Anyway, I can't apologize enough for not updating. This chapter was extremely hard for me to work out, but I've done my best and I hope you like it. I'm sorry that its rather depressing and that it doesn't end well. I know many of you are extremely displeased with me because of that, but I wrote this story for a reason and I intend to follow through with it. To tell you the truth, I was inspired to do this when I lost my horse. I was feeling so horrible that I can't even begin to explain it. It was like I'd lost my best friend. Those of you who talk to me over AIM know how depressed I was and how it affected me. That was why I started this fic; to help me vent some of my feelings. Anyways, I hope you like it despite its lack of a happy ending. I really hope that like me, you'll find that not every story can end happily, but that its still okay in the end...
Disclaimer: none of its mine, none of it...
(Numair's POV 2 days later after the Tortallans win over the Scanran fort she is imprisoned in)
Numair was fear driven as he raced blindly through the many winding tunnels of the now captured Scanran fort. The blood rushing through his veins pounded with thunderous strength in his mind. His heart raced furiously within his chest, bound tightly by the thick ropes of pain. It was like a horrible stinging sensation, flowing rapidly over every inch of his body, scarring him both emotionally and physically. It was the same pain he had felt since the very moment he first learned of his lover's imprisonment. Now though, it had been magnified many times to that point that it was hardly bearable. It was only his love for Daine and his determination to find her that kept him on his feet now. It was his lack of knowing her state and if she was even alive and what pains she might still be facing that allowed him to press on. He had to find her.
He was completely alone now, as he searched madly for his love. None had dared to follow him after the battle had ended, for none wanted to witness the mage's good nature fade upon seeing his lover's condition. They all had known for certain that Daine would be in a terrible state both physically and emotionally; only Numair had not known it for fact. He would not have allowed himself to jump to such a conclusion, not yet.
It was as if he ran without sight now, for he was guided not by his eyes, but by his heart. There was an invisible force that pulled him in the direction he went, and that same force rushed him to a hasty stop when he was about to pass a large iron door. It was by far the largest door he had passed yet, and the only one to be made of a substance aside from thick oak wood. Breathing hard, for he had sprinted the entire distance during his search, he knew that behind this door, he would find Daine.
Without hesitating for another moment, Numair reached out and roughly threw the door open, ignoring its massive weight and strain on his arm; he did not care. All that he could think of now was reaching his love and freeing her from this nightmare of a place.
"Daine!" He began to call, picking up his pace to a jog, breathing heavily for his workload this day had been great. A shiver ran down Numair's spine suddenly as he entered this new room, for he felt the temperature drop significantly. It was cold and damp and there was an unavoidable stench of blood and death. It did not take Numair long to realize where he was standing now, and the realization hit him as if he had suddenly been trampled by a dozen horses at once. He gasped, understanding now that he stood in the entry way of a chamber of torture. Numair's eyes widened in untamed horror, his mouth drooping open in a gasp as his eyes closely scanned the walls of the room. They were adorned with countless objects that were meant but for one purpose: pain.
His eyes traveled across the cold stone walls, falling upon many instruments of torture that he recognized both from experience on the receiving end and from books he had read. He swallowed hard when he saw what he knew to be a cat's paw. It was a rake-like object made of iron that was extended on a long oak wood pole. Beside where it was propped against the wall were shackles meant to bind and suspend a grown man from the wall so that the instrument could be applied. It was meant to be raked against the back of the victim, tearing away mercilessly at their flesh, as the paw of a cat does to its prey.
Once again, Numair's heart began to race with new found panic. He had to find Daine; he had to find her now. What if she had been in this room? What if those savages had used these devices on her? These questions and countless others raced through Numair's mind with a vengeance. "Daine!" He began to call out as he had before, but this time with a much more panic stricken tone. He allowed his eyes to search the room, praying that he would find her in this large amount of space. "Daine!" Again, his call was met by nothing but an eerie silence, further terrifying him. He began to move forward towards an open trap door positioned in the center of the room. Reaching it, Numair began to jog down the stairs without hesitation. The walls were lined with a series of torches held up by wooden brackets, providing light for the chamber bellow.
