Epilogue:
C'est la Vie. These warm feelings are part of life...As long as I stay as who I am. That's life. I want to go on loving you," she whispered, tears running down her cheeks. She had done all that she could do.
Right in front of my eyes... Is the place where this very moment lives. These warm feelings are part of life...As long as I stay as who I am…
Tsukino Usagi uttered a small groan of annoyance and a hand reached out from under the duvet to swot at the alarm clock that was belting out the words to her favourite song, thus disturbing her sleep.
The tune was abruptly cut off and Usagi sat up, tears filling her eyes as she recalled yesterday's events.
They were gone. Ami-chan, Mako-chan, Rei-chan… Mamoru…
"Usagi-chan?" Looking up, Usagi saw Aino Minako sitting on a chair near the door. Artemis was on her lap and Luna at her feet. The female guardian ran to Usagi and the pigtailed girl gave her a tearful hug.
She didn't remember much of what had happened after she had overcome the Princess. Minako must have taken her home.
Then why do you wish to live in this world without the man you love? You should hate this life's cruelties as much as I…
Minako… she had lost just as much as Usagi and still she had remained strong. She had been there for her friend, even when Usagi had failed her.
"Minako-chan, I'm so sorry."
"Don't be" Minako stood up, still clutching Artemis, "You gave us a second chance. Never apologise for that."
"But…"
Minako cut her off by stepping up to the bedside and dropping the locket containing the Ginzuishou into her lap. "Its power has faded now. There is no more use for it in this world."
Usagi looked up, not understanding.
"Why don't you get up?" Minako prompted her, a small hint of a smile crossing her face as she spoke, "There are some people waiting for you downstairs."
"People?" Usagi repeated as Minako's smile grew wider. Her heart leaping inside her chest, Usagi threw off the duvet and jumped out of bed, forgetting that the clothes she was still wearing from yesterday were creased. She raced through the hallway and down the stairs, her heart now thumping wildly and yet more tears springing into her eyes when she saw them.
"Mako-chan, Ami-chan!"
Instead of racing to them, Usagi paused, uncertain as though her eyes were playing tricks on her somehow.
"How? How did this happen?" She asked softly as Minako came down behind her.
"The Ginzuishou, coupled by your will, brought them back" Minako explained quietly.
"So I really could control it?" Usagi whispered in wonder. "Mamoru said I could, that I just had to believe in myself… Mamoru…" she choked back a sob, thinking of her lost boyfriend. The Ginzuishou had worked a miracle and she could expect no more of it. She wasn't that strong.
"You just had to believe," Minako answered her quietly.
"And what about Rei-chan?" Usagi asked hesitantly. Instantly, when thinking of her absent friend, her image in her mind was Rei at the end, so hateful and inhuman.
"She's been reborn too" Makoto confirmed softy but Usagi detected the pain in her friend's voice and was instantly filled with worry and dread.
"Then why isn't she here?"
"She couldn't face you, either of you" Ami explained gently, "The guilt weighs too heavily upon her. She hates herself right now."
"Then we must go to her. We must tell her that it wasn't her fault, that we don't blame her," Usagi said immediately, her heart clenching at the thought of Rei being in pain.
"No" Minako shook her head, "You must stay here. All of you."
"What? Why? We're her friends."
"She won't see you." Minako answered quietly, "I'll speak to her."
"Minako." Artemis protested, "Perhaps Usagi is right. Perhaps Rei needs to see her Princess right now."
"Usagi-chan is not the Princess," Minako replied, a little sharply, "Not in this lifetime and she has suffered enough. I will speak to Rei."
Usagi lowered her head, knowing that this was probably best. After all, Usagi reminded herself, out of all of them, Rei had hurt Minako the most and it was Minako's forgiveness that she needed.
Recalling Minako's pain made Usagi want to say something but just as she opened her mouth, Ikuko appeared in the doorway.
"Usagi, you're awake," she smiled in relief. "I was worried about you."
Usagi lowered her head, feeling guilty, "I'm sorry."
Ikuko smiled, "As long as you're alright. Minako-san, thank you for bringing Usagi home last night."
Minako nodded in acknowledgement, feeling a little awkward, Usagi assumed.
"Now," Ikuko, happy that her daughter was fine, said brightly, "Who's staying for breakfast?"
Minako declined, eager, Usagi decided, to speak to Rei as soon as possible. Ami and Makoto, however, accepted Ikuko's offer and they had barely said goodbye to Minako before they were ushered into the small dining area.
"Ami-chan, Mako-chan" Usagi began softly as soon as Ikuko was out of earshot again, "I'm sorry. I let you down," tears built up in her eyes again and Usagi did nothing to rub them away.
"You don't need to apologise." Ami replied, getting up from her seat and coming round to Usagi's side, "Minako-chan had warned us. The Ginzuishou's power was strong as was your love for Mamoru. Combined together its power had you enthralled. There is nothing for you to be sorry for."
"But it hurt you and Rei-chan… all of this… because of me…"
"No." Makoto answered, "What happened to Rei... it had nothing to do with you. You couldn't have stopped it."
"But I could have helped her!"
"You did." Ami replied to this as she wrapped her arms tightly around her friend, "She has been reborn, too. She has been given a second chance as well."
Despite Ami's words, Usagi felt little comfort. She was overjoyed that her friends had been returned to her but at what price? After this, Usagi was sure, nothing would ever be the same again.
"Mamoru? Mamoru! Mamoru!"
He gasped, sitting up in his bed as the remnants of Usagi's screams reverberated loudly into his mind, piercing the veil of sleep that had been hanging over him.
Mamoru's throat felt dry and he coughed a few times as he struggled to get his bearings. He remembered the final battle between Sailor Moon and Metallia. He recalled vividly sacrificing his own life for the girl he loved. So why was he here? Why was he in his own room, in his own bed?
