Warning! This is slash, and it is not a happy story, but it does get happier at the end.

Disclaimer: I own everything!Except Sirius, Remus, and the entire Harry Potter universe, that is.

"Remus? You all right, mate?" Sirius asked, as he approached his friend from the other side of the dormitory. He'd just come back from Quidditch practice, and was preparing to run down to the kitchens for some food when he'd heard someone crying in the dorm. He knew James was still on the Quidditch pitch, and Peter had detention, so it had to be Remus who was sobbing from somewhere in their room. The only answer Sirius got to his question was another soft sob from Remus' bed.

Sighing, Sirius dropped his equipment on his bed, before walking over to Remus' four-poster and pulling aside the curtains that were hiding his friend. He was slightly shocked to see the sandy-haired Gryffindor sitting there curled up in a slightly fetal position, as if trying to ward off all the evils of the world. "Remus, look at me. What's wrong?" He asked, moving to sit next to him.

As he started to calm down, Remus looked at his friend. "My birthday's coming up next week." That was all he said.

Sirius was confused. He knew Remus' birthday was a few days away, but why would he cry because of that? "I know it's almost your birthday. Most people would be happy about that. What's wrong?"

Remus sighed resignedly as he sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. "I hate my birthdays. I have ever since second year, in case you haven't noticed."

"Well, I did notice that you never seemed as excited as most people do. What happened to make you hate your birthday so much?" Sirius asked, looking at his friend in concern.

"I'd really rather not talk about it," Remus said as he put his head in his hands.

"Remus, you made me talk about the terrible time I have with my family, and it made me feel much better, remember? So, why don't you just tell me what's wrong?" Sirius asked. "I promise not to tell anyone, if you don't want me too."

Remus sighed sadly but nodded. "All right. I'll tell you, just so long as you promise to never mention this to anyone. Not even James or Peter."

"I promise." Sirius said as he settled down to listen to his friend's story.

"Well, like I said, it's something that happened in second year," Remus said as he moved to lean back against his bed. "A few days before my birthday that year, I got an owl saying that my grandmother had died. She'd been really sick for a while, so it really wasn't much of a surprise. Anyway, my brother, Romulus and I were both told that we had to come home for the funeral, which was to be the same day as my birthday."

"I remember now. Is that what's bothering you so much? That you're grandmother was buried on your birthday?" Sirius asked, pushing a few stray strands of black hair out of his face.

Remus shook his head. "No. I wasn't particularly happy about that, but I would be fine if that's all that had happened on that day. Anyway, Romulus and I went home a few days early to help my dad with the arrangements. Everything was fine until the day of the funeral…"

Flashback

A now thirteen-year-old Remus Lupin sat in silence beside his fourteen-year-old brother, Romulus, as they watched their grandmother, Serena Lupin's coffin being placed in the ground. They were in a large cemetery, with trees all around, and the day was deceptively sunny. Remus honestly didn't know how to feel. He hadn't really liked his grandmother all that much, mainly because she'd had a tendency to go on and on about how perfect and wonderful Romulus was, and how proud she was that he'd gotten into Ravenclaw. She'd always made it seem as if Romulus could do no wrong, while Remus was nothing but a little freak, almost as if she was embarrassed that he was even related to her. Regardless, he'd never wanted her to die. Add that to the fact that his brother had been acting really oddly to him lately, and what you got was a very confused and somewhat disturbed boy.

"Come on, boys. We'd better go, we've got to get back to the house before the guests get there," Remus' father, Patrick Lupin said to the two boys, as the guests began to leave the cemetery. Remus' mother, Catherine, had died when he was only four, when she'd saved him from the creature that had turned him into a werewolf. As he got up from his seat, Remus noticed Romulus staring at him, an odd look in his eyes that Remus couldn't identify and that made him feel slightly uncomfortable.

They got into the carriage that was going to take them to their house a few miles away. Most of the guests were traveling in a similar way, despite the fact that most of them could Apparate. Remus and Romulus were riding in a separate carriage from their father and grandfather. As they were moving along, Remus, who was sitting next to the door, and to the right of his brother, felt a light pressure on his knee. Looking down, he saw that it was his brother's hand. At first, he thought Romulus was just trying to comfort him (though he admittedly wasn't all that upset). But then, Romulus began to move his hand a little farther up Remus' leg, until it was practically caressing his thigh.

