"They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself." Andy Warhol

Yeah, I was smart and brilliant witch. If I didn't know myself, I'd surely call myself an arrogant bastard after one glance. But, really, I'm not. I've lost track on how many hours I've put into school each day. Why? To succeed. To prove my blasted sister wrong, so I can laugh in her face. Yes, Petunia. You are wrong. I am gifted, no matter what you say. Various teachers have told me so. I would smile in return, perhaps even blush a little bit. In fact, I'm even in something stupid dubbed the "Slug Club".

When I'm swimming in galleons and living the luxe life, she'll regret it.

So tell me why I have a tiny bottle of Absolut (don't worry, it turns into the regular 750 mL bottle with just a simple charm) hidden in the lining of school robes (and another one in my goose-feather stuffed pillow).

I don't know why either. I was just contemplating to tear off my robes, rip it into shreds, and chug down the whole damn thing.

Before I pulled out my wand, I stopped to think.

Was drinking really the solution to all my problems?

In a heartbeat, I decided 'Yes', and immediately screeched out "ENGORGIO!"

The seams of my robe split, but I'd fix it later. That was what magic was for. I was currently in the kitchens of the house-elves, finishing up a little snack that consisted of French fries and lots of ketchup. I leaned against the wall as I took a sip of my Absolut. This was perfect. I ignored the weird, curious glances of the house-elves. "Water," I explained quickly, wiping my lips with the back of my hand. "I'm thirsty."

They nodded and quickly scampered away.

I, Lily Evans, was a hard-working girl with a small addiction. But it was the big picture that really worried me, not the small things.

Life bored me. Life in general was absolutely fascinating, but I've always felt that my life was drab. I had a longing, a secret desire—an urging, if you will, to find something new and add a dash of excitement to my tedious lifestyle. Thrills, people had once said, was the thing I lived for. The stirring of that rush was just like a little slice of heaven to me. After all, all work and no play makes Lily quite a bored little girl.

I took another swig of my lovely Absolut. Now, that was a thrill.

I liked going on adventures; it was as simple as that. I was brave and daring; perhaps that's why they even sorted me into Gryffindor in the first place. I just loved discovering something new or having fun.

I did not want to be described as dreary; my life goal was to avoid this. I was a complex person—with layers, I told myself. Nothing was simple to me, even the Hufflepuffs, who seemed single-celled most of the time. They were also complex people with layers. It's the complicated things inside that build up to make the exterior feel simple. To me, everything was an intricate puzzle.

I knew I could not change... why was I so obsessed with that feeling? I knew I would never change because who can change their true selves? I hated it when people masked themselves because, more often that not, it fails, and their true selves ended up shining through proudly.

Realizing this inevitable truth, I had no choice but to be myself and finally realize—I'll admit it here and now—I was bored with things. I hated having to go to the same old loathsome routine everyday. I wanted life to be fun and exciting. After all, we could be leaving this place anytime, and I wanted to make life a party as long as I was still here.

So, in all my years of living so far, I'd learned that in order to have fun and experience new adventures, you'd have to have some friends. I loved them very much and we spent each passing moment with each other. Being with them felt like going for a quick, relaxing dip in the pool. Instantaneously, there is that feeling when you first jump in and absolute coldness envelops your whole body. You feel like you're in another world. Your problems are gone, your eyes are tightly shut, you can't breathe, and you feel serenely numb, in the iciness of the chlorinated water. With them, I just let all my troubles and worries out the window. In fact, I let everything go. I was pretty much up for everything and anything when it came to doing something with my friends.

I charmed my darling Absolut to be tiny again and stuffed it into my bra. It was the safest place for it for now and besides, my robes were ruined. I realized it was already six o' clock in the evening, and I cursed under my breath—in a ladylike manner, of course—and ran as fast as I could back to my room.

The first Friday night of the year had just begun. Everybody was getting together because we had all just arrived. It was during the beginning of my fifth year and I had been late to meet my best friends. They sat at a circular table, looking ridiculous with loose wife beaters on, and large hats with huge visors.

"Where the hell have you been, Evans?" Andromeda Black demanded as soon as I entered.

"Yeah, it seems like we've been waiting for forever!" Narcissa Black exclaimed, the dearly beloved sister of Andromeda, pointed out, shaking her head.

