Disclaimer thing: I own naught. Yawn. Moving on...
This story is loosely based on true events. There may be a few of you that read this and say, "Hey! This sounds familiar!" that's because some of material are either the actual quotes or paraphrased versions of real conversations with my friends. Those people, you know who you are, I hope you aren't offended by me using you in this fic. Please don't kill/sue/harm me in some painful way!
Ah yes, and if you think anyone's out of character, well, I'm sorry, Mr(s). Nitpicker. I tried.
Oh, and if anyone makes some lame crack about how "puberty hasn't been kind to her mental state", I'm going to break some noses. But not mine. Okay? And maybe sic my fangirl side on yew. You don't wanna get on her bad side, trust me. She'll get medieval on your...ah, you get the point, I'm going on with the story now.
Right, now, everything's ready...
Sheena flipped through the book until she got to the page she wanted.
"Sheena?" a little voice whimpered, half wanting to be heard, and half wanting to disappear.
Sheena turned to see Colette holding the door open, clearly in tears.
"I...I'll leave if you want to..."
"No, of course not," Sheena got up to lead her friend inside. "What happened?"
Colette sat on the ground, trying to compose herself. "It's just that...I don't feel like myself anymore. It's like I wake up and I'm a different person."
Sheena lifted the hair away from Colette's eyes and handed her a tea rag. It wasn't much, but she seized it gratefully.
"After the angel transformation, I...I thought I was done changing. But now...I'm changing on the inside, the way I think about things...and the way I think about...Lloyd." Her tears came back afresh. "I'm sorry, Sheena!"
Sheena patted her shoulder reassuringly. "Don't be. This is much more important than what I was doing earlier." Off-handedly, she wondered how she understood any of what was being said. An ordinary human being should have been lost at the first three words, she was blubbering so incoherently. "Go on?"
Colette hung on to the tea rag as if it held a piece of her soul. "And I see you stand...sitting there, like some graceful swan, and I'm just a clumsy little gosling that only exists to make you look better."
"No, no, of course not," Sheena wiped her eyes with the tea rag. "There's people that like 'graceful swans', like you say, and people that like little goslings like you."
Colette stared into Sheena's eyes with a vacant expression. Sheena wondered if she said what she meant right.
"Pedophiles?" Colette squeaked.
"No! That's not what I meant!"
Colette sighed, sobbing as she exhaled.
"I meant that there's someone out there for everyone, and it doesn't matter how you look. You should have learned that a long time ago."
Colette nodded, staring at her hands.
"You're not finished," Sheena observed.
Colette took a deep breath and let it out before continuing. She turned her head away shyly, so that she no longer faced Sheena. "I can't really describe the way I feel. It's like everything I knew has been turned upside down. Before, I thought of him perhaps nothing more than a close friend, but...everything's so different now. I want to be with him, but I was taught never to...love someone. They were afraid I might forsake my duty as Chosen to be with him."
Sheena listened in keen interest. The Chosen, who was the world's martyr, couldn't love? It didn't make any sense. If she loved no one, then she wouldn't sacrifice herself. Wasn't it all based on that? To become Martel's vessel to make the world a better place for her friends and loved ones?
"But I just can't help it! I want to be with him, but I can't, and...and...oh, I don't know. Everything's so confusing!"
Colette wrung out the tea rag before unleashing her torrent of tears.
"There, there," Sheena reassured the poor girl. "You have to realize you're not superhuman. You're just a confused teen in one of her 'stages'."
Colette sniffed, staring into her eyes again.
"Stages?" she yelped. "There's more after this?"
Sheena nodded. "Believe it or not."
Colette attacked the nearest thing at hand, a pillow, with surprising ferocity. Feathers, powder, cloth, and curses flew. When the dust settled, Colette lay breathless, exhausted by her sudden outburst.
"Are you alright?" Sheena asked tentatively.
"I want to stay the same," Colette panted. "Don't wanna change. Too much...at once..."
Sheena knelt near her, offering a hug. Colette wept in her arms.
"No more..."
Sheena stroked Colette's head. She flapped her wings sadly, taking comfort in the simple gesture.
"What would anyone see in me?" Colette whimpered. "I'm a failure, weak, good-for-nothing. Can't do anything to save anyone's life..."
Sheena couldn't think up of anything to say.
"What do you see?" Colette breathed, looking up at her. "Be honest," she said, with more courage than she felt.
Sheena held her at arm's length, studying her. The angel looked nothing short of a mess. But underneath it all, her innocent purity and quiet beauty still showed.
"I see...a sad little girl who needs a teacake," Sheena reached under the bed and took out a small lacquered box. "I think you'll like this one." She handed her a small, sweet-smelling pellet in the shape of a flower. "I'll be right back. Don't move, okay?"
Colette nodded, holding the little thing in her hand and wondering how it could make her feel better.
Sheena knocked on the door. "Colette, you still in there?"
There was no answer. She opened the door silently. "Colette?"
"Shnna, 'f eyyye dyeee, 'm gnna kll yuuu!"
