I know some people wanted a follow up to the first chapter, and after reading Blue Light again I knew I had to tie up some loose ends. I just hope I don't ruin it! Please don't let me have messed it up!

I dedicate this to lies-d, whose wonderful support inspires me to be a better writer. Thanks lies.

--

Blue Light

Chapter 2

--

The only sound in the hotel's empty dark hall was the rustle of Dib's plastic bag of groceries...groceries being some of the local produce and mysterious products with labels in Spanish. He wasn't quite sure what some of the things were, but he was sure that he'd at least survive digestion. Dib opened the door to the hotel. It was the third one they'd haunted in the past four weeks of running and hiding. They progressively moved south. Latin America melted into South America—all of it's beautiful but often troubled landscape was new territory to explore. More camouflage. That's all that really mattered. To blend in like a lizard.

Zim might actually be able to vanish in the rainforests. Not even the rain could stop them. Zim said the scientists, in their glee to poke and prod him, had actually "cured" his allergy to water, but it was the confidence in which Zim said it that made Dib believe. Zim had taken him down to the ocean that first week. He was disguised as a human and had waded in the water as if he'd done it a thousand times. The water lapped around his bare legs and then to his torso. He'd pulled Dib out so far that the water came up to their necks and the waves—soft and lulling—pulling even more, it felt like the sea was making love to them. Dib remembered the waves hitting his neck. It made him panic when Zim pulled him out a little more so that it came only an inch above their chins. Zim was quiet but stayed next to Dib the entire time

Dib wasn't afraid of water. He was afraid of Zim blindly leading him somewhere he didn't want to go.

But, that moment had made normalcy possible and it made his fears controllable. And it was afterwards when they'd gone up to their room to dry off and instead got lost in kissing in the bathroom--that too had felt normal and he had felt unafraid.

But it didn't last. Zim insisted, as he always had in that harsh commanding tone, that they leave and go deeper into Mexico to get as far away from the border as possible. This wasn't far enough, he'd said.

So they moved four times.

Funny, didn't feel like they were going anywhere.

Dib entered the room and tossed the bag on the little round table in the corner. The curtains were drawn as usual. Dib got a fit of paranoia and went back to the door to check the locks. Zim barely gave him a glance from the bed. His red eyes were glued to the TV. It looked like the news but there were wacky elements that could have made it a sitcom or a game show

"Hey," Dib said softly and sat next to him. Zim didn't say anything. Dib sighed and lay back on the bed and closed his eyes. The strain was getting to both of them. Zim wanted to move yet again. Quickly and farther. No stopping this time. Go south, get out of this country, get to Guatemala and past Honduras. Don't stop until you hit the cities of Brazil. What was so important in Brazil? Zim said nothing was important there, only refuge. Always refuge. Dib knew that it didn't really matter how far they went. His father was bound to find them. It wasn't really his father they feared, only his colleagues and the government overseeing the company and the labs.

And Dib actually liked this hotel.

They were running from an invisible enemy. When Dib walked through the streets he was always afraid. Who should he look for? He didn't know and so he was afraid of everyone.

Zim only went out when absolutely necessary. It was a far cry from the earlier days when they played in the ocean. There was that nagging normalcy, but now it was just stupidity and naivety. Reality had hit them and the play in the ocean had stopped. They kissed when they felt lonely and only shared the bed to sleep.

Dib didn't like when Zim was cold to him, only, it was his nature. It wouldn't change the situation. Having sex had nothing to do with Zim being nice. He enjoyed it and enjoyed Dib and his attention. He wasn't alone anymore. His call had worked and now he was dragging Dib into dark places and neither knew if there was any light to be found. Zim sitting on the bed watching TV silently and with a brooding attitude...yes, that was Zim. The alien turned and looked back at Dib half asleep. Dib returned the gaze calmly.

"Did you see anyone?" he asked referring to possible enemies.

"No," Dib replied. Zim seemed disappointed. "I think we're safe—"

"We're never safe anywhere." Zim got up from the bed and peeked out the curtains. Night was at the window. Being in the room for so long made it feel like a prison. Dib came up behind Zim and put his arms around him. The alien stiffened. Dib felt it and it hurt. He tested Zim by kissing his cheek and then his neck. He needed him even when he was distant. Sometimes he was able to pull him back. Dib turned Zim from the curtains and made him look into his eyes. Dib asked himself a critical question: Can I get you tonight?