"They insisted on coming," Adrienne Voscura's voice said lazily over from her bed.

"Voscura paid us," Narcissa grinned. "She begged us, so Andy and I came."

"Bullshit," Adrienne replied, flipping through the pages of some magazine carelessly. "They just wanted the free drinks. Besides, I've lost too much at that damn game to keep playing."

I glanced at the table. Large, multi-colored chips were randomly scattered upon our table, along with flutes of what seemed to be vodka.

"I was sipping some of the Absolut. Anyways, it seems like you guys already started without me." I raised an eyebrow.

"Sipping? Chugging more like. You should really stop with the Absolut, you know. Anyways, starting without you was Andromeda's idea, all the way," Cecily Marseille murmured, piling up the chips. "Well, grab a chair! Let's start!"

"Wait, where's Genevieve?" Genevieve Blythe was another of my closest friends.

"Reading or some bullshit like that," Adrienne responded. "Homework, probably."

"On a Friday night?" I heaved a sigh, pulling out a chair. "She should really be here and having fun with us."

"Try to convince her to come then," Cecily answered. "God only knows why she won't leave that Library."

"Perhaps she's snogging Madam Pince," Andromeda suggested.

I put on my visor, ready to play. "Doubtful. As sexy as Madam Pince is, Genevieve is never attracted to anybody." I counted my chips. "I'm missing a red one, Andromeda. Or did you do that on purpose so you could win?"

"You got me, Evans," Andromeda replied, smirking. She threw a red chip at me and I caught it.

"Good luck," I quipped.

We were doing what all studious little fifteen-year-old girls were doing on Friday nights, of course.

"Damn you, Cecily! Burn in hell!" I exclaimed, shooting her a glare.

Cecily smiled back sweetly. She was used to this. "Love you, too."

"You... suck," Andromeda finished weakly, unwillingly pushing poker chips towards Cecily. "A lot."

"It's just a game!" Cecily pointed out, shaking her head, extending out her arms to collect on all the chips. It was a high pot, and, naturally, Cece took it home.

"I agree."

"That's because you won," Andromeda shot back.

Cecily grinned. "I know."

Narcissa and Andromeda were two dear girls who were both terribly sweet. Both of them were also Slytherins. I hated how everybody expected that just because they weren't in Gryffindor–god forbid–my friends and I were forbidden to befriend them, let alone even speak to them. I do have some pride, but I don't have much pride for my house–especially with all the idiots in my house. To ignore somebody just because they're not in the same house as you? That's completely daft. But, sadly, my opinion wasn't shared by many in my school. So, to put them in their place, I would whisper the password to our common room whenever it changed and they would do the same for us. I felt it was a win-win situation. They pissed off the jerks in their houses and so did we.

While the girls broke up into a heavy discussion about other card games to replace poker ("Bullshit!" "No, Bullshit is bullshit!" "Hm.. how about Go Fish, then?"), I reflected upon my life so far since another school year was already approaching. My family was all right. They could be a little too damn charismatic at times, but I loved them for even trying. My mother was a simple woman–she kept mostly to herself. She retired from her job so she could be a full-time mother to her children. Unfortunately, I inherited her bright red hair and pale skin. My father, Harold Evans, a Muggle, was considered to be a successful businessman. He was around the age of forty-five, but with his good looks, you'd think he'd be thirty. He had a good-natured laugh, sandy brown hair, and piercing green eyes.

And, of course, who could forget my lovely sister? Petunia had the looks of a classic beauty. Sparking sapphire eyes with different flecks of aquamarine and royal blue, wispy, curly, long blonde hair cascading down to her chest, and pouty lips that were usually lined with a dark colored rouge... she was the pride of my parents, but absolutely abhorred the mere sight of me after she found out I wasn't 'normal'. Maybe it was because of the fact that my parents prided my magical skills and started juxtaposing us as soon as I got my Hogwarts letter. But I was jealous because she had been blessed with the ideal genes. It was clear who the beautiful one in this family was. Even considering the fact that we were flesh and blood, she just simply hated me. So, I decided to ignore her and hate her right back.