It was not until Numair had reached the bottom of the small flight of stairs that his eyes fell on a site that would haunt him until he would breathe his last many years later. "No….." He breathed, eyes widening with unmatched horror. "Daine!"
Mind a whirl of emotions, fear eminent, Numair rushed forward to her. Every step he took felt as though he were walking a mile at a time. She lay only a short distance from the base of the stone stairway, crumpled on the floor, her face to the wall. He dove onto his knees in a great hurry beside her, all the while cursing to every god he could name under his breath. "Daine…" He called her name in little more than a whisper, though he knew that she could hear him. For the first time since he had set eyes on her this day, she stirred ever so slightly, as if in great pain. It was then that Numair noticed for the first time just what a state she was in. It was beyond anything he could ever have imagined finding. She donned not a stitch of clothing as she shivered ever so slightly in the deathly cold air of the chamber.
Without hesitating a moment, Numair pushed his way closer to her, all the while struggling to get out of his warm cloak. As soon as he was free from its confines, the chill air of the room seeped through his thin white shirt with a vengeance, making him shiver suddenly. He gently eased his arms around her deathly cold, pale skin and drew her closer to himself. He then wrapped the cloak firmly around her shoulders, all the while rubbing his calloused hands over her body to help warm her further. Beneath his touch, she began flinching violently. Her eyes shot open in fear, and Numair knew that she did not know who it was that held her. "Hush now, sweet," he crooned softly, still stroking her arms, "Its only me…." It pained him deeply that she had not known who he was straight off.
"Numair?" came a soft, rugged question. It was not the soft, sweet voice that he had grown to love. It was as if her voice revealed that she had been far too abused to ever love again. He could tell from her fearful and forced tone that it pained her to speak.
"Yes, sweet," He replied softly, drawing her closer to his chest and peering down so that she could see him clearly. "I'm hear now; you're safe…." Immediately, at this assurance from him, her flinching ceased and she came to a still. Now, she only trembled lightly from the horrible pain that came to her with every breath that she took. It was in this stretch of silence that Numair really began to examine her. He could see clearly now what he had not noticed before this moment, and it sent him into a new string of fear. Bruises of deep blues and purples covered her entire body, some turning a tinge of yellow with infection. Upon closer examination, he could see that hideously deep gashes covered her entire back. His mind flashed back to the torture chamber he had previously been in, and he realized now that she must have been exposed to the cat's paw.
Anger began welling up inside of him as he continued to search her body for further wounds. Whoever had done this could not be human, but monster. He wanted to find that man and strip the very flesh from his body. Numair could see now just how serious a state she was in, and with a horrible realization admitted unwillingly to himself that she could never survive. Very few victims exposed to the cat's paw ever lived to see the next light, and it was obvious that the wounds were not fresh. Though he knew all of this to be the terrible truth, he would will himself not to believe it. She could not die. She had to live out a long life with him. She could not leave him alone.
Without warning, tears began pouring steadily down Numair's face as he continued to gaze down at his fated lover. He shook violently with both disgust and fear as he felt her body trembling within his hold. She shivered with force, obviously having been fully exposed to the cold for far too long. Anger welled up inside him as his eyes fell upon the dried blood that was caked all over his lover's body, and the traces of vomit. It was a wonder that she was even still breathing, though he knew that in the state she was in, she could not last much longer; perhaps no more than a few days. For the time that she had left, Numair knew that it would be filled with nothing but torture for the both of them. It would be nothing but suffering for her, for it was obvious that she was in great pain even now.
'Cause I'm broken when I'm openAnd I don't feel like I am strong enough
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away
"Love you…." Daine murmured, voice muffled by the folds of her lover's shirt. The sound of her shaking voice startled Numair out of his troubled thoughts. He turned his attention back to her, taking in her words with a painful tug of his heart. She spoke as if she were fated, as if she understood that she was to die.
Numair held her unbearably close within the circle of her arms, trying his best to not be disheartened by her trembling and shivering. Gods, he wished that her pain could be gone now, for then her leaving him would be that much easier. If anything, he could not bear to see her in such tremendous agony. "Don't speak as though you won't see tomorrow's light…"Numair replied raggedly, as if begging her to listen. He knew though, that she wouldn't. She was of too stubborn a nature, even now as she lay dying.
