It's Hilary's thoughts on Kai and their relationship before killing herself. Now, her thoughts are negative towards Kai. But, as you've read before, they're wrong. Kai did feel sorry for what's happening. Still, Hilary doesn't know that and she's hurt. So that's was this is. Her thought's on what's happened.
All right, I've never tried to kill myself. I know a lot of people who have, but I don't feel like asking them what it felt like was a great idea. They do like talking about it. So I did guess at the end. Please don't yell.
Disclaimer: I don't own beyblade. I also don't own Taylor Swift's song 'Cold as You' I did kind of mix the song up a little towards the end.
He did! He got himself a new girlfriend. I guess it was only a matter of time. What was I thinking? This could have never worked out. I can't believe that I thought he could be truthful to me. I mean, he's Kai Hiwatari! He was voted teen-heartthrob of the year, and I thought that I could keep him?
What's worse is he's clearly able to find someone else, but I'll never be able to find someone that could compare to him. He's ruined me. I'll never be able to go into a relationship with another guy without comparing him to Kai.
I'm tired of this. I'm tired of my food tasting like nothing but the salt of my tears. I'm tired of starting fights with my mother over nothing. I'm tired of going to school and doing nothing.
I'm just tired if hurting.
You have a way of coming easily to me.
And when you take, you take the very best of me.
So I start a fight 'cause I need to feel somethin'
And you do what you want 'cause I'm not what you wanted.
What was I supposed to expect though? He said that we'd be able to work this thing out. That'd we could always be together. I knew that it was going to be hard. Nothing with Kai was every really easy. The relationship wasn't as easy as we made it seem. But every relationship is like that. That's what made it normal. That's what I liked the most about it. The fact that it was my perfect relationship.
But I what I didn't expect was for him to be such a coward and to break up with me like he did. It killed me when I heard it from my mother.
"It seems that Kai has found...someone…else."
That hurt. Like a knife. How could someone do that to someone they claimed to love? I would never do that to anyone, period!
Oh, what a shame.
What a rainy ending given to a perfect day.
Just walk away, no use defending words that you will never say.
And now that I'm sittin' here thinkin' it through, I've never been anywhere cold as you.
I remember when the relationship first started. Not the romantic one, the friendship. He had walls all around his heart and mind. I tried so hard to draw him out! It wasn't that I was trying to become his girlfriend. I just thought that it was unhealthy to be so closed up. But when he did open up, I did fall in love, just like every other girl. Only, I knew the real Kai. That's what hurt the most. I knew him. He knew me. He knew my dreams; he knew everything about me. And I thought that I knew everything about him. I guess I was wrong.
You put up walls and paint them all a shade of gray.
And I stood there lovin' you and WISHED them all away.
And you come away with a great little story of a mess of a dreamer with the nerve to adore you.
The other day I went through all my old photo albums and ripped out all the pictures that have him in them. I burned them all. All excepted one, that is.
It had just me and him. It was the first one that we took as an official couple and the first picture he ever took voluntary. That one I kept. It sat on my dresser. I looked at it everyday before school. Everyday it gets harder not to cry.
It shouldn't be like this. Every says it gets easier, but it's only getting harder. What's wrong with me? Why can't I get over him?
That's it! I can't take it anymore! I'm going to do it!
You never did give a damn thing, honey.
But I cried, cried for you.
And I know you wouldn't have told nobody if I died, died for you.
It's raining out and I keep slipping in the mud. The forest surrounding my house always seemed so scary, but now it's friendly. It's secluded and quiet. Just the perfect place to die.
I took our picture with me. Stared at it, trying to decide if this is the best. All I can think about is the girl he's with and how it should be me. That's enough to make up my mind.
Oh, what a shame.
What a rainy ending given to a perfect day.
So just walk away, no use defending words that you will never say.
And now that I'm sittin' here thinkin' it through, I've never been anywhere cold as you.
I can feel my life slipping away and I almost want to stop it. But this pain can't compare to the pain that I've felt for the past few weeks. I just can't stop it now. I can't give him the satisfaction of knowing that he's better than me.
Oh, what a shame.
What a rainy ending give to a perfect day. Every smile you fake is so condescending.
Counted all the scars you made.
Now that I'm sittin here thinkin' it through, I've never been anywhere cold as you.
It's only a few more minutes now. I keep blacking out. My visions fading and my breath is becoming shorter. It feels great. My heart feels lighter than before.
Guess what, Kai.
I'm finally as cold as you.
Yup, that is that. Wow! I almost cried. It is sad. It's sad that that happens so much. I hope you liked it.