Combined with the traits I'd received from my dear mother, I had my father's eyes. They were an emerald green with a delicate sheen to them. But, to myself, I always hated my appearance. I've always felt a little sad whenever I looked into the mirror and saw my green eyes. They reminded me of my father, whom I've never really liked. My mother and I also clashed horribly, just like my auburn curls and colorless skin. I hated expressing my emotions and myself. I do not know why, but it had become a habit—and habits were hard to break. Especially bad ones.

Whatever it was, my parents divorced when I was nine, Petunia twelve. It was hard, of course, but it got better. Sometimes I would summer with my mother, sometimes with my father. It didn't make any difference. We barely talked.

Even though I wasn't my mother's biggest fan, the thing I treasured most was a black leather book she'd given me when I was very young. It was from her private collection of books. It was blank, so I wrote in it. I like to think she loved me when she gave me it, and it will always serve a reminder of that love; the love between a new mother and her newborn child. It was hardly a book anymore, though. Dilapidated black leather covers bound round, thick fading paper. In a way, this is my journal. I scrawled down events that I thought mattered: silly jokes, riddles that made me think, inspirational quotes, and little drawings here and there. At times, it was my sole source of comfort.

In spite of everything I've been through and dislike about myself, I considered myself a happy and lucky girl. I had best friends, some money, good grades, and an escape from the family I disliked.

"Anyways, girls," Andromeda began, brushing a lock of her dark hair out of her face and shot us an excited look—which could only mean one thing. "You know 'the Marauders', as they like to call themselves? They're having a party to kick start another year... I heard it's going to be Gryffindors exclusively." She shook her head and looked extremely annoyed. "Those silly little boys, when will they ever learn? But all the more fun to crash it, correct?"

Narcissa grinned. "Definitely. It would be such a nice surprise for our dear cousin. I can't believe he forgot to invite us."

"He never was too smart," I added sarcastically. "Like the rest of the Marauders."

"Their party last year was pretty awesome though," Cecily mused.

"Those were some good times," Andromeda nodded.

I laughed. "When is it not a good time at one of their parties?"

"Good point," Narcissa replied.

"So, we're going?" Adrienne looked up from her magazine.

We nodded in unison.

"Fabulous." Adrienne looked down again.

I grinned.

And so did they.

&&&&&

The New Years Party exceeded all of our expectations. Like always, the Marauders never ceased to surprise us—even if they weren't the cleverest group of boys. Since it was a Gryffindor only party, it was held in the Gryffindor Common Room. How McGonagall ever let them throw such a fabulous party would always be a mystery to me. The Common Room looked breathtakingly amazing compared to its usual facile splendor of Gryffindor cheer which got dull after awhile. It was refreshing and new with intricate decorations, but still had a hint of the familiar old Common Room, which we all liked to relax in. It was weird, thinking some group of misfit boys doing the job so great. Music was blasting, balloons were floating peacefully, each depicting an emotion, drawn on messily, but still rather adorable. Snacks and drinks from Hogsmeade littered the tables, and everyone seemed to be having a great time either chugging Butterbeer, racing to see how many Chocolate Frogs one could stuff in their mouths, or just other meaningless activities

It was only around eleven—the night was young, and the party was just beginning to start. I looked around for my friends and as I did, something went up my nose. I then realized that candy from Honeydukes was levitating, and filling most of the room!

I giggled as I stuck out my tongue to lick the chocolate frog and then removed some kind of yellow hard candy from my nostril. Mmm... delicious.

"Hey, Lily!" Adrienne shouted, dancing with some guy I had never seen. Was he even in Gryffindor? I guess students from the other houses probably heard about the party and snuck in too. For such pranking geniuses, the Marauders sure had their faults.

Cecily was right next to her, looking like she was having the time of her life. "Get your butt down here!"

I smiled. "No thanks! I'll be over there with the drinks!" I yelled over the loud music. The music was getting excruciatingly loud; I felt as if my eardrums were going to explode. Although parties were fun and all, dancing wasn't really my thing. I didn't like or have the urge right now to be embarrassed in front of my peers.

And besides, today was the last day of the year, so why not celebrate with a drink?

As soon as I reached the bar, I smiled. Gustov Friedrich, a sixth year Ravenclaw who I also assumed was the bartender for this lovely event, smiled back. I guess it wasn't Gryffindor-only. Gustov helped me with, ah, certain affairs when I was younger. Butterbeer ones.

