Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam SEED or any fairy tale that each chapter is based on.
A/N – Thanks to everybody that reviewed! Yay! Of course it's been like six or seven months since I updated this… wow… well then… yeah… read and enjoy!
WARNING- characters are out of character
Chapter 1 – Banana Yellow and the Seven Chibis
Once upon a time, there lived a beautiful princess by the name of Snow White. She had a face as white as snow, lips as red as blood, and hair as black as ebony. She was sweet and caring, and was the most beautiful person in the world.
Unfortunately, due to certain complications, she has been sucked into another dimension and had to be replaced in order for the story to go on. She has now been replaced by her evil nemesis, Banana Yellow, who did not have blood red lips, a snow white face, ebony black hair, and was not sweet, and caring. Instead, Banana Yellow was the complete opposite of the amazingly gentle Snow White.
Cagalli blinked and rubbed at her eyes. She closed her eyes tightly, and rubbed at them again. Opening her eyes, she looked at her surroundings. She was no longer in her house in the library. She was in some sort of garden filled with cute little animals, beautiful flowers, and amazing handcrafted statues. The birds sang beautiful songs which filled the air as more birds and animals gathered around.
The ORB princess stared around at her surroundings with her eyes wide in confusion. "Where the hell am I?"
Animals began to gather around her, all of them looking at Cagalli with their large, innocent eyes. Not taking any notice of the animals the ORB Princess called out, "Athrun? Kira? Lacus? Athrun? ATHRUN?" Her voice echoed, but there was no reply.
Taking a step forward, she tripped and fell. Grimacing in pain, Cagalli finally noticed what she was wearing. A dress. An overly puffy, and itchy dress. But that wasn't the worst. Staring in horror at the thing that made her fall, Cagalli (aka Banana Yellow) screamed.
"Magic Haro on the wall, who is the fairest one of all?" Snow White's stepmother stood in front of the Haro.
"Haro haro!" The pink Haro on the wall began to flap its ears excitedly. Then it spun rapidly and detached itself from the wall. The Queen watched as the Haro bounced away.
"Ugh! Not again! That's the third time this week! Get back here and give me an answer!" The wicked Queen began to run after it.
Cagalli's eyes began to tear up. Nothing scared her more than high heels. She could never understand why people wore those things. High heels were easy to trip in, they broke easily, and they make walking a pain in the ass.
Sitting up she sniffed lightly, and then began to fiddle with the heels in an attempt to get the wretched thing off. As she tried to undo the strap, a little rabbit jumped onto her face knocking her back to the ground. Grabbing the rabbit off her face, she tossed it into the nearby bushes. Getting back up, she tried to undo the strap but then a mass of birds landed on her body, chirping cheerfully. Glaring daggers at the birds, she decided to try the calming routine Athrun always did. She took a deep breath and breathed out as calmly as possible, repeating it a few more times. No matter how angry she was, she wasn't about to commit animal cruelty… unless they REALLY pissed her off.
"Get the hell off of me little birdies… before I let loose my rage on you…" Cagalli said with a hint of anger leaking through.
The birds continued to chirp happily as they sat on her whole body from head to toe. As they continued their little party, more birds decided to come join them. The gathering of birds finally came to a stop when one of them pooped on her foot. Staring in shock at what the bird did, Cagalli finally snapped. Lunging forward, she made a grab for the bird. However, the bird sensing the danger flew off into the air along with all the other birds.
"GET THE HELL BACK HERE YOU DAMN THING! HOW DARE YOU SHIT ON ME! GET BACK HERE! JUST YOU WAIT! WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, PREPARED TO BE FRIED!" Cagalli continued to scream at the bird while stomping angrily on the ground, and successfully broke the heels off her shoes.
Hearing the harsh screams of some young damsel, the young prince ran along the path towards the voice. He continued to run until he entered the amazingly large, beautiful garden filled with everything that should be in a fairy tale garden.
Standing in the center of the garden stood a young girl with shoulder length blonde hair, adorned in a puffy, frilly dress. She was surrounded by dozens and dozens of cute little animals who loved her with all their hearts… except for the birds that seemed to be preparing to attack her for some reason.
The young prince stood at the garden entrance watching the young maiden get into a fighting stance as she prepared for the bird rush. He watched in wonder as to what would happen next.
The pink Haro rounded the corner, bouncing ahead at full speed. Running frantically after it was the evil stepmother.
"HARO! HAROOOO! GENKI!" The Haro reached an open window and jumped through.
"Come back! Tell me who's the fairest one of all?" She looked out from the window to see the Haro jump from bird to bird until it reached the ground. The Haro then bounced towards the center of the garden where Banana Yellow stood battling birds with a tree branch.
"Haro!"
