Raining cats, dogs and mutants
By Todd Fan
Disclaimer: "Hitched a ride on the porcelain express"
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ACT 15 - P-A-R-T-Y!
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We go back to the bridge, where we see the remains of Alex's car.. and Alex bits floating off into the river
"...You killed my brother!", whimpers Scott
"Oh come on, who's gonna miss him?", shrugs Forge.
"I'm not dead", calls Alex from the water, "I feel happy. I feel happy!" (1)
Roberto steers the scooter backwards until it stops on the service area of the bridge
"Jamie?", calls Kitty.
She hops off the scooter and onto the service area, looking around worriedly. Todd limps up, carrying a very limp Jamie in his mouth. Kitty sadly takes Jamie in her arms and hugs him
"Mew?", says Jamie pathetically.
"Jamie?", says Kitty, "JAMIE!"
Kitty happily snuggles Jamie and pats Todd on the head, the gang watching on happily. Roberto blinks and goes to find Amara, who is still clinging to the scooter, her hair frizzled up.
"HAH!", laughs Rahne, "och aye, that's attractive"
"Looks like my friend Pappa Joe", smirks Forge, "...from the seventies!"
We cut to the next day, where Kitty is having a birthday party in the mansion, all the gang there. Everyone singing.
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday dear Kitty
Happy birthday to you
And many more, sings Jason
"Don't forget to make a wish, Kitty", says Warren.
Kitty blows out the candles and everyone cheers
"Can we hurry this up?", asks Jason, "the joy and loving atmosphere is killing me"
"All right, anybody want some cake?", asks Kitty.
"Not if you baked it", says Forge.
Hank is about to reply when he hears Salsa music. He turns to see Roberto teaching Amara how to dance.
"You got it now, baby!", grins Roberto, "Yeah, left foot, right foot"
"Roberto, you dance divinely", grins Amara.
Inside the kitchen, Jason and Warren are watching the wrestling on TV
"He's cheating!", shouts Jason
"Body slam! Come on, hit him again!", shouts Warren, "Murder him! Twist his arm!"
The phone rings and Warren picks it up, changing from primitive monster to calm and proper butler in a matter of seconds
"Pryde residence", he says, "Mr Pryde!"
"Body slam him now!", shouts Jason.
"Shhhh!", hisses Warren, "My goodness, you're back tomorrow? Oh, she'll be so surprised to see you. Yes, goodbye sir"
The second Warren puts the phone down, he's back to the beast he was
"Hit him!", he snarls, "Come on, murder him!"
One of the wrestlers pins another and Warren grins smugly
"I believe that's a ten spot, old sport", he smirks.
Jason looks around his pockets with a nervous chuckle
"Now..where is that cheque book?", says Jason, "Oh, look at the time! Well, heh heh, we'd better be going"
"...Indeed", says Warren dryly.
Jason steals an apple from the bowl and heads into the living room
"Henry, Wanda, Roberto, vamonos!", he calls.
Kitty opens her last present, finding an old trainer
"Now, Kitty, have we forgotten anything?", says Warren.
"Oh, yeah. Thanks, everyone, the gifts were great", Kitty grimaces, "...yeah, right"
We see a pile of old junk
"Bye, Mr Jason, and thank you", says Kitty.
"...Why do I always have to hug people in these parodies?", asks Jason, "I hate hugging"
"Because it's fun", smirks Forge, "now hug her!"
"I don't want to hug you either, for the record", says Kitty.
Kitty gives Jason a hug and Jason pats her on the head
"Come on boys, it's time for us to go!", says Jason, "…now"
"...I smell of monkey", mutters Kitty.
The dogs start to head outside, and Amara smiles sweetly at Roberto heading upstairs
"Roberto, darling, could I see you for a moment", she smirks, ",..privately?"
"Bow chica wow wow", grins Jamie.
"What did I say about that!", snaps Forge.
"You guys beat it, uh me and my baby", Roberto grins, "we gotta talk"
Roberto grins, ignoring the fact Rahne is trying to stick pins in an Amara voodoo doll, following Amara upstairs
"You know, you're not so bad for a bug-eyed little creep", says Amara, "With a little grooming..that's it! We'll start with a bath!"
Roberto. Stops. Dead
"Bath?"
Outside, Jason starts up his scooter, it backfiring black smoke into Warren's face
"Lets go and get this crappy parody over with!", says Jason.
"Bye bye", smiles Freddy, "man, this was a crappy role"
"Oh, Jamie, we shall meet again", says Hank
"See you around, kid", says Wanda
"Bye you guys", grins Jamie.
Jason drives off, the gang following after him, Todd stops to look at Jamie
"Listen, kid, you just wanna hang out or anything..".
We heard a scream and Roberto runs out of the mansion in a sailor outfit
"HAH!", laughs Rahne
"Aiee! Hey, Todd, do you see her anywhere?", Roberto asks, "Man, I can't keep this woman off me! Oh man, I gotta get away from that chick"
Amara appears on her balcony, not looking happy
"Robertoooo!", she calls
"Uh oh..goodbye Jamie!", says Roberto with a squeak.
Roberto runs off as fast as he can, the little outfit falling off him as he goes
"Roberto DaCosta, you come back here this minute!", shouts Amara
"Hey, whoah, kid. Do you think you can handle the champ?", asks Todd.
"Sure", says Jamie.
He holds out a low paw, and pulls it away before Todd and slap it
"Hey! You're okay...for a cat", Todd smirks, "We'll keep a spot open for ya in the gang, vice president, uptown chapter. Later, kid"
He jumps onto a garbage van as it drives away. Kitty waving them away with Jamie and Warren
Why should I worry
Tell me, why should I care
"What a delightful scoundrel", Warren pauses, "...yeah, right...I'm going to get drunk"
Say, I may not have a dime
Oh, but I got street savoir faire
Wanda and Hank land beside him to join in the singing.
Why should we worry
Why should we care
We may not have a dime
But we got street savoir faire
Roberto goes past on top of a police car, hitting the siren like a drum
Why should we worry
Why should we care
It's just be-bopulation
We got street savoir faire
He jumps off, landing with the gang, he and Todd eye up Rogue and Jubilee, both dogs, until Wanda yanks Todd away
The rhythm of the city
Boy once you get it down
Then you can own this town
You can wear the crown
They jumps form car to car, eventually jumping onto the back of the scooter
Why should we worry
Why should we care
It's just doo-wopulation
We got street savoir faire
Why should we worry
Why should we care
Even when we cross that line
We got street savoir faire
The picture zooms out onto Bayville as the parody ends
"Ends?", asks Rahne
"It's over!", grins Forge
"Hahahahahhahaha!", laughs Rahne, "DONE!"
"I'm leaving now and not coming back for a LONG time!", grins Forge, running off happily.
"Wait!", shouts Todd, "Who's going to change us back into humans?...Forge?. FORGE!"
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(1) – Random Monty Python quote!
Well, I'm sure he'll change them back eventually...Well, I hope you enjoyed this parody, do review! I think this is the fasted upgrade I've done so far! Thanks for reading. Ta ta!