Remus shifted farther away from Romulus, causing his hand to fall off. He looked uncomfortably at his brother. "W-what are you doing, Romulus?" He stuttered slightly, as he noticed the look of almost lust in his brother's eyes.

Romulus smirked. "Just trying to comfort you, little brother," he sneered before turning away.

Remus was more than a little unnerved by this, and resolved to keep his distance from his brother while they were home. He had no idea why Romulus was acting like this, as he'd never behaved this way before.

A few hours later, after the relatives and family friends had all gone home, Remus lay in bed, contemplating the day's events. Romulus, despite Remus' attempts to avoid him, had managed to secretly touch Remus in a similar way to what he'd done in the carriage twice more that evening. Remus couldn't wait to get back to school, if only so he'd be able to keep away from his brother there. They'd never really gotten along, especially since Romulus blamed their mother's death on Remus, but Romulus had never done anything to him, other than a few insults about his being a werewolf.

However, as Remus lay in his bed, he began to wonder if that was about to change. He realized later, that he should have known exactly what was going to happen when Romulus stepped into his bedroom later that night. Remus, who hadn't heard his brother come in, was surprised when he felt the bed move, and looked up to see Romulus sitting on the end of the bed. "What do you want?" He asked, sitting up.

Romulus smirked as he moved forward, closer to Remus. Without saying anything, he grabbed the younger boy's hands in one of his and used the other to push his brother back onto the bed. Remus, frightened by this, began to struggle against his brother's grip, but it was no use. Romulus was much bigger and stronger than he was.

Forcing Remus to lay back, Romulus moved so that he was straddling Remus' hips. Once he was sure that the other boy wouldn't be able to get away, he pulled out his wand, still keeping a grip on Remus' hands. "Now, don't fight me little brother, or this won't go easy for you," he said before muttering a spell to conjure up some ropes and magically using them to tie Remus' hands to the head of the bed. Remus would have yelled for his father, but Romulus silenced him with a spell before he could do more than open his mouth.

"I told you to be good, brother. If you try anything else, I'll make sure this hurts a lot more than it has to," Romulus said, as he bound his younger brother's feet in a spread eagle position to the foot of the bed. Remus felt tears come to his eyes, as he continued to move around in the vain hope that he might be able to throw his brother off. As Romulus muttered yet another spell that made his pajamas fall off, Remus began to prey silently that his father would wake up and find them.

Romulus began taking his own clothes off as well, staring lustfully at his now completely naked brother all the while. He grinned sneeringly at Remus, as he straddled him once again. "I'm going to enjoy this," Romulus said gleefully. Remus' tears were coming harder now, and he closed his eyes in despair as he felt his brother's hands roaming over his body, before lingering between his thighs. Romulus groaned as he first touched his hardening erection, before moving up his brother's body so that he now straddled Remus' chest.

He grinned menacingly at Remus and said, "Suck, or I'll get my wand and curse you." Fearfully, Remus opened his mouth. He knew that there was no way he could fight his brother, not when he was at such a disadvantage, and he just wanted this to be over with. He began to cry even harder as Romulus plunged his cock into his mouth. Romulus groaned loudly as Remus sucked, "Yesss…" When Romulus came, Remus swallowed the bitter fluid quickly, in order to keep from choking on it.

Remus was relieved when Romulus stood up, and it must have shown on his face, because his brother said, "Oh, don't look so relieved, Remus. I'm not done with you yet." As good – or as bad – as his word, Romulus moved down to the end of the bed, positioning himself between Remus' knees. He began touching Remus all over once again, until he felt himself harden once more. Moving himself into position, he lifted Remus' hips with one hand so that he could gain better access.

Remus felt as though he was being torn to shreds as his brother forcibly entered him, and immediately began to thrust hard. Romulus groaned incoherently, and Remus began to wonder if he had placed a silencing charm on the room. Otherwise, his father should have heard him by now. Remus squeezed his eyes closed as a particularly powerful wave of pain flowed through him when the older boy pushed into him as hard as he could. It wasn't long before Romulus came once again, and he finally pulled out of Remus with one more groan of pleasure.

