so young, and your whole life is ahead of you.'

'What else should I do? You are now wealthier than me, Harry is now "Slytherin God", and my father wants me to be a death-eater.' His whining is absolutely acceptable, for author decides that kind and sensitive Draco is a man who is not afraid to remain in touch with his feminine side- a metrosexual.

Now author decides that it's time that Ginny takes matters into her own hands, maybe even so literally, and the next few sentences explain it all.

Ginny kneels down in front of Draco ernestly, the neckline of her uptil-now-modest blouse, suddenly dipping to her waistline, for the author would have decided that Ginny has changed her outfit from her school robes to the present glamarous rags, sometime in between all the above.

Ofcourse as intended, Draco would be overcome with primal lust on seeing her breasts, which author will take great pains to describe, sometimes even as being ripe melons, for after all she has filled in over the summer.

Draco with a savage growl grabs her and begins to demonstrate his ardour, and Ginny can do nothing but respond, while she cradles his head, for she cannot stop this growing longing within her, and the author feels very pleased that such a romantic setting has been envisaged in a bathroom! Oh the unlimited boundaries of imagination………….

Now while Draco is taking the much needed time, to fill Ginny with his seeds, so that author can at a later point have Ginny announce in an extremely dramatic fashion, complete with tears that she is pregnant, the new "Slytherin sex-god" was bonding with his new found father in the dungeons. The author at this point must be complimented on the choice of scenic locales for emotional or sexual dramas of any sort.

'Father' sobbed Harry in Snape's arms. 'I've wanted to know you for so long.'

'Son' said Snape, tears running down his cheeks, 'I've wanted to know you for so long too.'

And so each sobbed in the other's arms for a considerable period of time, which will be determined by the author. And author feels extremely pleased that two such pained characters, who have been misunderstood their entire lives have found solace within each other.

'I always thought you hated me and James' hiccoughed Harry.

'I hated James, I still do for he was the man who took what was rightfully mine, but I never hated you. If you happened to get that mistaken impression, consider it as part of my new-found excellent acting skills, whereby I misled everybody about your truthful parentage.'

'And all these years I thought I was an orphan, I thought I would have to live with the Dursley's for the rest of my life.'

'I would never let you live there, you shall live alongside me in Snape Manor.'

Ofcourse the author would have completely ignored the fact that Harry lived with the Dursley's up until now, and Snape had let him! Or else the author would decide that Harry now suffers from vestigeal remnants of his abuse at the hands of the Dursley's, for which Snape feels extremely repentant, and hence offers an explanation for allowing Harry to remain with the Dursley's for practically his entire life.

'I could not save you from the evil Dursley's, for had I revealed the truth at an in opportune moment, all would have been lost. Voldemort would have known that Trelawney and the prophecy were fake, and instead of attempting to extinguish your tiny life, he would have concentrated his efforts on world domination, which could simply not be allowed. If you had in an eventuality been killed, it would have been for the greater good, and your sacrifice would not have been allowed to go in vain.'

The reader's now sit back and observe a moment of silence, and allow history to reflect and mark this great moment. They need to observe a moment of silence, for this great element of truth is so vast and threatening that they cannot comprehend it. Author also needs to observe a moment of silence for he/she cannot believe his/her good luck in being pivotally instrumental in recording this monumental moment in history.

And so after Harry and Snape have managed to sort out all the previous years of bitterness in that one monumental moment, they emerge from the dungeons, and Snape awards Slytherin, now Harry's new house, one hundred points, simply because Harry is his son, and is in Slytherin. Harry feels thrilled that his worth is equivalent to one hundred whole points and runs off to play Quidditch, leaving Snape gazing at his retreating figure fondly.

Author will let the readers in on the conspiracy surrounding Snape's dubious Quidditch abilities another time, for it rationales that as author has established Harry's parentage, he has undoubtedly become the star player that he is, due to the talent inherited by Snape's over many generations. Author allows a moment for it all to sink in, and allows the reader's time to weigh the enormity of the situation.

Meanwhile author decides that some excitement ought to figure in Snape's otherwise drab existence, and decides that he too should be blessed with a sex-life in the form of his very own were-wolf. And so Snape feeling the urges insistently nagging, climbs the long and winding staircase to the Astronomy Tower, and emits a low sound very akin to a wolf howl.

Remus having heard the call of the wild from a very great distance, due to his overly sharp and sensitive ears, does not fail to respond and proceeds at once to satisfy his "husband." How the author managed to reach the consensus that Snape is the "husband" and Remus the "wife" in this homosexual realationship will be explained at a later stage.

I hope you enjoyed that, please leave behind a review and let me know what you think.