"I'm tired," Dib said. He pecked Zim on the cheek and then on his lips, but there was no reaction.

"Go to bed then," he replied dully. He wasn't looking at Dib anymore.

"Zim...I'm tired of sleeping alone. Why won't you—"

"You don't sleep alone. We sleep in the same bed." Zim broke out of Dib's grasp and took his place in front of the TV.

"I know you're not acting stupid. You know what I mean." Dib said softly, "I dunno...I just thought maybe it meant something to you. Kissing turns you off now too." Dib turned to Zim. "Tell me to stop and I will. Tell me that what you want us to be and I'll say okay, but don't keep letting me kiss you and say things to you when you don't want it anymore. I'm beyond all that spur of the moment passion shit. I have feelings for you." Zim's jaw was clenched tight. Maybe so tight he'd never be able to open it again. Dib was afraid he'd made Zim angrier than he already was. There was no emotion in his eyes, only the TV's reflection.

I have feelings for you? Dib laughed once. "Did you just hear what I said?" Dib rolled his eyes at Zim and looked through his groceries. This hotel had its own little kitchen and since he was hungry, he made…something. It looked like a taco bred with a burrito and maybe chili. It tasted like heaven.

The moment of uncomfortable realization that your relationship is going nowhere usually disappears when your stomach's emotions take over.

"This is pretty good," Dib said from the round table." He was behind Zim and could watch him without alerting any suspicion. Zim sometimes knew when Dib was watching but otherwise he was oblivious. Now his antennae perked at the sound of food.

"It's like…Krazy Taco but better. Gir would like it." Dib swallowed hard when he said Gir. Zim scooted back on the bed and rolled over on his stomach to look at Dib.

"I heard what you said...I have feelings for you." Dib started to open his mouth but it was full of taco stuff. The way Zim said it almost made Dib think he was saying the same, but it was just an echo. Zim liked to repeat things people said to him. Dib wondered why he did it. Maybe some things took longer to process in his alien brain; he had to say them out loud to make the words real. Zim squinted his eyes at Dib and his antennae fell back. It meant that he was calculating Dib for everything he was worth. God, Dib hated when he did that. So stupid sometimes, but so smart it scared him.

Zim said in a low voice, "Maybe I don't want to kiss you anymore." He rolled over and missed Dib's disappointed frown.

He added, "I don't want to be attached, Dib-human."

"There's nothing wrong with being attached. You think it makes you weak, but it doesn't Zim."

Zim didn't respond. "Zim?"

The alien replied in sing-song whisper, "Zim's sleeping."

Dib smiled and finished his taco.

--

Dib stepped on something half-buried in the wet jungle mud. He looked down as he walked away and saw a broken piece of pottery with jagged, geometric designs. He felt sad leaving it there because it was probably really old and important, but Zim was leaving him behind already. The alien, for all his mental defects, was in very good shape and had no trouble trekking nonstop through the rest of Mexico and Guatemala. Now they had just entered Honduras. Dib was tired. He hoped they would reach the town soon. People equaled technology...usually. Someone was always willing to let a stranger ride in their old truck for a few American dollars. Those bills were the reason they had gotten so far, but Dib was running out of ready money and was in dire need of a bank. Every bank in the world was guaranteed to give anything attached to the Professor Membrane name money.

But Dib was tired.

Why...why am I running?

What if we get caught? What will happen to Zim...to me?

Both Zim and Dib were dirty. Zim was in his holographic disguise. His pants were covered in mud and he was soaked from humidity and sweat. Dib had his black trench coat tied around his waist. Now it was just a stupid and useless burden. Damn he hated the jungle.

"What does GPS say, Dib-human?"

"It's only a few miles. We'll be there before dark. I might even have enough time to get to a bank, but I know we'll at least have enough money to put us up in a hotel."

"If they even have one," Zim remarked cynically.

Dib laughed. "Oh. Yeah, that night sucked." Dib's mind wandered to the night they had to huddle in a crowded train station. Something had happened earlier that day to cause all traffic to stop. Police and guerillas...maybe they were the same...swarmed like ants on a rotting carcass. It was one of the scariest nights. They spent all day looking for a non-existent hotel. It had been burnt to the ground by a militant group bent on causing havoc. Dib didn't care. He was tired. The train station seemed like a good sleeping place, but it was just hell.

