"I'm so sorry." she sobbed as she looked into Heero's eyes. "Duo's in the hospital, they don't know if he's going to make it."
*Two Hours Later*
Heero sat in the dimly lit room, acutely aware of his surroundings. It almost appeared that time had taken a giant leap backward. The sounds that surrounded him remained the same. The rhythmic hiss and beep of various instruments, the appearance of familar nurses. Duo himself seemed to revert back to the day he had arrived to the hospital. He laid there lifelessly on the small bed, various tubes and cords attached to his body. His skin was pale, and as Heero reached to touch his hand, he was surprised by the warmth that radiated from it.
"He's dead," he whispered into the silence, parting the limp fingers in his grasp. Not once did Duo respond to his touch, no indications of life at all. The machines were lying to him--Duo wasn't breathing, the machines were. The body on the bed was not the Duo he knew, and it hurt. "Duo's gone."
He felt a hand clamp on his shoulder, but he did not acknowledge the owner. It did not matter anymore. "Heero, he is alive."
"You lie." he spat as he felt the now familiar sensation erupt from inside him. Not caring, he allowed the feeling to spill over, and the tears immediately fell.
"Duo's in a coma, Heero." the voice urged, pulling him into a hug. Soothing sounds were heard, and he relaxed under the soft tune. Memories of a woman holding him as a child flashed across his mind, and he felt comfort among all of the pain that surrounded him. "He'll wake up soon."
"Dr. Beacon said that it is his body's way of recovering from the stress of the surgery." Quatre explained from the other side of the room, his head resting lightly on Trowa's shoulder. Heero hid in the sanctuary of Relena's arms like a small child, his hand still holding Duo's.
"Will he be ok?" Trowa asked Quatre. The blond pilot was exhausted and withdrawn from this week's events.
"I can't read him, he's feeling a lot of things right now." he answered. "He's strong, I have faith that he'll pull through."
"And Duo?"
"Same thing." He replied as he stood to walk over to the foot of Duo's bed.
"It's time to go." Wufei said suddenly from the edge of the doorway, his eyes averted to the hallway.
"What?" Relena asked.
"We have to leave. There are missions that we have left unfinished."
Trowa and Quatre nodded and began to walk out of the room.
"What about Duo? Aren't you worried about him?" Relena asked Heero's retreating form.
"We can't be concerned with him now," Heero murmured, his voice lifeless and dull. "The doctors will tend to him now."
"No, no, you're not going back!" Relena said almost desperately, reaching out for Heero's arm. She turned to the other three pilots standing at the door. "Why must you go in the first place? Just stop this madness before it destroys you all!"
"We have no choice," Wufei countered irritably, "the longer we stay here and wait for Duo to recover, the easier it gets for the Earth to tighten their control of our colonies. Why should we be concerned about one little life when thousands of lives depend on us being there?"
"Who are you to decide who lives and dies? You shouldn't be killing at all!"
"It is not for me to decide! They brought this on themselves! Do you think I enjoy this, Miss Peacecraft? I used to believe in the fairy-tale called pacifism, but it's just a bunch of childish nonsense."
"Don't take that tone with me! If you want to know how I feel-"
"SHUT UP!!" Quatre shouted, dropping to the floor. He clutched his hands to his chest and began to sob. "No, please. . . "
"Quatre?"
"I can't take anymore, so tired, I'm so tired of this." he murmured, his voice almost identical to the pilot lying on the hospital bed. The room fell silent as Quatre muttered incoherently to himself.
"What is he. . .?" Relena began to ask when Heero suddenly moved.
"It's Duo." He said, rushing to Quatre's side to glance quickly at the machine monitoring Duo's heart. The number began to decrease steadily.
"He can hear us." Quatre said weakly, his own voice also fading. "He's sorry for all the trouble he's caused-"
"Duo wants to leave." Heero said.
