Author: GrapeSmshr
Rated: M
Coupling: HP/SS slashy goodness
Disclaimer: As much as I wish it were so, these charas don't belong to me.
A/N: Haha, bet you all thought I gave up on this fic, didn't you? Well, I kinda did... but only temporarily (temporarily being almost a year, apparently). But I'm back! I'm not gonna bore you with excuses, even though I have some. I just have one thing else to say: read on and enjoy!
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Chapter 4: Advantages
Harry was quite ready to leave Poppy's overenthusiastic care that evening. He had been in the infirmary for seven days now. The first two had been spent in a potion-induced slumber while Poppy seemingly administered every kind of test and healing magic imaginable just as a precaution.
The following few days were spent being visited by the Weasleys--minus Ron, Charlie, Percy, and Ginny, who were casualties of the war. He had also been swamped with his old house- and year-mates, not to mention all of the professors, save one.
Severus had not stopped by to see him, not once.
On one hand, Harry could understand his staying away. Harry seemed to always be surrounded by people, so it would be difficult to have a meaningful exchange of words without kicking everyone else out. On the other hand, though...
Harry just missed him.
It was somewhat of a mind-boggling transition. He had spent almost every single day with the man in the past year, either on missions or training or even taking the occasional breaks to mellow out and siphon off some of the stress.
And it had been a week since seeing him.
Was he being avoided? It was a ridiculous notion, yet it had some merit. Showing up out of the blue like that, brought back from the grave? Yes, he could imagine how that could throw a person off. Hell, he was pretty thrown off as well.
Having been in the infirmary for so long, even breezing in and out of consciousness over the past week, it gave him more than enough time to ponder the recent... events he had just been through.
It really was quite funny, actually, in a morbid kind of way. He had always had these plans for the rest of his life; he would start a career as an Auror, get married to a beautiful and amazing wizard, and live happily ever after.
But then he had died.
If there was ever anything in the world that gave one perspective on his life choices, it would definitely be dying. There was nothing like an untimely death and magical resurrection to allow someone to see the world in a different light. And Harry most certainly did.
Maybe it was the fact that he had died defending the world from evil. Whatever it was, Harry no longer had any desire to be an Auror. His days of living in peril were over. And he had long ago given up on the adolescent fancy of joining the professional Quidditch leagues. He loved to play, but never for a living.
He had his entire life ahead of him. A second life. A second chance. And what was he doing with it? Nothing. For the first time ever, he had no clue what the rest of his life would hold. He had always had someone telling him what his next course of action would be, whether it be the Dursleys, Albus, or even Severus. Now that he had the power to make his own decisions, he had no bloody idea what he should be doing.
And he loved it.
Now that he really pondered it, maybe it was a good thing, his oblivion to any future plans. He had always been adventurous--reckless, even, if he were candid--but it was always with an underlying purpose. It would be refreshing to know that his characteristic adventurousness would not lead to the downfall of the Wizarding world with one false move. Harry planned on making up for his misspent youth. Just how he would accomplish this, he wasn't quite sure. But he would, in spades.
And he wanted Severus's company when he did so.
That was the one aspect of his future that he was certain about. He wanted Severus not just present but playing an important and cherished role, like he had before. And if that was his only certainty at the moment, then he would be happy with it.
Now all he had to do was find the surly man and let him in on the revelation. Harry knew that when Severus didn't want to be found, he couldn't be found--except by Harry. With either great stupidity or great trust, he had revealed to Harry the whereabouts of his self-induced secluded getaway. Fueled by determination, Harry set out for the lengthy trek into the heart of the dungeons.
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Stopping only long enough to take a generous drink from his brandy snifter, Severus resumed his pacing in front of the musty, disused fireplace. His right hand clutched a small rectangular paper; his left hand gestured sharply with his unspoken thoughts.
Having learned from Albus that Harry would be released from the infirmary that evening, he knew with no uncertainty that he would be receiving a visit from the younger man. And he would undoubtedly be incensed.
It wasn't that he didn't want to visit Harry. That could not be further from the reason. He was just... scared. Which was completely and utterly stupid, he knew, but he felt that way nonetheless.
After the initial shock wore off and mind-numbing realization set in, he had accepted Harry's death. He hadn't come to terms with it, but he had prepared for the worst when they went into battle. And when the worst happened...
But there was no need to dwell on that now.
Harry was alive!
Severus stopped pacing, snorting in derision as he noticed how one of Harry's nervous quirks had transferred to him. He sat down in an overstuffed armchair, raising the paper in his hand.
It was a photograph taken from the Yule ball. He had been griping at Harry for some reason or another, probably about how he had been coerced into chaperoning the blasted event. Harry had only smiled at him. Not a placating smile, but a genuine smile.