Dib might have thanked God when that night ended. He never slept. His eyes were fixed open while Zim slumped on his shoulder in deep sleep. That itself was a precious moment.

He might have thanked God. The nightmare was still going.

The GPS led them to the town of Proteccion, Honduras.

The bank was still open...thank you God!

And the lady at the hotel asked in clipped English, "Hot water?"

--

Zim claimed the bath as soon as they got in their room which was fairly decent. Zim came out a few minutes later squeaky clean and Dib followed suite. They threw their dirty, wet clothes on the floor and dumped their belongings on the ground to sort and dry what was damp. Both were dressed in hotel towels for pajamas. When you've been walking for hours in the unforgiving jungle, the bed does not judge what clothes you have on. Dib wrapped himself around Zim like it was the last time he'd ever hold him.

Dib didn't think sleep would come as easy as it had that night. Zim, perpetually twitchy when he slept, didn't move a muscle.

In the morning, Dib smelled smoke. He opened his eyes to search for the familiar smell.

"Hey," he said groggily, "where'd you get those?"

Zim sighed in a draught of the smoke. "I bought them."

"When?"

"Ah…this morning."

"Is this the first time you've snuck out to get cigarettes?"

"No." Zim suddenly looked very stern. He threw the cig in the ashtray. "We're being followed."

Dib crawled out of bed. "How do you know?"

"I saw Simmons this morning…in the market thingy." Zim hurriedly lit another smoke. He didn't put it to his mouth.

"Simmons," Dib said in a harsh whisper. "If you saw him then...fuck. He's following me, Zim."

Zim narrowed his hard red eyes. "You think? Of course he's following you." Zim crushed his unsmoked cigarette brutally in the ashtray. He started to pace the room, devoured by his own thoughts and concerns. "This was a mistake."

"Well, it would've happened eventua—"

"No, I mean bringing you here. You were a liability and I led you here. What is wrong with me!"

Zim looked at his broken cigarette in the ashtray. His legs felt wobbly. What a waste of a perfectly good smoke. He reached for his pack, but Dib snatched it up. Zim held his hand out greedily.

"Give it Dib."

"No."

Zim huffed. "I went to a lot of trouble to get those, Dib-human."

"Oh really? Enough for you to go out and get noticed maybe?"

"I was in my disguise. Like you said, they know we're here because of you."

"So. Doesn't mean you should go out for extra shit. I only go out for food."

"You could buy me cigarettes while you're shopping!"

"I don't like you smoking!"

"Give them to me Dib. Now."

"No." Dib smirked and repeated slowly, "I...don't...like...you...smoking."

Zim lunged for Dib's hands, but Dib put them behind his back. He was going to enjoy this little game. They raced around the room, tripped over the bed, knocked stuff over

Dib didn't hear the growl, but he felt the tiny strong hands of the alien wrapped around his neck.

"YOU STUPID HUMAN!" Dib choked. He didn't fight back for a moment. He thought Zim would let go, and when he didn't Dib had to kick him away. He coughed and rubbed his sore throat while keeping a cautious eye on Zim. The alien just stood there.

"Thanks," Dib said hoarsely. Zim turned his back on Dib.

Oh no you don't, Dib thought. He grabbed Zim and drug him into the room to fling him roughly on the bed.

"Stay," he ordered. "You've got a bad attitude about stuff ya know?" Zim was still on his back, his chest heaving with barely suppressed anger. His breath was the only sound in the room.

"Why did you even ask me to come?"

Zim answered in a sad whisper, "I know...there is a reason. I just don't know it. Zim can't say."

He whined, "Please give my cigarettes back."

"Fine." Dib threw the pack right into Zim's greedy hands. The alien sat up and grinned his satisfaction. Dib could never resist him.

"So I guess we'll be moving pretty soon if Simmons is here." Dib sat next to Zim, who fondled the pack tightly. He nodded. "Where are we going? When will we stop? I can't run like this forever."

"I don't have a choice."

"Then...nevermind. I can't—" The thought came to Dib quickly. He smelled stale cigarette smoke. It was a bad and impulsive thought.

"What? Tell me Dib-human."

Dib sighed heavily. Say it because it has to be said. It hurts. Say it. Say. It.

"I have to leave you."