"What'll it be, Lily?" He shot me a smug grin. "Nothing too hard, alright?" His accent was adorable. He was originally from Germany but transferred to Hogwarts his third year from Durmstrang, but I didn't know why. I never bothered to ask.

"The regular," I shrugged. "You know."

He chuckled. "You have quite a few regulars. Which one?"

I paused. "How about butterbeer? I haven't had that in a while."

"Surprising choice. Not hard at all, I'm surprised." Gustov commented. He muttered something under his breath.

A large thermos of warm butterbeer appeared in front of me.

I smiled appreciatively. "New trick?"

Gustov shrugged. "It's handy. Especially for people like you."

I smirked. "Thanks, I'll take that as a compliment." I quickly grabbed the large thermos and settled into a large, overstuffed maroon armchair, which felt even more comfortable than the last time I had sat in one. The party was overrated. The real fun was right here, sitting on my lap. The warm flavor hit my lips like a tidal wave. It was simply delicious and I have never felt so warm in my life.

"Getting drunk already, huh, Lily?" A low voice asked me slyly, nudging me. "Damn, Gustov is sure nice to you."

I raised an eyebrow. Sirius Black. Another daredevil who I had yet to go on an escapade with. He was genius, but also very immature. We were put on speaking terms when we were stuck as partners in Potions class third year, and I can safely say that it has not been boring since.

"Actually, this is butterbeer. Besides, there's nothing to do tonight other than dancing. And, sorry, Sirius, but I don't want to embarrass myself tonight." I grinned. "Like you already have... many, many times."

"Just having fun, Lily, just having fun. Anyways, do you have any idea how my dratted cousins got in?" Sirius asked, with a wry smile. He was talking about Narcissa and Andromeda, but I really do not know why he dislikes them so! He settled himself onto a place on the couch next to me.

"Not the slightest clue," I replied vaguely whilst sipping my butterbeer innocently. "Nice decorations."

"Don't be sarcastic, the Marauders have worked loads on this party, if you haven't noticed. For instance, the floating candies... my idea, naturally." He beamed and devoured lemon drop. His face turned sour. "Damn, lemon drops are bitter."

I laughed as I drank the last of my butterbeer, savoring it, since there was no more. But, it refilled automatically and I smiled appreciatively.. "Genius idea, Black. So incredibly genius that one even went up my nose," I replied dryly. "Nice trick."

"Can't say I don't agree with you on that one." He levitated one towards himself. "But come on Lily! Dance like there's no tomorrow! Today is the last day of the year, you know! Why not celebrate with dancing?"

I gave him a sardonic smile. He had the exact same attitude as I did, which was slightly comforting to know. I was a bit tempted; he was asking me to dance. "Alright," I said after a pause. "But you can't make fun of me!"

"Make fun of you?" Sirius grinned. "I think you'd Avada Kedavra me first before that would ever happen." He grabbed my hand and twirled me. Surprisingly, he didn't fling me off and throw me into the wall, like last time. But that's another story. We danced gracefully and smoothly. His dancing sure has improved.

"So, see anything you like? I'd be happy to help." He twirled me.

I rolled my eyes. "Please, Sirius," I scoffed as I rolled back into his arms.

Then, we went into a dip. He stared at me with his daunting gray eyes and raised an eyebrow playfully. "Oh, really?"

"Yes, oh really. Everybody knows all the good-looking guys are in Hufflepuff and I see absolutely no Hufflepuffs at this party." He twirled me again and unleashed me from that dip.

"Merlin, that's a horrible excuse." Sirius shook his head.

I clutched on tightly to his shoulder, just in case. "That wasn't an excuse! It was the truth!"

He moved his body to the beat of the rhythm and to my body. "Good, because that was one hell of an example of a horrible excuse. I would've imagined something better from you." He smirked. "After all, you are my protégée."

I snorted. "Protégée? Please, Black! You give yourself too much credit. Teaching me a few tricks up your sleeve does not make me your protégée."

"It's okay, Lils. Keep on denying that I wasn't the one who taught you everything you've learned," Sirius answered sympathetically, patting my arm. "Who introduced you to butterbeer in the first place?"

"Padfoot, somebody's choking on one of your damn lemon drops!" James waltzed on over, with martini in his hand. "Remember what happened last time?"