Deep inside, Numair longed to make her see, to make her understand that she would survive. But it was nothing more than a lie, and he knew it. Feeling helpless and cursed, Numair bent his head down, gently capturing his lover's lips. They were icy and chapped, the skin peeling beneath his touch. Faintly, though she gave it her all, he could feel her begin to respond. Her nails, jagged and broken dug deep into his arms, drawing tiny rivers of blood as she clung to him with all that she had. In this moment, they both shared the same longing to melt into one another, to share the other's pain and take it upon themselves, stealing it away. There was no spell, no simple nor intricate magic that could bind them in this way. What had become of them was to stay.
Trembling, Numair pulled away from Daine, drawing in ragged breaths of air before returning to her. Again she accepted him, her lips trembling with fatigue. She could scarcely manage to hold up her head, he could tell.
"Numair…" came the hushed voice of Daine, ragged from confinement. He could feel her begin to shift her weight ever so lightly beneath him as she tilted her chin up to make eye contact with him. The vulnerable, broken emotion that shone clearly in her dull, glazed blue gray orbs sent a series of chills down his spine.
"I'm here sweet," He cooed softly, knowing just by the abused look in her eyes that what she had to say to him now, he would not like. He prepared himself for further shock, though he was certain that he could stand no more surprises; not today. Knowing that he was on the verge of losing the one he woke up for everyday had been far too much as it was. He began to entangle his spare hand in her mass of smoky brown curls, intimately stroking them with tender fingers.
"Please….don't leave me…"She pleaded with him, her voice desperate and lost. Her eyes glimmered with utmost betrayal. Though he knew that she had not intended that look to be for him, he could not help but feel shattered inside as a result of it.
"I won't leave you, Daine….," he soothed, stroking her hair more vigorously. He could not help but clench his other hand into a balled fist. If only he could find the one responsible for all that had happened to Daine. "Not ever…" he added as an after thought. He wanted desperately to console her, though he knew that his chances were slim. Gods he loved her; how he would miss her; how he would mourn her.
Before Numair could comprehend what was happening, tears suddenly began pouring like rain down her cheeks. Her gaze burned into him, her eyes filled with utmost terror and pain. She was soon lost in a fit of wracked sobs and choked breathing. He drew her close on impulse, pressing her to his chest with one hand, while the other rubbed her back soothingly in hopes to dim her pain. Even as he held her within the safe confines of his arms, it felt to him as if it were she holding and comforting him. "Shhh," he crooned, intent on settling her down. The more that she fought with herself, the harder this all would be. "Hush now, sweetling." He continued to stroke her back, his love for her radiating off of his hands. Her neck was curled within the tuck of his neck, her tears pouring against his tanned Tyran skin and drizzling down his neck to mix with tears of his own.
Finally, she found the strength to relay a message to him, though he could tell that it cost her greatly to do so. It was a sign that she could hold on only so long, for she was broken beyond repair. "They raped me, Numair…" her voice was little more than a hushed whisper, but he heard every last word as it vibrated against his neck as clearly as if she had shouted it directly into his ear. Every muscle in his body tensed with sudden rage and his heart stopped for a fraction of a second as her words began to sink in to their full intensity. She had been raped. Daine, the love of his life, had been violated in the worst of ways by her captors. Though in the back of his mind he had known this to be an inevitable possibility, for she was a female prisoner, it still left him dumbfounded and enraged that it had actually happened. Out of respect for her, they had not consummated their relationship for they had wanted to wait until they decided for certain to wed.
"Mithros…" Numair mumbled incoherently, unable to speak correctly for the amount of anger he now harbored. His eyes burned with hot tears that threatened to be released. He would not let them fall, not now, not in front of her. He had to be strong for her.
