LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! BOYS AND GIRLS! ELVES AND DWARVES! KENDER AND GNOMES! DRACONIANS AND GULLY DWARVES!!!

DRAGONS AN-

"Tas, I think that's enough, just introduce the damn show already!"

"Oh, Sorry."

KRYNNISH IDOL!

"Hello folks, this is Tasselhoff Burrfoot, the Tasselhoff Burrfoot mind you, that killed The Evil Dragonlord Master Teode! Hero of the Kender kind! Best friends with Fizban! THE ONE AND ONLY TASSELHOFF-

Everyone: "TAS!!!!!!!!!"

Tas: "Sorry!"

"Well, any way, my name is Tas and I'm the host of tonight's first ever KRYNNISH IDOL!

I was going to be a contestant, but it turns out that the judges thought I sang sooo good that it wouldn't be fair to the other contestants to have me there, singing my kender soul out-

Raistlin: "That's what you think you scatterbrained fool, if you had sang just a little longer I would have completed the spell to turn you into a cricket..."

Goldmoon: "Oh Raistlin, just be thankful that we won't have to hear him sing, I never thought I would say that I would rather hear a kender prattle than hear one sing. But I just said it didn't I?"

Theros: "Tas, aren't you going to introduce us?"

Tas: "I was getting to it! But Raistlin kept interrupting me!"

Theros: "Well just do it please so we can get on with the competition!"

Tas: "FINE!"

"Well ladies and gentlemen, it's time for me to introduce the judges for tonight's show, You people on earth may be used to seeing Simon, Paula, and Randy, but personally I think are judges are waaaaay better! So give us a round of applause for...Drum roll

Theros Ironfeld! (Our 'Randy' Substitute)

Goldmoon! (A great singer, and just as sweet as Paula)

And last but not least, the Baron of Burns, the Sultan of Sarcasm, the Mage who's a Megalomani-

"Ast kiranann kair gadunrm soth-arn suh kali..."

"Raistlin the Archmage, most powerful being on Krynn, I'd kiss the hem of thy robes if you'd let me get near them-our third judge Replacing Simon!"

Raistlin: "I've never heard you talk so fast and so eloquently in one sentence kender."

Tas: "It's amazing what a lightning bolt does to your brain upon impact."

The Judges are seated

Tas: "Now folks it's time for our first contestant, Krynnish Idol being a bit different, The judges don't know who the contestants are. The whole judging and screening process was based on sound only! So I'm sure our judges are going to be in for a surprise when I announce that our first contestant is...Drum roll!

CARAMON MAJERE!

Raistlin: "oh my god..."

Goldmoon: " I didn't know your brother could sing..."

Theros: "I don't know a thing about singing! I can't sing myself! I don't know why I'm here! AGHHHHH!"

Childlike Empress: "You're here because I needed a third judge and I couldn't think of anyone else. Just sit and smile! Let the other two do everything. Here, have a Blue Coconut Slushie, it'll make you feel better."

Theros: slurp "Okay".

Tas: As I was saying, before Theros had a nervous breakdown.."

CARAMON MAJERE!

Singing...

(At this point the audience is stunned when Caramon emerges dressed in only a pair of tight leather pants...)

Author Cuts in

"Due to explicit lyrics, Caramon will be singing a "Friendly version" so as not to gross out younger viewers. Also, there will be no striptease... right Caramon? Caramon?"

"I'm to sexy for my love, to sexy for my love

love's going to leave me

I'm to sexy for my shirt, to sexy for my shirt,

So sexy it hurts!

And I'm, to sexy for Milan, to sexy for Milan, New York and Japan!

Starts to dance a little dirty..

Goldmoon!!

Raistlin: Turns green

Theros: Oooh yeah baby!

Everyone: "HUH?"

And I'm, to sexy for your party, to sexy for your party,

no way I'm disco dancing,

I'm a model you know what I mean

And I do my little turn on the catwalk

Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah

I'm to sexy for my car, to sexy for my car

Too sexy by farrrr

And I'm too sexy for my hat, too sexy for my hat,

what do you think about that?

I'm a model, you know what I mean

And I do my little turn on the catwalk

Yeah on the catwalk on the catwalk yeah

I shake my little tush on the catwalk

I'm to sexy for my girl, to sexy for my mother, I'm definitely to sexy for my brother!

I'm to sexy for this song, to sexy for this song, too sexy, to sexy for this song!"

Then Despite Childlike Empress screaming "NOOOO!"

Caramon Majere, dropped his little leather pants.

Goldmoon: "Your brother wears Spongebob boxers?

Theros: "SEXY!"

Raistlin: "I think I'm going to be sick.."

Tas: "WOW! Was that some dancing Caramon did out there! Never knew the guy had it in him. He practically had the whole audience chanting "take it off take it off" I wonder if he's thought about applying for a gig with Chippendales...

hehehe, anyway, time for the Judges Evaluation."

Caramon: "I did it! I did it! OMG! Raist! Did I look good?"

Raistlin:

Caramon: "And I thought that if I become famous, you could be my back up dancer!"

(At this point Raistlin starts to sprint towards the men's room, I believe our favorite Mage just lost his lunch ladies and gentlemen.)

Goldmoon: Um, I think Raistlin just made his evaluation clear, so I guess it's my turn.

Your voice is pretty good, but your dancing is Border lining a porn film, and you look terrible in that shade of leather.

Theros: "Can I have your number?"

Everyone: "EWW! He's married you freak!"

Tas: Okay folks, look forward to more contestants, the winner overall will be announced at the end so it looks like Caramon hasn't been cut. Yet.

The Authoress has ideas for most of the characters and their songs, but if you have any suggestions as to what Bupu should sing, make sure to place a vote along with your review. And remember! Unless you review saying you want more, poor Raistlin will be left puking indefinitely, so once you review, Raist can stop puking, and the competition can continue!

So, Review folks!

P.S. Flames will be used to Incinerate plague infested villages.

So, even the worst of your flames go to a good cause.

P.P.S. The Authoress apologizes for making Theros Gay, but she didn't know what to do with him any how.

P.P.P.S Goddess, I'm going to lose my voice ding this- one more thing, updates will be weekly, as the Authoress has problems with the parental noose encircling her computer time.