"Talk to him," Quatre whispered before erupting into a series of coughs. "He's not listening to me. If anything he's mad that I won't let him go."
Trowa pushed Heero aside to feel Quatre's pulse. It was as weak as Duo's.
"We don't have much time." Trowa stated to Heero.
"I don't know what to say."
"It doesn't matter, just say something!" Quatre hissed between clenched teeth. Trowa helped him to his feet and assisted the blond pilot to stand by Duo's bed. Heero nodded before walking over to grip Duo's hand.
"Duo, it's Heero." he whispered. "We're not mad at you, just worried. You have to come back, Deathscythe's starting to miss you."
"Yeah," Wufei added from the doorway, "don't worry about a thing, work on getting better."
Relena watched as the four Gundam pilots surrounded Duo's bed and began to talk to him. She watched as they each had something to say to their fallen comrade, how they truly cared for his well being. It was the first time that she had seen them work as a team, and not on their own. Suddenly, Quatre exhaled and went limp. Trowa was ready to catch him, and he ushered him to a chair.
"Quatre!" Relena gasped.
"He's fine." Trowa stated after a few agonizing seconds. "They both are."
"I just need a moment to rest." the blond pilot rasped as he sunk deeper into the chair. Wufei and Heero kept their vigil at Duo's bedside, both noting the improvement of Duo's pulse.
"Let's go." Wufei finally stated thirty minutes later. Dr. Beacon had been in to examine Duo, and her prognosis was reassuring. Now that the pilots knew that there was nothing left for them to do, they had no choice but to leave. They had a job to complete.
The Chinese Gundam pilot turned his head toward Relena's direction, challenging her to object. She held his gaze for a moment, but eventually allowed him to win. No matter how she felt about this war, she realized that they were beyond her control. They fought to control the future on their own. Somehow, they banded together when they learned they could not. She respected that.
"Relena, watch over him for me." Heero stated from the doorway. Before she could answer, the four pilots were gone. Turning her attention to the form in the bed, she smiled. To her, he was a stranger. No knowledge of his past, his personality, or his convictions; but that did not matter. This pilot had found a way into Heero's heart. This was the pilot Heero loved.
"I guess it's you and me for awhile, huh?" she whispered. "I hope we can be friends."
*****************************************************************
*TWO WEEKS LATER*
"Hey Duo, how are you feeling?" Relena asked as she entered Duo's room, her arms filled with bags. "I brought some mangas from Hilde and a new plant for the room."
She began to place the items about the room, continuing to talk to Duo. He remained silent, but she wasn't expecting much from him today. She was pleased to see less and less of the tubes and machines each day.
"I heard from Heero today. He's doing fine." she said, placing the small potted plant on Duo's bed stand. His still form ignored her as usual, but she continued chatting.
"Can I ask you something? I know we can't really be considered friends and all, but I have to know. Do you care for Heero? I mean, do you love him?" she asked as she turned to grab the styrofoam pitcher to water the various plants she had scattered among the room. She heard Duo's voice from behind her. It was slurred and weak; it could barely be interpeted as a whisper.
"Heeeerrrroooo. . ."
Relena grinned, but didn't deter from her task of watering the plants. She knew well enough not to get her hopes up for every sound that comes from Duo's bed--at least not yet. The first time Duo had said something, she ran to the nurses' station in joyful tears. She only came to learn that his condition was still the same. He wasn't awake, and he wouldn't be for some time.
"But I heard him!" she had protested, but the nurse only smiled.
"I bet you did." the woman said. "Duo's still gone, but at least we know he's on his way back."
She had later learned that Duo was in the waking stages of a coma. Sometimes it took days, even weeks to fully gain consciousness.
Finishing the task at hand, Relena returned to Duo's bed.
"I shouldn't be telling you all this," she whispered, "but he's fallen in love with you. No surprise, really. You were his first friend, and you helped pull him out of his shell somehow. I have to thank you for that. Don't worry, I'm not jealous or anything; but if you hurt him I'll have to break my vow and kill you."
