O.K. I know Kirsten seems a little out of character in this story but I wanted to explore the effect Caleb's revelation has had upon her. This was inspired by the promos for this week's O.C. episode (episode 7, January 6th 2005).

Part of the Family

Ryan sat with his feet dangling over the edge of the boardwalk. His breathing was rapid, his whole body shaking. He fumbled to light the cigarette with his trembling hands, hampered more by the breeze blowing across from the ocean. He cupped his hand protectively around the naked flame and finally it lit. He took a long deep drag, deep into his lungs. Even a year after quitting, one drag could calm him almost instantaneously.

He still couldn't quite believe what had happened. In an instant, he had been transported back to his mother's house, to the yelling and cursing and threatening. In an instant, his relationship with Kirsten had been ripped apart. He couldn't believe how angry she'd been. He couldn't believe how she'd screamed at him. And most of all, he thought bitterly, he couldn't believe how he'd allowed himself to be in this position again. He might have known it couldn't last. He might have known he'd screw it up. He chewed his lip as he sat brooding, staring unseeing, out to sea. In the whole time he'd lived at the Cohens', Kirsten had never raised her voice to him. He wasn't sure he'd even heard her raise her voice to Seth. Even during the whole Oliver debacle, her voice had always been the voice of reason, the voice of calm. But finally he'd done it. His behavior had pushed her over the edge and Ryan was sure he knew what the outcome would be. He'd been stupid to think it could be any other way. Drop your guard for just a minute and something will come along to smack you back down where you belong.

"What the hell is going on Ryan? Did our conversation at breakfast mean nothing to you? What in God's name were you thinking? She's almost your aunt for God's sake!" Kirsten stood, hands on hips, her face full of disbelief and incomprehension.

Ryan stood stock still, shocked at the depth of Kirsten's anger. His face mirrored the confusion he was feeling inside. He knew he should have been more careful about having Lindsay over, considering what Sandy had said this morning about keeping the fact that he was dating her under wraps for a while. Kirsten had still been under the impression that they were simply lab partners, working on a vacation assignment together. But still, he reasoned, she could have knocked, and anyway, was it really such a big deal? It wasn't like they were really related.

He looked across at her as her ranting came to an end. He had never seen her so angry. It was a big deal to her. He could see that now. He just didn't know why.

Ryan swallowed and wrapped his arms around himself tightly. His eyes betrayed his desperation.

"Kirsten, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I should have. It's just…you were so upset already I …" Ryan ran out of words and looked pleadingly at Sandy for help.

"Kirsten honey, we all agreed it would be better if you didn't know, give you and Lindsay some time to mull things over before adding in any other complications. It's just as much my fault as Ryan's. Don't take it out on him." Sandy attempted to put his hands on Kirsten's shoulders and calm his wife down. She shook him off angrily and turned on him.

"You all decided it was better that I didn't know? Who gave you the right to make those decisions? Haven't people been keeping me in the dark for long enough? It's not enough that my own father has been lying to me for sixteen years, my husband and kids just have to join in?"

Seth and Sandy looked at each other shamefacedly. Ryan studied the floor.

"Mom, please."

"Keep out of this Seth. It has nothing to do with you."

Seth nodded and looked down at his feet. His mother rarely got angry but this Chrismukkah it was beginning to become the norm. Seth was scared. His mother was furious at Ryan, and Ryan appeared distraught. He wasn't quite sure what had happened in the Pool house, from where they'd both emerged, Kirsten first, rapidly followed by Ryan in a somewhat disheveled state, but whatever it was, the repercussions were explosive.

Kirsten turned back to Ryan and regarded him coldly.

"Apart from anything else young man, I can't believe you've forgotten how you spent this summer and what put you in that position."

Ryan didn't dare look up at Kirsten. He guessed he deserved that. It must have looked bad. Him with no shirt on sprawled on top of Lindsay who wore not much more. O.K, so Lindsay and he hadn't crossed the line just yet but it was easy to see why Kirsten might think they had. His eyes darted across to Sandy.

Sandy interjected quickly, grasping fully what must have just happened in the Pool house.

"Kirsten that isn't fair. Ryan's not the problem here."

"Ryan's behavior is a problem," she answered.

Sandy screwed his face up in disbelief. This wasn't the Kirsten he knew. Kirsten in her right mind would never speak to Ryan like this. He shook his head, perplexed and at a loss for words.

Ryan looked up at her, struggling to keep his emotions in check. Their eyes locked for a split second before he looked away and left the kitchen, slamming the door behind him loudly.

Sandy glanced out of the window just in time to see Ryan pull on his black hoody and head off down the hill on his bike.

He turned on Kirsten.

" I hope to God you're satisfied Kirsten. He's seventeen years old. You're an adult." His voice was bitter and resentful.

Kirsten looked visibly shaken but stayed silent, refusing to meet his eyes.

With that, Sandy turned and left.

tbc