He had not acted with some blind faith that he would somehow be spared death. Mamoru knew what he was doing when he gave up his life so this was… it could only have been the Ginzuishou.
His head ached and, as Mamoru looked around the room, his vision slowly swam back into proper focus and he realised that he wasn't alone.
"Welcome back," the man leaning against the far wall commented dryly as Mamoru struggled to place him.
"Shin?" he shook his head, "Kunzite?" he amended, taking in the Tennou's human form with a mixture of relief and amazement. "How is this possible? You died?"
"So did you" Jadeite said in amusement as he got up from his chair to stand at Kunzite's side.
"All of you?" Mamoru asked as the door opened. Nephrite entered carrying a glass and a pitcher. He set them down on the cabinet and poured Mamoru a drink, which he readily accepted.
"The three of us." Kunzite confirmed, "As human. There are no guises or illusions now."
"The Ginzuishou." Nephrite added with a small smile, "I guess your Princess isn't that bad after all."
Usagi…
Nephrite and Jadeite exchanged sly glances, as though guessing Mamoru's line of thought. "Don't worry." Jadeite smiled, "We're going to Crown in a while. I'm sure she'll be there so we can give her the good news."
"I'll come with you." Mamoru went to stand up but he suddenly felt a weakness in his legs and he would have fallen had Jadeite and Nephrite not been there to catch him.
"You need to rest first, Master." Kunzite said, a little sternly, as he sat back down on the bed, "Jadeite and Nephrite will speak to the Princess on your behalf."
"And in any case," Jadeite put in, "Nephrite is hoping that Sailor Mercury will be there."
The taller man blushed and looked away. Mamoru chuckled weakly at this, which caused Nephrite to huff loudly.
Mamoru smiled. This was what he recalled most fondly from the past life; the banter and companionship between them. Perhaps now that they had been granted this second chance, things could remain this way.
After a few more minutes, Jadeite and Nephrite made their leave. Kunzite, however, remained, declaring that he wanted to make sure that Mamoru got the rest that he needed.
Still, despite this, Mamoru insisted on staying awake. There were, after all, things that they needed to discuss.
He noted how Jadeite and Nephrite seemed at ease in their new human forms. Nephrite, of course, had been in his before and it was now becoming second nature and Jadeite had always been able to easily adapt to new situations.
Kunzite seemed almost awkward as he approached the bed and he regarded Mamoru warily. He was also tense, as if expecting trouble at any given moment.
Amused, Mamoru shook his head slightly whilst trying to hide the small smile that he knew Kunzite would not appreciate. The former Tennou raised an eyebrow but said nothing, awaiting Mamoru it would seem.
"How long have I been out for?"
"Most of day, Master."
"How did you get here?"
"We woke downstairs. I don't remember how we got here."
"Are you… are you free?"
Kunzite nodded slowly, "Metallia is gone and the stones that enslaved us were shattered upon our deaths."
"So you are free." Mamoru sighed in relief.
"We are. We're free to serve our Master."
"No," Mamoru shook his head, "I don't want that. I don't want you to serve me in this lifetime."
Kunzite frowned; the expression on his face was difficult to read as he said, with some difficulty. "In our previous lives we made a grave error by not trusting your judgement. Please allow us to make amends by serving you once again."
"Metallia's touch is corruption. You saw a part of her enter me. I will not allow myself to be used again."
Mamoru shivered slightly as he recalled Kunzite's words. His guardian had been wrong. It was not Metallia's touch that was corruption. It was the past life's influence on all of them that repeatedly led them to their ends. The only way to stop the cycle would be to live in this world, in this lifetime, as though it was their first.
He said as much to Kunzite and then, somewhat apprehensively, awaited his guardian's reaction. Mamoru had expected protests, anger even but not the small smile of understanding and some gratitude.
"Thank you," he said with sincerity. "However, if the need ever arises we will be there to protect our Master again. You cannot change destiny with mere words."
Mamoru knew that this was all that Kunzite would allow, in his mind, they would always be his guardians.
"And what of Usagi?" he asked, knowing that they would have to venture into the subject of the Princess sooner or later.
"You have our blessing," Kunzite said without hesitation, but with some awkwardness.
"Thank you." Mamoru felt little contentment at this, although he had expected he would. He knew why. It was because of all the suffering that they had all endured to get this second chance. Although they had an opportunity to start afresh, there would be a lot to make amends for in the meantime. Everyone had been granted a new beginning but one.
Mamoru closed his eyes briefly, the pain of this knowledge cutting deep. He knew he should be thankful for what he had but he couldn't help the regret that welled up inside of him whenever he thought of his forth guardian and that, somehow, this was his fault. Had he been a stronger leader then this might not have happened.
"It wasn't your fault." Kunzite stated quietly, as though guessing Mamoru's regret, "Individually we choose our path. You cannot take on the consequences of another decision."
Mamoru smiled sadly, "I know, but it doesn't mean that we do not feel another's pain."
Kunzite nodded, appreciating Mamoru's words, "All of our decisions have consequences, and some decisions are made because of these consequences."
"What do you mean?" Mamoru frowned; Kunzite's cryptic responses still frustrated him, especially as he more, often than not, did not fully understand the meaning behind them.
"Zoisite's decision," Kunzite answered.
"He lives?"
"He does." Kunzite confirmed, "But, unlike us, he has retained his Shitennou form."
"The past life? Must you always live in the past?"
"Mars--"
"Don't… just don't…"
The seeds of one's destiny are sown by no individual other than yourself.
