Jack tilted his head and ogled freely as James left, still looking a bit touched in the head. Well, that hadn't been so very difficult after all. He'd be sure to thank the lass next time they docked in Tortuga. Perhaps he'd even take the good commodore along.

Running around all morning had left him with a strong desire to collapse where he stood. Most likely that was no longer in the cards, at least not until he'd gotten James to unwind even further, but he was still disinclined to set one foot outside that door. The office would have to do.

Jack glanced around it. Not the ideal location, but he'd had worse to work with. He drew the heavy linen curtains closed, after grinning down at James amidst the confused citizens far below. The necessity of clearing off the desk really depended on how limber James might be. Jack was very much looking forward to finding that out.

First things first, though – he stripped off his coat and vest, unwound the sash around his waist, unbuckled his belt, tugged his boots and socks off. He left the breeches temporarily while he deliberated over where to place his discarded clothing. James was absolutely the type to fold everything into immaculate little squares, but Jack was averse to the very idea. He finally decided that a suitable compromise was kicking the pile into a corner of the room.

"That was certainly a task I wouldn't wish on..." James gave up on words entirely, standing in the doorway and staring mostly impolitely.

Jack leaned back against the desk, enjoying what was happening to James' pupils. "Shut the door, would you? I don't fancy givin' your boys a free show."

James' lips twitched. "Not even Lieutenant Groves?"

"Certainly not! Why should he get to look upon you a second time when I've not gotten to a first yet?" He cocked his head to the side, frowning as a thought occurred to him. "It would be the second time, eh? Not a third or fourth or seventeenth?"

"Captain Sparrow," said James in that low, smooth, seduction-flavored voice of his, "jealousy is ill-suited to your complexion."

Jack clapped a hand over his heart. "I'm wounded, truly I am."

The speed with which James crossed the room surprised him, but he quickly got over it and chose to be delighted instead. James caught his wrists, stroking the pads of his thumbs along bone and blue vein. When he pressed a kiss to Jack's pulse, the way it leaped made Jack pull in a shallow breath.

"Everything restored to order?" he asked, more determined than ever to assure their complete and total privacy.

James' mouth curved sardonically. "I told them there'd been an outbreak of influenza, side effects being severe hallucinations and temporary memory loss." He turned his head to let Jack pull on the tie holding his hair back. Freed, it fell thick and straight nearly to his shoulders, colored a rich, earthy brown. Jack's hand found its way into it before he could form a thought, curling and sliding and stroking. The smile softened and James let out a sigh, looking at Jack through half-lidded green eyes.

"Clever of you. And that's enough small talk, don't you think?" he murmured.

"God yes," said James. Jack chucled, pulling him down for a kiss more sure than the one before it, but still new and shiny.

The heavy blue coat went the way of the hair ribbon, James rolling his shoulders to let Jack peel it off and drop it on the chair. To his consternation, Jack found himself divested of his breeches before he could make another move. Although being able to move his hips against James' with one less hindrance was a welcome development, the current state of affairs was far too uneven for Jack's liking. Tearing inelegantly at the buttons in James' starched shirt, he set about trying to rectify the mistake.

James was mouthing desperate things against his neck and writhing deliciously when a small sneeze interrupted them.

"Ignore it, 's the hallucinations," Jack mumbled into his hair.

James' shoulders shook with silent laughter. "You do understand I made that up?" He kissed Jack again, but it was a distracted, half-interested thing. "I think it came from my closet," he said, pulling away and straightening what remained of his shirt. Jack pouted, but wrapped himself in James' coat nonetheless, turning his face to the collar and breathing in the scent of talc and sea air, which was a surprisingly agreeable combination.

He tiptoed behind James, peeking over his shoulder as he pulled open the door to the tiny closet in the far wall.

The two of them stared at their discovery for a moment, speechless.

Lieutenant Gillette peered fearfully up at them. "I – I don't know how I came to be here, sir, but..." He glanced down at his own huddled body. "I seem to be having a slight case of nudity."

"No you aren't, mate" said Jack, trying to be helpful. James raised his eyebrows and Jack shrugged. "There's the big red velvet bow an' all." When James' expression didn't alter, Jack back away slowly. "I'll just, er, get meself dressed and leave you to deal with the whole naked problem."

"Wait," said James anxiously. He bit his lip and looked down at his lieutenant. "Andrew, if you'll excuse me for a moment?"

"Of course," said Gillette, adjusting his bow.

James shut the door again, watching silently as Jack gathered up his clothes. He was alarmed to find his hands shaking. No matter; he'd soon be out of this town, on the dawn tide if he could help it. The whole debacle had been a mistake – to think that he'd put faith in the sorcerous workings of a whore who was probably stark raving mad during her off hours. Ludicrous, that was what it was, and he'd do himself a favor by getting clear before the commodore's good senses reasserted themselves.

He was struggling to knot his sash satisfactorily when James' hands glided into his field of vision, holding a key.

"Here." His voice was soft, probably to prevent being overheard by the poor fellow in the closet. "My house is down Bluestone Lane, the third one on the left with the lilacs out front." He pressed the key into Jack's palm, closing his fingers over them. Jack looked up at him, and his damnable tremors stopped.

"Don't be long, now," he said huskily, leaning in to kiss James once more, well and long, so that his eyes were glazed over when Jack pulled away.

He was still looking tottery as Jack skipped to the door and said over his shoulder, "Else I might be tempted to seek out dearest Teddy and bring on another bout of flu."

"Bloody pirate," he could hear James mutter, but there was reluctant pride in his voice. Jack smiled to himself and clutched the key. He was fond of lilacs. He was even more fond of the treatment he was sure to get when James came home to find him covered in the fragrant things. If James hadn't been lying when he professed his disbelief in magic, a night with Jack Sparrow was sure to convince him otherwise - especially a night following a day in which he'd built up a great deal of frustrated energy.

One year after the unusual epidemic of flu, Port Royal's skilled doctors, healers, and midwives were still unable to explain its cause. They did find, however, an increased demand for their services regarding expectant mothers in the ensuing months. Back in town only three weeks after his last visit, Jack merely smiled when Elizabeth exclaimed over the anomoly, and kissed infant Billy on the cheek, and went to call on the commodore.

"That's enough small talk, don't you think?" -- Olivia to Giles, "Hush" (BtVS)

"I seem to be having a slight case of nudity." -- Buffy to Oz, "Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered" (BtVS)