Cagalli looked down, while dodging a bird, to see the overly excited pink Haro jumping up and down by her feet. "Haro? Then that means…" She looked around in search of the Pink Princess. Finally she looked up at the large lone tower to see the person she was searching for. "Lacus!" Cagalli began to laugh happily and grabbed the Haro in her excitement.
The birds seeing that Cagalli had let her guard down took advantage of the moment and attacked again.
"Ow!" said Cagalli as a bird pecked at her arm. Just seconds after, a large group of birds came from behind and knocked her onto the ground.
The young prince gasped as he watched the fair maiden fall over ever so ungracefully, her elbow now bleeding slightly. Seeing this he rushed over to the side of the blonde maiden, and picked her up gently in his arms.
"Athrun?" Cagalli looked at him in shock. "H-huh? I-I mean… Wha-what're you doing here too? Lacus too. How about Kira? And everybody else?" Cagalli began to become more frantic as she continued. Grabbing Athrun by the collar, she shook him roughly as she yelled, "Where the hell are we? What is this freaky place with cute little animals and killer birds? And just why the hell am I in a dress with high heels? High heels damn it! I HATE HIGH HEELS!"
The young prince, Athrun Zala, blushed slightly as he realized how close his and Cagalli's faces were. "A-amazing. This must be some kind of fate. How did you ever know my name fair maiden?"
Her hands loosened their grip on his collar. "F-fair… maiden? Just what are you talking about?"
Taking one of her hands into his, he brought it to his lips and kissed it lovingly.
Up in the tower, the evil stepmother looked down in fury at the young lovey-dovey couple. The sight of such lovingness caused a whirlpool of emotions to stir within the queen as she stomped off in anger to find a certain someone.
Cagalli felt herself blush slightly as she watched Athrun kiss the back of her hand. For that one moment she forgot the fact that she was wearing two of the things that she hated more than anything else, she forgot that evil birds had just been attacking her relentlessly, and she forgot that Athrun was acting very unusual.
Slowly, Athrun lifted his head from Cagalli's hands and stared straight into her eyes. "Fair maiden, if I may ask… will you honour me-"
Realizing what he was going to ask, Cagalli screamed and punched Athrun right in the gut. Kneeling on the ground on all fours, he coughed and struggled to stay upright. "N-nice (cough) punch fair maiden. (cough, cough)"
Feeling a bit guilty after what she had done, Cagalli crawled over to his side. "S-sorry… blame it on reflexes. But why are you so impatient for? You just asked me to… uh…well… honour you with my hand in m…mar… something just a few hours ago. Give me some time to think it over…"
After a few more minutes Athrun was able to recover slightly from the blow he took. He coughed a little bit and then asked, "But what do you speak of my lady? Is this not the first time we have met? I will have surely remembered someone as pure and jubilant as you."
"Huh?" Narrowing her eyes suspiciously, Cagalli stood up and began to circle the blue haired prince slowly. "Are you really… Athrun?"
"Yes! It is I, Prince Athrun Zala of the kingdom of ORB."
"T-the kingdom of ORB!" Cagalli yelled. Her thoughts were running rampantly as she tried to put everything together. First of all, Athrun did not know who she was. He thought that this was the first time that they had ever met. Second-
"And may I ask what your name is?" Athrun asked.
"Don't interrupt me when I'm thinking!"
"My apologies." He continued to sit down on the ground and waited patiently.
Continuing her thoughts, Cagalli decided that she was definitely having a nightmare that she just couldn't wake up from. Either that or she'd gone crazy.
As she tried to continue on with her thoughts, she felt herself get picked up off the ground roughly and thrown over someone's shoulder like a potato sack.
"H-hey! What the heck are you doing?" she screamed. The person who picked her up had messy black hair, and was dressed in what looked like the red ZAFT uniform. Cagalli looked over towards Athrun to only see him being dragged away like a lifeless doll by two girls with red hair, one of them dressed in the green ZAFT uniform, the other in red.
"S-Shinn? Lunamaria? Meyrin? What are you guys doing! Put me down!" Cagalli began to pummel at his back as she was carried away helplessly.
"No!" Shinn yelled. "Unlike Prince Athrun, this story can't just sit here and wait for you to think."
Shinn carried Cagalli until they reached a vast field filled with bright colourful flowers. Throwing her down onto the ground Shinn said in a bored tone, "Now run away Princess. Run far, far, FAR away from here. If you don't, your evil stepmother Meer Canpbell will come after you. She's planning to kill you because apparently for some reason her stolen Haro thinks that you're fairer than her. Now I have to go find a fake heart to show as proof that I killed you. See ya." Turning around swiftly, Shinn walked away without waiting for any response.
Sitting in the flower field, Cagalli looked up into the sky. "Just what the heck is going on?"
