20: A Hard Place

A/N: took me a while. It's hard to drag on something I loathe like this fic. I had a bit of fun with it, however: not only is there a self-insertion, but I've put in one of the readers who e-mailed me and wanted me to continue. I also added in a secret for Selena that I had never thought about until now. However, I will be able to change that during the rewrite, which I am currently in the middle of but had to delay to produce this lovely short chapter. I hope length isn't an issue for my readers at this point.

Ginny had always wanted her brothers' respect, and there was always someone to promise it to her, yet anything promised to her fell flat as if it was destined to. She was surprised to find that, all along, she had the power to win respect from them all along. She was even more surprised to find that Percy, the only one who had ever shown regard to her, though she liked to discredit him, had given her the answer: Knowledge was the key to granting your wishes.

"Want me to tell you about what I know, Ron?" she asked him, leaning in the doorway of his dorm. Neville, Dean, and Seamus were so very uncomfortable with her presence that they made excuses about Potions homework and ran off, cursing their bachelor ways.

"Ginny! Have you known all this time about what happened to Harry and not told me?"

"I hope that's rhetorical, Ron," Ginny said, and she jumped onto his bed, propping her head up on her elbow. "I saw him yesterday... he came to Viole's dormitory."

"Ginny!" Ron gasped, scandalized. "What were you doing in that boy's bedroom? I should probably tell Mum."

She smiled. "Well, if you don't want to hear what I have to say, I can always–"

"No! Ginny, you have to tell me. I'll be good this time."

"All right then. He came to find Van."

"Didn't Fanel go missing, too?"

Ginny shrugged. "I saw neither of them after that. Harry was looking for an Invisibility Cloak that he said belonged to him. He said Van had caught him with his Slytherin girlfriend."

"What? That's all crazy, I don't know why Harry would say a thing like that!"

"I know!" exclaimed Ginny. "That's exactly what I thought. I wasn't about to believe that Harry has an Invisibility Cloak or a Slytherin girlfriend. I went to look for you then, but I couldn't find you."

"Harry wouldn't tell me about his girlfriend," Ron muttered.

"Harry has an Invisibility Cloak? Well, that about does it. I'm always the last to know, aren't I?"

"Hold on," said Ron, trying to distract her from her mood. "Harry was ripping the room apart yesterday. That must've been what he was looking for! So Fanel must've got the Cloak somehow, but it's not like Harry to leave that behind. That cloak was his father's."

"Well, I've said all I came to say," said Ginny, still ill-pleased at the secrets her brother kept from her. "Off I go. Poor Neville will be glad to have his territory back."

"Wait," said Ron, and Ginny paused to look at him. "Thanks."

She shrugged and nodded. "If anything had happened that you didn't know about, you'd be tearing your hair out over it."

Ron had the uneasy feeling that Ginny had somehow found a way to drive home her point of contention, and he felt guilty because of it.

_____

Dear Hitomi:

I'm a shameful correspondent! You must be surprised that I'm writing now. What kind of news could that little whelp be sending me, you wonder, when I have Van? And can any tidings be worse than those he has just sent? The job fell to me to tell you... but not yet. Let me write my heart out with cheerful frivolities before I have to lower the mood.

You know, I never expected that you would write to me; I figured I would be the last person you would ever be interested in. I was worried when we met that the only thing we would be able to talk about was Allen, and he's no fun! After getting to know you, it was rather mean of me to think so. Sorry! I have yet to get accustomed to being real, let alone a person of my own. I miss you right now! I wish you hadn't had to go... and you know, I could swear that Folken said the same thing himself, once upon a time.

No, I'm never going to get over him. I'm not ever going to try, so don't try to keep me from licking my wounds. I haven't told a single person except for you, and I'd like it if we could bury that news as deep as him. Please, try to forget it if you can.