The wise words of her mother suddenly came to the forefront of Rei's mind as she watched Minako slowly, yet determinedly, towards the shrine's gates. She had made her own choices and, even though she had never dreamt of the outcome, they had been hers to make and hers alone.
When Rei had awoken back in her home she had at first wished for death for, whenever she closed her eyes, all she could see were the terrible things that she had done. The terrible things that she had done. It would be so easy to blame Metallia for everything. Rei knew that Usagi-tachi would forgive her. Their friendship was as a wonderful thing in this life as it had been in the last and Rei felt sure that they would give her another chance. They would forgive her for the wicked things that had been done using her body, but Rei could not forgive herself. That was why she had remained at the shrine, refusing to see anyone who called. Solitude would become her punishment. Kami-sama knew that she deserved more.
Yet the evil that had been done in her name was not what cut so deeply into her soul. It was her actions of before that left Rei so desolate and so ashamed. She had betrayed her best friend and torn her lover from her side out of jealousy and hate. His heart had become as blackened as her own, however, he had not deserved it, not really. Zoisite had never truly been evil. He had been merely a pawn, as had all of the Shitennou. He had been a pawn and had paid the ultimate price. His death would not have been necessary had it not been for Rei.
"If you are using her then I will kill you."
"You love her, too?"
Her heart clenched as she recalled their heated words. Her friendship with Minako had become confused somehow and had ended up running a lot deeper than Rei wanted to admit. Now she was not sure if she were capable of such feelings. Her mind was hollow, as was her heart.
She watched in silence as Minako reached her, unsure of what to say, if anything at all. At that moment a crow cawed somewhere nearby causing both girls to jump. Rei could sense the pain between them, darkening their hearts, but even still she was startled to see the tears in Minako's eyes. Yet the idol was strong, even now.
"I'm glad you're safe," she said without wavering, breaking down the barriers that had been built between them.
Rei uttered a small sob but backed away, in case comfort was offered. It was not and she didn't know whether to be hurt more or less by this.
I'm sorry…
These words felt too insignificant and small to express the amount of remorse and regret that she was feeling. All that she had done… there was no going back from it, surely there was no going back now?
"Please go." She stated softly, turning away as she felt unable to look at Minako for her guilt and despair was so great. To remember, it was a terrible thing but Rei knew that Metallia would have had it no other way. Only after seeing through the eyes of the beast could Rei truly understand how such a hateful creature had been able to exist in this world. Metallia fed on hate and pain and inside Rei she had flourished. The things that she had done… they would not have been possible were it not for the blackness that had already marked Rei's heart. Metallia had not corrupted her, she knew, she had done this herself.
"Rei!" Minako's voice floated after her as Rei quickly made her way down the steps of the shrine. She couldn't talk to her… not now.
"Mars!" Minako cried out, anger edging into her voice as she spoke. "You can't just walk away from this. You can't walk away from what you've done."
With these words, Minako lunged forward and grabbed Rei's arm, forcing her to stop.
"I'm not walking away." Rei hissed as tears filled her eyes at Minako's touch.
"Yes. You are." Minako, unmoved, held her gaze as her grip on Rei's arm tightened.
"I remember it all. I remember what I did," Rei whispered bitterly, "Being here with you, with any of you, only serves to remind me."
"Why did you do it?"
Minako's question startled her and Rei found herself unable to reply. This was not because she did not know. She knew all too well how it had all started. Her hatred for Zoisite had started this and Metallia had fed on her hatred and despondency.
"You love her, too?"
Again Zoisite's words came to mind and Rei hung her head in shame as the realisation struck her. It had been her jealousy that had caused this; nothing more.
"I was jealous." She admitted quietly, "I was jealous of what you had with him."
Minako looked a little taken aback but quickly recovered herself to say, "You're my best friend, nothing more than that."
"I understand but how can you even look at me, let alone call me your best friend?"
"Because that's what you are. All that has happened… I forgive you and I know Usagi-tachi will, too."
"I don't want or deserve your forgiveness. Zoisite is dead because of me. You should hate me for that."
"It is hate that started all this!" Minako cried out as Rei pulled away from her. "Don't repeat the mistakes of the past. We've been given another chance."
At this, Rei's resolve crumbled and she uttered a small sob.
"Go to Crown." Minako urged her, "See Usagi-tachi."
"What about you?" Rei asked, her voice wavering.
Minako gave her a small smile, "I have something I need to do first."
Rei said nothing more as her best friend turned away and quickly hurried down the steps of the shrine. Despite the fact that Minako had held it together well, Rei could see that she was struggling with her own pain.
Go to Crown. See Usagi-tachi.
She'd be lying if she said that Minako's words hadn't affected her but to go to Crown so soon? Rei just wasn't sure if she could do it. Usagi might be able to forgive her but Rei didn't know if she could forgive herself.
I don't want or deserve your forgiveness. Zoisite is dead because of me. You should hate me for that.
It is hate that started all this! Don't repeat the mistakes of the past. We've been given another chance.
Minako barely managed to keep herself from breaking down as she left the shrine. Rei, she knew, would be fine now. After all, time would be a great healer and, now that they had the gift of a second chance, she knew Rei would want to be a part of that, to make amends. Even after all that had happened, Minako couldn't hate her. Even after Zoisite…
Minako closed her eyes, suddenly determined not to allow herself to break down. If she did, she knew that she would never stop and she didn't want that. She didn't want to mourn him because she didn't want to face up to the fact that he was no longer in her life.
Then Minako's expression brightened as she remembered something. She opened up her handbag and took out a small neatly wrapped package and handed it to Zoisite.
"In exchange" she explained when he shot her a confused glance, "For the music box. I believe I am still in your debt."
Zoisite chuckled softly, "It appears that we were thinking along the same lines" and he handed her a velvet jewellery box. "In exchange for the clothes."