As he gathered up his clothes, Romulus sneered, "Now, be sure that you don't tell anyone about this, you hear? Because if you do, I'll make sure that everyone knows your little secret, too, brother." With one last flick of his wand, he vanished the ropes binding Remus before leaving the room. Remus was left to sob brokenly as he pulled his clothes back on, wincing at he pain in his back.

End flashback

Sirius sat there, stunned, as he listened to his friend's story. He felt nothing but rage for Romulus, as he watched Remus start crying silently again. How could someone do something so terrible to such a wonderful person?

"God, Remus, I'm – I'm sorry. Why didn't you ever tell us?" He asked, before pulling his friend into a fierce yet comforting hug.

Remus stiffened, and then relaxed as Sirius started to rub his back soothingly. "Because. I was embarrassed that I'd let him do that. It made me feel so dirty," He sobbed into Sirius' chest. "And worthless. What's worse is that ever since then, he's – he's always-" Remus broke off, choking with sobs.

Sirius looked at him in concern. "Remus," he began, his voice trembling with practically uncontrolled rage, "has he hurt you since then?"

Sirius felt himself begin to tear up as well as Remus nodded mutely. He clutched the smaller boy tighter against him. Remus continued to shake violently for a few more minutes, before finally calming down enough to bitterly say, "It's become a sort tradition on my birthday. No matter what I do, ever year, he manages to find some way to get to me, and hurt me in the same way as before. Only- only last time, he wasn't alone. If he hadn't had his friends, Jackson and Roberts with him, I'd have been able to get away. They kept telling me that no one would ever want a freak like me, so I might as well just give up and stop fighting them."

Sirius pulled away slightly, so that he could look Remus in the face. "Listen to me, Remus," he said firmly. "You can't pay attention to them. There are plenty of people who would want you. Who wouldn't?" He asked, looking at the distraught boy in his arms. It was common knowledge that Sirius was bisexual, and Remus was gay, but no one knew that Sirius had had a crush on the other boy since the middle of their third year, and had loved him since fourth year.

Remus snorted in derision. "Nobody with any sense would want me, Sirius. I'm not like you or even James. I'm not good-looking, I'm not athletic, and I'm certainly not outgoing. I'm nothing but a worthless bookworm. Hell, I'm a werewolf, a bloody gay werewolf who can't even stand up to his own brother!" He shouted bitterly.

Sirius grabbed his shoulders, forcing the other boy to face him. "Look at me, Remus. You are not worthless. So what if you don't play sports, or if you're not outgoing? And how can you say you're not good looking? Hell, you're bloody gorgeous, Remus. People would have to be insane not to like you." Sirius said forcefully, before he began to blush when he realized what he'd said. Stupid, now he's going to realize you like him. You've probably ruined everything. He cursed himself, as Remus looked at him in surprise.

"Who could possibly love a werewolf, Padfoot?" He asked quietly before looking away.

Sirius blushed even more before whispering, "I could."

"What?" Remus asked in shock, looking back up at his dark haired friend.

Now it was Sirius' turn to look away. He took a deep breath before saying louder this time, "I could. I mean, I do – you know – love you. I'm in love with you. I have been since last year."

"You're in love with me?" Remus asked, still very much shocked by this development.

Sirius nodded resignedly, still not looking at his friend. "Yes," he whispered. "I'll understand, of course, if you don't feel the same way. I mean, I'm not expecting you to go out with me, or anything, I just wanted you to know that there is someone who wants to love you, and-"

Remus interrupted Sirius by pressing his lips against the other boy's. Sirius sat there in shock, before gathering his wits together and responding to the kiss. It was sweet, and everything he'd ever dreamed of. It felt like Heaven, and Sirius was immensely disappointed when the need for air overcame both of them, forcing them to pull away.

They sat there on Remus' bed, looking at each other before Remus finally spoke, smiling shyly. "I love you, too, Sirius." Sirius grinned broadly, before pulling his new boyfriend in for yet another kiss.

Neither of them had forgotten about what Romulus had done, but it was difficult for Remus to feel frightened of his brother while he was wrapped up in Sirius' warm, loving embrace. For the first time in a long time, he felt truly safe, as he heard Sirius whisper, "Don't worry, love. I'll never let anyone hurt you again." They fell asleep in each other's arms not long after.

A/N:Should I continue? Please read and review!