Hitomi wo Tojite; The Reason I Close my Eyes

Eriol Hiiragizawa got down from the cab and thanked the driver. He took a deep breath and looked up at the azure sky. It was late morning and Paris positively vibrated with energy and life, especially in the summer.

It wasn't his first time in Paris but whenever he came here, he was always awed by the beauty of his surroundings. France with its rich and solid history always took his breath away. He'd never got tired in immersing himself in its history, art, music, and people.

Paris was a welcome change from dreary London. The place would've been an ideal vacation spot where he could lose himself in its richness. But he wasn't here for a vacation. His purpose was far more serious than that.

The eighteen-year-old lad sighed softly to himself. His hand reached into his bag to draw out a thick wad of letters bound together by a faded lavender ribbon. Cool sapphire blue eyes stared at it before he untied the ribbon and searched for the latest post.

Apparently he'd have to use it to find a clue that could lead to her.

Eriol stared at the date. February 18. Exactly eight months ago.

The last time she sent a letter to him. He can't help but wonder because she'd always kept regular correspondence, twice every two weeks or more if she wasn't busy. The letter was waiting for him at his home when he came back from visiting his friends in Japan. Six weeks had passed before he could read it.

At first he wasn't at all bothered. She must be busy with her studies, he assured himself. So busy she can't write any more letters. After all, she was already nearing her graduation.

But after that, the letters just stopped.

Eriol was furious he couldn't get away from the work the university unloaded on him so he could go to France to check on her. She was under his responsibility after all; her mother had left her to his care when her only daughter went to France.

He was in England, she was in France but their link to each other was letters. Long and wonderful letters, filled with news and quirky experiences and secret thoughts, kept him smiling all the time as he read through them again. She had a way with words that made them seem like a story and conveyed her messages straight to his heart.

Reading the letters was getting more painful lately. He couldn't get far without wondering and worrying about her. The letters were filled with happy anecdotes and silly musings. No clue leading to their writer's disappearance.

He'd come here to find her. And he had to keep himself to stop thinking about worse things that might have happened…

Eriol shook his head vigorously. He must not give up. She had to be here, somewhere, and he will find her.

If anything happened to her, he will not be able to take it easily.

That's why he had to go on a solo search for the little sister slash best friend he'd ever had.

He hitched his bag and held the letters tightly. If he wanted to find her then it was best that he got moving.

The streets of Paris were familiar to him as he had strolled in them with her whenever he visited. But he wasn't as expert with it as he thought.

Eriol never admitted it to anyone but himself that he couldn't read maps properly.

He was still a long away off from locating her current apartment. She lived in a place with huge old gray buildings that looked cold and deserted but inside was warm and inviting. Her own apartment was decorated tastefully and induced as much warmth as possible.

The task was beginning to look bigger and harder than he thought.

He looked up at the sky that reminded him of her eyes so much and sighed almost audibly.

Tomoyo, wherever you are, I'll come and find you.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

She held up a postcard against the Eiffel Tower and smiled. It was the same picture but she loved to compare it all the same. The postcard couldn't match the magnificence of the Eiffel but it would be enough to bring it to him.

Daidouji Tomoyo giggled as she leaned back and enjoyed the soft breeze. It was a Saturday and she had the day off from studying. But she went to the Eiffel to practice her violin and to write in perfectly serene surroundings.

She picked up her pen and tapped it on her cheek thoughtfully. The postcard itself wasn't enough for her descriptions for that warm day and what happened to her in Philosophy class and the exciting experience of being painted. What should she write first?

The wind loved to play with her luxurious dark hair and she had to tie it into an untidy ponytail to keep it from her face. She'd always loved the wind. It reminded her of him. Sweet, gentle, and soothing was the best qualities she could say about him. Somehow having the wind around lessened the loneliness she felt.

She smiled as she started to write.

"Dear Eriol-kun,

Greetings from the Eiffel Tower! Nah, I was kidding. Thanks to you I learned who made it and why. I'm here and I'm planning to practice the violin. I'm going to have a recital tomorrow so wish me luck. I know, my original love was for singing but the violin is wonderful too. It's a great day out here and very windy too. Nee, do you mind if I think of the wind as you? I'll just imagine that it's Eriol-kun who is comforting me and keeping me company… I'm starting to miss you so…"

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Eriol stopped walking and looked around. The buildings were starting to look the same. He sighed. If he didn't get any directions soon he might be lost in this great city.

One of these buildings has got to be her apartment. The problem was he didn't know which one.

He glanced at the envelope clutched in his right hand. I know Tomoyo, he thought. I have to think.

She used to write her letters by her huge French windows with the lovely curtains fluttering because of the wind. He'd seen her once when she was too absorbed in writing a long letter to him that last summer she spent with him here.

Her long hair was loose and fell in soft waves and framed her pretty face. She was wearing a white dress that further emphasized her creamy skin and blue eyes and dark hair. And in her left wrist was the bracelet he'd given her when they were younger.

Tomoyo always used stationery when writing to him. She had an endless collection of soft pink, pastel blue, and mint green papers. Often she would spray some of her perfume to the papers to add her scent. It was thoughtful really and he'd always cherished the aroma of it whenever he held the papers close to him when he missed her.

She giggled, murmured and looked thoughtful when writing that letter in her special spot under the windows. And he decided not to bother her and went until he was sure.

Eriol was visiting her that summer. He could never forget the feelings of walking, hand in hand, with her on the streets of France. She had brought him to one of the crowded market alleys and made him taste all sorts of delicious but nameless foods. How she had laughed when she herself placed a croissant in his mouth.

He opened his eyes and stared up at the buildings.

On that day he left her, he'd seen her watching him with sad eyes from her apartment window. She looked lonely and his heart cried out to her. But he only smiled bravely and waved to her.

Tomoyo didn't smile. And if Eriol wasn't so blinded by misty tears, he could've sworn there were tears in her eyes too.

Eriol walked away, looking as if he was lost and didn't know what he was looking for. As he strolled underneath the arch, he disturbed some of the pigeons that promptly flew away, taking his optimism with them.

……………………………………………………………………………………………

A/N: As you might've guessed, this is an ExT fic. And yesh, you know I am a procrastinator and have a habit of starting fics without any following chapters. But this was one idea that was too good to miss. I promise to try and follow it up… that is, if I get a good enough reception for it.