Disclaimer: I don't own Kim Possible. I did buy a little snow globe with figures of Kim, Ron & Rufus in it, but I'm told that rights to the characters weren't included with the purchase. I was quite disappointed to hear that.

Thanks to MrDrP for beta-reading this.

Disney's
Kim Possible
in

Essential Ron-ness

by
campy

Part the First

"Okay Rufus, I've got two grande orders of nachos here, extra cheese ..." Ron Stoppable began.

"Mmmm, nachos!" the naked mole rat squealed.

"This one's all yours," Ron continued, placing one basket on the floor of the tree house, "and this one's for Kim and me." He put the second basket on a table in front of the old sofa. "I don't want you taking any of ours until I say it's okay. No matter how ... distracted ... KP and I get. Are we clear, little buddy?"

"Yes SIR!" Rufus agreed, snapping to attention and saluting his friend smartly. He dove into his basket and began munching away at his favorite food. "Yum, cheese!"

Ron gave the tree house a final once-over. Everything seemed to be in place. All he needed now was …

"Hey, Ron!" Kim Possible's glorious mane of auburn hair popped up through the hatch. Her big, round, emerald green eyes sparkled, and her smile lit up the room. (Hey, these clichés develop for a reason!)

"KP!" he exclaimed joyfully. He took her hand and helped her the rest of the way up the ladder. Once she had her feet on the floor, she threw her arms around Ron's neck and kissed him hungrily. Ron's arms wrapped around his girlfriend's lithe form and held her tight.

His girlfriend. Just a week ago Ron had pretty much given up all hope of ever pinning that label on any girl—let alone his dream girl, Kim Possible. She'd fallen hard for the new hottie, and Ron had been left way out of the loop. Erik was Kim's fantasy prom date come to life, and Ron sat all alone in Bueno Nacho, without even a bendy straw for his Slurpster.

But that was all in the past. Erik had proved to be a synthodrone designed to play on Kim's emotions. Ron had lifted her spirits when the feisty teen hero had been on the verge of giving up for good, and Kim, Ron and Rufus had defeated Drakken's Diablo robot army and saved the world yet again. Then the prom, the dance and that first magical kiss …

The first of many. Back in the present, Kim ended the latest in the series, and looked into Ron's deep brown eyes. "I've missed you so much" she murmured. "It's been hours since you brought me home last night."

"Likewise, Kimila. C'mere, let's sit down. I got us some nachos."

"Nachos? But Bueno Nacho's still closed. Are these Chef Ronald creations?"

"Not exactly. They're from Rosalita's, that little family-owned Tex-Mex place downtown. They just started a take-out service to cash in on the BN void. Ned's running it for them."

"Good for Ned. Mmmm, these are delicious!"

"Yeah, I helped them a little bit with the cheese sauce. You'd be surprised how hard it is to give authentic ethnic cuisine that certain fast food-ishness."

"Well, my compliments to the chef's consultant." She gave him a quick kiss.

"Boo-yah! KP kisses, now with nacho cheese! This could be bigger than the naco!"

Ron leaned back on the sofa. Kim sat very close beside him; her back against both the sofa back and Ron's left side. Ron's arm was around her tiny waist and his left hand rested on her trademark bare midriff, Kim covering it with both of hers. Ron could just reach the basket of nachos with his right hand, and he could easily run his fingers through Kim's flippy hair. He was very happy.

Kim sighed. "This is so nice. I'm so glad you finally spoke up back in that storeroom. I think that was what I needed to hear from you to realize that you really were boyfriend material. What took you so long to say something?"

"That's easy, KP. I sure knew you were girlfriend material—even before I saw you in that black dress. But with my place down at the bottom of the 'food chain' …"

Kim winced. "Oh Ron, I feel so ashamed that I ever listened to that junk."

"… I figured I was lucky just to have you as a friend. I just couldn't believe that a girl like you could ever want to date a goofball like me."

"Ron, I never want to hear that stupid 'food chain' junk ever again. The idea that some guy is a better boyfriend than you just because he can throw a ball or shoot a puck is stupid. And as for the goofball stuff: that's a mark in your favor. Talking to Mom this week, I finally realized: I don't just want a goofball; I need a goofball in my life. That's how it works in my family. We Possible women are strong and independent, but sometimes we're wound a little too tight for our own good. You probably haven't seen that side of me because I've had my goofball around since I was four." Ron bit his tongue and simply nodded sagely at this revelation.

