Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars, but I do own Damien
A/N: Sorry for the long wait, but I have been busy. This chapter is important in that Visas is in this and she plays an important role. And a brand new character is brought in who has a huge impact on Kala in the long run. A huge thank you to my sister who helped me write exile/visas fluff. Kudos to her.
Chapter 4: Rumors, Revelations, and Cute Guys
15 years earlier
In times of trouble friends will come together seeking answers from one another. It was no exception after Revan left. They had all come to Coruscant to understand the meaning behind Revan's messages. They comforted one another in knowing their friend and leader was gone, and they were all there for Bastila who took it the hardest.
Her problems were many because she blamed herself for him leaving, leaving without saying goodbye. It was easier to get on with life after the weeks Revan left with friends there to help. She began to feel better, they could have left, but something told them to stay. A feeling that things were not over, not everything had been revealed. And so they stayed.
Perhaps the Force was causing them to stay but they were all relieved that they did because Bastila started acting sad again they just had no idea why. She didn't talk much and always seemed to be thinking about something else. When she looked at them she wasn't really seeing them, her mind was elsewhere and they knew it was not good.
She sat at the window knees to her chest, pretending to be staring out over Coruscant. All she could think about was the mess she was in, the trouble her actions had caused. The sadness of knowing what could be.
She heard them whispering about her to each other, arguing over who should talk to her. It looks like Mission was appointed.
"Bastila…what's wrong?"
"What's right?"
"Well," Jolee began, "The sun rose, people are happy, children are playing."
Children, why did he have to say that? "Everything is the same since he left, looking out you would never believe the change." Her voice was sad and melancholy, "People's lives change every day, but no one but them notices, their lives will never be the same. People die, people leave, but it never changes the big picture."
Mission hated riddles, she knew something was wrong and she was determined to get to the bottom of it. "Bastila, you need to stop this, we're your friends and we're here to help you."
"You can't help what's wrong with me, you can't change it."
"You were getting better and now this! You need to tell us what's wrong, you can't do this it's not fair."
Bastila finally looked at them, what Mission said made her a little mad; they didn't even know the truth. "You can't understand Mission; you don't know what is wrong."
"I would if you would just tell me! Why are you doing this to us! What do you think gives you the right to act this way."
"Because I think I'm pregnant okay!"
Mission looked like she had been slapped. All of their eyes widened when they heard Bastila blurt out the truth and things began to make a lot more sense.
"Oh…oh." Mission kept repeating, her outburst at Bastila seeming foolish now.
"Are you sure?" Carth asked.
She shook her head, "I'm not sure of anything."
Juhani spoke up, "Why haven't you made sure?"
"I'm afraid…afraid I'm right."
"A warrior is never afraid." Canderous told her, he had no idea what else to say. He wasn't prepared for a situation like this.
Mission eyed him like he was crazy, "Shut up Canderous you don't know what you're talking about. And besides," She said turning to Bastila, "She has every right to be afraid."
"But we do need to learn the truth." Juhani brought up.
"Well I know a way we can learn right here right now." Jolee said. All eyes turned to him, looking at him like he was crazy. "Oh come on, don't tell me you didn't think of it!"
"We would like to hear it Jolee." Carth said annoyed.
"Well, Revan and Bastila are both Force sensitive, any child of theirs…""Would be Force sensitive too." Bastila finished for him. She was ahead of him. She called upon the Force and felt the presence in the room. She could see her friends' connections to the Force, Canderous, Mission, Carth and Zaalbar being much weaker. Juhani and Jolee being stronger, and she sensed another presence. This presence was small but not weak; in fact its connection seemed to grow every time its heart beat. Her child.
Present Day
I was supposed to be in the cockpit waiting for us to navigate around the planet to the settlement, wherever that was. But my father, was in the back room doing Force knows what. I remembered what my mission objective was; find out if he still loved my mother. And I admit I was curious about what he was saying and what he thought about me. So I snuck out to see what he was doing… and eavesdrop on him.
He was talking to HK, of course he would, he's the only one who can stand the stupid droid.