The color drained out of Sirius's face. "Yeah, McGonagall will pin me up on one of the Quidditch hoops stark naked for a damn week if someone gets sent to the Hospital Wing at a Gryffindor party again, dammit! Later, Lily!" Sirius rushed off as fast as he could. Despite his boyish and adorable charms that worked more often than not, Minerva McGonagall was one woman he could not sweet talk out of anything.

"Lily?" James asked. "Hey Lily."

"Hi James," I responded simply. I did not really know him. All I knew about him was he was smart, rich, and on the Gryffindor Quidditch Team as a Chaser. Not partial to meeting new people, I quickly turned around, ready to leave him.

James must've known what I was about to do. "Not so fast. Turn around."

I turned around. I've never really noticed James Potter before, why should I start to now? I decided to give him a little shock just to see how he'd respond. In the few seconds since Sirius had sprinted off, it had gotten a bit boring." Look. All you need to know that my name is Lily." I got a little closer, feeling a hint of a buzz. "Memorize it, learn it, and love it, because you'll be screaming it later." I mustered up my sweetest smile.

He looked quite taken aback, I think he even shrank a little bit. "Well... er, I'm James Potter."

Inside my mind, I laughed at how petrified he seemed right now. "I know. Hello James."

"You're in my Charms class, right?" James asked, furrowing his brow. Suddenly, he didn't seem so dull. He looked quite adorable when he was trying to think. Innocent, too, but we both knew he was far from it.

"Yes. A class out of the many I'm beating you in." I knew he was just another boy in the classes that were all part of my boring life, but tonight he was so adorably confused by me, he seemed exciting and brand-spanking new.

"It's an irrelevant subject—it's stupid." He took the olive from the toothpick, swirled it around in his drink, and ate it. Talking about classes seemed to give him a slight bit of confidence, so I kept pursuing the subject.

"Because you're bad at it or because I'm better?" I questioned. "Accio thermos!" My hot thermos of steaming, hot butterbeer had flown into my outstretched hands. I sipped it slowly. It looked a bit ridiculous. I was drinking out of this plastic, average thermos while James looked so sophisticated sipping his vodka out of a martini flute.

He looked up from his drink, with the toothpick hanging out of his mouth with a shocked look on his face. "Well, Miss Evans, I believe if you would check, and correct me if I'm wrong, but I am higher than you in Transfiguration."

"That's because Transfiguration is an irrelevant subject. It's stupid, James. I thought somebody as smart as you would figure that out."

He smiled, taking the toothpick out of his mouth. "I suppose you're right."

"I am. I'm right about a lot of things and great at a lot of things." I took a long swig of my butterbeer.

"So, Miss Evans," James inquired, putting down his drink suavely with a slight grin on his face, "Is there anything you're not good at?"

Following his suit, I put down my large, ludicrous-looking thermos as well. "Well, there is one thing... but you have to promise you won't tell anybody."

"Cross my heart."

It was a stupid thing; I don't even know why I was telling James. "Well, I'm not very good at Quidditch... never even been on a broom before. Sad, huh? I skipped the flying class first year—which is kind of embarrassing since you're the captain, I think, and you're probably the best quidditch player in this school and I'm just about a complete flop at Quidditch... which blows."

He laughed again. "That's hilarious, Lily! Quidditch is so bloody easy! A million times easier than Charms! It's absolutely laughable that you don't know how... almost hilarious."

I hated being teased. "Trust me—if I tried and worked at Quidditch, I could beat you. And you don't beat me in Transfiguration."

"Beat me? That's funny, Lily," James replied lightly, "And, yes, I do beat you in Transfiguration... unless the grades that Professor McGonagall updates do, in fact, lie."

"Not a single ounce of truth in them," I agreed, nodding my head. "I'll beat you in Quidditch... one day."

He leaned in, his eyes glittering and intriguing. "Evans?"

"Yes?" I purred, with quite a few traces of tipsiness.

"Next time, bring your own damn butterbeer," he whispered.

"Huh?"

James leaned back and smirked. "Thanks to you, we're running out. Now I have to go and refill all the butterbeer that you drank. So thank you very much, Lily, for drinking all our butterbeer!"

Well, fuck me.