Just when you think you know a person…Minako frowned, "I didn't see you get this?"
"I would have thought you of all people would learn to watch me more closely."
Minako giggled and opened the box. Inside was a small V shaped pendant on a silver chain. "I love it!" she couldn't help but throw her arms around him, nearly knocking him off of the bench.
"I'm glad"
Her hand subconsciously reached up and touched the pendant around her neck. She hadn't ever taken it off and now it was all that remained of what they had…
Lost in the darkness, hoping for a sign
Instead there is only silence
Can't you hear my screams?
"Stop it." Minako whispered softly to herself. She couldn't think of him, of what happened and how she hadn't been strong enough to save him.
Never stop hoping
Need to know where you are
But one thing is for sure
You're always in my heart
"Then this… this is our fate after all…" Minako knelt over him, her words coming out as no more than a dry whisper through cracked lips. There had been many things that she had wanted to say, so many things before it was too late but her words were now beyond his hearing. All she had been able to do was offer him the comfort of her presence at the end. Had it been a comfort to him? She hoped that he had been conscious enough to gain some peace. Minako had not wanted him to die with hatred in his heart.
"Minako-chan." Artemis whispered softly as tears blurred her eyes. At that moment Minako felt so lost. The pain she felt was so unbearable that she was unable to do anything but think of the past, and of her regrets.
I'll find you somewhere
I'll keep on trying until my dying day
I just need to know whatever has happened
The truth will free my soul
"I'm sorry." Minako uttered as the last of her resolve crumbled before her guardian cat's eyes. "I'm not that strong."
With those words she turned and fled into the trees, just wanting to be alone, but not before she heard Artemis's soft reply:
"No one is asking you to be."
"I will take away your pain. I will give you the chance to be the idol that you have always dreamed of being… for a price…"
"A price?"
"Your hatred."
"My hatred?"
"This kingdom, my Dark Kingdom, feeds off the hatred and pain of others. Your pain is greatly pleasing our Queen. This favour must be rewarded."
"What do I have to do?"
"She's coming round."
"Chizu-chan? Chizu-chan?"
She moaned, turning her head away from the soft voice that called her name. Endless visions flashed through her mind, echoes of a time and life that she so desperately wanted to forget. Curling her hands into fists, her moans became louder as her name was called again.
"Chizu-chan?"
Mio continued to hold Rei's gaze as the beast drew back a clawed hand.
"I can give only death to the most pitiful of my servants."
"No…" she cried out softly, tears spilling down her cheeks to soak her pillow as she twisted on the bed, trying in vain to escape the nightmares that plagued her.
She had to close her eyes as the final moment came. Mio uttered nothing but a strangled gasp as her breastbone cracked with the force of the blow administered to her. She fell back against the wall, agony exploding through every fibre of her being. Blood poured from her wound and with it came an overwhelming rush of vertigo and blackness. Mio's head slumped forward onto her chest, as though she were leaning forward to kiss the fatal wound. Her vision darkened but she did not fear the void that awaited her for all she felt was release and held onto a little faith that, one day, her soul would earn redemption, that there would be a rebirth for her in the end.
"Chizu-chan!" the voice beside her cried out, forcing her to open her eyes.
Gasping, she looked around, momentarily thrown as she struggled to get her bearings.
The young woman leaning over her smiled gently and leaned over to brush some stray hairs from her eyes.
"Welcome back. We were worried about you." She stated quietly.
"Aiko." Chizu whispered weakly, finally recognising her older sister.
"Yes, it's me." Aiko took her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "You've had us very worried, Chizu-chan."
"Us?"
"Yes. Mother and father are here, too. They've just gone to get your doctor. You scared us. We thought… we thought you'd never wake up."
"Wake up?" Chizu repeated weakly, "I don't understand."
"Don't you remember what happened?"
"I can give only death to the most pitiful of my servants."
"No…" Chizu whispered, clutching desperately at the sheet beneath her, "I don't want to remember."
"I came round to visit." Aiko ignored her pleas, "I felt bad for the way we had shunned you so I came to make amends. I found you unconscious, Chizu-chan. When the doctor told us… why didn't you tell us how ill you were? We could have helped you."
"You made your feelings perfectly clear." Chizu whispered, more tears escaping her as she slowly began to realise the truth.
"Chizu, we would have supported you in this!" Aiko cried, her pain obvious as she continued. "Your tumour would have killed you had the surgeons not operated as soon as you were brought in. As it was, you were left in a coma and have been for the past six months."
Then it was just a dream?
Chizu felt overwhelming relief as this knowledge and yet more tears welled up in her eyes. It had felt so real…
"I want to see our parents." Chizu asked softly as she struggled to put the terrifying dreams behind her, although there was still something about them that shook her to the core.
A second chance…
"They're on their way." Aiko assured her before adding, a little hesitantly. "You had another visitor earlier."
"Who?" Chizu frowned at Aiko's reluctance.
"Aino Minako."
"Aino Minako? The Aino Minako?" Chizu repeated, feeling numb with shock. Aino Minako had failed to note her very existence. All Chizu had wanted was for Minako to notice her and, when she finally had done, Chizu had not been conscious to realise it.
"She asked me to give you a message. She said that she hopes that you get better soon and when you do perhaps you could give her manager a call. She left his card with me."
"Why? I don't understand?"
Aiko smiled and took hold of her sister's hand; "She wants to record a duet with you when you are well enough."
"With me? Why?"
"Because you're a talented singer of course!" Aiko admonished her. "I've listened to some of your demo tapes and they're very good and I feel so bad for misjudging you."
"You don't have to--"
"I know, but I want to. We'll talk about it some more later. We just want you to make a full recovery and Minako-san does, too."