There had been a large collage of pictures of Harry in the Great Hall. Everyone was encouraged to taken any pictures that spoke to them, and Severus had taken that snapshot when no one was around to see him. It was his last desperate attempt to hold on to the man whom he had grown to deeply care for. His last piece of the man.
But he didn't need it now. He could see Harry any time he wanted.
Unless he alienated Harry by not visiting him...
Oh Merlin, what if Harry didn't want to see him? He had been only selfishly brooding in his own thoughts and hadn't much considered what Harry must be feeling.
And he knew Harry. Very well. Enough to know that there was no one that Harry would feel comfortable enough with to pour his heart out to. Except for Severus himself.
And he had been avoiding Harry.
With a disgusted growl, Severus picked up the snifter and flung it across the room, not even relishing in the loud shatter it caused. He may have very well ruined what would potentially have been the best thing that ever happened to him. He needed to find Harry, needed to clear things up.
But before he could even consider a plan of action, the door to the room burst open, and in charged Harry. A sharp flick of his hand, and the door slammed with a resounding bang.
Harry wasn't angry, no, but he wanted answers. On why he was being avoided. On what had been developing between them before the battle. And why was Severus staring at him like that?
Having never been one to pass up opportunities when they were presented to him, Severus decided to tell Harry how he was feeling the only way he knew how. Photograph fluttering to the rug, Severus strode across the room and took Harry in his arms, embracing him as if he would disappear again. For all he knew, Harry would.
Holding on just as tightly, Harry was somewhat comforted by the slightly trembling form of the older man. Yes, Severus had missed him. He had probably not stopped in to visit Harry for some inane, pointless reason, but Harry didn't care. It didn't matter now. He wanted to say something, anything that could further comfort the man, that could comfort them both, but there was nothing to say.
And Harry quickly forgot any words when Severus leaned away just enough to dive forward and press his lips to Harry's with all of the fire in his soul.
The emotional shudders turned to an overwhelming hum that curled over Severus's toes and raced up his body, crackling energy and pure, raw magic, transferring that to Harry, who all but collapsed in the powerful embrace.
Time passed by in fractions of years, of overstretched minutes and endless seconds as the two clung to each other so desperately that not even Merlin himself could have pried them apart. But as the heady sensation of pure bliss gave way to the heady sensation of needing to breathe, they relinquished their lips from one another but not their arms, which held their bodies so tightly together that it was impossible to distinguish where one body ended and the other began.
Anything that Severus had intended to say would apparently remain unspoken, but Harry didn't seem to mind. All of that worrying, the agonizing over Harry's presumed thoughts, had instantly ebbed when the younger man burst into the room. Severus couldn't deny that his impromptu decision to quell any animosity without verbal explanations wasn't a disaster, if the way Harry was gently sucking on his neck was anything to judge by.
Moaning in dulcet baritones, Severus's hands pressed urgently into Harry's back as the moist heat grew most insistent on his sensitive flesh. "Harry..." he breathed, sucking in sharply as those talented lips continued their delicious ministrations on his collarbone.
Slowly pulling away, Harry pressed one last lingering kiss to Severus's jaw before stepping back and saying, "I know." He grasped the older man's hands tightly, offering him a gentle smile.
"I just..." Severus couldn't find the right words to give justice to what he was feeling, what he wanted to say. There was so much, but he had never been one with words, unless he was trying to instill the wrath of Salazar into an unsuspecting pupil. But this was quite the different situation, and he didn't want to say the wrong thing.
But Harry didn't need any explanations. He could look at Severus's expression, at his actions, and know exactly what he was thinking, what he was feeling. There had always been an uncanny bond between them; first in their usual dispositions to insult one another, then in friendship, and now in... whatever was developing between them. Harry was going to take full advantage of his second chance. He deserved some good fortune. So did Severus.
Tugging him out the door, Harry said, "I just, too." He almost laughed at the wave of relief that considerably lightened the contemplative frown. He wasn't about to make Severus say anything he wasn't quite ready to put into words. Besides, the old adage of actions speaking louder was definitely working to their advantage in this situation.
Leading the older man through the labyrinth of winding corridors, Harry tried desperately to catch his breath. He felt an almost juvenile surge of adrenaline rush through him at the thought of his feelings being reciprocated. There had been an infinite number of reasons why Harry had kept his feelings to himself before. Namely, the war played a large part of that. Of course, his untimely death hadn't been helpful, either. But now that both of those were out of the way...
Upon reaching the correct portrait, Harry murmured the password which had so trustingly been bestowed upon him by the quarters' owner. Such a trust had become necessary once Harry was plagued daily and nightly by literally blindingly painful visions. Poppy could only do so much, which, unfortunately, did nothing at all for Harry. Severus frequently spend his days caring for the incapacitated teen, coaxing potions into his trembling body and monitoring him for any signs of dangerous hemorrhaging, which had occurred on more than one occasion. Harry really did owe his life to the man a million times over.