"Kill?" he softly repeated. She smiled warmly and kissed his forehead.
"They say you'll be awake soon. Isn't that great? I have to go away on business, but when I come back, you better be awake so that we can have a civilized conversation."
"Pffffftttt."
*****************************
*Two Days Later*
Pain. Duo was surrounded by it. He tried to lift his arm to block the intense white that exploded into patterns of the rainbow. He blinked, wondering why, he thought of pain in colors.
"It'll just be another second, Duo." a soft voice cooed. "Can you follow the light for me?"
"Follow it?" his mind screamed angrily, but he found it difficult to speak. Somehow, a slurred verison of his thought mangaged to emit from his throat. The woman chuckled, and then the light was gone.
"Don't worry about it, you're doing fine." she said. "Do you know who I am?"
Duo blinked, waiting for the colorful stars to fade. "Mav-Mavis." he rasped, suddenly realizing how thirsty he really was. As if on cue, a straw was placed between his lips. He drank the cool water before directing his attention to the ceiling. Dr. Beacon began to ask him a series of questions, most of which he found difficult to answer. It frustrated him, he knew he should know it, but it was like his memory was still waking up. His head ached, his arms felt like at ton of lead, and he felt the most annoying tingling sensation at the base of his right foot. The sensation was worse on his left leg.
"I can't concentrate," he grumbled. He winced at the slurred sound of his voice.
"You're doing great Duo," she said.
"The pins and needles are bugging me."
"Pins and needles?"
"You know when you sit still for a long time and you leg falls asleep? Then you stand up and the blood falls down and it feels like hot pins and needles running up and down your leg."
"Duo-"
"Up and down, all around-"
"Where are the pins?"
"A little on my right foot, my whole left leg. How long have I been out of it? Man, Quatre must've freaked and sent me here during a nap or something. No, I was in the middle of a fight with someone. Hah! He probably knocked me out again." Duo rambled on as Dr. Beacon reached to the end of the bed. She took the tip of her pin against the ball of his foot. "He has a habit of doing that-ow! Why'd you do that?"
"Your legs are waking up," she gasped.
"That's nice," Duo yawned before drifting off to sleep.
*****************************
*One Month Later*
"No more." Duo groaned as he pulled his sheet over his face.
"Come on, your brain's been on vacation. We have to make sure it's fully awake." Hilde scolded, grabbing the pillow and hit him with it.
"But," he whined, "flashcards?"
Hilde grinned. "Doctor's orders."
"My brain's fine. I've read those flashcards front to back, upside down, and in five different languages!" he complained. "Now what about the rest of my body?"
"They want your back to heal more." Hilde said calmly. Duo sighed and looked at the ceiling. He was still unable to move due to the massive brace that was strapped to his entire back. The foam brace around his neck made the slightest motion difficult.
"But Hilde, my body's waking up!" he pleaded. "Lying here is just going to put it back to sleep again."
"Duo," Hilde sighed, knowing what he was going to say next.
"I can't wait to be on my own two feet again." he mused.
"Duo-" she started, only to be ignored as Duo began to list out his plans after his release from the hospital. The more optimistic he became, the more pessimistic his actual outlook seemed.
"Granted it'll be months from now, but-"
"Duo!" she snapped before bursting into tears.
"I'm sorry." he murmured.
"No, don't." she said, sniffling. "It's just that. . . I'm afraid that you're getting your hopes up. We don't know if this 'feeling' your having is permanent. You still can't even wiggle your toes."
"That was last week." Duo grinned, wiggling his left foot. Hilde giggled through her tears. Duo smiled and placed his hand on her arm. "I still have to try."
"Sorry about the burst of emotion." she apologized.
"Eh," Duo shrugged as the phone rang. Hilde picked it up and placed it by Duo's ear. "Hey, Relena! How's Sanq?"
"Things are doing well here. I wish I could visit you."