Colette lay on the floor, clawing at her throat and wheezing. She rolled over, trying to cough whatever-it-was out of her mouth.
"Colette? What happened?" Sheena propped her up into a sitting position.
"Tyeee...cayyyk..." Colette hacked.
"You ate the teacake?" Sheena asked in horror.
Colette nodded weakly.
Sheena groaned and reached for the teapot. "Take this kind-it'll drown out the sweetness."
Colette downed the stuff in one go.
"Blahhh!" She stuck her tongue out in disgust.
"Sorry, it's my fault for not telling you," Sheena apologized. "I don't know how it is at your place, but in Mizuho, a teacake is something you put in a cup of hot water and it makes you tea."
"Not something you eat with tea?" Colette rasped, reaching for another cup.
"Nope."
Colette drank in silence.
There was a polite knock on the door and Lloyd poked his head in.
"Dinner in a few. Don't spoil your appetite with all that tea."
"Yeah, yeah." Sheena waved a hand to tell him to get out.
"Okay, just reminding you." With that, he left.
Colette made the strangest of noises and tried to drown herself in the teapot.
"Colette! Get a hold of yourself! What is it this time?"
Colette gasped, trying to find her voice. "I don't know. Seeing him just reminded me about how miserable I am." She sniffled and hid her face.
"Aww, come on, Colette, don't cry anymore," Sheena worried. "You're going to dehydrate yourself and shrivel up like a prune."
"Maybe I want to!" Colette snapped. "That way I won't have to be so confused all the time!"
"Colette," Sheena said firmly, shaking the girl. "Don't give Lloyd another reason to worry about you. He cares about you very much, and if he knew about this, I bet he'd drop everything to be with you. So stop crying and be strong, if only for his sake."
Colette choked. "Maybe I don't want to be strong. Let someone else be for a change. Besides, he likes you."
Sheena blinked. "Say what?"
Colette tried valiantly to keep her tone under control, but it came out icy. "You've seen the looks he gives you. You're the dashing, otherworldly beauty. I'm just a plain little girl that won't grow up. I mean, just look at me!" she rolled on the floor with no difficulty. "I'm completely flat!"
Sheena stopped Colette's rolling before she knocked into something. "Well, having a full figure isn't very pleasant either. I can't cross my arms right. Colette, he doesn't love me. You silly gosling, it's you he wants."
Colette stared blankly in front of her, contemplating. She sighed and she rested her head on the wall. "Really?"
"Really really."
Colette half-smiled, relieved she wasn't the only one that thought or hoped so. Her hands clung to the wall, preventing her from falling. "I'm...afraid to love him...tried telling him about it...a few times. But always comes out so...awkward."
She dug her nails into the wallpaper and sighed again before continuing. "I don't want to rush things, but...I wish we were more than just friends sometimes."
That said, she brought her hands down to her sides, peeling the wallpaper off as she did so.
"Oh, why does everything have to be so complicated?" Colette burst in a completely different tone than a second ago and continuing her mindless destruction of the wall. "Boys are so stupid!"
Our vandalism costs are going to be monstrous...
Sheena thought for a minute as she gathered her response. "Well, they're not stupid...they just need to grow up sometimes."
Colette glared at the ceiling. "But some men never grow up..."
Aha, biscuits...
Zelos carefully reached out for one.
No one will ever know...
He sneezed unexpectedly.
Genis was there in an instant, ready to protect his prized biscuits he worked so hard on. He snarled and waved a ladle at the intruder.
Zelos backed up. "Don't you hiss and raise your hackles at me, brat."
Genis growled threateningly. Well, at least, he meant it to be, but it sounded anything but. "Mine!" he cried defiantly, carrying his cuisine away somewhere safe.
Awww, man! If I hadn't sneezed right then, I would have gotten away with it! What was that sneeze about, anyway?
((If you don't get this joke, in Japanese culture (and maybe other Asian groups) they say if you sneeze for no apparent reason, someone is talking about you behind your back. If you still don't get it, then you're denser than I thought.))
Colette yawned kittenishly and inched back to the bed. "Tea always makes me sleepy. I dun wanna go back to my room. 'S late."
"Alright, fine, but if you snore I'm throwing you out." Sheena placed her on the far end. "And I get this half, okay? No exceptions."
Colette shifted into a more comfortable position and nodded sleepily.
"Do you want any dinner?"
Colette twitched her head 'no'.
"Well, if you're hungry, just yell or something." Sheena tiptoed out the door.
Colette curled up and snoozed peacefully.
Sheena woke up sore...and on the floor.
"What? Colette, what happened?"
Colette stretched and rolled over. "You snored."
Sheena growled in a friendly way and pulled on the little angel's hair. "I didn't say it applied to you!"
Colette squeaked and tried to bat her assailant away.
"So...feeling better?"
Colette nodded. "By a lot. I'm sorry I bothered you."
Sheena cuffed her lightly. "Stop beating yourself up about it. When someone's down, they have to talk to someone, right? I don't really mind, anyway."
Colette purred happily and got off the bed.
"Do you still have any teacakes? I want one..."