Disclaimer- We do not own LotR
Authors- Demus and Mrs Miniver
Gandalf smoked his pipe. Gandalf got lung cancer.
The moral of the story- don't smoke.
Sauron died.
The moral of the story- if you're going to be a large evil eye, don't piss off Aragorn.
Hakdir and Clebhorn were assaulted by a typing error.
The moral of the story- don't let Demus do the typing.
Lurtz entered a beauty competition. Lurtz lost.
The moral of the story- if you're a snarling, disgusting, ugly orc, beauty is in the eye of the beholder (a blind man).
Gimli stole Legolas' shampoo. Gimli died.
The moral of the story- don't mess with a bitch.
Pippin started to choke. Merry performed the Heimlich manoeuvre. Pippin was saved.
The moral of the story- Always have a well-informed hobbit in the vicinity if you feel like a quick choke.
Aragorn got caught in a blender.
The moral of the story- if you're going to cook, tie your hair back.
Bill the Pony and Shadowfax share a romantic candlelit dinner. They fall in love.
The moral of the story- horses can fall in love too.
Saruman attempted to come out without actually telling anyone.
The moral of the story- Gandalf is oblivious to all hints like multi-coloured robes with handbag accessories.
Sarong and Grimy fell victim to the now serial-assaulting typing error.
The moral of the story- don't let Mrs Miniver do the typing either.
Boromir had trouble starting the Horn of Gondor
The moral of the story- in the hands of…well...hormonal teenage girls, euphemisms are dangerous.
Elrond ate a sock.
The moral of the story- socks are funny.
Frodo contracted lung cancer shortly after Spam was assaulted by a now desperate typing error.
The moral of the story- recurring jokes are always good.
Faramir fell on a barbeque.
The moral of the story- in the face of fire, Faramir is a useless wazzock.
Eomer fell off his horse.
The moral of the story- people falling off stuff never gets old.
Legolas was eaten by fangirls.
The moral of the story- elves are finger-lickin' good.
Boromir, Aragorn and Eomer had a threesome.
The moral of the story- fantasies should not be indulged.
Galadriel destroyed the world.
The moral of the story- never underestimate the power of PMS.
The infamous Typing Error was arrested by the longshanks ranger of the north, Strudel.
The moral of the story- the typing error never dies…