Here comes the bad news, on top of everything else that's happened: Van has disappeared. After Folken, he was miserable and went out drinking, and one time, he just never came back. My little courtier, Harry Potter, is also gone, but I don't know if it's related; Harry's of no interest to V., is he?

Since I don't know anything about it, I'm also hoping that you might have something to tell us about it. I don't want to sound like this right now, but I have to ask. Did he ever mention, in recent letters, whether he wanted to go back to Gaea, or whether he ever had plans that involved leaving? Was he restless? Maybe in his letters from after Folken, there was a change in mood. When you reply, I can start investigating in earnest, but I need to assemble the facts first.

Don't worry about Van! He can handle himself in any situation. Make sure to get your sleep at regular hours in order to defeat those nightmares.

Oh, another thing: do a reading for me, will you? I miss having a predictable life.

Your loving friend, Selena Schezar

Hitomi should have expected it. Selena's letter itself was a bolt from the blue, for she had spoken the truth in calling herself "a shameful correspondent". Still, it was silly of her to have ever believed that Van could stay out of trouble.

She knew it wasn't his fault, although this time, she rather hoped it was. To have someone else to blame in Van's disappearance–that little green-eyed boy, perhaps–would warp the situation into something else entirely, something that she was totally unprepared to think about.

Although, there had been... why had she been a part of that dream? She had been an invisible witness. At the time, it had been inconsequential; she had dismissed it as the fantasy of a sadist, trespassing into her head. She'd even gleaned a bit of fun from it, taking it as a crossed signal from one of her roommates' dreams. How she'd laughed over imagining the iconoclastic, resentful Leah making herself supernatural! She'd had to stuff her face in her pillow every time she saw the girl stalk by afterwards.

But there would be no more fun now. She tried to remember the dream: she could only remember the existence of thoughts and voice in it. There had been nothing else.

So, what would she do? The only thing right would be to go and look for him. Selena had been right, of course; Van could take care of himself. Still, she was worried. The dream had been a bad sign. If she was with the others, they could figure something out, like how to get back to Gaea.

For a moment, she wished she hadn't given her pendant to Selena. Right now, it could be useful. She remembered when she had tried to teach Van how to use it, with Merle. She hadn't thought about Merle in a long time; now, she wondered whether there was a way of telling her about Van, or whether she ought to be told at all.

"Hey, Tomi." Feye Morgan, a roommate of hers, poked her head through the curtain surrounding the bed. "Figured out what you're doing for March break yet?"

Hitomi blinked. She had forgotten all about it, but immediately, she realized what must be done.

"Yes," she said. "I'm going to Hogwarts."

Feye squealed and gave her a hug. "That's great! I wish I could go. So you'll finally get a change to see your boyfriend again?"

Hitomi sighed. She would write Selena and tell her tonight; she would teach her how to use the pendant. Perhaps, for once, she would sleep well.

_____

Shesta stomped, screamed, and waved his hands above them, and he had to admit it was the only way that Selena would ever find him. Not that she was having any luck anyway, since he was in the Forbidden Forest and she refused to use a broom to search for him. He went quiet, listening for any sounds that would indicate Selena coming towards him. If he strained his ears, he thought he could hear a crunch–coming from the opposite direction. He hastily moved away from his spot.

From a crack through the canopy, he could see the sky. It was getting dark now, and he was lost. His faith in Selena's psychic sense was ebbing.

He had just regained breath enough to start screaming again, when he heard something that stilled his breath right away. It sounded familiar... he leapt through the undergrowth of the forest, trying to make as little noise as possible and get closer.

And then, he became close enough to hear better–anyone could have heard–and he realized where he had heard it before, for he saw the flickering glow that came through the window, and it all made sense.

The mad coups of laughter leaking through the window, as well as the smoke, could only mean one thing.

Dilandau was back.

Shesta knew his possessions were going up in flame, but they were of little expenditure. Without ever realizing he had left it, he ran back into the forest as a refuge. He could face whatever was ahead, knowing what was behind.