Statement: Master I am so pleased to be back in your company, the female meat bag has informed me that we are not returning to the Republic.
Exclamation: I do hope you let me kill for you in this war. For sometime I have not been used to my full functions.
Yeah well we weren't about to let that thing kill everything in sight. It was enough having him around and complaining about his lack of use.
"Its okay HK, I'm just glad they kept you running."
Statement: I am too Master. If not I would not have had the opportunity to serve under you again. Following the inferior being worked to my advantage.
Did he just say inferior being? Was he talking about me? I was about ready to jump in their and show that droid just who was the inferior.
"So you followed her? What convinced you to do that?"
Explanation: It was the meatbag Carth that ordered me to follow her. I knew she would lead me to you after I learned of her connection to you.
"Connection?" He asked.
Explanation: Yes Master you are…
He never got to finish because I jumped in there, "You stupid hunk of metal, I'm going to tear your head off and throw it out the air lock!"
I was rushing over to the droid ready to start some demolitions but my father was holding me back. "I ordered you not to tell him anything!"
I was certain if the droid could smirk he would have, he seemed smug.
Proud Explanation: You pitiful meatbag, I knew you would be swayed by me calling you my mistress. I have only one Master and I only obey orders from him.
"I'm going to kill you!"
"Okay just calm down, there is not going to be massacres on this ship." He told us both; I was still glaring at the droid.
"HK if she doesn't want me to know something its ok, don't tell me what ever it is she told you."
Resignation: Yes master. HK left the room leaving me alone with my father.
"I hate that stupid droid, why did you even build him?"
"For amusement, its kind of fun to annoy people with him." He told me laughing.
"Yeah well he drives me crazy." I sat down in a huff and he sat down beside me.
"HK said you had secrets…about me." How much had that droid said?
I played it cool, "Everyone has secrets even you, maybe I'll tell you them but right now I don't even know you."
His eyes narrowed, "You seem to know a lot about me."
"Yes, but I don't know if you can keep secrets, if you are ready to hear mine."
He still looked at me weird, "What?" I asked.
"You're smart, you're different then what I first thought of you." He told me.
"It's because of who my parents are; it's because of who my mother is." Oh no, had I said too much?
"Who is your mother?" He asked me.
The Force must have been looking out for me because there was a beeping sound informing us we were near the settlement.
After leaving the Ebon Hawk at the hangar bay, we had to take a speeder to where his men were staying. The camp was set up like a military camp and here I was the only girl I could see there, and by the looks of it they hadn't seen many girls lately.
"Look I don't have to time to train you myself," He explained.
"Train me? I don't need to be trained I already know the ways of the Force."
"Yes but you need to be taught the styles of the Sith and how to defeat them, you got into a mess back there and we can't let that happen again."
"Hey," I told him, "I killed two!
"So what?"
"Okay." Was all I could say, "So who is going to train me."
"I contacted Visas…" He began.
"Visas! Visas Marr! She is going to train me!"
He looked wary, "Yes…"
"Oh my, this is so, so I don't even know what to say, I mean after the Exile left and then came back for her no one knew what happened." I was talking so fast I wasn't even sure I knew what I was saying but I did slow down to ask, "What did happen to her?"
"She got married." Said a voice behind me, I turned around to see Visas…a very pregnant Visas.
All I did was stare, this was the woman who had faced Nahilus along with the Exile. And all I could do was stare at her with my mouth open like a fish; I really wished someone would just shoot me.
"Is something wrong?" She asked me.
"No it's just…I never thought…never."
Revan interrupted, "Why don't you stay out here Kala while I talk to Visas."
"Ok." I told him, wondering what they were going to talk about, and were they going to talk about me?
"Her name is Kala?" Visas asked him, once Kala was out of ear shot.
"Yes, Kala Nash, is there a problem with that?"
"No, just wondering." She told him but, she was thinking, could it be possible?
"Where is she from?"
"The Republic, she mentioned Telos, she may live their."
Visas nodded as she absorbed the information.
Revan stared at her, confused about the questions she was asking, "She's fifteen if you want to know."