Finding it hard to control his anger, Numair clenched both of his hands into balled fists, digging the tips of his finger nails deep into his palms. Distantly, he could feel a cool, gel-like substance dripping slowly down his wrists for he had dug his nails deep enough to draw blood. He did not immediately release pressure, for his mind had drifted to faraway places that he could not feel his own pain; it was too great. A dull roar began to sound within his mind, building up in intensity until it soon became clear. It was the terrified cries and wailing of a familiar young woman. With every cry, she called his name, as if begging him to come to her and save her. But he had come too late for her, and she would be lost. The cries were that of his love and they would soon be his own voice as he cried in mourning for Daine. She could not save him now, just as he could no longer save her. They were lost to each other and they both regretfully knew it.
Numair snapped out of his thoughts as he felt trembling fingers brush his cheek ever so lightly. He looked down to see that Daine had extended her arm feebly up to his face, reaching out to touch him. Shivers of utmost pleasure ran down his spine as he felt the tips of her once silky smooth fingers graze his skin as tenderly as she could muster. Looking down now, Numair met her gaze not for the first time only to find her blue gray eyes once full of playful mischief now clouded with troubled thoughts and immense physical pain and woe. Her eyes were a window to her soul, and in them he could see that her spirit, once as rampant as the wild animals she so loved, now broken.
Delicately and with utmost care, Numair brought his hand up from where it rest in her mass of curls, sliding it slowly up her arm. He eased his hand over her smaller one that rest on his face, cupping it gently and stroking each of her fingers with his thumb. He drew in breath slowly as if trying to slow down time and to keep it from slipping from his hands. He savored the time that he had left with her as he knew that it was not much. Though her sobbing of moments before had ceased to only an intense trembling throughout her body, her distressed and troubled state was still obvious.
"Kiss me…."Again Numair was drawn from his thoughts by Daine, though this time be her shaking voice. He met her eyes, watching as her long, thick lashed beat against her cheek with interest. Her request was made from a fated heart, and so he granted it knowing that he wanted to as much as she wanted him to. He brought his head down to hers, drawing her into a deep kiss. He eased his lips over hers with care, not wanting to cause her further pain. She whimpered quietly into the kiss as the parted briefly for air, for her lips had been bruised many times by the abuse of her cruel captors.
When they parted again, they did not return to each other, but instead a long silence loomed over them. Neither would meet the other's eyes, both too afraid of what they would find there. Finally, the silence was broken as the sound of Daine's ragged, broken voice split the air, "Numair?" she called, as if in question to him. There was an odd tone to her voice, one that Numair could not remember having ever detected there before. It was as if something within her mind had changed, as if a transfer had been made and she had decided something she had previously been unsure of.
"I'm here," he replied firmly, holding her tightly. Though she had not been looking at him before, he could feel her eyes burning into him now until he was compelled to look down at her. Their eyes met for the hundredth time since he had found her, but this time her eyes told a different story, yet one that held similarities as well. Before, when her eyes had shown him a broken, confused young woman, now he saw that that broken young woman was no long so confused. Daine had come to some sort of conclusion he knew, for all he need know to make such a conclusion was written in her tortured blue gray orbs.
"Do…you love me?" Her voice shook as she said this, almost as if she dreaded his answer. Could she truly believe anything aside from him loving her? He hated beyond all things to think that now of all times she would doubt his love for her. If she doubted their love and his feelings for her now, how could he even begin to bear parting with her on such conditions?
"Gods, Daine you know that I do…." he replied, slightly frustrated and feeling guilty for allowing such an emotion to seep into his being. "I'll always love you, sweet; in this life and the next…forever…"he added, as if assuring her of his true feelings of love for her. He began stroking her cheek ever so lightly with the tips of his fingers, further showing her.
"Would…would you do anything for me?" Her voice was strained as she spoke. Numair knew that the simple act of speech was becoming more difficult for her as she was growing weaker and her pain grew greater.
This last question puzzled Numair greatly, for she had never asked him anything of the sort before. Before now, she had never needed to know if he would do anything for her and it tore at his heart. Voice choked from emotion so that he could scarcely speak, Numair finally struggled out, "I would do anything for you, be anything for you….whatever you wanted…I want you to know that…" This was perhaps the most serious, heart felt thing he had ever said to her and it pained him to do so. He stifled back as sob as he spoke these words, mind in a whirl of emotion. He just wanted to wake up and find that all of this had been some sort of a twisted nightmare; no more than a vividly painful dream.
