Unwanted

A/N: Thank you for the reviews, I really do appreciate them! I hope this answers some of your questions, well lets put it this way, it's supposed to! Umm, again this chapter was written on holiday, in the car, straight after the chapter before (I can't actually read certain parts of the page from the car moving lol) so that might have rubbed off on it, I warn you.

I also warn you that based on what I now know (I must have been a total dumbass when I wrote the original fic), this doesn't match up with what actually happened in Without A Trace (Samantha's marriage). So yeah, sorry. Oh and if anyone watches CSI, yes I did base Maddy a little on Madison McReynolds (Lindsey Willows) but with brown eyes and freckles ;)

Disclaimer: Don't own anything, apart from the characters of Ellie and Maddy and any others you don't know that I mention.

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"She… what? How do you know?"

Looking as if she might cry, Ellie spoke softly, "She begged me to bring her here. Her foster parents were in a car accident… she's back at the house. Mom's all about policy – she was going to send her to another home! So I snuck away and drove here. Maddy was desperate,"

Samantha's eyes closed, a sudden headache coming on. This was crazy – Madeleine, the child she was never supposed to have… the child which she gave up at the age of 5 – she wanted to live with her. No it wasn't crazy, it was impossible. She'd moved on. Forgotten the time when she was a stupid 16 year old girl who slept with anyone and everyone. Forgotten the guy who'd given her what she really deserved. A life sentence as it were, but a life sentence that had been cut short.

"Where is she?"

Blushing, Ellen glanced at the car. Sam's eyes went from the SUV, to her cousin and then back to the SUV, "You left her in there?"

"Yea, sleeping,"

Standing up, she gestured for Ellie's keys and they went out to the car. "Great," was all that left Sam's mouth as she unlocked the car. Immediately spotting the girl on the back seat, fast asleep, her heart missed a beat.

Maddy's blonde hair was tucked behind her ears, not a strand out of place and a content smile played her peaceful face. Just like her mom, several freckles were scattered across her shoulders a pale blue vest top covering any others that she probably had. A bunch of suitcases covered the rest of the back seat; the 11 year old snuggled in among them. Samantha closed the door quietly with a small sigh.

"She can't stay," Turning back to the apartment, she practically ran back up the steps and inside, Ellie following.

"Sam! How can you straight away say no? She's been unwanted all her life; going from home to home, and for the second time her own mother doesn't want her either. Please don't tell me that there isn't a part of you that just wants to tell her everything will be alright, that she can have her family back,"

Hiding the tears, she sunk back into the couch, "You can't just turn up at my boyfriend's apartment and expect me to drop everything to have her live with me. It's not that I don't want her, believe me I do. I would give anything to be part of her life again. But it wouldn't be fair on her! I work early mornings, late nights. I'd never see her, she'd be alone most of the time,"

"Who would be?"

Samantha's head snapped round to Martin who was now stood in the doorway, dressed for work, a puzzled look on his face. Suddenly remembering where she was meant to be, she looked down at the pale green, oversized shirt she was wearing. She panicked, "Uh, don't worry! I'd better be getting ready for work. Ellen was just leaving, weren't you?" Her eyes jolted from Martin to Ellie and then down at what she was wearing, "Great to see you Ellie,"

Raising his eyebrows, Martin stayed still, blocking any escape from the situation that Samantha may have attempted. His fingers wrapped around the top of his tie and he loosened it. The two women in the hallway stood equally still, confusion on Ellie's face, an unreadable expression on Sam's. Silently, they waited for Martin to speak, which he obviously was going to do.

Martin wasn't sure what to say. The fact that he had no idea what they'd been talking about before he arrived didn't help. One thing he could be sure of though was that Sam hadn't told him everything, and her cousin was not just about to leave.

"Samantha Spade, you never have been a good liar," He said simply, cringing as he realized how much like his father he sounded. But it was enough to give Ellie the courage to speak up.

"Actually, I'm not going anywhere. There are a few things you need to know. You might want to sit down for this.

Nodding, he led them through to the lounge. Samantha silently followed her cousin.

-

"She… what!" He couldn't believe what he was hearing and had to blink a few times to check he wasn't dreaming.

Her bottom lip trembling, Sam sat perfectly still, listening to Martin's reaction. She remembered using the exact same words just minutes earlier, though it felt like an age ago. One thing kept her from standing up and running away; his reaction when he found out about the affair. Although he was mad at first, little over two weeks after he confronted her about it, they were in bed together. He was the forgiving type.

"She has a little girl called Madeleine," Ellie repeated, "Sam was only 17…"

"I am here you know,"

Turning to her cousin, Ellie pulled a face, "Fine, you tell him. You should have long ago,"

"Does Jack know?" Martin blurted out.

He's still jealous, Sam thought, pulling at the bottom of the shirt which she was still wearing. After all this time, he's still jealous. Without really realizing she was doing so, she shook her head. Martin looked a little better, though she could still see the hurt in his blue eyes.

A million questions filled Martin's mind as he worked through all the details he knew about her past, trying to paste them together like some weird jigsaw puzzle. She's not one of your cases he had to remind himself. What was weird though was that he could imagine Sam but a decade younger, pushing a buggy through the streets, and to be honest, it scared him. It scared him to think how easily he could imagine that.

"My family discarded me. I ran away from home when I first found out and when I went back to them, they didn't want to know. For years the only connection I had to my parents and my sister were Ellie's side of the family. Her mom and dad were like the caring parents I never really had. Of course Ellie was only 7 or 8 then, but I treated her like my little sister," Sam said softly, but loud enough for Martin to not miss a word.

It was a side of her he'd never seen before. Maybe he'd almost experienced it the awful day when she'd been shot. The day he thought he'd lost her. The day he'd realized he was in love with her. But even then, her vulnerability hadn't been quite this bad; she'd stayed somewhat like the Sam Spade he knew. No, this was definitely different.

"I couldn't take it anymore. Helen had just started a foster home when Maddy was born, and I had watched as many children found new homes over the 5 years. So one day, I packed her a bag and drove to Helen's. I told Maddy… I told her…" Tears got the better of her, forcing her to pause for a moment, before continuing, staring into space again, "I told Maddy we were going on vacation, but when we got to the house I said goodbye and never saw her again. I didn't forget her… I just learnt to ignore the pain. After a while I got used to not thinking about her and I moved on, became an FBI agent. The rest you know,"

Slowly understanding, Martin put an arm around her, but it was like hugging a wax model. Just remembering it all… it made her feel sick. Sick beyond belief. She closed her eyes and finally sunk into his arms, her head resting on his shoulder as she cried. Trying to calm her, Martin kissed the top of her head, almost forgetting Ellie was even there. He didn't notice a pretty freckled face appear at the window, tears falling from her soft brown eyes. Nobody noticed.

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A/N: Well that was certainly longer, dontcha think? The next chapter needs some work so it's going to take a while to sort out.