1Title: Tears In Heaven

Author: Demented Marik

Beta: Aishi-Cc

Warnings: angst, tragedy, shounen ai

Pairing: Seto x Jounouchi

Rated: Pg13

Email:

Yu-gi-oh is not mine. Nor will it ever be mine. Sadly enough.

I've been having some rough times lately and this came to me while I was working on some Geometry homework. This fanfic is dedicated to my koi-ness Jinsoku Wolf. How I hope they'll come by and read this piece of work.

Tears in Heaven, isn't mine.

R&R is enjoyed.

Silently, he slipped into the room not making a single sound as he sat himself down into a bright orange hospital chair. How he stared at all the needles, tubes, probes, and all the things that kept him alive. Everything had been so mercilessly shoved into him, not taking care to not bruise the precious skin. What he couldn't understand is why this had been hidden from him! He was powerful there were many ways that Jou could have been helped. However, he didn't want to cause the group worry. Idiot!

Cancer. It was horrible, watching his body writhe in pain. Each breath was a battle for the blonde before him. There was no hope to save him, the doctors couldn't even trace it's origin. All he could do was stand back and watch his lover slowly shut down before his tired eyes. Watching as he continued to battle every single day. Seto felt his hands slide off the arm rests and land in his lap. How hopeless he felt right now, desperate to help the one he loved the most.

Jounouchi reminded him of a piece of paper. It was like one corner was being held into a flame, the edge blackens and decays. Falling to the ground while the fire just keeps burning taking everything down with each passing moment. If one didn't do anything to stop a fire, if they just allowed it continue burning, it would turn to complete ash. Kind of like what he had done, he had known the entire time and just stood back–allowing himself to be burnt to pieces. Now, he was dying and there was not a goddamn thing anyone could do about it!

He cringed slightly and dropped his gaze down to the floor before him. Noticing how white the small tiles happened to be. How bright the entire room was. For someone that was dying it was incredibly cheerful. Sapphire orbs flickered up to look at Jounouchi's pale form before his eyes darted to the machines beside him. The constant beeping told him..there was life in those veins. Upon the bed, he began to quietly stir, small pained sounds escaping parched lips. After a few tense moments he opened his eyes, turning his head to stare at his lover.

"Seto." There was a smile upon his face, even now he looked like a child. Content, in knowing that his dragon watched over him as he slept. How he could smile thought it baffled the brunette immensely, not getting a response Jou sighed. "Don't worry about me..Everythin' is gonna be alright," His voice was firm and for a moment Kaiba dared to dream. Dared to believe that they had a future...then his gaze fell onto the wires. Liar. He told himself and forced himself into a tighter little ball, a ball of misery.

Feeling a light pressure upon his wrist, a smile easily crossed his face. Eyes lifting to meet his lover's before he raised the pale hand up to kiss each finger. Another smile was shared between them both. It was moments like these where his heart swelled with such emotion, knowing that finally he was loved. "Seto-kun..." His hand fell away to land on the brunette's knee, coldness. The sticky clammy feeling of death clung to the blonde. Kaiba felt his throat constrict as he slid the chair closer to the bed, being as close to him as he could.

"What?" His voice came out bitter but that was far from the truth. A rare moment in his life, he was afraid of the male before him. Afraid for him was more like it. Knowing that death was just around the corner waiting for his bloody scythe. A shiver ran down the ceo's spine as he stared down into those sparkling amber orbs, so beautiful. "Do me a favor?" How could he deny him? With a quick glare at the monitors followed quickly by a sharp nod. Anything at all, just so the other was happy during his last moments.

"I want you to sing. Just for me, it's something I'll cherish always. Beside's the radio's broken." Jou's voice cracked and instantly the brunette was filling up a glass of ice-cold water. Splashing some onto the bed sheets he extended his hands a guilty expression rested on his features. "You know I can't sing." Those pleading eyes always seemed to get to him and with a small sound of defeat he looked down. "Onegai..." He scrambled to find something to sing, which was not easy task. Since he figured most modern music was rather disturbing if not disgusting.

Would you know my name if I saw you in heaven

Would it be the same if I saw you in heaven

Those eyes closed again, that small smile gracing his pale chapped lips.