"The operation… it was a success?"
Aiko nodded and again Chizu felt her tears starting to fall. Without hesitation, her sister pulled her into an embrace. Chizu choked back a sob as she pressed her face into Aiko's shoulder.
Her vision darkened but she did not fear the void that awaited her for all she felt was release and held onto a little faith that, one day, her soul would earn redemption, that there would be a rebirth for her in the end.
Whether it had been a dream, or a darkened path that she had once walked down, Chizu was safe in the knowledge that she had been granted her second chance and she would be forever grateful for it.
I forgive you…
An echo of something older whispered in the back of her mind and Chizu smiled through her tears. At last she had found peace in herself and was looking forward to a future that she had before only dreamed of.
Ami sat in Crown, different emotions overwhelming her as Usagi sobbed in Makoto's arms. These were tears of joy, tears of relief that Mamoru lived. Nephrite, sensing her conflict, gently squeezed her hand in reassurance.
The relief that, after everything, it was all over was strong in Ami but so was the pain that had touched all of her friends. They had, in a sense, all felt the agony of loss. Ami had almost not believed it when Nephrite had entered Crown. But her happiness had been short-lived.
Jadeite was sitting apart from them, almost awkwardly, it would seem. Nephrite sat with Ami and the other side of her were Usagi and Makoto. Two of their friends were missing. Ami couldn't even begin to imagine the pain that they must be feeling. Although Minako had said that she would be the one to speak to Rei, Ami was not at all sure if this was the right thing for their leader to be doing right now. Minako had lost more than any of them.
Ami couldn't claim to know Minako as well as the others but she understood a little of how she must be feeling for Ami had almost lost the person that she loved, too. She had felt, as Minako had, that she had betrayed her friends by developing feelings for Nephrite but her friends had come through for her and Ami knew that they would have done for Minako and Zoisite, after all Zoisite had saved Usagi's life. Of course now it was too late and Ami wondered if anything would ever be the same again. They had won the war against the Dark Kingdom but at what price?
Sighing, Ami just didn't know what to do for the best. She knew that someone had to approach Minako but she didn't know who would be the best person. Perhaps it would be better if Mamoru spoke to her? He was more detached and, after all, Zoisite had been one of his guardians. It may be better coming from him.
"What will you do now?" Ami finally broke the silence, unable to bear it any longer it would seem.
"I don't know." Nephrite shrugged. "Motoki says that my job is still available if I want it and Mamoru-sama has offered to put us up until we can get ourselves sorted out."
Nephrite had told Ami how Mamoru had freed them from their oaths to him but he doubted that Kunzite would leave. Despite his and Mamoru's differences, the strongest Tennou had always been the most loyal to the Master.
"What do you want to do?" Ami asked, trying to draw the quiet Jadeite into the conversation.
All she gained from him was a noncommittal shrug and: "I don't know."
He must feel very uncomfortable here, Ami thought to herself. She couldn't blame him for that. She wondered how she would feel in his place.
"You're the same age as Mamoru, aren't you?" She again tried to tempt him into joining in.
"A year younger." Jadeite met her gaze, wondering perhaps why she was bothering with him.
"You could go to college?" Ami suggested shyly.
"How? They don't legally don't have identities in this country or anywhere else in the world." Makoto broke into the conversation.
"Yes we do." Nephrite surprised them all by saying. "When we woke up we were wearing civilian clothes and found that we had been given civilian identities and papers."
"Really?" Usagi had ceased her sobs and looked up. "That's neat!"
Ami couldn't help but smile at this childish observation. Nephrite humoured her and produced a wallet from his jacket. He tossed it to the pigtailed girl.
"Kimura Taro. Date of birth 29 May, place of birth Tokyo." Usagi read out loud. "I didn't know the Ginzuishou could do that!"
"What's your Earth name?" Makoto asked Jadeite.
"Ueda Masaki." Jadeite replied, still not quite sure what to make of the Senshi it would seem.
"What about Kunzite?"
"Tamura Kisho." Nephrite replied with a slight smirk as he added. "Although he's resisting the name."
"Why?" Makoto frowned.
"Because he was Shin before and he, despite what Mamoru-sama said, still feels as though he is bound to serve the Master, even in this life."
"You will all need time to adjust." Ami said to this. "Shall we use your Earth names now?"
"No." Nephrite shook his head, saying proudly to this: "We may have been reborn as human but we are still the Shitennou. I am still Nephrite no matter what pieces of paper may say."
Usagi giggled slightly at this self-important response but any humour in the conversation was cut short by Jadeite's next words.
"No." He shook his head and got up from the table. "We're not the Shitennou, not without Zoisite."
With that he left the room and silence befell the rest of the group.
"Nephrite?" Ami prompted him, looking for an explanation to Jadeite's out burst.
Nephrite sighed. "Jadeite always looked up to Zoisite in the past life, before Beryl's corruption tainted his soul. With that gone, we are all beginning to recall the bonds that we once shared. He will find this time difficult as his memory returns. We should leave him be for a while."
As he said this, the door swung open again. Ami expected to see Mamoru or perhaps Kunzite enter but it was Rei who stood hesitantly in the doorframe.
"Rei-chan?" Usagi whispered and Ami felt Nephrite tense. All of this… it was down to Rei in the end.
She stood trembling, searching each pair of eyes for something… anything. Ami looked to Makoto and Usagi who merely looked taken aback and unsure and then to Nephrite. He looked angry and made to stand but Ami caught the sleeve of the shirt he was wearing and gently shook her head 'no'.
"I'm sorry." Rei whispered and her trembling worsened. "I shouldn't… I shouldn't have come here."
"No." Ami said softly, her own words quiet but firm. "You should have come a lot sooner, Rei-chan."
