Hey all!
This is a very strange TV show, that I've made up! I don't know, if there is a program i real life, called Challenge, I've never heard of it....
Anyway....
Read, review, ect....
I don't own any of the Artemis Fowl caracters...
Enjoy reading...
Presentation of the competitors
Scene: TV studio where everything is red, and looks like that it's made of metal.
In the room are Foaly, Holly Short, Artemis Fowl and Juliet Butler. They all look pretty confused.
A thin, blond elf (the host) in a red suit, comes in.
Host: Welcome to Challenge- Artemis Fowl Edition!
Holly: What the hell is happening here?!
Host: Shut up! (ignores her) This is our first show, so I'll just explain what the show is all about.
Four persons, two of the People and two humans, are going to compete against each other, in three different challenges.
After every challenge, will the viewers vote for the person, who they think did worse in the challenge, they've just seen.
Holly: HEY! No one have asked me to be in a TV show!
Host: I said shut up, young lady!
Holly: (sighs and mutters angry)
Host: Let the show begin.
The host walks over to the four competitors. They still look confused.
Host: And here we have our four competitors! What's your name? (Points his microphone at Holly)
Holly: Holly Short. Why am I here anyway? I don't want to be in a TV show!
Host: (Ignores her again) Tell me something about yourself.
Holly: NO I WON'T!
Host: We'll be back, after a short break.
Commercial:
Speaker: When you're in trouble, talk to Trouble! He will get you out of the trouble!
(A confused Trouble Kelp appears on the screen)
Trouble: Hey! Why am I in a commercial?! And what is that stupid slogan all about?
Speaker: When you're in trouble, talk to Trouble! He will get you out of the trouble!
Trouble: Am I just in this stupid commercial, so that you can make fun of my name or what?!"
Speaker: Actually, yes…
Trouble: I won't put up with this!
(The picture slowly fades out. Two muscular elves come in, and drag The struggling Trouble out)
Trouble: Hey! I'm not finished! Don't make fun of my name! I won't tolerate this! I'll sue you! I'll…
Host: Welcome back, after this nice commercial!
All the competitors has now got Q-cards.
Host: And we'll try again. (Points again his microphone at Holly) Can you tell me about yourself, Holly?
Holly: Do I really have to read this crap?
Host: Yes, you really have to read that crap.
Holly: Ok then… Hey all, I'm Holly Short. I live in Haven, and I'm the first female LEP officer ever. (looks up) Why do people need to know this stuff?!
Host: Because. Read!
Holly: There isn't more on the card!
Host: Take the next one, stupid girl! (Hits her with his microphone)
Holly: AU! Why did you do that? Ok, I'll read the next one. I'm single, still looking or the- HEY! WHAT'S THIS ALL ABOUT?!
Host: Read!
Holly: I'm not, I repeat NOT, gonna read this!
The host is starting to growl. She takes a step away from him, and read.
Holly: I'm single, still looking for the –sigh- great love.
A guy from the audience stand up, and waves at Holly.
Guy: Hey Holly! You've already found him! I'm right here!
Holly recognizes him.
Holly: Shut up Chix! For the last time, I'm NOT interested!
Chix sits down.
Host: And thank you Holly. And here we have our next competitor. Who are you? (Points his microphone at Foaly)
Foaly: (Looks at his card) My name is Foaly, and I live in Haven. I am… No, this is just too stupid!
Host: Just read it!
Foaly: Ok, ok… I'm a paranoid centaur, and I work at the LEP, with computers and stuff. (Looks offended) It's not just computers and stuff! It's…
Host: Yeah, Foaly. No one understands that anyway, so… Thank you. And you would be?
Artemis: You don't want me to read this, do you? Seriously?
Host: (Getting more and more angry) YES I DO!
Artemis: And what if I deny?
Host: Then I'm gonna explode!
Artemis: Fine with me. Explode.
Host: (Screams loudly)
The two elves from the commercial come in, and drag him out. A new host, with dark hair, but the same red suit, comes in.
(New) Host: Hello everyone. What's the problem?
Artemis and Holly: (at the same time) These Q-cards are too stupid! (Looks surprised at each other)
Host: Just read it, ok.
Artemis: No!
Host: NOW!
Artemis: (Sighs) Ok, if you insist. My name is Artemis, and I live in Ireland. I'm going at St. Bartleby school. When I'm not at school, I like to do criminal stuff, and work with computers. WHAT? Where do you people know this stuff from?! Why do everybody else need to know it?!
Host: Shh…
Artemis: What am I doing here anyway? I'm…
Host: And I think it's time, that we talk to our last competitor. Hello who are you? (Points the microphone at Juliet)
Artemis: HEY! Don't interrupt me! No one interrupts Artemis Fowl the Second!
Juliet: (To the host) He's right you know…
Host: Why don't you just SUHUT UP?! BOTH OF YOU! RIGHT NOW!
Juliet: Wasn't I going to read my cards?
Host: Ok then. Read.
Juliet: Hey you guys! My name is Juliet Butler, and I live in Ireland. I like wrestling, and I am pretty good at it myself. HEY! My cards wasn't stupid!
Host: Aha… After the commercial, we'll be back, with more Challenge- Artemis Fowl Edition!
Commercial:
(A forbidding-looking man comes in.)
(A little girl comes in)
Man: Hello little girl. Want some candy?
Girl: Yes thanks.
Man: Then come with me.
Girl: Ok.
(She walks over to him, takes his hand, and go away with him. The man is smirking evil.)
Speaker: Protect your kids against sinister people. Buy Dr. S. Elf-defense's self-defense video to your children, then they will learn to handle the situation, the right way.
(A forbidding-looking man comes in.)
(A little girl comes in)
Man: Hello little girl. Want some candy?
Girl: Yes thanks.
Man: Then come with me.
Girl: Ok.
(She walks over to him, kicks him between his legs, and runs away.)
Speaker: That, ladies and gentlemen, is the way to handle the situation.
Choir: (Sings) S. Elf-defense, S. Elf-defense. Oh, that Dr. S. Elf-defense.
He safes your child, and safes the day.
He's Dr. S. Elf-Defeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeense.
So... Liked that? Want me to write more? If you do, ten I will, if not... I will anyway!
Please, review!!!