Hope you enjoy, this is my first fan fic so please don't flame me!
PrologueI sighed in irritation. Yet again the lift was out-of-order. So, with my arms full of shopping, I began to traipse up the stairs.
'Can I help you?' said an amused voice. I manoeuvred my shopping bags around until I could see who was speaking to me. The guy was dark haired, tall, handsome and very muscular. Great. Yet another man who thought I couldn't handle myself. But wait, this was shopping. Ha, serve him right if I said yes.
'Sure, I'm on the second floor.'
'Me too.' He gave me a slight smile and took two of my bags for me. Mystery man began to walk up the stairs, two at a time. Ugh, show-off. I opened the door to my apartment and the hunk followed me in to dump the bags on the counter.
'Thanks.' I held out my hand, 'I'm Stephanie Plum.' His handshake was warm and firm.
'I'm Danny Tinfel. Me and my partner just moved in opposite your apartment. Know any good food places?' I smiled at Danny, of course I knew good food places, this was Jersey!
'You two like pizza?' Danny nodded, 'Nick practically refuses to eat anything else.'
I laughed, 'I'm sure I'll get along well with her then!' Danny hesitated a moment before saying 'Him.' I blinked in surprise, then rolled my eyes. Typical, probably Nick was drop dead gorgeous too. Danny threw his head back and laughed, that was when I realised I'd spoken out load. Damn, I thought, I gotta quit doing that.
When Danny stopped laughing he looked surprisingly nervous. Waiting to see what I was going to say about a gay couple moving in opposite me.
'You'd better watch yourselves with the seniors that live here.' Danny looked at me for a beat then said, 'homophobic?'
'Nah, its just that they get real curious and once word gets out that you're gay you're going to be bombarded with questions about gay sex.'
A small smile drew across Danny's face, 'I can handle curious seniors, thanks for the warning though.'
'You and Nick wanna have pizza and watch the game round here tonight? You probably have boxes everywhere.'
'Thanks Stephanie, I'm sure Nick'd like that.'
'Call me Steph. Come on over whenever.'
I watched Danny leave. Danny's slight hesitation suggested to me that Danny and Nick had had some trouble with homophobes in the past. Tough break, Danny seemed like a decent guy. Which got me to thinking about the other guys in my life, who I'm not really sure could be called decent.
After the whole Slayer mess, Ranger, my mentor, tormentor and general bad-ass, had told me I could stay in his apartment on Haywood until I got mine back. Which would have been really interesting except he got a call and then five minutes later he was out the door on his way to a meeting with his partners, who I called the Justice League. I stayed in Batman's apartment for five days, searching for clues that would lead me to the Batcave. I turned up nothing. So now I was back home. Yay. As for Joe Morelli, well – where do I begin? So I've figured out that I love him, so that's good right? Except I'm not sure I'm in love with him. And that's bad. During the Slayer thing Joe had told me that the only way to get back with him was to change my job, maybe to housewife. His housewife. Unfortunately I love my job. Stephanie plum – bounty hunter extraordinaire, bring 'em back dead or alive. Except dead was kinda a no no in bond enforcement. But the point was I loved what I was doing. Ok, so the truth is I'm not that great at the job, and I really do attract a large number of psychos and fire bombings but I've also never lost a single skip. So, as far as I can see Morelli and I are kinda at an impasse. And neither of us are able, or willing, to break it.
I sighed. My life is sucky.
At 7 there was a knock on the door, I opened it and smiled. I was right, Nick was gorgeous. 'Thanks.' Said Nick with a wide smile.
'Oh crap. I really have to stop thinking out loud.' Danny and Nick just grinned. 'I've ordered a coupla pizza's, figured you guys would like at least one of them. Beer?'
The pizza arrived soon after and we got into the pizza, game and beer. It was a damn good evening. Nick was some sort of computers whiz, who came from, and still had, money. They chose to stay in my apartment block because it was easy to get to everything. Danny was ex-military, Seals actually. When asked why I hadn't seemed surprised I said that he just had the attitude. He raised his eyebrows, tacitly asking for more information. I ignored it. I wasn't going to explain about Ranger and his Merry men. Not now anyway.
Danny said he was looking for a job in security and before I knew it my mouth was open, asking him what he thought about bounty hunting. He was willing to give it a go and I said that I'd talk to my cousin Vinnie, who ran his own Bail Bonds Business. The rest of the evening passed companionably. Nick had a wicked sense of humour while Danny was more serious and composed. He didn't tend to talk a lot. Go figure, another silent military type, cos I'm running out of those.
At 8 the next morning I climbed into my new blue ford escape, thank god the insurance from my last ford escape had finally come through. I drove to the office, planning my speech to Vinnie. Half an hour later I'd resorted to blackmail once again, but Danny now had a job on the condition that Danny rode shotgun for me for a while as 'training'.
At 10 Danny was riding next to me, a glock at his back and dressed in a similar uniform to mine, jeans and black t-shirt.