Numair watched as his lover's already tormented eyes began to well up with tears once more as she choked back sobs. It was obvious to him now, even through his frantic state of mind that there was something she wanted to ask of him; something of utmost importance. The words that were soon to play on her lips were ones that he could never have dreamed of. She would make a request that he dared not ever imagine, nor even dread.
"Then please….Numair…."she stumbled with her words, voice hoarse and distraught all the while fighting back tears with what little strength she still possessed, "…steal my pain…."
The worst is over now and we can breathe againI wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
Momentarily stunned by her words, Numair found himself shocked into silence. He was unsure what to make of her request, for he did not entirely understand its meaning. There was a strange intensity in her voice as she had spoke, and it sent shivers down Numair's spine. "You know that I'd give anything now if I thought you could be free from this…."Numair tried to harness his thoughts and mold them into words, but he found it to be a difficult task. He was still unsure how to respond to her last statement. He hoped that he had said what she wanted, though he knew by her tone that there was something more that he as not understanding.
Numair's insides began to stir suddenly as she felt his lover's hand slide down his back and shakily make its way to his belt. Shivers of confusion went down his spine as he felt her inch her fingers along until they fell upon what she sought. She began tugging at the sheath of his small dagger that was pressed up against his hip, strapped to the belt around his waist. Understanding of what she wanted began seeping into his entire being, bringing him to a horrifying conclusion. She wanted him to take her life, to steal her last breath away! She wanted him, the man who woke up every day for her and breathed every breath for her sake alone to take her life away and end her pain. "Daine, you can't…..I can't….please…." He struggled to find the right words, anything to change her mind from where he knew she had taken it. He now feared her stubborn nature, for he knew that would be what would prevent her from seeing reason now.
His heart began thumping madly within his chest as he felt her trembling fingers begin fumbling with the buckle that held the dagger safely in place. Quick as lightning, but with the gentleness of a lamb, He eased he hands over her own that sought his dagger, pulling it away just as she had freed the weapon from its confines. Despite his care, the dagger slipped silently from her fingers, falling to the floor with a clatter of noise. Daine immediately flinched at the sound, her trembling increasing once more. Numair held her tightly to his chest, allowing her no movement for fear she would ask him again what she had before. "Numair-" she began, only to be cut off by the sharp tone of his voice.
"Hush sweet," Numair cooed, voice edged with a sudden sharpness. He tightened his grip on her hands, praying that she would not struggle with him now, or insist on what she wanted from him; he could never do it.
Against his hope, she began to struggling to free herself from his confines, though he would not budge in the slightest. She began to whimper with frustration; wanting only for him to free her from the terrible pain she felt now. "Please, Numair…..I….c-can't stand this any longer…." she pleaded with him, begged him to come through with her wishes.
Panic coursed rampantly through Numair's veins now. He had told her that he would do anything for her, and now he refused her the one thing that he could grant her in her last hours. He knew she could never survive this, and he wanted her to feel no more pain, but how could he go through with what she asked of him? Could she not see that he too suffered? Looking down at her, Numair watched as she jerked her head away from him with what little strength she possessed; she refused to meet his eyes this time. Gently so as not to hurt her, Numair brought is hand to her face, tilting her chin so that he could gaze into her eyes. Now, teamed with the pain and brokeness, her blue gray orbs revealed a strong sense of betrayal. Numair's heart shattered at what he saw. It had been his own doing that put the betrayal in her eyes. Gods how he wanted to make that look vanish, to do as she wished, but he did not think he was strong enough.
'Cause I'm broken when I'm openAnd I don't feel like I am strong enough
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away
Finally, Numair knew what he had to do. This was a purpose the gods had made him for. Not only was he to love her and treasure her for the time they had, he was to put an end to her pain when the time came. That time was now. He knew that though the task would be difficult for him, it was what he ought to do. For his Daine, the love of his life, he would do anything; he had told her that he would. He would not shy away now when she needed him the most. He would not let her stay in this world of endless pain. He would put an end to her suffering now.
"Daine, are you certain this is what you want?" He asked her, voice serious. It was hard for him to keep his voice soft when inside his mind was in a whirl of emotion and his heart in a storm of suffering.