With that she got up from her chair and crossed the room. When she reached Rei, Ami hugged her tightly and felt the other collapse against her, in relief or despair, Ami couldn't tell which.
At this action, Usagi and Makoto also joined her and Ami stood back as they, in turn, embraced Rei. They forgave her, too, Ami knew. They needed no words now. Despite everything, they had to try and rebuild their lives. All that had happened was in the past, as were their former lives. None of that mattered anymore.
Now they had the future to look to.
"Individually we choose our path. You cannot take on the consequences of another decision."
"I know, but it doesn't mean that we do not feel another's pain."
"All of our decisions have consequences, and some decisions are made because of these consequences."
"What do you mean?"
"Zoisite's decision,"
"He lives?"
"He does. But, unlike us, he has retained his Shitennou form."
Mamoru's footsteps echoed loudly on the tiled floor as he entered the planetarium. It was cold, despite the sun being out, and he shivered, partly due to this cold but more so in anticipation. After some persuading, he had convinced Kunzite that he was well enough rested to venture out. The oldest Tennou had been unhappy but understood that Mamoru needed to do this. Perhaps it was why he had mentioned Zoisite in the first place. Maybe he was even hoping that Mamoru could talk him around.
Kunzite had explained how they had been reborn but that Zoisite had resisted a second chance. Mamoru could understand why Zoisite felt as though he did not deserve his rebirth but his guardians had always been important to Mamoru and he was determined to help Zoisite in any way that he could.
Even though Mamoru wanted to see for himself that Usagi was okay, he forced all thoughts of the former Princess from his mind, for now at least.
Kunzite could not tell Mamoru where Zoisite was but Mamoru had a feeling that he would find him here. The planetarium seemed an appropriate place somehow and Mamoru was convinced that it would be somewhere that Zoisite would seek refuge now.
It was dark inside and Mamoru was unable to find a light switch. Instead he waited a while until his eyes became used to the gloom. Surveying his surroundings, he found himself drawn to the hall where they had met.
The door clicked softly closed behind him and, surely enough, Zoisite was standing alone in the middle of the room, as though he was expecting Mamoru. As if on cue, the Tennou turned around, his gaze hovering just below Mamoru's face, unable to look him in the eyes it would seem.
Then, as Mamoru approached, he dropped to his knees, his head bowed.
"Zoisite…" Mamoru trailed off, unsure where to even begin. Past events flashed before his mind's eye, recollections of the darkness that had enveloped his guardian.
Lowering his hand, Zoisite raised his head to meet Mamoru's astounded gaze. His eyes… Mamoru shuddered and forced himself to look away, to take in the rest of Zoisite's appearance in utter disbelief and horror.
His uniform, in appearance, had not changed. He still wore a long jacket and plain trousers, a belt tied tightly round his waist and jewels of various shapes and colours holding the lighter material that was his cape over one shoulder and then tied lower, around his waist. The uniform's appearance hadn't changed but the colouring certainly had. It had turned from its usual white to coal black, the piping from emerald green to dark silver. The cape remained silver, but the jewels holding it in place were now black. His hair also remained the same white, although it was longer and held together more securely with a black band. His short sword had been replaced by a broad sword resembling the one that Kunzite had fought with, although Zoisite's one was, like the rest of his uniform, completely black.
Forcing himself to look his guardian in the face once more, Mamoru was in time to see the white energy fade from his eyes as they too turned from pale blue to ebony black.
"Zoisite?" Mamoru whispered, wincing when he felt his guardian place a hand on his shoulder. Zoisite's hand burned him like a brand and Mamoru winced as tears sprang into his eyes. Zoisite smirked slightly at this and then, with considerable force, pushed him aside.
"Zoi--" Mamoru started to protest again, but the white haired king paid him little heed and continued his slow walk, his form shimmering whilst he did so until the teleport completely engulfed him and all that was left was a scattering of black rose petals in his wake.
"Master." Zoisite dared to speak, although his voice was low and almost inaudible.
Moving further forward, Mamoru asked Zoisite to stand but he refused, only lifting his head a little so that Mamoru might see the remorse and pain in his eyes; the pain of his betrayal.
Slowly, Zoisite unsheathed his sword from his belt and held the weapon out with a hand, offering it to Mamoru. Unsure, Mamoru took it and Zoisite bowed his head again, tensing as though waiting for something.
It was only then that Mamoru understood his actions and the sword fell from his hand and clanged loudly on the floor.
"Zoisite--" He started but his guardian cut him off by saying:
"Please Master. I betrayed you. You must take my life in return for this betrayal."
Aghast, Mamoru struggled to find words to counter this. "No." He settled for in the end. "We are not in the old kingdom anymore and I am not your Master."
"You are." Zoisite's voice was pained. "And you must punish me."
"Is that the only reason you came back? So I could kill you?"
Zoisite nodded before lowering his head again. "The Shitennou only exist to serve their Master."
Mamoru shook his head and angrily kicked the sword aside. "Why must you insist on this? Why must you dwell on the past life? The others have been reborn so why did you reject the gift that the Ginzuishou would have granted you? Why must you continue to cause yourself suffering?"
"I betrayed you."
"I don't care about that! I understand why things turned out the way that they did. Minako will forgive Rei so why can't I forgive you?"
Zoisite again looked up at the mention of Minako. "Venus… she lives?"
"She does but she's hurting. She needs you."
Zoisite shook his head, his eyes clearly showing the despair he was feeling. "Kill me." He again pleaded softly. "Master…"
"No." Mamoru refused, kneeling down so that he could look Zoisite in the eyes. "Death may bring you release but what about me? I will have to live with it! You and the others mean a lot to me. How dare you ask this of me?"