Zim gasped. The pack of cigs fell from his fingers. "No..."

"If I stay, they'll find you." Zim grabbed Dib's shirt, clung to him hard, breathed him in, had rage and frenzy in his eyes, wild and terrified. "No," he said again.

Dib held back a sob. You're so melodramatic, Zim. This is all so melodramatic. "I'll leave first thing tomorrow. You can't tell me where you're going." He laughed as a tear ran down his face. "Hell, you don't even know where you're going!"

"Don't. Please...Dib." The alien bit his lip. He was pathetic and cute and beautiful at the same time.

Don't? Dib thought. Don't do this to me, Zim. Just let me go.

Dib put his hands in Zim's little shaking fingers. He said with a slight smile, "Since when did you get so clingy? I thought you didn't need anyone."

Zim shook his head. "I don't need anyone." The alien cried silently.

"See?" Dib caressed Zim's wet cheeks, wiped away the tears, kissed his mouth gently. "See, you don't need anyone." Dib's lips fell on Zim's again with a new realization that this would be the last time. They went to the bed and kissed for a long time. The feeling in their mouths was sweet and sad, it wanted to last forever, but it couldn't when desire was meant to be spent. Zim urged Dib's body over his own. Dib felt the touch like instinct. Skin against skin, Dib pressed into Zim's body hard, heaving and thrusting roughly to make him feel the pleasure his body wanted. Maybe it was something more precious. It was the last time, after all. Zim's thin legs wrapped around Dib's hips tightly. His little body lifted off the bed with each hard upward thrust of Dib's hips.

Zim moaned into Dib's ear. The sound of a breathy "Ah...ah...ah" louder and softer, pronounced at once with a near orgasmic shiver, then dying away, then coming up louder, louder, longer at the end, but always the "Ah."

Like a chaconne, their horrible, chaotic rhythmic dance.

Dib kissed Zim's cheek. They slept. They awoke. They barely talked. They made love again.

The hotel room was their tomb that day. Who knew that a lousy Mexican hotel would be the last place Dib and Zim would ever see each other. Their memories were pressed in the sheets and their sounds were absorbed in the walls.

Dib's brain was overflowing. He didn't want to end this story, but damn, it was the same line repeating...over and over and over.

He was tired.

He was ready to go home.

And Zim didn't need him after all.

When the sun set and Zim was truly asleep, Dib considered leaving in the dead of night. The alien was hidden under the sheets with only his little antennae peeking out mischievously. Dib didn't want to touch him anymore. He needed to touch him again, but he couldn't. Should he leave a note? Should he wait until the morning and say goodbye to his pretty red eyes? They would cry. He couldn't see him cry again.

Dib didn't want to cry again.

So...he left. He left a note that said: I'll see you again, Zim.

It wasn't a prophecy. It was just an empty reassurance. A hope. A desire.

Dib didn't sign it. He had a strange notion of Zim seeing his own name written by someone he knew so he would know that someone at least knew his name.

Someone has written your name, Zim.

I wrote your name, Zim.

--

The last thing Dib wanted to do for Zim was make damn sure no one saw him leave the hotel.

He did see Simmons. Dib made a sinful promise that if he ever had to kill a man, it would be Simmons. He hated the man even before this whole mess. He could kill him here and leave him to rot. Who would care? No, it wouldn't be that easy. Simmons wouldn't be here alone. He was a thin man. His character wasn't far from. Dib wandered the darkness, a dangerous thing to do alone, but it was all for show and he let Simmons and his seedy entourage see him. It was after midnight. Zim was probably still asleep in the hotel. They were seated at a little bar in the main part of the town. Dib hoped they thought he and Zim were sneaking away. He hoped it worked.

Dib didn't know much about his ploy until he got to Guatemala. He paid a man with two young daughters to take him there. They all rode in the back of his truck. When he got to the capital proper, Dib took out a substantial amount of money from Membrane's account and gave it to the man. It was only money.

Dib cried for a long time in his nice, city hotel. Everything happened at hotels. He cried because he was afraid Zim wouldn't have enough money to get by.

I shoulda left more money. I left him poor. Poor Zim. Poor, poor, poor…

He saw Simmons at the airport.

Dib bought a plane ticket home.

The clouds were all around him. He didn't feel far up. He felt very low without Zim.

It haunted him for days. He couldn't sleep.

