Your beauty so absolute,

your existence so intensive I just have to look at you, see you, touch you, whisper your name

Oh how can you attract me

my eyes, my thoughts, my skin, my burning fingers are dying to touch you

when you're so lost in your own highness?

You're sitting on a big rock with your summoner, you're discussing something and once again I'm not allowed to join in. Just because of my age I have to spend most of my time surrounded by stupid males, including the one you love. The one I hate more than anything. I fantasize about killing him, I've imagined it a hundred times, it gives me some sort of sick wonderful pleasure to see him bleeding on the ground every night in my dreams. You talk with Yunie for an eternity, she seems worried and of course you comfort her. Oh how I sometimes hate my cousin.

You love her so much you would give your life if hers were saved

Maybe that's just what a guardian is supposed to do

But do you know, do you have any idea

that I would give my life a thousand times if you were to stay alive? Do you know?

You must be the coldest woman I've ever met and yet there is this motherly warmness in your affectionate smile when you look at your little summoner, yes, a tender shade in your eyes they are enchanting, almost red, God have mercy they are the most beautiful eyes on Spira. Why don't they look at me like that? Do you ever want to hold me? What if I died, would you even care?

I close my eyes and see you – no, not the real you but the one that loves me in my dreams. She takes me into her arms and I press my head against her soft breasts and she holds me like a mother, like you never do. She cares about me. Truly. She is the object of my waking sexual fantasies and she is my mother and she is the pure white angel taking care of me – underneath that black dress and all the gothic gear I'm sure you really are an angel. She kisses the wounds I've cut into my flesh when thinking of you, when seeing you kiss him, when touching myself and finding pleasure in pain yes, she heals me and you don't even notice.

Are you really just so blind? Are you so devoted to your little summoner and so damned in love with that brainless idiot that you can't even see me?

Would you hear me if I screamed my love to your face?

You turn to look at me with a distant smile on your pale beautiful ice queen face and I know you wouldn't.