Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-gi-oh, which is probably a relief, being the horror-loving villain fangirl that I am. This is my interpretation of the events that separated Jounouchi and Shizuka when they were children, and of the emotions that she keeps bottled up inside and hidden behind her angelic smile.
The sound of glass shattering awoke me with a start, my heart beating in my chest hard enough to burst. Sweat slicked my pale skin, causing my nightclothes to cling uncomfortably.
I could hear shouting from downstairs.
I pushed myself into a sitting position and stared at my half-closed door, my eyes wide. I couldn't stop my hands from trembling, not even when I gripped my comforter hard enough to whiten my knuckles. My breath came in short gasps, and I flinched as I heard something large, or heavy, or both, strike a wall.
I knew what was going on.
Daddy had been drinking again.
I wasn't so young that I didn't understand, though big brother tried to shield me from it. Daddy had a drinking problem, and he sometimes got a little out of hand. I hadn't known where mama's bruises and black eyes had come from until I had walked in on them one late night, still rubbing sleep from my eyes.
Big brother didn't get me out of the room in time.
Later on, mama had hugged me and kissed me and rubbed foul-smelling cream on my bruises, promising me in hushed tones that everything would be all right. Big brother had stood to the side, watching us, and I knew from the look in his eyes that things would not be all right. Mama kept looking at the door, eyes frightened. Things would never be all right.
I let out a choked cry around the lump in my throat as the yelling increased in volume drastically. The strike was so loud I heard it as if it happened right in my room. I clutched the comforter tighter around my shaking form, never taking my gaze from the door, heedless of the tears spilling down my cheeks and staining my covers.
I was terrified of him visiting me as he sometimes did after these episodes, late at night when everyone else was asleep. Daddy threatened to kill me if I ever told anyone, his breath rich with the sour smell of alcohol.
I believed him.
I whimpered as my door creaked open slowly, unconsciously scooting back and pressing myself tightly against the headboard. I let out a sigh of relief when big brother's head poked in, his dark eyes settling on me with a tinge of fear. Something was wrong.
He practically flew to my bedside, clutching me close and stroking my hair as I sobbed against his chest, his strong presence comforting. He whispered empty reassurances into my ear that I knew better than to believe, but I wanted to, I wanted to believe so desperately. I trembled uncontrollably, shifting so I could stare at my open doorway, a weak light trailing in from the hall. I surrounded myself with that pale light, with his strong scent, with the feel of his arms. It was important somehow, though I didn't understand why.
The shouting, the crying, all sounds from downstairs had stopped.
The quiet was unnerving.
I opened my mouth to speak, but big brother laid his finger across my lips, cautioning me to silence. Without saying a word, he lifted me up and cradled me against him, his eyes trained on the doorway as well. His body was tense, radiating a sense of readiness, eyes alert.
I gave a violent start as a shadow appeared, but it was only mama, tears illuminating her dark eyes and reddening her cheeks and nose. I squirmed and big brother let me go.
"Mama!" I cried as I threw myself at her, clutching at her skirts and sobbing. "Mama, are you all right?"
"Ssh honey," she whispered, her eyes never leaving big brother. She tilted her head slightly, asking a silent question.
Big brother fidgeted, and then he nodded. His hands balled into tight fists at his sides.
"Come, little one," she murmured soothingly, slender fingers smoothing my hair. "We're leaving now."
"Leaving?" I sniffled and pulled away, looking up at her in surprise. I couldn't leave; I couldn't leave big brother alone with daddy. I opened my mouth but no words would come out, so I pleaded with her with my eyes.
She was still staring at big brother.
Ignoring my shrill protests, she firmly grasped my arm and pulled me away, through the doorway, down the hall, down the single flight of stairs. I fought her the entire way, staring back at big brother as if he had betrayed me. I took in his tired appearance, his disheveled blonde hair, his rumpled clothing. He ghosted us silently, appearing on the edge of sudden, violent movement.
"Where do you think you're going?" a voice thundered.
It was daddy, and he was pissed.
I couldn't help it; I started crying again. I knew what would happen, and I knew that there was nothing I could do to stop it.
Mama yanked me harder, pulling me in a mad dash towards the door. Daddy lunged to cut us off, but big brother was there, buying us the time we needed to escape.
He had a bat in his hand, though I didn't know where he had gotten it from.
His eyes flicked to me, the dark brown orbs tired but determined.
"Go!" he cried as mama and I fled, dashing out of the house and into the family car. Mama's hands were trembling as she put the key in the ignition.
I heard screaming from inside the house.
"Mama, mama, stop!" I screamed, beating my tiny fists against the window. "Mama, what about big brother!"
She was silent as she started the car and began to pull out of the driveway, though I noticed her hands were still shaking. It was then I saw the blood on her blouse, the way it clung to her side sickeningly. I sobbed harder and beat at the window until my own hands bled.
As we began to pull down the street, I stared back towards the house and imagined that I saw big brother standing in the doorway, watching us, shoulders bowed with fatigue. I could feel his presence, smell his scent, and see his beautiful smile.
It was the last time I saw him before the violent court battles, and then he was gone forever, torn away from me like my childhood innocence. As my sight steadily failed, I grew withdrawn and entirely dependent upon mama, as unfair was it was. I knew I should put forth the effort to stand on my own two feet, to offer up some strength for mama to lean upon after all we had been through.
However, all I could dwell upon was that I would never be able to see big brother again.