"You need to go see one of those doctors…which one gives the drugs?"

"Psychiatrist."

"Yeah. Psychiatrist." Gaz took a bite of her pepperoni pizza. "They can write you something for depression or—"

"I'm not depressed, Gaz." Dib sighed. The city skyscrapers towered over the brother and sister at their favorite outdoor spot. Best pizza in the city. It was their ritual. Once broken and now mended with Dib's return. Gaz couldn't say whether she was happy or not. Dib certainly wasn't happy now.

"So?" Gaz looked Dib right in the eye. "You haven't told me what happened."

"There isn't a lot to say. I left him."

"But you had to, right? Come on Dib, stop beating yourself up. I wish you'd believe dad when he says Simmons never found Zim."

"I haven't said his name in weeks."

"He isn't dead, Dib."

Dib shook his head yes.

Yes, I know. He isn't dead.

Dib smiled. But he isn't alive either…not until I see him again.

--

One year.

Eight months.

Two and a half weeks.

Five seconds and counting.

Dib dropped a new test tube on the floor. What a waste.

"Shit," he whispered.

"That's the fifth one today, Dib." Dib cringed.

Dib swept up the shards of glass. "Laney, what are you doing in here?"

"Hanging out."

"You should be working."

"I know. But who cares? And don't call me Laney…it's just Lane."

"You've worked here for a month Lane. Maybe you should start following my dad's instructions and work on the amino inhibitors. Get a head start before I tell dad you've been slacking." Dib smirked evilly at his newest assistant. Lane was the most annoying girl he'd ever met. She was pretty in a severe kind of way. She smiled only when she was saying something nasty and she never listened to Dib or Professor Membrane. Dib knew her credentials well. So she graduated from M.I.T. with the highest honors, didn't mean she was any good.

"Oh, I finished those." Lane put her hands on her very slim hips. Damn cocky too.

"Yeah right. You just got that assignment two days ago. There's no way you could—"

Lane whipped some folded papers from her chart and handed them to Dib. He looked them over critically.

"But…there's no way…how did you?"

"Ha! I didn't graduate from M.I.T. for nothing…Dibby. Besides, I had help from Simmons new lab techie. God he's the best." Dib sighed and gave Lane her lab results back. He ignored the "Dibby."

"Yeah I heard he got someone new." Dib wanted to destroy something whenever he saw Simmons or heard his sniveling voice.

It reminded him too much…

Dib grinned. "So, you had to have help. Maybe you aren't the best after all." Lane snorted. "What's his name?"

"Who?"

"Simmons' new pet."

Lane's mouth made pretty little oval. "Tak."

Tak?

"He's pretty hot too, not like you Dibby. You're cute in a not snobby kind of way. Tak is uber-bastard. He hates my guts." Lane puffed out her chest and smiled. She acted like she was proud of this Tak guy's behavior.

Tak. Tak. Tak. Dib said the name over and over in his head. That name was cutting it close. Was it just a coincidence? Tak was too Irken of a name to be tossed around lightly…Zim?

"Where's Tak now? I'd like to meet him."

"Really? Alright. He's in A-320 now."

Lab A-320. It's where all the leftovers of Zim's life were. Dib peeked through the glass window and saw a man with black hair working on something at a lab table. He entered silently but somehow managed to catch the man's attention. His face was handsome, albeit cold and apathetic. Such deep blue eyes. Dib stood at the other side of the table.

"Hi," Dib greeted. "I'm—"

"You're Dib Membrane. I know who you are."

Ouch. Dib rolled his eyes. "You must be Tak."

"Yes."

"That's an unusual name," Dib said casually. He added, "Where are you from?"

"Russian. California."

"Huh?"

Tak sighed and put down his pen. Dib tried to make out what he was writing.

"The name is Russian. I'm from California. Now can you please leave me alone? I'm very busy." The lab setup looked complicated indeed. Tak seemed to have a grasp of the alien technology but he didn't seem haughty about it.

"What are you working on?"

Tak narrowed his eyes dangerously. "An infinite energy absorption device."

A what? Dib didn't want to betray his ignorance; he nodded slowly. "Okay, well…good luck then." Dib started to leave the room, but he stopped at the door and said to Tak.

"Maybe one day we can work on something together."

There was a short pause.

"Perhaps..." Tak looked over his shoulder and smiled. "…Dib."

--

end.