Chpt.4- Concerts/ Religion
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Concert Behavior
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1. Always tear your music. This is also a sign of respect to it.
2. If the chair you have is bad (e.g. it leans to one side) , switch it with a french horn or alto saxophone player. Preferably the alto sax.
3. If it ever says "In stand" in your music, be sure to put your stand almost parallel to the ground. Then, when you come to the measure, blast it out.
4. After the last note is played in a piece, drop your trumpet. This will cause humiliation to your director and also is a sign of respect to your instrument.
5. If you ever have time, look around for broken reeds (they don't have to be alto sax. clarinet and baritone sax reeds work just great!) and substitute them for the ones that the a-saxes use. They probably won't be able play.
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Religious Practices
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7. You must pour a whole bottle of valve oil down your trumpet every thirteenth of a month. This way, evil spirits will be washed away.
8. Tie pink and purple feathers to your trumpet case once a month, so that none of the evil spirits will take your beautiful, worshipped, revered trumpet to the shop, where it would be messed up.
9. During concerts, always sit in a green chair. Green chairs seem to ward off any bad luck.
10. Always carry a Pokèmon card with you (e.g. Charmander, Bulbasaur, Squirtle, etc. Pikachu works best). It will protect you from the maimed flute spirits.
11. Raise your stand up high, blocking the band director's gaze. This reflects waves of evil spirits and bad luck.
12. Constantly fall off the stage. This will enhance your tone and your ties to the trumpet god.
* * * * * *
Concert Behavior
* * *
1. Always tear your music. This is also a sign of respect to it.
2. If the chair you have is bad (e.g. it leans to one side) , switch it with a french horn or alto saxophone player. Preferably the alto sax.
3. If it ever says "In stand" in your music, be sure to put your stand almost parallel to the ground. Then, when you come to the measure, blast it out.
4. After the last note is played in a piece, drop your trumpet. This will cause humiliation to your director and also is a sign of respect to your instrument.
5. If you ever have time, look around for broken reeds (they don't have to be alto sax. clarinet and baritone sax reeds work just great!) and substitute them for the ones that the a-saxes use. They probably won't be able play.
* * *
Religious Practices
* * *
7. You must pour a whole bottle of valve oil down your trumpet every thirteenth of a month. This way, evil spirits will be washed away.
8. Tie pink and purple feathers to your trumpet case once a month, so that none of the evil spirits will take your beautiful, worshipped, revered trumpet to the shop, where it would be messed up.
9. During concerts, always sit in a green chair. Green chairs seem to ward off any bad luck.
10. Always carry a Pokèmon card with you (e.g. Charmander, Bulbasaur, Squirtle, etc. Pikachu works best). It will protect you from the maimed flute spirits.
11. Raise your stand up high, blocking the band director's gaze. This reflects waves of evil spirits and bad luck.
12. Constantly fall off the stage. This will enhance your tone and your ties to the trumpet god.