Struggling slightly, she lifted her head up from where it was buried in the confines of his shirt and tilted it up to look at him. Their eyes met, both welling up with tears. In her eyes now, he could see the tiniest shred of hope, as if a tiny spark of the fire that had always been there, reserved only for him, was there once more. It made the reality of what he was about to do so much more painful. She did not need to give him a vocal response to his question; the look in her eyes told him everything that he needed to know. This was the last thing that he could do for her now, and she direly wanted him to do it.
Blindly, for he did not wish to tear his eyes away from her own, Numair reached down to the floor at his side and fumbled for the dagger that had dropped there only minutes before. He found it almost instantly and lifted it by its hilt. Bringing the weapon up to eye level, Numair eyed it with foreboding as it glimmered menacingly in the flickering torchlight. It was small for a dagger, but effective none the less. Its handle was made of finely carved ivory, a delicacy of the copper isles. The short curved blade was concocted of the finest steel, made never to rust or wear. Briefly, Numair found himself distracted with memories of the day he had received this dagger. It had been a gift from his Daine for Midwinter just over four years previous. She had scolded him not long before that for only caring a tiny, well rusted and worn pocket knife with him into battle. She had asked him what he would do if he were to find himself drained of his gift while still in the midst of danger. That same midwinter, she had given him the dagger, telling him that he ought to have a decent weapon aside from his gift; just in case. In a way, he wished now that he did not carry such a weapon, for then she could not ask this task of him.
Briefly, Numair bent down, kissing her forehead lovingly, lightly toying with a piece of her hair with his spare hand. Stroking her cheek with trembling fingers, he gazed down into her blue gray eyes, wanting to burn them into his memory forever. He wanted to remember everything about her, the way she smiled, the feel of her lips on his, the feel of her fingers as the brushed his skin; everything. "I love you…" he whispered, hollowly, brokenly. After this day, beyond this moment, he would never be the same man. He would be empty, having nothing that could bring him joy and fill his being again. He would have to live with the thoughts and dreams of what might have been; what should have been. He would live on, knowing that he and Daine had never started a family nor even married. He would never be a husband and would never have a wife. Until the end of his days, he would live in utter misery, haunted by broken dreams and what should have been.
"I…love you…too…" Daine choked out, voice amazingly calm for the situation she was in. Numair was unsure if he could remain so calm and collected as he stared death in the face. Now though, he was not entirely sure that he did not want to die.
Closing his eyes tightly shut, unable to face her any longer, Numair lifted up the dagger, poising it to strike. In his mind, he tried not to think of what he was doing, for then he might be unable to follow through with it. To end such a beautiful life this way; it seemed such a tragic way to end things. Just as he was about to bring the dagger down, bringing her life to a close, the sound of her trembling voice shook the air around him, freezing him completely in his motions. His eyes snapped open immediately only to be met by her blue gray orbs. There were tears in her eyes; tears of suffering and pain, but also tears of longing and pity for him. Despite all she had faced and all that pained her now, she still felt deeply for him; she still had room for love.
"No…." she voiced, bringing her hand up to his face to cup his cheek; an action he himself had used to comfort her countless times. Her voiced cracked and shook in that single word, but it was firm and strong was the crashing waves of the ocean.
Numair looked to her in question, eyes welling up with still unshed tears. Though he was to be the one stealing her pain, he still had a great deal of his own. It was as if she intended to do the same for him. It amazed him that even as she faced death, she had room to think of him, to worry for him and even love him still.
Against his will, tears of utmost frustration and brokeness fell down his face, rolling down his cheeks. He had wanted to be strong for her, but here he was direly needing her to rescue him when it ought to be him saving her. He felt further pain and longing as he felt her calloused finger tips smoothly stroke his face. She no longer trembled as she ran her hands over his cheeks, nose, forehead and eyes. Though he could not understand a word she said, he could hear her whispering assuring, comforting words to him. He felt her brush his tears away with steady fingers. Neither of them spoke aside from tiny whispers of assurance, but few words were needed this time. It was their actions that spoke for them, ringing so much louder than words.