He fell asleep with some difficulty, encamping upon a large slab of rock, but when he woke and saw the smoke still streaking across the castle, he decided he should figure out what to do. What to do, indeed? The only thing to counter Dilandau's new madness was to bring up against it opposition. That was the answer: Van had left, leaving Dilandau the current champion, and now Van would need to return in order to stop him.

Shesta thought wistfully of Folken. If only there were Gaeans who weren't students still at the school!

And then his eyes widened; he remembered.

He jumped off the rock, sending birds and rodents scattering, and ran straight to the castle. Shesta came across his uncle almost at once.

"Uncle Dryden! I'm fortunate to see you already."

Dryden stared. "Are you ill? Should we get you a nurse?"

"No, but this is important. I need your help. We must go somewhere private and talk."

Dryden hesitated. "It's not the kind of trouble that we can't bring a lady into, is it? We should call in reinforcements."

Shesta had expected this, of course. Strength in numbers as always. "Go ahead." From now on, it would barely be his plan, but that of an entirely different universe. He would lose control altogether.

He was lost before they even reached their destination. When they did arrive, he was disappointed. The surprise that had built during the long walk was monumental... and then the door opened, and he saw a princess.

He whirled around to confront his uncle, but Dryden was already greeting Eries. Shesta stood in the background, waiting for the princess to prove herself with a scowl on his face.

And she did.

_____

Harry blinked and shifted around the room again, nervously to avoid Van, who was asleep. He wanted to prevent arousing any more suspicion from him; Van was dangerous, Harry could tell, too volatile for his mild temperament to figure out. He didn't even want to try.

He would be stuck here, between a rock and a hard place. There went Hogwarts; there went safety; there went the beginning of the friendship he had felt for Van. Never had Harry felt like more of a fatalist. He fumbled around with sweaty palms for his wand, and as he rummaged further into the pockets of his robes, he forgot to breathe. He didn't have his wand with him.

Unwittingly, he mimicked Van's prostrate form when he sprawled out on the floor, stretching his arms in front of him. He puffed out his cheeks and exhaled slowly in an effort to occasion some sort of brilliant thought.

And then, he waited. He thought he could once remember someone–perhaps a teacher in primary school–telling him to make his own luck. He waited for an idea to steal luck from, and it never came.

No one else ever came, either, and the stalemate of imprisonment he was stuck in started to burn a slow resentment into him. Someone should at least have been looking, he thought. After all, he was Harry Potter...

Van glared at the form of the boy before him. Blaming him when he hadn't even wanted to be here–how dare he? What was the boy even doing here? Van had not yet heard of You-Know-Who, let alone Harry's involvement.

It seemed unfair to him that the other boy should be there at all. It would come in handy near the end, if there was an end, when they were hungry, but he was not ready to think of that.

What was the boy doing here? Van knew the kinds of things he would be wanted for, and he had been expecting this kind of thing all his life, but this other boy was little and weak, and couldn't even hold his liquor. Somehow, Van felt–despite the inconsistency of a nobody causing anything–that this was his fault.

He reached out slowly to unfasten Harry's robes, hoping to find something on him indicative of why they were here, but Harry's arm shot out and wrapped around his wrist.

"Snitch..." he mumbled, and Van rebuked himself for being alarmed. He was still asleep, anyway. He would have lots of time.

But before he went any farther, he had to pry his hand out of Harry's arm. Had he thought the boy was weak? He should not have been so easily deceived. Next time, he would know better...

There would be no next time, for then people appeared behind him and he was struck down.

"Oh," someone said. "Wrong one. Eejits! Well, he's best off there anyway."

They moved around him, gripped Harry Potter by his arms, and disappeared.

"Now the fun begins," said Lord Voldemort as they appeared, and he fingered his wand. "Wake him up. I wouldn't want Harry Potter to miss this..."

Harry screamed as he woke.