Chapter Two- There's No Such Thing as an Unlisted Number.
"Okay! We have Raine checking out all the party supplies, Regal looking at the food, Zelos is testing the odds at the casino..." Genis muttered. "So I guess you and I should start the guest list," he finished, looking up at Lloyd.
"Man, all this planning sucks. Can't we just TP the place?" Lloyd whined.
"Lloyd, have you EVER planned a successful party?" Mithos asked. He'd been there the entire time, just reeeeeeally quiet.
"Um... my fifth birthday party?" Lloyd suggested.
"Didn't your house catch on fire?" Genis asked, half paying attention.
"A mere techni... techniq... techik..."
"Technicality," Genis corrected.
"But whatever! Let's just go do... stuff!" Lloyd pouted.
"After the invitations," Genis chided.
"Yeah. Punkass bitch," Mithos added. Lloyd mumbled something to the likes of 'stop calling me that...'
"Okay, fine, fine!" Lloyd angrily said. "Let's invite some people!" He snatched Yuan rollodex off of the desk, and started flipping around. "Okay... let's see... Mom, Dad, Uncle Sherman, Forcystus, Random Renegade 31691... Oooh! Botta's personal phone line... hey! He's got Yggdrasil's cell!" Lloyd giggled. Mithos froze.
"... Are you suggesting inviting our archnemesis to come to a party at Yuan's base?" Genis asked.
"Uh... well... ... ... Why the hell not?" Lloyd cheerfully exclaimed.
"Because he hates us," Genis pointed out.
"No I do- I mean no he doesn't!" Mithos yelled. Oh, master of cover-ups.
"Huh?" both Genis and Lloyd asked at once. Mithos quickly shut up, and started looking at Yuan's Hello Kitty Stationary. He acted as if he'd never said anything.
"... SO!" Lloyd spoke up. After another small pause, "LET'S CALL HIM!"
"Why!" Genis asked, annoyed with Lloyd in general.
"Well, like I said. Why not?" Lloyd explained, a clueless grin on his face.
"... You know what, I'm through arguing with you. Just call him!" Genis rolled his eyes.
"O-KAY!" Lloyd declared, picking up the Mickey Mouse phone also on Yuan's desk. After dialing a few numbers, Genis looked at him incredulously.
"I didn't think you were gonna do it!" he whined. Lloyd made a motion for him to shush.
"It's ringing..." Lloyd muttered. At the exact same moment, the annoying cell-phone version of the Desian theme rang throughout the room. The blonde-haired half-elf quickly turned around and pulled out his cell phone.
"Hello?" he quickly spoke into the phone.
"HI YGGDRASIL!" Lloyd yelled into the phone, Mithos winced.
"Lloyd, I'm a little busy right now..." he began.
"... Aren't ya gonna ask how we got this number or where we are or maybe... uh... something!" Lloyd squealed.
"Er... um... sure," Mithos muttered, taking a glance to make sure Genis wasn't looking.
"Right! You see, we're at Yuan's base and we found your cell in his rollodex! Where are you!"
"Uh... I'm... at sea!" Mithos quickly fibbed.
"Ooooh... NIFTY! Where abouts?"
"Just... at sea. Somewhere."
"That's cool... ... Hey, Yggdrasil, why does your voice sound... more girly than usual today?" Lloyd asked. Mithos swore under his breath. He forgot to change his voice!
" Uh... whatever do you mean, you son of Kratos?" Mithos responded, now in his 'masculine' voice.
"Oh... it fixed itself... ... ... Wanna come to a party! We're all here, plus there's Kratos, and this cool kid Mithos, and we're gonna try to invite Botta and some random peeps!" Lloyd explained.
" Erm... I'd really like to, Lloyd, but I can't. It's really bad rep for a villain to be seen clubbin' with his rival," Mithos explained back.
"What!... Man- you went punk! It used to be all about us, homie! But no! It's all about your damn rep! You know what, I hate you, man! I thought we had something special! But no! I hate you!" Lloyd ranted, then slamming the phone back down on the receiver. "MITHOS! You're my new blonde friend who isn't a love interest!" he declared to the crouching half-elf.
"Eh?" Mithos asked, quickly hiding his cell phone. "Er... um... sure! Right-o!"
"... Mithos... what were you doing?" Genis asked.
"Uh... I had a call..." Mithos said.
"Who was it?" Lloyd asked.
"Uh... er... ... ... ... I was ordering pizza!" Mithos quickly lied.
"Really! Yay!" Lloyd screamed. "Hurray for MITHOS! I'm gonna go tell the others!" Lloyd said, running out of the room. Genis gave a little glance to Mithos, before following. As soon as they left the room, Mithos quickly spun around, pulled out his cell phone, and pressed speed dial number 4.