"Don't worry. Hilde's taking good care of me." Duo said as he watched Hilde walk in the direction of the bathroom. "Heard from Heero lately?"
"Nothing yet, sorry."
**************************************************
*3 weeks later*
Mavis Beacon walked warily to her office. Entering the small room, she didn't bother with the lights. Lying down on the soft, leather couch in the corner of the room, she closed her eyes. She let her mind wander, knowing deep down sleep would not be possible until the end of her shift.
"Dr. Beacon." a deep voice invaded her mind. Jumping, she scrambled from the couch to turn on the desk lamp while reaching for her sharp letter opener.
"Heero!" she exclaimed, dropping the opener and sat behind her desk. "You scared me."
"How is Duo?" he asked.
"He's resting." she informed him as she tossed Duo's medical records in his direction. He opened the file and began to read as if he was another doctor himself. "I've never seen someone work as hard as Duo has." she continued. Heero had been visiting periodically during the past few months, mostly for minutes at a time. He'd learn of Duo's status and disappear, Mavis was pretty accustomed to that now. "It's been his second week in Physical Therapy and he can walk with assistance. That usually takes months, even years to accomplish."
"Hn." he grunted, handing the folder to her. "When can he be released?"
"Tomorrow." she said, leaning back in her chair. "He'll be staying with his friend Hilde for the remainder of his therapy sessions. Would you like her address?"
"No." he stated and began to walk out of the room. "We will meet again."
************************************************
"Can you make it inside?" Hilde asked as she pulled Duo's bags from the "borrowed" van.
"Yeah, yeah." Duo mumbled as he slowly made his way out of the van. Leaning heavily on the walker given to him, he ambled over to walkway, those few steps virtually draining all of his energy. "Man, I can't wait to get rid of this thing."
"Don't go overdoing it." Hilde warned as she unfolded his wheelchair from the trunk and put Duo in it. "You may end up back in the hospital. Or worse, in this chair permanently."
"Mavis says I have to practice." Duo pouted as Hilde pushed the chair up the makeshift ramp.
"And not to wear yourself thin." she scolded through laughter. "Duo, I've been thinking. When you regain full use of your legs, are you going to pilot Deathscythe again?"
"I hope so." he answered quietly. "I thought about that a lot. For every reason for me not to fight, there are two more reasons why I should. It's easy to give up, but it takes a lot of strength not to."
"Aren't you afraid?" she asked, squeezing his shoulder. "I am."
"I'd rather live than live in fear." he said softly. "Fear is the hardest thing to control, but it's the only emotion that we don't need."
"And who taught you that?"
"No one." Duo shrugged. "I just know someone who has lived without fear most of his life and he seemed fine until I went and had to scare him."
"You taught him other emotions too."
"Yeah, didn't mean to though. Now he's probably a big softie."
"I wouldn't say that." Hilde trailed off as she lead him into the kitchen. Heero was sitting at the kitchen table. "But pretty close."
"What are you doing here?"
"Who? Him? That's just your new physical therapist." Hilde said, "Don't mess with him much, I got shot at twice since he moved in here."
"How long ago was that?"
"Yesterday." Heero said. He stared at the wheelchair and glared at Hilde. She smiled and ducked out of the room. "I thought you can walk."
"I can when she's not in the room." Duo said, smiling. "Help me up."
Heero walked over and extended both of his arms. Duo reached for them and unsteadily stood up. Heero began to walk backward, and Duo followed. Duo watched his own legs in facsination, he still found it hard to believe anything. He now took everything face value, putting the past far behind him. Looking up to grin at Heero's face, Duo was greeted to the sight of tears running down his friend's face.
"It's funny," Heero said. "I'm happy yet I'm able to cry. Emotions are so inconsistant."
"I know." Duo chuckled, reaching to wipe a tear away. Heero caught Duo's wrist so that his hand remained at his cheek.