"A beauty like none other! Hair as yellow as the bright morning sun. An attitude as defiant as a tigress defending her property. A will as strong as an unbreakable boulder!" Athrun yelled out towards the sky. "And the best part about her was her heart! It raged a raging fire that will never fade, never falter! It would fight to the end, and eradicate anyone that got in its way! Yes! The strength in her heart surpasses all!"
"Uh…" Meyrin looked over her shoulder as she and her sister still continued to drag him back to his castle. "You've been saying those things for three hours now. Are you done yet?"
"WHERE THE HELL AM I!" Stamping her feet on the angrily, Cagalli groaned. "What kind of freak world am I in? Who the hell can live in such a tiny house! And would you animals leave me alone already!" she snapped. The animals ignored her and continued to gather more closely.
Walking into the little house, Cagalli found that it was so clean, that she thought she might've been poisoned by it. As she toured the little house, she found seven beds which were each labelled with a name.
"Hmm…" said Cagalli. "Sneezy, Sleepy, Bashful, Happy, Doc, Grumpy, and Dopey… What kind of names are these?"
As she stepped closer towards the seven beds, she realized that there were more names written on them, but it seemed as if somebody had tried to sand it off. "Scrappy, Snappy, Hoppy, Weepy, Dirty, Cranky, and Hungry. Lazy, Dumpy, Flabby, Thrifty, Shifty, Nifty, and Wistful. Graceful, Helpful, Tearful, Awful, Snoopy, Gabby, and Crabby. Silly, Dippy, Sappy, Gloomy, Daffy, Busy, and Dizzy. Hotsy, Jaunty, Puffy, Chesty, Jumpy, Spunky and Biggo-Ego… Are these really names?"
Deciding not to over think about the unusual names, Cagalli turned her attention towards the fridge. Her stomach was grumbling endlessly, so she decided that she needed some food to keep her going… but then again… she didn't know how to cook. Opening the fridge she searched for something to eat but was stumped as she thought of ways to actually cook the food. In annoyance, Cagalli took everything in the fridge and threw it onto the counter.
"I'm sure I could do something with these… let's see…"
Grabbing the container of milk, she tried to open the lid. With all her might she twisted at the little cap, desperately trying to open it. Finally the plastic jug snapped from all the pressure she was applying on it, spewing the contents everywhere, especially on Cagalli. Her dress was now soaked with milk and dripping on the floor.
However, rage had not yet kicked into Cagalli's mind. She stood holding the now empty milk jug in her hand, staring at it as if was the most interesting thing in the world. Her eyes glazed over as she dropped the jug remains onto the milk covered floor, walked over to the jars containing various jams, dumped them into a cauldron, added flour, salt, sugar, pepper, and every other spice imaginable, then added in all the other contents of the fridge that she had taken out. Once she did this, she lit the fireplace to heat the cauldron, and then she walked towards the empty glass jam jars and began throwing them around the room in a rage.
"Are we there yet?" complained Grumpy.
"Almost, it's only like two minutes away," replied Doc.
"Hehehehe… yeah… two minutes…hehehe…" mumbled Dopey, as he popped a pill or two into his mouth and swallowed it, his eyes becoming unfocused with a dopey smile on his face.
"We're almost there!" said Happy.
"Umm… yeah…" said Bashful.
"Ah choo… uh oh… Sleepy's on the floor sleeping again…" said Sneezy. He poked at Sleepy with a stick, making Sleep stand up and start walking while still sleeping.
Cagalli looked over at the cauldron to see that black smoke was coming from it. The smoke quickly spread out through the house, blinding her from seeing anything. The animals had already all run away, but some seemed to be lying on the floor playing dead... or possibly they actually were dead.
Suddenly, the door slammed open.
"Oh no! Our house!" yelled a little boy.
Six miniature people followed the boy in, a look of shock on their faces. As the smoke cleared out, Cagalli came into view. The seven little people covered their mouths and gasped in surprise as they eyed the blonde princess.
Cagalli's eyes opened wide in shock as she looked at the seven little people gaping at her. She slapped herself across the face twice. Rubbed at her eyes, and then pinched her cheek painfully. She returned her attention back to the seven little people, still standing and staring at her. "This can't be real…" she said.
Soon the little house was completely smoke free, and the seven little people went about cleaning the house from the mess Cagalli had made. They scrubbed at the floor to remove food stains, and swept away all the dangerous pieces of broken glass, and they threw away their super high quality cauldron filled with poison (Cagalli's attempt at cooking).
Meanwhile, our blonde heroine was currently locked up in a wooden cage, placed in the corner of the house. She huddled towards the wall, rocking back and forth, still not believing her eyes. The seven little people, were seven known people. The drug addict was none other than Raww Le Klueze. The guy throwing a temper tantrum was Yzak Jule. The laughing one (and making more of a mess) was Mwu la Fllaga. The girl looking at Mwu and blushing was Marrue. The one sneezing every two seconds was Kira. And the girl currently lying on the ground snoozing was none other than Lacus Clyne.