I must be strong and carry on

'Cause I know I don't belong here in heaven

One month ago he had collapsed, that had to be the most frightening thing he had gone through. Being rushed to the hospital, only a few hours later had they all known the truth. How he had yelled at the other young man for hours, going on and on in and endless ramble. The entire time Jounouchi had remained silent, then said he understood and had wished he had said something a bit sooner. Now their hands rested together–neither one knowing where one ended and the other began. Kaiba's eyes closed, concentrating, gobbling up the feeling and locking it away in his soul. Trying to burn his touch into his soul.

Would you hold my hand if I saw you in heaven

Would you help me stand if I saw you in heaven

He had gotten a phone call earlier while working, being told that Jounouchi wasn't going to last much longer. A dumb question had been asked..how much time? Couple of hours at most. Cringing he squeezed the sweaty pale flesh that was interlaced with him. A small squeeze came second's later tears springing to his powerful intimidating eyes. A couple of hours had always been a large amount of time...now it was so shot. He'd do anything to see the other laugh, head tilting back tears of joy streaming down his face. Or the endless banter he received on the telephone. His eyes remained closed, for a moment he panicked. Then realizing that the heart monitor was still beeping in time with the pulse.

I'll find my way through night and day

'Cause I know I just can't stay here in heaven

Kaiba remembered their talks about death and heaven. In the beginning he had figured those things to be absurd, paradise didn't exist. A perfect place where angel's lived and where the blood was lifted from a man's hands. Impossible, there was no such thing as perfection; everything had a couple of flaws. It was human nature. Then after awhile he had realized that Jou was his piece of heaven. The closest he'd get to receiving such a thing. Moisture gathered at the corner of his eyes before sliding down his cheeks in slow uneven streams. His voice continued to echo across the room.

Time can break you down time can bend your knees

Sooner.

Time can break your heart, have you begging please, begging please

If only he had been told sooner. A soft sob escaped his mouth, beginning to pray for the first time in many years. Begging god to allow the other man to live, he wanted to keep him so badly. It was a horrid pain knowing that he was helpless.

Beyond the door there's peace I'm sure

And I know there'll be no more tears in heaven

It'd be cruel though, making him live on machines. Never seeing those loving amber orbs again, or hearing that hearty chuckle. Stupid comments or whispered words of passion. Kaiba hated the idea of loving a vegetable. Heaven was a lot better than this world, Jou belonged there he knew it more then ever. He was going there...wherever it is...

Would you know my name if I saw you in heaven

Would it be the same if I saw you in heaven

Remember.

I must be strong and carry on

'Cause I know I don't belong here in heaven

The song ended, within moments he cracked an eye open. He brought the hand up to gently wipe at the tears and pull it back staring at the tears. "Please don't cry." Jou whispered, eyes widened and the line on the monitor fluctuated irregularly a few times. Panic, "No!" Kaiba yelled, stepping forward to kneel beside the bed. "Shh..it's alright." Turning his head he gave a tender smile and caressed the side of his lover's face. "Don't you cry..my dragon." He choked on a sob his head burying into the cold hand. Lower lip quivering as tears spilled down his cheeks. "God is taking back his angel..."

Jounouchi looked at him, eyes glimmering. "I thought you didn't believe in Heaven." The fingers clenched rubbing the cheek beneath his fingertips. "No...your far to good and beautiful to just rot. I believe." He shook his head as the heart monitor twitched again, much more violently this time. "You're going there." There were no real words that could pass between them, "You think so?" A pause between them both, once more Kaiba sealed away the feel of his hand pressed against him. "Hai." Choking this out, he raised his head brown strands of hair hanging in his face. "Thanks."

No fear, for the first time he knew it. Jou wasn't afraid, he didn't know how he managed to stay so calm. The machines next to him began to light up, beeping and chirping at one another. Machine language something he was so familiar with. Turning his attention back to his puppy, vision becoming blurry, those amber orbs watching him still retaining that strange twinkle. They seemed to glimmer with a light he had never seen before. Just for a moment before they slipped shut.

"I love you Kaiba-kun...my dragon."

"Katsuya-kun, I love you with all that I am."

The staff rushed into the room, forcing him aside and yanking their hands apart. He watched them, tears staining his face running down his neck. Yuugi, Anzu, and Honda came rushing in from the corridor, and the room was swept up into a flurry of wild motion. Honda saw his face and forcefully shoved his way through the crowd to get to me. Silently he regarded the man before him, mouth opening and closing in an effort to say something. "He's gone to a better place. One I hope to see someday." Pushing past him, Kaiba left the room just as silently as he entered.

wails Man, that was hard to write. It had to be done though. I want something depressing that isn't totally gory and bloody. This fits in that category.

R&R please?