"Since I'm not good with emotions I guess you should know that I'm scared to tell you that I love you, at least I think that's what it is."
Duo blinked. "Hmm. . . you think, that I-um, you think?"
"I'm being honest." he said.
"Now I get it!" Duo exclaimed, and after a little manuvering produced a over-creased scrap of paper from his pocket. "When I got this letter at the hospital, I just couldn't make heads or tails of it. It just wasn't something that you would do, you know? But I kept it anyway, I always wanted to ask you why, but I don't have to now.
"Unless you want to do the whole sappy 'I like you', 'Do you like me?' thing?" Duo asked, a devilish grin on his face. "Then it would follow with: 'Yes! I love you!', 'You do?', 'I'm not worthy, you could do better. Like, with a girl' mess. Then we'd pine for each other so Quatre or Hilde can play matchmaker and so on, and so on."
Heero laughed as Duo continued on his melodramatic take of romance before quickly kissing Duo on the cheek.
"You see? Wasn't that easy?" Duo mused, returning the kiss.
"No." Heero joked as he took the letter from Duo's hand. Unfolding the letter, he read it. "I wrote this?"
"You don't remember?" Duo asked as he pretended to be hurt.
"I do. I do . . .but was I acting this weird?"
"You still are." Duo laughed as he wrapped his arms around Heero's waist.
"The letter was to be taken literally." he instructed, tossing the paper in the direction of the table.
"I know. I'm still not sure if that is a good thing or bad thing."
Duo laughed. "So what do we do about it then?"
"I don't know."
"Well, for starters," Duo started before falling forward into Heero's arms. "I need a chair."
Heero picked Duo up and gently placed him back into his wheelchair. Before Heero could stand, Duo whispered, "I think I love you too."
Later that evening, while Hilde was cleaning the room, she noted a piece of paper underneath the table. Grinning, she picked it up and read it.
"Get well, love Heero."
**********************************************
*Some time later*
Heero sat at his console as he read the various readouts on the screen. He had grown accustomed to his new job after the war, monitoring the current politicians and military leaders. The current data was not promising, and he knew what had to be done.
"It's Christmas, still working?" Duo taunted as he leaned against the doorway. Easily gliding toward Heero's direction, he casually drapped and arm around Heero and peered over his shoulder. Heero began to relay what he found before grabbing his jacket and walking out of the room.
"Where are you going?" Duo asked. He knew the second he had returned from space with Quatre that Heero had returned to his old habits as a solider, and he knew better not to stop him.
"Relena's been kidnapped." Heero informed from the doorway before running in the direction of the loading bay.
"Anything for the one you love." Heero heard Duo's comment echo down the hallway. Heero guessed that Duo was still sore from the near kiss he had almost shared with Relena. Spinning on his heel, he ran back into the room and grabbed Duo by the arm. "I need you."
"So, we in this together?" Duo asked, firmly planting his feet on the floor, a sly smile on his face. Heero nodded as Duo pulled him close so that their faces were only inches apart. Brushing his lips lightly across Heero's, Duo grinned. "Let's go."
Author's Note/Apology:
I'm so, so sorry it took so long (8 months, eep) to finish this! Well, this is the slap dash ending to Control. I'm sorry if it sucks (I'm a bit disappointed with it myself). It is not how I intended it to end, I was going to have it more drawn out and angsty, but I thought that it would be best to just end it and move on to brighter things. I left a lot of questions unanswered, so for now I'm leaving that up to the reader to decide. I may eventually write a follow up to it, or a full-scale rewrite, but only time will tell. I must say, not too shabby for my first GW fic, huh? Looking back at this fic now, you can obviously tell my only knowledge of GW was through the Internet. What can I say, I learned about GW in college and we didn't have the Cartoon Network. I apologize for the characterization errors, grammar errors, etc. Comparing this to my newer stories and you can really tell the difference. Please! Review, and let me know what you think. *HUG* ~Anthy