Randomness Reborn
One fine day at Destiny Islands, Riku was sitting alone on the beach when a fish named Dan jumped up from the water and slapped him on the face for thinking bad thoughts about… err… forget it…
One fine day at Destiny Islands, Riku was sitting alone on the beach when his dumb, best friend, Sora, sat beside him, with a notebook in his hand.
Riku: Whats that for?
Sora: Mom told me to write down every stupid thing I say so that I would become smart… Not that I need it. Hey, you wanna hear something cool?
Riku: I'm not sure…
Sora: Whatever, the other day, I tried to drown a fish, and guess what?
Riku: It didn't drown?
Sora: No, we tried to cook it for dinner.
Rike: Oh… Wait, "tried"?
Sora: Yeah, I accidentally put it on fire and dropped it, and uhhh, you know my dad always taught me to fight fire with fire soooo…
Riku: #barely listening, eating Dan#
Sora: I threw a log from the fireplace at it, and burned the whole house down…
Riku: #spits out Dan# WHAT?!?!?
Dan: Yo homey! Don't go spittin' on me brotha!
Riku: #throws coconut#
Dan: #knocked out#
Sora: Yeah, and that's not all, I tried to put it out with what I though was water and…
House: #goes BOOM! Sirens are heard#
1 hour later
Riku: #Staring at what once was Sora's home#
Kairi: Hey Sora, Riku.
Sora, Riku: Hey Kai…
Kairi: Sora, remember the bucket of gasoline I lent you?
Riku: Why would you give Sora a bucket of gasoline?
Kairi: I didn't give it to him; I just wanted him to hide it for me. #smiles#
Riku: Why would you need to hide…? You know what? I don't care, it's just stupid…
Kairi: Good boy! #pats him on head# Hey Sora! Wanna toast marshmallows at the burning ruins of your house?
Sora: #staring into empty space#
Riku: I'll go… #walks towards the fire#
Sora: #calling out to Riku and Kairi# Hey guys! Look! It's air!
At fire
Riku: #Holding stick over fire with a frog impaled on it#
Kairi: #Holding stick over fire with snail on it# You know, people are gonna start to wonder why I brought this bag of marshmallows…
Riku: Screw them… #gets sapped with lightning, looks up# I'm sorry dammit!
Sora: I wonder what water tastes like…
Kairi: #banging head on log#
Oprah Winfrey(or whatever): #appears from thin air with two million dollar dress#
Oprah: Yo wassup homies?!
Riku: OH HELL NO!! #pulls out minigun and shoots Oprah numerous times on the chest and head#
Kairi: Whoot! Female freedom from the oppressions of the ever-evil Oprah!!#waves banner that reads: "No Black People"#
Riku: I can take that my idiotic "friend" burnt his own house to the ground. I can take that my other friend is a racist psychopath. But I will not take this sh!t!!!! #Eyes go red, starts foaming at mouth# ARRGH!!
Kairi: Riku?
Sora: Kairi?
Dan: Sora?
Sora: Dan?
Kairi: Sora?
Sora: Riku?
Kairi: Oh, this is some Jerry Springer sh!t…
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Ok so its 12:47 AM right now and I just finished writing this…. thing… This is my first humor fic so go easy on me if its not that funny… R&R
And also, I am not a racist, Kairi is… so please don't be angry at me, its just part of the "hilarity"
also, for some reason I can't use asteriscs to point out actions so I'm using # (which is kind of close...)