Soft

"No Roy, I will not calm down! It's... favoritism, that's what it is! Would you be this way if it were one of your other men? If it were Havok, Hawkeye, Fury... any of them!" His lover glared at him, gold eyes almost sparking.

"Ful-- Edward! Please listen!"

"I don't need to. It's obvious. Look, I wasn't going to say anything before... but you've been getting worse and worse about this lately. It's getting really annoying."

Roy gave his lover a pleading look, absently noting the ticking of the clock in the kitchen. Only a few more minutes. Ed's train would be leaving, spiriting the younger man out of his life again for who knows how many days.

Another mission.

Roy had given him the paperwork for it mere hours ago.

The object he clutched desperately in his arms was soft and warmed from his own body heat. It was the pillow from Ed's side of the bed, and when Roy buried his nose in it, he could, just barely, smell his lover.

He could almost pretend it was Fullmetal in his arms and not just some inanimate object. It was easy to imagine Edward was home, safe, and would soon shift in bed and unconsciously throw a heavy limb over him in the process. That Roy would wake up bruised from the automail and Ed's often restless sleep... but happy... in the morning. Then after that, Edward would blink, turn over to look at him, and smile.

Then everything would be all right.

He had known it was a mistake, but he had opened his big mouth anyways.

It was doubly foolish, really. He knew his lover well enough to know that any concern would be fought against and taken as an insult. He also knew it was... almost hypocritical, honestly... to express worry for Ed over a mission that he himself had assigned to his subordinate. It made no sense.

But he couldn't help it.

It had been like a flash, a brief vision of mangled and burned bodies and what the blond would look like.. staring forward unseeingly, blood dripping down the side of his face. He had seen it as the other man casually picked up his suitcase and made to head out the door of Roy's home.

Minutes later, Ed's expressive eyes were hardened and his voice loud. It wasn't an argument per se, but his lover definitely was insulted and unhappy. He also had no problems letting Roy know all about it.

"I'm an adult now! An adult! If we are going to be sleeping together, I would hope that you'd understand that. You can't be fucking me and treating me like a kid at the same time! ...Not unless you really are some sort of pervert!"

That had stung.

All too aware of their dwindling time, Roy had opened his mouth yet again... but instead of desperate pleas or reassurances, he had only said: "Hardly, Fullmetal. What I gave you were just pointers, nothing more. People of mine have had situations that close to the border before, so I merely thought to pass on some tips born of experience..."

"You thought," Edward's tone was unyielding, "that I couldn't take care of myself. Damn it, Roy...! I would think, after all this time--"

In the end, their... discussion... went nowhere. They ran out of time, and Ed went out the door and Roy to the den to pour himself a hard drink.

That had been a long week ago.

Now Roy lay in bed, sleepless again for the seventh night in a row. He was clinging to a squishy bit of bedding like it was a lifeline, all because of some faint trace of Edward he could still detect on it.

Because of his lover.

Pitiful.

What was it about the Fullmetal alchemist that always cut quick to his heart? That, despite his best intentions, always snapped him out of the unconcerned daze he had developed years ago in a stuffy and dirty apartment and made him react...?

Actually, he was pretty sure he knew the word for it, he heard it often in the high-pitched titterings of the secretarial pool as they grouped together in the dining hall and giggled. It was the same word that stood out on the backs of their silly romance novels, usually in some purple color and flowery font.

Roy preferred to think it was just Ed himself. His lover was an amazing person after all, and the dark haired man knew better than to think he was the first person drawn to him despite every effort to escape. Nor did he doubt he would be the last.

Edward Elric, childish rantings and constant pointless arguments aside, was just like that. A intelligent and strong person who had hardened himself and pushed past many obstacles. A truly admirable and likable individual, really. One that, despite their many problems, Roy was very happy to have as a lover and bed-mate.

That was all.

After many hours of tossing and turning, Roy rested his head on Ed's pillow and finally drifted off to sleep.

When he woke up, he was pressed against something that most definitely was not soft nor squishy. In fact it felt very much like muscled flesh, and when he dared open his eyes, all he saw was gold.

Startled, Roy sat up and disentangled himself from warm and cold limbs to get a better look at what lay next to him.

"Nnnnnnn... Roy? Whaisit?" groaned his lover sleepily. "I was.. 'omfortable."

"When..." He found himself, embarrassingly enough, gaping still. "...Did you get back, Edward?"

That was when the other man looked up at Roy in a slightly more awake fashion, obviously shaking off an exhausted sleep. "A few hours ago... Soon as I got back. If it's the mission report you want, you can wait a few more hours for it, bastard..."

He had given the blond a key, hadn't he?

Of course he had.

"Welcome back, then," relieved, Roy leaned over to plant a chaste kiss on his lover's brow... not daring to do anything more at the minute. For now, he would just be thankful.

The other alchemist blinked and turned over to flash him a smile. "Good to be home. But..." His lover paused. "Next time leave some room for me, okay? You had that damn pillow in your arms again. And you were taking up the whole bed!"

Unable to help it, Roy just laughed in response, ignoring Ed's confused and slightly irritated queries and, later, dirty looks.

It really was fine now.