"Fifteen," She repeated, "Did she mention any family."
"Yes, she said her mother was a Jedi who left the Order."
"Did she mention her father?"
"Yes but she didn't finish her thought, I got the feeling it wasn't something she liked to talk about."
Visas didn't say anything, just stood their lost in thought.
"Visas?" He asked her, bringing her back to reality.
"Yes?" She said as people do when they are dragged from their thoughts, "You brought me here wishing to train her."
"Yes, she has been trained to use a saber but has obviously never fought in a life or death situation before. She needs to be taught how to counter act the Sith maneuvers."
"Of course, I shall do so."
Revan sighed, and Visas smiled, "She seems very…enthusiastic."
Revan shook his head, "I don't know if she is just a fan of mine or a stalker."
"What do you mean?"
"She knows so much about me, it almost scary. You know she came here intent to bring me back to the Republic."
"Perhaps she has motive that you cannot see." Visas told him, "But I must speak to her since I will train her."
I was poking around the equipment outside of my father's tent, when Visas came out. I whipped around, "I wasn't doing anything." I told her, not exactly the truth but close enough.
"Come Kala, I want to talk to you now that I am going to train you."
We walked for a little bit until we reached a large rock in the camp and I helped her sit down which was a struggle from her since she was quite large from pregnancy.
"Revan has told me to train you in the ways to fight the Sith."
"I don't understand," I said, "I already know how to fight."
"Yes, but fighting a Sith is different then fighting someone who has no wish to kill you."
"But I killed two!"
"That doesn't matter out here, for most people here, killing Sith is a means of survival, and I understand that you were almost killed by a third one. We need to teach you how to avoid that."
"Ok," I relented, "What do I have to do?"
"We are going to teach you how to defend yourself. You were taught by your mother, who has a gentle hand. Besides," She said looking at me, "Bastila Shan had only just been knighted when she left the Order."
If she had grabbed a saber and held it to my throat I wouldn't be more surprised. How did she know? How did she guess? More importantly, what would she do?
"How…When…Wwhat makes you think Bastila Shan is my mother." I tried a fake laugh, found out I'm not very good at them, "I mean…that's just crazy." Why am I such a bad liar?
"You needn't lie Kala, I know the truth. Besides, Nash is a terrible anagram for Shan."
I sighed, "How did you…"
"How did I find out?" I nodded, "You may not believe this but you are not as well hidden as you think, there are rumors of a child. But I found out differently."
Ten years earlier
Visas lay on the bed in her borrowed rooms on Telos Citadel Station staring at the ceiling. What more was there to do? He was gone. Jarren had taken the Ebon Hawk and left for the Unknown Regions alone. Tears stung at her blind eyes, but she stubbornly wiped them away, Tears would not bring back her love.
With a sigh she climbed up from her bed and walked over to her balcony overlooking the streets not far below. Her gaze drifted to the stars, as if she were hoping to see him return.
She heard voices coming from below. Her eyes focused on three figures, one she recognized, and two who were strangers.
"You should have let me go with him," The woman said her voice tinged with frustration and…pain.
"Jarren wouldn't have allowed it," One of the men said.
"You should have made him!"
"Bastila, you know you can't go."
Bastila! The woman was Bastila Shan.
"I don't care, Carth," Bastila said, "I need to find him."
"Even a warrior knows when to follow the orders of a superior," The familiar voice of Malachor said.
"I've waited for four years, Canderous," Bastila said, "I can't wait any longer. He has to know…Revan has to know about…" She broke up in small sobs before she could finish her sentence.
Carth put a hand on her shoulder, "I'm not going to allow Kala to lose both of her parents."
Kala? Who was Kala?
"Mommy!" A little voice cried. Visas saw a little girl followed closely by a blue Twi'leck female. Bastila opened her arms, and Visas suspected that she was smiling. The girl jumped into her embrace.
"Hey," Bastila said, "You were so good during the attack. Look who's here."
"Candy!" The girl cried happily as she wiggled out of her mother's arms to run to the Mandalorian.
Bastila smiled as she watched Kala play with the warrior. Visas nearly laughed at the tenderness the great Malachor was showing to the girl.