This time, Zoisite managed to hold Mamoru's gaze. "Master--"
"I'm not your Master, not anymore. I released the others from their duty and I'll do the same for you. I want you to have the same chance that they have so why can't you take it?"
"I can't." Zoisite whispered. "For me… it isn't the same. I can't…"
"You can't let go can you?" Mamoru answered for him bitterly. "You cannot let go of a life that no longer exists."
Zoisite stayed silent but Mamoru could see the regret in his eyes and it had been there since he had mentioned Minako.
"We have another chance, all of us including you. Take it. Don't hold onto this form. I don't need my guardians, but I do need you."
"I don't know…" Zoisite shook his head and Mamoru could tell that he was torn. Deep down he wanted this, he wanted to be with Minako, but his loyalties to Mamoru had always come first and did so now.
"It's up to you." Mamoru said with a sigh. "As I told you before, I am no longer your Master and you are no longer bound to me."
With those words, Mamoru turned and went on his way. There was nothing else he could do. Zoisite, he knew, would make his own choice and even if it weren't the choice that Mamoru hoped he would make, he would accept it.
I am no longer your Master and you are no longer bound to me
Zoisite stared after Mamoru, regret and self-loathing eating away at his heart. How could the Master do this to him? All his life he had only served Endymion but still he realised that he did not understand the Prince. He did not understand what motivated him at all. Endymion was not bound to the past life as the rest of them were. He did not understand the bonds between the Shitennou and their Master.
I'm not your Master, not anymore. I released the others from their duty and I'll do the same for you. I want you to have the same chance that they have so why can't you take it?
After everything, Zoisite could not quite believe that the Master had forgiven him, had released him. Never in the past life had a Master granted freedom to his guardians. It was unheard of, especially to one who had betrayed him.
Zoisite had longed for death, anything to rid himself of the tainted blackness that had grasped hold of his soul. It was all he had wanted, since his rebirth and thus had resisted the changes that the Ginzuishou would have forced upon him. His Shitennou form was as real as his human one now and he could slip between them both, although he had yet to do so. Zoisite felt unworthy of his guardianship but as well as he had not earned his freedom. He had done nothing to secure the redemption that had been granted to him. The Master seemed to think that words would be enough to dispel the pain but this was not the case. It would never be enough.
"The Dark Kingdom is changing. You must leave. Now."
"What? Zoisite, I don't understand"
"You shouldn't have come here, Venus."
"Why? Despite all this… despite everything that you have said and done, I still love you. I need to know if you feel the same way about me. I have to know."
"I am not capable of such feelings"
So many lies had been spoken, so many atrocities had been committed and the Master thought that by pushing his guardians away he could somehow put an end to it. The past life was forever doomed to repeat itself and they had to be prepared. Zoisite knew this better than most. His duty was to Endymion first and foremost but yet he was unable to completely force the memories of his time with Minako from his mind.
"I am worried about the Master. Kunzite is so full of bitterness. I fear what he will do if I let them alone for too long."
"You can leave. I do not wish for you to stay if it is going to get you into trouble."
"I'll stay. I do not wish to see you unhappy, Minako-chan."
"Just you being here is enough."
She had always come second best and had rarely complained. She understood his loyalty to Endymion for she had her own loyalties to the Princess. They were two dedicated soldiers thrown together by fate. They understood each other. Venus was the only one who could relate to his feelings and he to hers. Venus would always look out for the Princess, even though as Aino Minako she held no power. Zoisite had chosen to retain his. He would never be satisfied in any other way and nor would Kunzite, although he was human now, and the Master had known this. Nephrite and Jadeite could make their own lives but the two oldest Tennou would always protect the Master. Kunzite, as Shin, had escaped Beryl's corruption for a while, but even he had not been strong enough to resist Metallia's hold in the end.
"Just you being here is enough."
The half-life he had been living had been enough for Minako then and she alone would understand that a part of him would always belong in the past life; open to corruption by those stronger than he.
We have another chance, all of us including you. Take it. Don't hold onto this form.
The Master did not understand that, in human form, they were nothing, that they could not protect him. Zoisite knew that he just wanted them to have the freedom that, under the laws of the old kingdom, could never be allowed. Zoisite would not fully accept this freedom for he had much to atone for but, Endymion was right, he could not continue to live among the humans in this form.
It will end here. The fate of the Earth and the Moon matters than our own happiness. Perhaps one day, in a different life, there will be a chance to… for now we will go our separate ways.
Zoisite felt a pang deep down inside of him as he recalled their conversation of long ago. Was this the life that they had spoken on with such hope? Was he taking the second chance they had wanted and throwing it away? Of course he must be but Zoisite had never dreamt of a time where he did not serve his Master.
I don't need my guardians, but I do need you
Zoisite did not understand such emotions but he did understand the Master. Endymion had always been ruled by his heart and had displayed more affection for his Shitennou than his father had done. Zoisite wanted to be on hand to defend his Master as much as he wanted Minako but slowly he was beginning to see that he could have both in this world. His loyalty would remain, as would his love for Minako.
Don't hold onto this form
He felt some relief as his Shitennou form shimmered and then was replaced by his human one. Yet he had not forsaken it, but merely cast it aside, for now. He would live the life that Endymion had intended he did but, if he were ever needed, he could protect his Master again.
"Just you being here is enough."
