Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate, I just like to play with them. MGM owns Stargate and all its characters etc etc. I wrote this story for fun, and no money is involved at all.
A/N: Not much of a point, just a little silly something I put together on the weekend as a little break from Nine Lives. It was supposed to be short, but I tend to get carried away. Anyway, I'll get back to Nine Lives, now that my writer's block is cured. Not that I don't know where I'm going on the other story, just sometimes my mind refuses to let me write what I want it to. Besides I got this idea in my head and it wanted out. Anyway, forgive me if it's a little rough in spots, I still don't have a beta, (unless you count my cat) so its just me and I tend to miss stuff.
Summary: Sam asks the guys for a favor. We've all been or will be in similar situation of need. The men will cringe and sympathize, and the women will howl with laughter.
Set season four or five or six or thereabouts. The timeline isn't really important in this story, and there are no spoilers that I know of.
Chapter 1
Colonel Jack O'Neill parked his large black 4x4 at the curb outside of Major Samantha Carter's house, and looked around at his teammates. Daniel was seated in the front middle seat, holding the small paper bag of various medications and dressings. Teal'c was crammed into the back on the jump seat because Major Carter, by virtue of the bulky cast covering her right leg from foot and ankle to mid thigh wouldn't fit back there.
"Alright kids, lets get Carter settled." Jack said, than as he noticed Sam starting to unbuckle her seatbelt and open the door, he barked out "Ah ah Carter! You stay put."
"Sir, I'm fine, really..." Sam started, but the Colonel interrupted again, "Carter, that wasn't a request." Sam scowled and looked down at her lap, glaring at her cast. She didn't reply, but she wasn't trying to get out of the truck anymore. Jack got out of the truck, allowing Daniel to slide out before tilting the seat to allow the large Jaffa to unfold himself from the back seat. As Teal'c climbed out Jack reached into the back of the truck grabbing Sam's crutches and carrying case containing her laptop and some papers she'd wanted from her lab. Daniel headed up to sidewalk to Sam's front door to unlock it.
"Teal'c, help Carter into the house would you buddy?" Jack asked. Teal'c nodded solemnly. "Indeed O'Neill, I would be most pleased to assist Major Carter." He replied as he started around to Carter's side of the truck.
Sam started to protest as she saw he CO heading into the house with her crutches. She could walk perfectly fine. Well perfectly fine with crutches. Sam sighed as Teal'c opened the passenger side door. She forced her scowl away. Teal'c wasn't to blame for the Colonel's over protectiveness, and it wasn't fair to take her frustration out on him. Giving into the inevitable, Sam surrendered herself to the strong arms of Teal'c as he gently and carefully lifted her out of the truck, and carried her towards the house.
Sam hated to admit it but she really was exhausted, not to mention sore in too many places to list. She let her head drop on Teal'c's shoulder as she recounted the circumstances that led to the reason she was getting carted around by a group of very over protective men.
It had been a routine mission on P3X-925; the MALP had shown the possible presence of an abandoned naquadah mine. Daniel was poking through the ruins of a small village, likely the homes of the miners before the mine had been abandoned. Teal'c and the Colonel had been patrolling the perimeter, and looking for anything interesting. Sam as usual was collecting soil samples. She was walking back to where Daniel was when she found an abandoned mineshaft by dint of falling into it.
Fortunately for Sam, the mineshaft hadn't been very deep. Unfortunately, it traveled nearly 20 feet down at a slant and was littered with boulders and jagged rocks. Sam thought she must have hit every rock and outcropping on the way down before landing in an inglorious heap at the bottom of the shaft. She'd never lost consciousness, but her leg had been broken in the fall, and she had numerous bruises and several bad cuts including a deep gash on her right upper arm.
It had taken the men nearly two hours to carry her out of the hole on a makeshift stretcher they'd rigged with pack frames and tent canvas. It was several more hours for them to carry her back. She'd given in and allowed them to give her Morphine for the return trip so she didn't really remember much of that part.
Sam had awoken several hours later, not too surprised to find her teammates in various poses, keeping vigil over her while she slept. Daniel was seated in a chair on her left, nose buried in some text. Teal'c sat cross- legged on the floor near the wall on her right, with the Colonel just past Teal'c, seated on the bed, playing with his yo-yo. They'd quickly retrieved Dr. Warner upon seeing her awake. Janet was out of town with Cassie, visiting relatives.
Doctor Warner had agreed to release Sam, provided she proved that she could eat and tolerate the pain pills, and as long as someone accompanied her to her house to settle her in. He didn't think that someone needed to stay with her at all times, but had cautioned her to stay off her feet as much as possible for the next few days and that someone should check on her frequently. She'd been really lucky, other than the broken leg, the rest of her injuries were mostly a collection of bruises and scrapes. The rest of SG-1 had quickly volunteered for the task of taking Sam home and she had quickly found herself eating some toast and dutifully swallowing some tablets. By late morning she had been whisked off to the Colonel's truck in a wheelchair before she could even protest. Not that she minded getting out of the infirmary as soon as possible.
Sam's mind wandered back to the present as Teal'c entered her living room, and gently settled her on the couch, mindful of the cast and the worst of her injuries. The cuts on her arm and head had needed quite a few stitches in each, and were just a bit sore. Daniel and Jack descended on as Teal'c set her down, her propping her leg with pillows and covering her in a blanket. She'd been handed the remote and told her to amuse herself, while the three men went into her kitchen to fix lunch.
Sam smiled in amusement as she heard them arguing over what to make and discussing the state of her refrigerator. Sam hadn't bothered to stock up on anything since she'd known they were going off world. She also may have forgotten to clear some things out, having been busy with several projects recently. She suspected that there were several things in there that might be trying to become new life forms. So she wasn't too surprised when the three trooped back to her living room announcing that some grocery shopping was in order. Sam did scowl at them when Daniel declared her fridge a biohazard and Jack joked that he'd nearly called in a Code 3 team. Her fridge wasn't that bad.
The men started planning a shopping list, Daniel taking notes, as Sam became aware of a mild cramping sensation, low in her abdomen. She frowned, and quickly did some mental calculations. