Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author Notes: This idea came from watching 'The Passion of Conner' episode of DT and has taken this long to properly manifest itself in my head before being allowed to be written. Thanks to Sarafu for her amazing DT fics which inspire me beyond belief, esp 'Where Your Road Leads' and ficets 'Man vs. Myth' and 'Save the Last Dance'. Thanks to AJ – being with you and thinking of you inspired the whole feel of this fic. I thought of you as I wrote and I smiled. Thank you.
Update: Nipped and tucked October 2007
OPEN YOUR EYES
Krista had been off with him for weeks. Sure, she'd been attentive and talkative during all their dates and just as earnest as ever about the causes she felt passionately about. But there was something distant that cloaked her moods as well. She seemed unreachable sometimes and more than once Conner had caught her staring at him with a knowing smile on her face. It was confusing the hell out of him. He honestly didn't know what to expect from her now, despite having been her boyfriend for several months.
"Conner?" her voice brought him out of his thoughts. "I'm going to get a smoothie, you want one?"
"No, I'm good."
With a smile, she pulled her hand from his and got up to go to the counter. Conner watched her leave. She was still as beautiful as when he'd first laid eyes on her. Her skin was paler than porcelain and her eyes sparkled. At times, her fragile beauty was completely at odds with the strength of her views on everything.
"Almost poetic McKnight," he muttered. "Krista's really gotten to you."
His eyes roamed the rest of the Cyberspace. Hayley was serving customers, chatting to a smiling Dr O when she had breathing time. Earlier that day, his wife Katherine had rang to let him know she was returning from a strenuous ballet tour soon. It had put Dr O in an uncharacteristically buoyant mood.
Trent was bussing tables frantically, keeping an eye on Hayley as he did. Ethan sat nearby surrounded by his friends, competing loudly against each other on their laptop computer games. Lastly, Conner turned to the stage and watched Kira perform, softly strumming her guitar. As always it made him smile. She was so talented, and the totally bogus thing was that Kira didn't see it sometimes.
Krista approached him, full glass in hand. She paused as she watched the expression on his face, a smile softening her own. Feeling her presence, he turned to face her.
"You keep doing that! Watching me and smiling!" he accused playfully.
"Conner, we need to talk," she said simply, taking her place beside him.
His heart dropped like a stone and he was instantly on alert. That was what he used to say to girls he wanted to dump. Krista looked at him with compassion in her eyes.
"Do you really want to be with me?" she asked bluntly.
"What? Of course I do!" gaped Conner, taken completely by surprise. "Why wouldn't I? You're beautiful and you're passionate and I always have a great time with you. You really make me think about stuff I never paid attention to before."
Krista smiled her beautiful smile and grasped his hands with hers.
"I love spending time with you too, Conner, and these past few months have been really great. But something's missing. Your passion."
"My passion? What'd you mean?"
"You don't feel passionately about me, Conner, and don't deny it. That's why I've been watching you for a while, to try and work it out," she explained. "The passions in your life are soccer and your friends, but not me."
"You are a passion! Didn't you hear the stuff I listed? You're a big part of my life."
Conner realised how defensive he sounded, but he didn't care. He didn't want to lose Krista. Krista held a hand up to silence him. It was amusement that filled her eyes now.
"I didn't say I'm not part of your life. I know I am. I just don't see the passion you have for other things in your life applied to me and I can't be your girlfriend if you don't feel that strength of feeling for me as well."
"But you've changed me, for the better. I don't wanna let go of something like that."
"Open your eyes, Conner; it's not me who's changed you at all. It's your friends."
"My friends?"
"Kira and Ethan. Since you started hanging out with them, you've really changed. Before you were this selfish arrogant jock. Now I can see you're different. You used to just date cheerleaders all the time and now you're with me and don't pretend that's normal because I know it isn't. You're open to new ideas now and yes, that partly might have been me but they laid the ground work. They changed you from the inside out and I, for one, am grateful."
Conner stared at her dumbfounded, but was overcome with a wealth of memories. Ethan and Kira had changed him. They'd changed each other. Ethan wasn't as defensive as he used to be, wrapping himself up in a prickly shell for protection and Kira had lost some of her blunt nasty edge which had repelled people for so long. Before they'd no one who'd really known them, not even Conner when surrounded by his old jock friends. Now they had each other.
"I still want to spend time with you, Conner," Krista continued gently. "You're a great friend, that won't change. I just can't be your girlfriend when your passion lies somewhere else."
"What? Who?" asked Conner startled, her words penetrating his thoughtful reverie.
"The pretty canary," laughed Krista, cocking her head towards the stage.
"Kira? No way, she's my best friend," protested Conner.
"You really have no idea, do you?" commented Krista with a laugh.
"Idea about what?" Conner asked impatiently, feeling like he was totally missing her point.
"The way you two look at each other, the way you behave together. She's changed you the most."
"How?"
"Where do I start? She's given you tolerance for different types of people. I never thought I'd see you watching her sing or talk to Ethan about the internet. She's changed your preconceptions and made you more approachable. She's the one who's made you a better person, Conner."
"OK, so she's my best friend and she's helped me change. It doesn't mean I want to date her."
"You've never thought of her in that way?"
"She's a girl, sure, and she is beautiful. But she's just a friend."
"Conner, I can see it in the way you two talk and laugh together. Subconsciously, there is something there. There's such potential there and I'm not standing in the way of something so strong. Think about it."
Conner was silent. He raised his gaze to look at Kira with fresh eyes. She was his best friend, could she be more? She was beautiful in her own unique way and she was the only girl he'd ever known who could have interesting conversations with him about anything. She was warm and friendly and fiercely protective. There was love there, for a friend. Conner was surprised to feel something else unfurl inside of him. Something warm coated his heart.
"What would she see in a dumb jock like me?" he muttered out loud.
Krista swatted him hard on the arm in response.
"Have you heard a word I've been saying? You're not just a dumb jock anymore, Conner. I'm sure of that," she replied.
"She has Trent."
"Had Trent. Do you see the way they look at each other? They're just friends, Conner. Whatever they had before has died for some reason. You're the one who looks at her the way he used to now."
"I don't know..."
"Look, I'm not saying I'm right, I'm just telling you what I see. Give it a chance. Don't close yourself off just because she's your friend. She could be so much more," Krista implored. "The Winter Formal's coming up, ask her to it. Ask as a friend if you like. Tell her you and I broke up and take her. Tell her how you feel."
"And how do I feel?"
"You'll know," Krista smiled. "Just open yourself up to the possibility, ok? Promise me you will."
Conner smiled back at her. It was conversations like this which had attracted him to Krista in the first place. Her passion just shone through. Now though, she was just Krista. Wonderful Krista, who'd known before him what he was feeling. Someone so wise and lovely, but Conner knew inside now that she was just a friend. He pressed a kiss to her cheek.
"I promise," he confirmed. "Thank you, Krista, for being an amazing friend."
"Thank you, Conner. I've had a great time with you, but out time together is done. I'll always be your friend, ok? Now go ask her."
"Now?!"
"As good a time as any. She's finished her set so go seize the day."
She gave him a little shove and Conner grinned. He got to his feet and was surprised to find his heart thundering in his chest. Maybe Krista was right. After all, they did have special bonds. He felt the manacle bracelet heavy on his wrist. Feeling strangely calm now, he strode towards his friend.
"Wow, the hall looks great!" exclaimed Ethan.
"Sure does," agreed Kira as she gazed around.
Even Conner had to admit the committee had done a good job this time, managing a whole Winter Wonderland theme with minimum tackiness. A band was playing loudly on stage and the floor was already full of couples or groups dancing. He, Ethan and Kira had decided to come together and had met outside school to enter as a group.
"Look there's Dr O!" observed Kira happily. "And Kat, she looks great."
"Who knew Dr O could get so lucky?" joked Ethan, earning a hard nudge in the ribs from Kira. "Hey! It's true!"
Their teacher was stood leaning against the wall, dressed entirely in black. The only flash of colour was a green necktie. Katherine stood beside him in a beautiful strapless pink dress which cinched in at the waist and her blonde hair shone down her past her shoulders. They both looked very happy.
"Anyone want a drink?" asked Conner.
"I could do with a cup of punch," replied Kira, still captivated by the hall.
"I'm good, dude," added Ethan, already walking into the crowds.
With a nod, Conner wandered over to the drinks table. His mind was swimming. Ever since talking to Krista, he'd been bombarded by thoughts of Kira. All sorts of feelings inside of him had been unleashed. He was seeing Kira differently; as potential girlfriend material. It was very unsettling. Maybe she was even his soul mate.
She was something special; something different to any other girl he'd ever met. She made him feel different too and Conner knew he wanted to explore that further. Tonight, he was going to tell her and he was nervous. Conner didn't get nervous when it came to girls, so this was bad.
"Spacing out, McKnight?" a teasing voice interrupted his thoughts.
Conner jolted and found himself looking at Krista. She was looking gorgeous in a long black satin dress which fitted her figure perfectly and lace gloves. Her dark hair was for once tied up and in a long high ponytail.
"You look stunning, Krista," he said sincerely.
"Thank you," she flushed prettily at his compliment. "You look good too."
Self-consciously, Conner looked down at himself. He'd gone for a simple dark suit and for a small swipe of individuality, a crisp bright red shirt. His hair was hopelessly ruffled and untidy.
"So where's your date?" he asked as he began pouring a glass of punch.
"Nowhere. I came solo."
"You're brave."
"Independent, Conner," she corrected. "Anyway, I think I'll go ask Devin for a dance later."
"Devin?" Conner choked out. Krista sent him a reproachful look. "Sorry, he just doesn't seem like your type."
"Look beyond initial ideas, Conner. So he's not too smart, but he's sweet and sincere. He really cared about that tree," replied Krista with almost a wistful tone in her voice which quickly disappeared in the next sentence. "Anyway, it looks like he needs rescuing from Cassidy. She's chewing his ear off again."
"Good call."
"So anyway, how are you doing? Any clearer on how you feel about Kira?"
"A little. She's still just Kira, still my best friend but maybe she could be something more, you know? I can talk to her like no one else," Conner grinned as he realised he was starting to babble about her. "I guess I do feel something since I can't seem to shut up about her. Can't believe I didn't notice sooner."
"Blinded by your friendship," replied Krista knowingly. "That's what I'm here for. Now go talk to her before Ethan or I say something."
"You were the one who told him!"
"I had to have someone keep an eye out for me," she laughed. "Now go. Take care."
Conner watched as she swished off towards Devin and then he headed back to where he'd left Kira. She was stood by one of the walls, watching as Ethan went to ask Cassidy for a dance.
"Here's your punch," he announced, handing her a glass and following it up with a cheesy mock-punch to the chin.
"Gee, thanks," deadpanned Kira, eagerly accepting the glass and drinking from it. "I'm really dehydrating. It's so hot in here. I probably look a mess so no comments ok?"
Conner held his hands up in surrender, privately noting that she looked amazing. The only other time he'd seen Kira in a dress was when that space rock had changed their personalities and she'd turned into Barbie. Now she didn't look fake like she did then. She looked totally comfortable in her own skin and incredibly beautiful.
"Wanna dance?" he managed, as a slow song began playing.
He felt more nervous than he remembered ever feeling before. It was something new. Surprise filled Kira's eyes for a fraction of a second then she smiled and put her glass down.
"Why not."
Conner lead the way into the thick of the crowd and stopped when he found a space. Kira stood and waited for him to move, a small smile on her face. She looked so gorgeous in a vintage canary yellow dress that reached her toes and fingerless mesh gloves. Nervously, he pulled her close and placed his hands on her waist. She put her arms around his neck in response and began swaying to the music, her eyes never leaving his face.
"So I saw you talking to Krista," she started. "What were you talking about?"
"She was helping me see things differently," replied Conner. "And told me to tell you how I feel."
Kira smiled softly at him. For a moment he was knocked out by how beautiful she looked. He couldn't believe he hadn't noticed before.
"And how do you feel?" she challenged playfully.
Conner took a deep breath. He wished he'd drunk some of the punch now that his throat was so dry. Girls didn't have this effect on him; he usually breezed through picking them up. But, he reminded himself, he wasn't picking Kira up. He wanted to date her exclusively, to test the waters for something more. He hoped he didn't freak her out completely. He managed a little cough before he began.
"Not sure. I know I like you," he ventured, almost timidly. "Don't freak on me but I like you a lot, maybe even as more than a friend. I think we should try dating, you know. You're the only girl I can really talk to and you've helped me change."
Kira grinned suddenly at him and shoved him in the chest.
"Took you long enough, McKnight!" she declared. "Do you know how long I've waited for you to say that?"
Conner stared at her slack-jawed. She smirked triumphantly back.
"You knew?" he managed.
"A little. I knew how I felt and just as I was dealing with my feelings, you got together with Krista," she shrugged. "I'm not the type to steal another girl's guy so I waited."
"But all the times we argue and fight. You like me even then?" spluttered Conner in disbelief.
"So what if we argue? At least we've got opinions. We always have fun together and with you, I don't know, I feel kinda safe. I know you won't hurt me," Kira replied. "I'm not saying it'll be perfect, but I'd like to find out. What'd you say?"
Conner pulled her close for a tender crushing hug. He inhaled the warm vibrant smell that was uniquely Kira and was mixed up in her curling arranged hair. He noticed for the first time the cluster of yellow rose buds pinned carefully into its depths. She hadn't been wearing them when he'd met her at the school entrance.
"Where'd the roses come from?"
"Trent. They're a goodbye present."
"Goodbye present?"
"We decided a while ago that we weren't going to work as a couple. I can't properly be with him if I'm still afraid he might hurt me after all he did. He's still one of my best friends though and all the time we've spent together has been discussing the people we care about, counseling each other. Me about you and him about...well look."
Kira suddenly took the lead and whirled Conner around to see what she'd formerly been facing. Trent was easy to spot. He was the only guy in a while suit jacket and necktie, swaying in a sea of black. At Conner's curious gaze, he lifted his eyes and gave a discreet thumbs-up then mimicking Kira's movement, swung his partner round to face Conner. Hayley grinned back at him. She looked so different with all her hair up and in a deep forest green dress that made her look very pretty and feminine. She looked very happy. She and Conner grinned at each other.
"He's liked her for a while," confided Kira, enjoying Conner's expression. "I've been helping him deal. Now he's finally asked her out. That's why he gave me a goodbye present; he doesn't need counseling anymore. It's all kinda worked out for the Formal. Trent got Hayley at last."
"Dr O got to see Kat," picked up Conner, glancing at his very happy science teacher dancing with his pretty wife. "Ethan got Cassidy."
"What's up with that? I thought they decided to just be friends."
"Guess you can't keep away from the people you care about," concluded Conner.
"So who clued you in?"
"Krista," replied Conner, catching sight of his friend dancing with a delighted Devin and nodding her way so that Kira could see her too. "She just knew even if I didn't and ditched me so I could find out."
"Ouch, the great Conner McKnight ditched?"
"I think of it as more of a mercy break-up."
"Sure you do," Kira glanced over at Krista. "Wow, is she dancing with Devin? Huh, who knew?"
They smiled at each other for a long moment.
"Sorry I was so dense," Conner said finally. "Couldn't see past the friendship, I guess."
"And now?"
"Now, I can see you properly and it's helped me realise stuff," Conner gave his friend a reproachful look. "You're not gonna make me go all sentimental are you?"
"Yep."
"No, it's your turn, Yellow. You're the one who didn't tell me you liked me. If you had maybe this would have happened sooner."
"What was I supposed to say, 'hey Conner, you know how we get along so well and save the world together regularly? How about we spend even more time together and go out sometime?' I didn't think you'd want to spend more time with me. We do annoy each other so I thought I'd wait until you possibly said something. Trent told me if you didn't say anything by tonight, then I'd have to. That was the deal if he asked Hayley out."
"I can understand that. It worked too," Conner commented and smiled down at her. "So you want to go out sometime?"
"Sure, we could catch a movie. You wanna go tomorrow?"
"Barring any world-saving emergencies? I'm free."
"It's a date then."
There was a pause as they looked at each other, barely moving. The crowd of couples moved for them. Conner swallowed a little.
"Can I kiss you?"
"In front of all these people?"
"I don't think they're watching, Kira."
"Ok, but one catcall and we're out of this crowd."
He leant down and gently pressed his lips to hers. She tasted slightly of honey and her scent overpowered him. Not wanting to go deeper for fear of embarrassing her, he pulled back to smile at her. She smiled back.
"Worth pursuing?" he asked.
"Worth pursuing."
In the midst of the crowd, Krista smiled and sent a thumbs up Ethan's way. He grinned excitedly back at her, too wrapped up in Cassidy to truly decipher what she was signaling to him. She felt Devin tentatively hold her closer and she smiled into his shoulder. Her work here was done. Sometimes people needed a little pushing and she, Krista, was glad to have been there at the right time to do it. From the expressions on Conner and Kira's faces, they were glad too.
-end