Zoisite closed his eyes as her words echoed throughout his mind. He would go to Minako, and would be with her… if she could forgive him…
Lost in the darkness, try to find your way home
I want to embrace you and never let you go
Almost hope you're in heaven so no one can harm your soul
Living in agony cause I just do not know
Where you are
Minako sat in her hotel room, staring silently at her reflection in the mirror as Satchou continued to talk behind her. Artemis stayed motionless on the dresser in front of her, playing the plushie role that he was used to. She had finally found it within herself to return to the hotel and had been caught by Satchou as soon as she had done so. He wanted to talk about her decision to duet with Sakamoto Chizu for her forthcoming single, after all they were rivals, he had questioned but he didn't know the truth. Sakamoto Chizu… Kuroki Mio… Minako had felt terrible that she has wronged Chizu so and was determined to, in a small way, make it up to her.
She had wronged many people but she had been granted this second chance to make it all right again… well for most of them anyway.
She had managed to regain her composure in front of her staff but now, now that she was alone again, Minako felt the barrier that she had put in place begin the crumble again. She turned away, not wanting Artemis to see her tears again. Fate hadn't granted her the chance to save him. She had saved the world but lost her own.
Stop it, Minako tried to tell herself. Why had she allowed herself to become so fragile? She had been through worse than this. She had faced death and survived. She was strong enough to get through this.
They why does it feel as though my whole world has shattered?
Getting up, Minako paced up and down a few times before she came to a stop in front of the dresser. Looking at her reflection in the mirror, she was taken aback by the dark circles under her eyes and the worn look to her face. She had aged a few years, Minako realised. The mission and the sorrow that accompanied it had aged her and this added to her regrets. She thought back to before, before she had become Sailor V. Her life before then had seemed almost empty and Minako knew that, despite all the pain, she would never go back to that life for a moment. She could still become Sailor V – even though the Dark Kingdom was gone there were people in the city that still needed protection and she would give them this.
I'll find you somewhere
I'll keep on trying until my dying day
I just need to know whatever has happened
The truth will free my soul
Wherever you are, I won't stop searching
Whatever it takes, I need to know
I'll find you somewhere
I'll keep on trying until my dying day
I just need to know whatever has happened
The truth will free my soul
Her decision made, Minako looked up once more but was stunned at the reflection that she saw in the mirror. She was no longer alone.
The man standing a little way behind her was so agonisingly familiar that Minako at first didn't dare believe it was true. How could he be standing here? He had died. She had been with him as he slipped away.
But so had the others… if they could come back then perhaps…
Minako trembled and slowly, as though afraid that he would disappear, turned around. The apparition remained and Minako realised, with an indescribable joy that he was real and not a product of her despair.
"Zoisite?" Minako broke the silence between them to whisper his name, her voice strained with emotion and she did not know whether to be relieved or angry with him.
"I'm sorry." These first words that he uttered infuriated Minako somehow and she went to him and, before she herself even realised what she was doing, she slapped him hard across the cheek. The blow echoed loudly in the small hotel room and Minako drew back instantly feeling shame at her actions. Tears that she had so far suppressed broke through now but Minako evaded his attempt to comfort her.
"How could you?" She began, her voice choked and wavering. "How could you do that to me?"
"Minako," Artemis whispered with a wince in his voice but Minako paid little heed to the cat.
Zoisite, in his civilian form, just shook his head unable to answer her question. Bitterly disappointed at his inaction, Minako stood still, fighting with herself it would seem.
"You said you loved me once before? Was that nothing but words?"
"I do not remember much of my past. We live for today."
Had she misjudged him? Minako just didn't know what to think anymore. Their relationship had been tainted by the shadow of the past life for so long and now that the shadow was gone, she was left feeling unsure. Her feelings were still there but Minako didn't know if it could ever work between them. There had been so much hurt and so much pain. They had both been through so much and now all they were left with was their memories. Perhaps it had been too much for them. Zoisite's betrayal and then Rei's corruption… perhaps nothing could ever be the same again?
"Why did you leave it so long?" Minako questioned at last. She knew that to mention such things would only cause her more pain but she had to know what his intentions were. She had to know where she stood with him. "I thought you had died."
"I did." Zoisite answered her softly. "But then I was reborn, but the Shitennou have no place in this world. Everything has changed. The Master no longer needs our protection but we are still here."
Endymion… Minako thought bitterly. Even now all he could think of was the Prince.
"The Shitennou have to have a purpose," Zoisite continued as he took a step closer to her. "Without it our path becomes lost. Yet this purpose has changed. My Tennou form is still a part of me but I have embraced my civilian form as well. I can live a normal life, as can you, but if needed it is there."
"But you did." Minako replied. "You died." She shuddered at the recollection and how she had wished for a second chance, a second chance that had now been granted to them.
Then this… this is our fate after all
"I did." Zoisite agreed quietly, "And, as in the past life, I had thought that my destiny was to protect Endymion but now I can see that the mistakes of the past life are no longer being repeated. We were reborn for a different purpose. We were reborn to have the lives that were so long denied us."
"I don't understand…" Minako trembled, feeling her anger beginning to melt away. This was all she had ever wanted. No matter how strong she tried to be, she knew that she couldn't do it alone anymore.
"I was reborn to be with you."
At his words, Minako closed the gap between them, reaching up to pull him down into a needful kiss. Tears spilled down her cheeks as she recalled how it had all started so many years ago when the world wasn't the same as it was now. Their feelings for each other, like Usagi and Mamoru's, had transcended lives and countless ages. There was so much that had yet to be discussed between them but right now Minako let it all fade into the background.
Living for the moment…
Right now Minako wouldn't have this any other way.
End.
A/N: It's finally finished! I apologise to everyone who has stuck with this so long that I kept you all waiting - hopefully this nice long (and happy!) epilogue made up for all that. The song used in this final chapter is 'Somewhere' by the band Within Temptation. Those of you who have also read my EGPE series will recognise the Shitennou's human names from that. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed reading the final chapter. If you have read this far, please leave me a review and let me know what you thought. Thanks. Shari