"Hello? Dragon Pizza Palace? I need 16 pepperoni pizzas, ASAP! Put it on my tab!... It's me, Yggdrasil, you idiots! ...And I own your chain! GIVE ME PIZZA NOW!"
-
"hm... what's this?" Lloyd asked, looking at a certain sign in the hall way. "GASP! A MAP! how ever so convenient!" He yelled to himself like an idiot. He scanned the 'You are here' sign trying to find the Kitchen. Than he noticed the dot that said 'You are here' over it. He grew pale as he stared at the font before screaming "OH MY GODDESS! HOW DO THEY KNOW!" then he took off in the direction he hoped was West.
-
Meanwhile, on the completely other side of the base. Kratos, Colette, and Sheena were "testing" the table tennis table.
"Stop using your wings! That totally not fair, Kratos!" Sheena yelled, waving her ping-pong paddle around menacingly.
"Well stop calling upon the power of Origin to land power shots!" Kratos argued.
"Maybe me and Kratos should play? Angel table tennis sounds fun!" Colette said, smiling as usual. Sheena shrugged before handing over the paddle to the happy little angel girl.
"hmph... are you sure Colette...? You could get hurt you know..." Kratos said.
"Oh come on! It'll be fun!" Colette smiled before slamming the ball against the table. Kratos saw the ping-pong ball rocketing toward his face, he braced for the attack only it flew passed his face bounced off the wall behind him and nailed him in the back of the head.
"EEP, KRATOS!" Colette yelled, running over to Kratos and his nasty head wound. "Why do all my friends end up getting wounded!" Colette cried. Sheena laughed on the inside only to cover this up with a concerned face.
"I was simultaneously looking at the ball and it hit me in the back of the head... ... ... NO! that's not impossible!" Kratos rambled, he took his hands away from the back of his head and looked for where exactly the ball ended up after the collision with his head. The ball was sitting across the room near Sheena's feet.
"Hmm.. what's this?" Sheena mumbled noticing a door she hadn't seen earlier. The ball had apparently hit the doorknob and broken the lock, so very convenient since she was now curious to what lie inside.
"Sheena?" Colette asked, innocently. Sheena wiggled the door knob until the door opened. Inside lie a long flight of stairs. Colette helped Kratos off the ground before the headed up the stairs. They climbed for a few minutes in pitch blackness until they reached the top.
"Lights?" Kratos asked, looking around the darkness.
"I got um! I call upon The light of the Heaven!" Sheena being interrupted by the two angels yelling,
"NO! Remember what happened last time!" and tackling her. The three brushed themselves off and stood up, trying to see past the dark once more.
"I found them!" Colette exclaimed grabbing onto the light switch. They were instantly blinded by the mass amount of lighting the area had.
"An... Attic?" Sheena asked, regaining her sight. It was indeed the attic, you could tell this because the whole place was filled with crap. 'Storage compartment' my ass, it was filled with pure junk hence an ATTIC!
"Wow! Look at all this stuff!" Colette said happily as she looked over the mountains of stuff.
"There must be 3500 years of crap up here," Kratos noted.
"Maybe... hey! Look at this! It's a wardrobe!" Sheena said, sparkling. "That means CLOTHES!"
"I wanna go to Narnia!" Colette giggled.
"Uh... Colette... that was just a book," Sheena explained, rooting through the wardrobe. Kratos also walked over and took a peek.
"... Oh my! That's MY pimp jacket!" Kratos declared, yanking out the said jacket. "I KNEW Yuan stole it, I just couldn't prove it to Martel!"
"Uh... Kratos? Could'ja not make references to the ancient Goddess as is she were your boon companion?" Sheena asked, a bit uncomfortable with Kratos' age.
"But... she was!" Kratos earnestly said, clutching 'his' pimp jacket. Sheena sighed.
"Uhm... ... ... guys?" Colette whimpered. The other two turned to look. "Why is this here?" she asked, pointing to what appeared to be a small altar.
"... Oh. My. Goddess," Sheena gaped. The altar was surrounded by candles, and pictures of a certain blonde-haired chosen. There were picture of her as an angel, of her before she started her journey, of her in ALL her special outfits, and even panty shots.
"That's.. disturbing," Kratos muttered, turning that odd shade of green we love so much.
"Uh... did... Yuan make this?" Colette asked timidly.
"No ma'am," came an odd voice from the corner. "Some random renegade, I think."
A three of the group sudden froze, and slowly turned around. Sitting in the corner was an ensemble of musicians, with guitars, and a drummer, and a flutist.
"Uh... who the hell are you guys!" Sheena asked, being the first to regain her composure.
