Disclaimer: I do not own Smallville.

Spoilers: Inspired by Pariah

A Green Scarf

Clark ran the green scarf through his hands. It reminded him of his sins. He had claimed to love Alicia, and in the hour she needed him most, he turned his back on her. And now he can never apologize. Never.

Tears welled up in Clark's eyes. The green scarf dragged through his hands. He thought about when they went ice-skating. She needed this then. Was she wearing it then? Why couldn't he remember? Clark couldn't think. He knew it was not important to know her wardrobe, but he wanted to. He needed to. He needed to remember everything he could about her. After all, memories are all he has left now. Memories and a green scarf.

The scarf still smelled like Alicia. For a second, he felt as if she was there. Perhaps she just teleported back into his barn. He turned around, expecting her to be there. No one was in the barn with him. He was alone.

Clark stood up and started walking back into the house. She had wanted him to help her. She was innocent. He could have saved her. He could have helped.

Clark entered the kitchen and walked past his parents. They looked up, but he brushed past them. One of them called his name, but he never noticed. His parents. They didn't like Alicia. They blamed her for so much. Do they feel guilty? Clark felt angry. Are they upset with themselves, too? They also blamed her for the attacks, yet now, do they care?

Clark walked up the stairs to his bedroom. When he walked in he looked around. He could still remember the night when she came into his room. He could still kind of remember how she held him. He could almost remember her kisses. Almost.

Clark walked over to his desk and opened a drawer. He pulled out a box and opened it. "Alicia, I love you, and I always will. Please forgive me."

A tear rolled down his face. He didn't want to forget ever. He didn't want to forget her face, or her scent, or the way her smile looked. He didn't want to forget how she had changed. He didn't want to forget how she loved him. He didn't want to forget Alicia. He didn't want her to be gone.

He put the scarf in the box, next to a silver bracelet with turquoise stones. That was all he had left. A silver bracelet, a green scarf, and fading memories.