Again Numair reached for the dagger, steadying himself to strike once more. Just as he clamped his eyes shut though, her voice split the air as he had before in quiet refusal. Did she not want him to do this after all?
"No…" she voiced in little more than a whisper. He heard as clearly as though a thousand trumpets blared in his ear, "Please, Numair…don't close your eyes……" When he looked at her in awestruck question, she continued, "I… want them…to be the last..thing I see…."
His heart warmed at her request, loving that she felt that way still, but dying because he knew that he could not bear to gaze into her eyes as he took her life. For her though, he would do it; he had to, for it was all that he could do for her now. Heart beating rapidly, Numair nodded, looking down to gaze deeply into her blue gray eyes as he once more poised to strike. This time, he both feared and understood that she would not interrupt him again. This time, he would actually follow through with the deed, and things would be all over. After this moment, he would never see her alive again, nor would he see her take another precious breath of air.
Taking a deep breath, Numair prepared both physically and emotionally to strike. "I love you, magelet…" he spoke gently, using his pet name for her that he had concocted long ago when they had first met. He knew that that name that he reserved only for her meant more to her than he could ever understand, and so he spoke it to her now in her last moments. "I'll never love another…"
Without speaking another word, Numair breathed deeply, bringing down the dagger that was once poised over his head down to meet her chest, piercing her heart and shattering his own at the same time. All the while he executed this action, he held her eyes with his own, his heart captured by the way she gazed up at him. If his eyes and his ears did not deceive him, then just before the blow landed, she spoke a quiet good-bye to him and forced her lips to curve into a tiny smile just for him. He heard her emit a tiny gasp of pain as the dagger pierced her skin, tears streaming down her already tear stained face. Her pain lasted no longer than a few brief moments though, for in that time her chest fought to heave up and down for air, but it soon stopped. Now she lay still and unmoving, her chest quiet. Her eyes remained open, gazing hollowly back at him. Veralidaine Sarrasri was dead.
By now, Numair was breathing more heavily than ever. He immediately felt a strong sense of being completely alone in the chamber. It began swallowing him alive, for his mind went into a frenzy of emotion. In the back of his mind, he thought he could hear someone screaming. It took him several moments to realize that the screams of agony were his own. Without bothering to be gentle any longer, Numair threw himself onto the now lifeless body of his love, drawing her roughly to his chest. He received no response from her. She only lay still and unmoving in his arms, growing colder with every moment.
For a long while, Numair just lay with her in his arms, crying his heart out and cursing the gods for bringing this fate upon him and his lover. He wanted nothing more than to be struck down by Mithros himself in that very moment so that he may then join his lover forever.
After a while, Numair finally managed to pull himself together. He had no notion how long it had been since he first stumbled upon this chamber. His head ached terribly, slowing his every move. Drying his eyes on the sleeve of his blood stained white cotton shirt, Numair pulled his tunic more tightly around Daine's naked body. He gazed down upon her still form, finding himself unable to tear is eyes away from her hollow expression and her still blue gray eyes. As if in a daze, he reached down and adoringly pushed her eye lids, first one and then the other over her forever emotionless blue gray eyes, covering them. He bent down and eased his lips over her now icy cold lips, trying to bring them warmth once again but to no avail. It was hard for him to understand that she was gone forever.
Pulling his tunic more tightly around her still form, he lifted her body up into his arms with care as he stood to his feet. Hesitating only for a moment, he then carried her up the stone steps and out of the chamber. He would find Alanna and the others and break the news to them. They would return to Corus where she could have a proper resting place. Perhaps then he could find the savages that had brought this terrible fate upon himself and his lover.
I wanted you to knowI love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph and I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
'Cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away
A/N: Well? What did you guys think? I know, its very sad...passes around tissue box If you want, I'll do maybe one or 2 more chapters to this fic....they would include Numair finding the man who raped Daine and also going back to the first chapter when Numair is an old man reflecting back on what happened....so please, let me know if you forgive me and if you want me to do that! Also, I've picked up Wolfish Desires again, so that should be up and running shortly...Gallan Return will be picked up again as soon as Wolfish Desires is done! I promise! REVIEW!!!!