"We're... THE COMPOSERS!" the band said in unison, posing cheesily.
"... and WHO are you?" Kratos asked again.
"We're the official Renegade composers! Like, you know the Renegade theme? That was all us! Yuan's theme? You're welcome! And you know the fight song while you're going against Yuan!"
"That was you?"
"That was SO us!" the guitarist screamed.
"Uh... then why are you in the attic?" Colette asked. "Isn't it cold... and dusty?"
"Well... Yuan got kinda bored of having us follow him around, and we were afraid that if we hit a sudden cold spell he'd eat us for nutrients... so... here we are!" the flutist explained. "And... well... we've been here for 2 years."
"How do you eat?" Kratos asked incredulously.
"We've been eating this messed up cereal we found!" the drummer answered, holding up a cereal box. The box had a chibi Yggdrasil on it and read 'EXSPHERE-O'S!' with lots of bright colors.
"Endorsed by Tethe'alla's Chosen of Mana? Zelos- that SELL-OUT!" Sheena screamed with all her banshee-might.
"Uh... yeah... right. So, you kinda opened the door... and stuff... so... we're gonna leave," the band leader said.
"Hey!... um... we're gonna have a party... do you wanna come?" Colette asked, polite as usual. The band members looked at each other. "Maybe you could play for us!"
"... Yeah, I guess we could jam for you," the drummer nodded.
"Yay!" Colette giggled. "Thank y- Ooh what's that!" the female chosen got distracted and quickly ran over to a box. Sheena kinda slinked over to check.
"... Christmas lights?" Sheena asked.
"Let's put 'em up!" Colette suggested.
"Yeah, that'd be awesome," the band agreed.
"Kratooooooooos? Will you help!" Colette asked, already pulling strings of lights out. Kratos sighed a defeated sigh.
"... Fine."
-
Meanwhile, Genis was still working on the... 'invitation calls.'
"Hello?" the voice of Princess Hilda came through the phone.
"Hello, Princess. Is you refrigerator running?" Genis asked, a wicked little grin on his face.
"... Actually, it isn't. Dad and I had to eat all the ice cream before it melted..." Hilda said, sounding sulky.
"... ... Oh... ... ... Okay, then, you have a good day now, Take c-Luck!" Genis awkwardly finished before hanging up. "Man... that was bad..." Genis muttered. Then he pulled out the rollodex. He dialed a few numbers.
"Hello?" came the old voice of Koton. Genis breathed deeply, and got into his creepiest voice and mood.
"Seven days..."
"OH MY GODDESS!"
-
a/n: Hello folks, Sarah AKA Celebi and Alice Kaiba AKA Saisu are here to say 'lo!
Sarah's Notes: You know, I'm sorry I forgot to mention this... this fiction was co-written- both me AN' Saisu worked on it. I shouldn't take all the credit. It's our excuse to not work on it, we can only do it when she comes over! eheh
Saisu's Note: Yes, we can only work on it when I come over for sleepovers. Then she's all "I need food" "I need sleep" "I need to use the bathroom" "Hay look BottaxYuan Pictures!" "Lets go get a quick snack!" I have to constantly remind her of our DUTY to the angry reviewers. Yes, so thank ME! XD this would not ever get done if it wasn't for my bitch slap of dh00m. And just to tell you, there were OH-SO-MANY jokes we wanted to put into this chapter that never made it... hm... maybe the third chapter will come faster than you think.
Now lets respond to some reviews! (Only the 'respondable' ones):
Renee-ness:
Yes, yes they did. D... And yes, NEKKY KENT.
Balderdash :
Actually, it's my favorite pairing. It's SheelloydlosgalnatoslettenisuanttadylesilseanawaVOLT! Kudos to any who can decipher that.
Night Wind-chan:
Stop reminding meeeeee... yes, we know Otta-Bay is Ead-Day. This is just really set SOMEWHERE within the plot line, before that... and stuff. OR! He didn't actually die! The light of Aska was enough to evaporate the water so that he was simply locked in there! For 30 days he was stranded, eating off the other Renegades for nutrition, until he finally escaped!... Then he went to go farm in Ilia. Where eventually he met Yuan again. And regained his position as co-ruler of the Renegades AKA the one who ACTUALLY does all the work!GASP, Need air now...
Theora:
How did we come up with this? Uh... ... Saisu? How did we? Oh... right... Saisu discovered that there was NO ONE in the Renegade base once you go there of your own free will... then came all the questions, then came this fanfiction.
The Zelda Master:
... We're flattered you likeit!Yeah... forgive us our little grammatical errors. We're just some random 13-year-olds with too much spare time and not enough school experience.
Anyhow! That's all for this time... here's your update folks, I hope you like it and don't stab us for taking so long!