"Could you really leave her behind?" Carth asked Bastila.
She shook her head, "No, I couldn't." Bastila looked at her daughter with a sad smile, her last and only remaining connection to Revan.
Visas left the balcony and sank down onto the bed again. Bastila was lucky; she had something to remember her love by; all she had were memories. Tears stung her eyes again; this time she had no will to wipe them away.
1 year later
In the Unknown Regions Jarren Shaye- The Exile- was lost deep in thought. He didn't see the flying datapad, until it was an inch away from his face. He ducked down on reflex, but the pad stopped an inch over his head.
Jarren glared at the person laughing like a maniac, "That's not funny Revan."
Revan, hero of the Republic, smiled, "But it pulled you back into this galaxy." Revan pulled the datapad back into his hand using the Force, and sat down next to his friend, "You've been doing that a lot lately."
Jarren sighed, "I know it's just I can't stop thinking about her."
"I know what its like," Revan said.
"Look, I can't do this Revan," Jarren said, "I miss Visas so much, I need to bring her here."
Revan was a little stunned, "Are you sure you want to do that?"
"Yes," Jarren said, "I love her."
"Well if that's what you want to do," Revan replied, "Then go find her."
"Thanks," Jarren said, "You know you can come with me. I'm sure…"
"No," Revan cut him off, "My place is here."
Jarren nodded a little, "If that's what you want. I'll be back soon, and I won't be alone."
"Go already," Revan said, "You've talked about this Visas so much, I'm dying to meet her now go."
It had been a year since Jarren left, and Visas had spent that time on her destroyed world of Katarr. She was able to make peace with her shattered home, but her heart remained alone, and in pain.
Visas chose to stay on Coruscant, but even in a city of so many, she was still lonely.
At the small Inn she was staying at, Visas enjoyed listening to the chatter between the other guests and the owners.
"…But Gervan was just so stubborn, he refused to pay at full price…"
"Here's your bill, miss," A young girl serving as a waitress said.
"Thank you," Visas said pulling out the credits. While she did the lightsaber clipped to her belt was exposed.
The girls eyes widened at the sight, "Are you a Jedi!"
Every eye turned to her, "Umm, sort of."
"Did you travel on the Ebon Hawk?"
"Yes," Visas answered, her eyes gazing at the door, willing to escape.
"Were you with Revan?"
"No I have never met him."
"Oh, Revan, now he's a bad one," The hotel owner said as she sat with her friend.
"I'm sorry, I don't understand," Visas said, "Revan saved the Republic."
"After he nearly destroyed it," The woman said, "Oh sure he went good, but look what'd happened to us now. Look what he did to poor Bastila."
"You know when I heard about their story," The owner's friend said, "I told my husband; 'Now those two are going to stay together' I was so disappointed when he left."
"Well she's not alone, at least," The owner said.
"What?" Visas asked.
"Well rumor has it that Bastila had child right after Revan left, and that means that he's the father," The other woman said.
"She's better off on her own. Revan probably ran off and joined those wicked Sith again. I'll bet that Exile joined him as well."
"Jarren would never join the Sith," Visas replied angrily, "He saved us from them."
"What do you know about him?"
"Much more than you think," Visas said, "He and Revan left to fight the true Sith beyond the Outer Rim; to keep them away from the Republic. To save people like you.
"Who are you?" The owner asked
"Visas Marr," She said simply as she left the table.
"Mama," The girl whispered to the hotel owner, "she's the Exile's love."
"The one he left behind."
Visas took a lift to the streets of Coruscant. She wanted to take a walk to work off her anger. It has hurt to hear those people accuse Jarren of being a Sith. He had always been strong for her, never giving into the Dark Side. A year before, She never would have stood up for anyone; she would have sat their trying not to listen. She had changed, Jarren had changed her.
She leaned up against the side of a building, and shut her eyes; it was so hard to walk this path alone. All she wanted was to hear his voice again.
"I've been combing half this galaxy looking for you."