"The men are plenty strong in their way too, but they all have a goofy side. It keeps them—as well as their wives and daughters—from blowing a gasket. The men and women who marry into the family tend to fit the same templates. My Grandpa was a bit of a goofball, and Nana loved him. Dad has his goofy side too, and Mom is crazy about him."

"Yeah?"

"Crazy enough that I caught them making out in the kitchen just last night."

"Really? What exactly were they doing?"

"Well, they were sitting in the breakfast nook, kissing ..."

"Kissing how?"

"Sort of like this ..." Kim reenacted what she had seen with Ron in the male lead. "And I think Dad's right hand was—um … actually, never mind where his hand was!"

"You're evil, KP. Don't leave the Ronster hanging like that. Tell me where his hand was."

"I can't tell you, Ron. I … uh … I repressed the memory. It was way too traumatic."

"Now you've got me really curious!" he said, with a hint of his old 'Bad Boy' grin. "I know, maybe you'll recover your memory if I find the same spot with my hand …" He began to move his hand up from her waist to her ribcage.

"Ronald Stoppable, you move that hand one more inch and you'll have a new nickname by Monday: 'Steel Hook!'' Kim growled.

"Ooooh, tough talk."

"Well, I'm a tough girl, Rondo. I can back it up if I have to. I think you know that."

"Oh, I know it all right. That's one of the things I love most about you" he whispered, pulling her in for a long kiss.

"Wow …" Kim sighed. "You are much more than just boyfriend material, Ron. You're the finished product. You've got so much going for you. Great chef, great partner in saving the world, you're such a great kisser, and you've always been the greatest friend I could ever imagine."

"That's nice of you to say, Kim. But you know that last one's not really true. What about the time I promised to help you run for class president, then bailed on you and campaigned for Prince Wally instead?"

"Hmmm, all right, that wasn't so great. But it turned out okay in the end. I mean, Wally was probably as good a president as I would have been. He had the time to devote to it, at least. And it was way cool when he started having the trumpeters play a royal fanfare whenever he entered a room."

"Wally did sort of backslide on that democracy thing toward the end, didn't he?"

"No duh, Ron. He started wearing an ermine-trimmed robe to student council meetings ..."

"Don't forget the bejeweled orb and scepter, KP. Ya gotta love the bling-bling."

"Yeah, he majorly backslid on the democracy thing. But he did some good things for the class. So now that I think about it, I have to say: you saved me from taking on a lot of work I didn't really need to do. That's what I call a total Ron Factor way of being a great friend! Thanks, Ronnie!" She turned around and gave him a quick kiss.

"It appears I may have underestimated this teen hero" Ron muttered, sotto voce. He continued, in what was either a very bad Señor Senior Sr. imitation or an even worse Duff Killigan one, "You are indeed a wily foe, Kim Possible. But I predict even you will not be able to twist my next example against me so easily."

Kim half-turned so he could see her face. "Bring," she challenged with a smirk.

"Do you recall the time I interviewed you for the school paper, then deliberately twisted your words and got you stuck in a date with one … Brick Flagg?"

Kim was quiet and still for a long minute. She sat up, slid away from Ron, and turned slightly to face him. She looked a little miffed.

"Y'know, you're right, Ron. That really stunk. You used me to make yourself popular. Thanks to you I had to listen to Adrena Lynn tell every single TV viewer in the whole world that that—that—that lummox was my boyfriend!" Yeah, she was miffed.

"Now KP, you're not being fair. Brick's not really such a bad guy …"

"And I only escaped going on the date with him because he dumped me before it even happened!"

"Yeah, heh heh, lucky break, huh, KP …"

"Now that you've reminded me of that, I wonder if you can remind me why I forgave you?"

Ron considered for a moment, "Um, 'cause I've got cute freckles?"

"You were a rotten friend to me that day, Ron Stoppable. And now you think you can make some silly joke and we'll just laugh about it?"

"Uh … no?"

"I don't want to laugh about it, Ronald. I so don't."

Ron had never fallen from the highest heights to the deepest depths so fast, even on a mission. Just moments ago life had seemed perfect. Now it appeared he'd lost Kim as girlfriend and best friend too. He looked up at Kim ...

to be continued ...