'First up is Sammy Kisello, 29 yr old Caucasian male who was arrested for assault. Says here he beat up his then-girlfriend, Trisha Wels, when he'd had too many.'
'A wifebeater.' Danny growled.
'Yup, and we are going to politely inform him that he missed his court date, ok?'
'Yeah, ok. Polite.'
We drew up outside an apartment block in the projects. Danny looked around the area. 'Pretty.' He said sarcastically. We went up to Kisello's apartment and knocked. The door was opened by a very pretty, very scantily clad, blonde. Whose beauty was currently marred by a big black eye.
'Hi, my name's Stephanie Plum. Is Sammy in?'
'Huh, you're that Bombshell bounty hunter. Sammy ain't here.' At that moment a male voice came from the bedroom, 'Who the fuck is it, Cassie?'
'Shit.' Said Cass, and tried to close the door. Ha, I thought, shame the sly BEA has her foot in the door to prevent such things occurring. Danny helped me push the door fully open and we headed to the bedroom.
'You can't go in there!' exclaimed Cass, 'He's naked. And tied up.'
'Saves us the trouble,' said Danny with a smirk.
I did a mental eeyeuuw as we opened the door to see a very naked Sammy trussed up like a in chocolate sauce.
'What the fuck?' said Sammy. I gave him the usual rebooking spiel, as I cuffed his hands. And then I untied the scarf that bound his hands together. Unfortunately, as soon as I undid his legs he was up and running, down the stairs buck naked covered in chocolate sauce. With a yell I ran after him, Danny was close behind me, obviously slightly taken aback by the sequence of events. As I ran down the stairs I pulled my stun gun out of my jeans pocket and checked the juice, fully charged.
As Sammy started to run along the sidewalk I tackled him. He fell down with an oof. Before he could start to struggle I pressed my stun gun against his arm and pressed the button. Zap. Sammy was out for the count. I went back up to his apartment and borrowed a sheet to wrap him in. An hour later I had my payment slip, and half a dozen cop jokes ringing in my ears.
Danny and I climbed in my car. He looked across at me. 'Are many apprehensions like that?'
I sighed. 'Yeah, it's kinda normal for me. Not for anyone else, just me. Does Ranger have to deal with naked chocolate men? Hell no. Does Joyce? Only when she wants to. But me? Yeah. That kinda thing happens a lot.'
'Ranger? Joyce?'
'Ranger is the best there is. Surprisingly, he's an ex-Ranger. Real name is Ricardo Carlos Manoso. But everyone calls him Ranger. He's a good guy, I think. And Hot.' I closed my eyes and thought about Ranger in nothing but those black silk boxer shorts. And then I thought about Ranger in nothing at all. 'Mmmm.'
'Steph?' Danny sounded amused.
'Huh?'
'You're drooling.' I quickly checked, which made Danny laugh. Phew, thank god I wasn't really drooling.
'Ahem. Joyce is...Joyce.' I looked at Danny a moment, considering him. He seemed like a good guy, I liked him and my guts said to trust him. So I went with it.
'Joyce is my arch-nemesis. She's a..a.. - bitch seems to mild for her but that's what she is I guess. An A class Bitch. She was the kid who poured water on you and told everyone you peed yourself. The one that started mean rumours. She was the one I caught screwing my husband on my dining room table before I'd finished unpacking my wedding gifts.' The last sentence came out through gritted teeth.
'What happened with the husband?' Danny asked gently.
'We had the loudest divorce in the history of the burg. He's a lawyer but by the end of our divorce his chances of ever being DA are slim to none.' I put the car in gear and we rolled away from the police station.
'Why did that Cassie girl call you 'The Bombshell Bounty Hunter'?'
'It's what the press call me.'
'Why?'
I sighed, he was gonna find out anyway, better it comes from me. 'My cars get frequently destroyed. They explode, get crushed, firebombed but sometimes they just get graffiti-ed or stolen. My apartment got firebombed once and I was kinda involved in burning down the funeral home. That's why the press call me Bombshell.'
Danny grinned at me, 'when did you lose your last car?'
'About three weeks ago, so this one should be safe for a month at least. You mind if we change the subject? I get cranky when I think of all the cars I lose.'
'Who's Morelli?' Danny asked, 'and why was everyone telling you he was out of town on assignment?'
'Joseph Morelli, vice cop, and another cranky subject. Everyone was telling me he was out of town because he's my sometimes boyfriend and ex-fiancé.'
'Didn't you know?'
'Know what?'
'That he was out of town.'
'No. A coupla weeks ago we split up again and he told me that the only way we'd get back together is if I change my job. So I haven't seen him.'
'Huh.'
'Yeah, straight men are dicks.'
Danny flashed a smile at me, 'yeah, they are.'
I parked the car in our lot. Then I grinned at Danny, 'We're gonna get along just fine.'
'Yeah, Angel, I think we are.'