Visas' eyes flew open. Standing in front of her was Jarren. She slowly shook her head, her lips forming the word no, but she was without a voice.
With a smile he nodded. "I'm here."
She ran to him and brushed his cheeks with her fingers, "You're not a dream; you're real."
"I had to see you again," Jarren said, "I was going crazy without you."
"I missed you so much," She said and tears of joy formed at the corners of her eyes, "I was afraid that I would never see you again."
"I want you to come with me," Jarren said, "I need you Visas."
"I need you to," She said, "I don't want to lose you again."
He smiled, "You won't ever have to."
Jarren pulled her closer until their lips met for a long, sweet kiss. They were finally together again.
I sat their staring at this woman, who had known my identity for over ten years; I couldn't believe she would keep a secret like this for so long.
"Why?" I asked, "Why did you do it? Why didn't you tell him?"
She smiled at me, "It wasn't my place, it is your mother's and now I suspect yours."
"I can't," I told her, "Not yet, I don't know him, I don't know how he would react, how he feels about my mom, I just can't."
She nodded as if she understood, "But you must, the longer you wait the worse things will get."
I pondered over what she said, it could get worse? I wondered how, was she talking about him reacting to the truth, or is he starting to fall out of love with my mom. All I could do was hope that was not true.
But the sound of a child knocked me out of my thought.
A little boy with a cherubic face and tousled brown hair came running up to us, I turned to see Visas smiling and I knew this was her son.
"Pedric what are you doing here?" She asked.
"I came to see your new apprentice!" He said excitedly and then turned to look at me. I smiled at him
"Your very pretty." He told me. I was a bit surprised by that comment.
"Thank you." I told him unsure where he was going.
"Will you marry me?" He asked and Visas burst out laughing.
I just smiled, "I think I'm a little old for you." I told him.
"I agree," Another voice spoke; I turned and saw Jarren Shaye, the exile.
"Hey, sorry about that, Revan told us about your new trainee and he is so fast you know." The two parents laughed, I just watched them and wondered if this was how my parents would act.
"So you must be Kala." Jarren said. I nodded not knowing what else to say.
"Well welcome to the war, I can guarantee you are going to be a popular addition."
"Um ok," I stuttered out.
"Well it is nice to meet you Kala, and I better take this little guy away." He said pointedly at his son.
"Pick me up." The little boy begged. Jarren grinned and complied, the boy laughed as he was carried on his father's shoulders.
I watched them leave and a wave of sadness came over me. I had never had that; I had never been able to rush into my father's arms. Never called out daddy and never, been able to beg him to pick me up.
I felt a feeling of hopelessness, what was I thinking I would accomplish coming out here? Why should he even believe me?
Visas put a hand on my arm, "Its ok," she told me.
She must have seen my sad look; I smiled sadly, "I hope so."
"Well," She began, "I'm supposed to train you and so I shall. But obviously I cannot spar with you, so you must come with me."
Now I was very confused, "Where are we going?"
"I'm going to introduce you to someone who should help us." was all she said.
We walked back into camp but we didn't stop until we came across a boy probably a few years older than me, with his back to us.
"Damien, I want you to meet Kala." Visas told him and then he turned around.
Now I am a typical teenager, and I have typical teen age crushes, mostly on the guys from my favorite holovids. But I had never met the guy of my dreams until today.
He had the bad boy look that made me melt, black hair dark eyes, all around gorgeous. And of course being me, all I could do was stare at him with my mouth open. Making a complete fool of myself again.
"Hi," He said. He spoke to me!
I didn't speak, I blushed instead. He stared at me strangely as if wondering if I could speak. Visas was looking at me too.
"Well Damien," She began, "I was hoping you could help with Kala's training, I know you would help a great deal."
He smiled at me, "Sure, I'd love too."
"Thank you." Visas told him.
He still smiled at me, "See you around."
He walked away; I turned my head to watch him leave.
It must have been obvious that I was checking him out, because when I turned around Visas was smirking at me.
"What?" I asked her.
"You handled that well, maybe next time you'll actually speak."
A/N: How did you like it, I hope it wasn't confusing with all the flashbacks. R&R