How those seven became miniaturized was beyond Cagalli's comprehension. The instant they snapped out of their initial shock, they charged at her and threw her into a cage like some kind of wild animal.
Her eyes strayed off towards Yzak, who had just dialled a number, and was currently speaking to whoever he called. He glanced over in her direction and gave her an evil smirk before turning back around and continuing his conversation.
Once the room was all cleaned, the seven chibis gathered around Cagalli's cage. Dopey began throwing in pills from bottles and laughing manically. Everyone else just picked up a stick and started poking her.
So there Cagalli sat as the seven little people prodded at her with sticks, the freak showering her with pills, and the occasional sneeze here and there.
"This is the best situation possible isn't it," she mumbled to herself. "I get to be poked at, sneezed at, and showered by pills too."
Finally getting annoyed by the constant attention, Cagalli stood up, and threw the cage aside. As she made her way to the door, she was then pelted by little rocks. Cagalli, being Cagalli, picked up the closest hard object and hurled it at the little people, hitting Kira (Sneezy) in the face, knocking him out cold.
Without a second thought, Cagalli turned back to the door, and was smacked in the face by it as it flew open.
"I forgot how small this house was…" said the cloaked figure as it entered the house.
"Finally," said Yzak (Grumpy). "Took you long enough."
"Aw, don't be so grumpy, Grumpy," replied Mwu (Happy), throwing his arm around Yzak's shoulder. "After all, a girl's gotta take her time to look her prettiest after all."
Yzak threw his arm off and responded, "She's supposed to be in disguise! She's supposed to turn herself into a witch! And there's no such thing as a pretty witch."
The cloaked figure chuckled. "But there is such thing as a pretty witch, Grumpy." The cloak was then thrown off to reveal Meer Canpbell, standing tall and beautiful (and still looking like Lacus) in all her magnificent, queen-like glory.
"Great," mumbled Yzak. "Just what we needed, another idiot that can't follow a script."
"Where is she?" yelled Meer. "Where is Banana Yellow! I have prepared her the most ugly, and disgusting apple. She will pass out from the pure ugliness of this apple, and die from the disgusting taste."
Kira sneezed and regained his consciousness. Lacus yawned. Marrue looked away. Mwu snickered. Raww Le Klueze took more pills. Yzak glared. And Dearka answered, "If Banana Yellow passes out from just seeing the apple, how is she supposed to eat it?"
"Please, don't mind the technical aspects of my plan. I'll make it work somehow."
Kira sneezed again, and Lacus flopped on the floor snoozing away once more. "But," Kira began, "I think (ah choo) that Ba… Ba… (ah choo) Banana Yellow is knocked out behind the door (ah choo)."
Everyone turned their attention to the door, which Meer closed to reveal Cagalli flopping down onto the ground, definitely knocked out cold.
Lacus awoke and said, "A… ha… haaaaaa… I'm so sleepy… good night." She flopped back onto the ground again and slept.
Dearka looked at Lacus, "Was she laughing or yawning?"
The next day, Meer went back to the castle, and Cagalli was placed in the biggest wooden box that the seven chibis could find. She was carried out past the shimmering lake, beyond the flowering fields, and placed in a cold desolate cave on some high mountain.
"Well, farewell fair Banana Yellow," said the seven chibis in unison. They then took off, never to be seen again. But that's because Kira sneezed at the same time that Lacus yawned, Mwu laughed, Raww Le Klueze cried hysterically, and Yzak grunted, causing a mass avalanche to sweep them away into a land unknown.
This same avalanche shook the mountain causing huge vibrations which caused the wooden box containing Banana Yellow to fly out of the cave, all the way to a huge white castle. It broke through the window, shattered the box, and flung the content onto a nice comfy bed, which was currently occupied by a blue haired, green eyed prince named Athrun Zala. To summarize that: various events occurred, leading to Cagalli and Athrun to reunite in the Castle of Orb.
But however, due to lack of funding, the story was cut short. So when Prince Athrun opened his eyes, Princess Cagalli had just disappeared in a flash of light.
Fairy tale lesson number 1: Completely random coincidences happen all the time.
-- to be continued
A/N – It's been approximately half a year since I last updated this… wow… I'm lazy… And just to note, "lack of funding" equals "lack of privacy", so basically every time I tried to write a decent end to this chapter, someone (my brother) would just barge into my room and annoy me to death… So, the ending seems very rushed, but that's ok I guess. But if there's anything confusing that you don't understand, feel free to ask.
Anyways... YAY! Chapter one is complete finally! Now the next mystery is... when will I ever get around to doing chapter two?