Settling down into the comfortable sofa that has served as his makeshift bed many a time, Harry pulled Severus down next to him and draped himself over the man, one leg thrown over Severus's lap, one arm stretching across his torso to the opposite arm of the sofa, effectively blocking the man in.
Harry was finished with standing idly by and watching life pass. He was through wasting time. And if the intense stare he was receiving in kind was any indication, he would surmise that Severus felt the same way.
"Harry, we need to talk," Severus began.
"I agree. But let's talk later." Giving no time for arguing, Harry seized Severus's lips with his own. Tiny waves of pleasure rolled over him as he was pulled fully onto Severus's lap. Whenever he was around the man, Harry always felt their connection physically, even when they were across the room from one another. Now, to be so close... Harry's body was thrumming with magic, crackling with lightning kisses and sparking caresses. It was as if their years of hating each other had been fuel for such an intense explosion of emotions.
As Harry pressed himself more fully against the potions master, he was rewarded with a rumbling growl that made Severus's smooth column of throat vibrate against Harry's lips. Needing no further encouragement, Harry's nimble fingers wasted no time in divesting both Severus and himself of their robes and shirts.
Now it was skin against skin, pale to pale, both canvases to various patterns of scars, both chests heaving from the friction of their proximity. The heat escalated as the space between them grew less and less.
Tearing his mouth away from Harry's, Severus ignored the confused murmur of protest and guided the younger man off the sofa and, reluctantly, his lap, and led him into the bedroom.
Using full advantage of his sprightly youthful energy, Harry pushed Severus onto the bed and settled his own weight on Severus's thighs. While his mouth roamed over every available inch of flushed skin, his hands deftly moved to unclasp Severus's trousers. Following the path of his hands, Harry's lips trailed down the slowly exposed skin. He paid special attention to the hollow behind Severus's left knee, which made the man gasp out strangled whimpers whenever Harry's tongue tickled over the sensitive flesh.
Making his way back up to Severus's mouth, Harry cried out in surprise as he was flipped over, and Severus insistently ground their hips together. Leaning over, Severus whispered hotly against his ear, "You're such a tease, Mr. Potter."
Before Harry could even register that comment, Severus had quickly rid them both of their remaining clothing. Then Harry felt tight, wet heat enclose around him, and his brain function started wavering. He growled in frustration as his hips were held unmoving by Severus's firm grip. As that graceful tongue swirled over and around him, he began to feel a white hot ball of energy grow in the pit of his stomach and spread throughout his entire body. Waves of fire threatened to engulf him as Severus pulled away and pressed a cool, slippery finger into him. It was soon joined by another finger, stretching the sensitive, puckered skin and making Harry fidget uncontrollably. "Severus... please..." he whimpered.
And in one swift movement Severus was inside of him, inside of that deliciously tight body. Giving a moment for both to adjust, he began to rock his hips rhythmically, pulling out almost fully before slipping back into Harry.
As Harry rocked more insistently against him, Severus increased their pace until they were both panting and moving furiously in time. Severus climaxed first, holding tightly onto Harry as he did so. The violent shuddering in Harry's body made stars explode behind his eyes as he too was sent over the edge.
Pulling out of Harry, Severus collapsed beside him in a breathless heap. And here he thought Harry was going to be angry, that they would have a row. Apparently taking the initiative worked quite well for Severus. He would have to do so again.
Frequently.
He sighed as Harry's warm, nude body draped over his own. Placing an arm around him, Severus murmured, "I still intend to have that talk in the morning."
"Mmargghl," Harry muttered unintelligibly. He pressed a chaste kiss to the damp chest he was using as a pillow. "G'night, Sev."
"Cheeky brat," Severus said with affection before tightening his hold on the other man and waving his hand to spell out the lights.
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Ah, young love... er, lust... er, love... Either or, who cares! There was shagging!
I sooooooo apologize for my disappearing act on this fic. I do intend to finish it up, most likely with one more chapter. I am also currently working on the next chap to Born To Be Wild, if anyone is following that, so it may take a little while to get them posted. But rest assured, it will be less than a year! I promise!
Thank you endlessly to anyone who is still reading this, and to any new readers. I love and appreciate my fanbase, more than anyone knows. It's the reason I've been rushing to get this new chapter finished.
From the last two chapters, anyone who reviewed now has a shirtless and/or trouserless Sev. Of course, he has been so for almost a year, and I would imagine he is quite chilly, so my gift to those who review this chapter is an extremely large, fluffy bed for which to use however you would like with your shirtless and/or trouserless Sev.
Okie doke, I'm outta here, off to start the next chapter! Peace out!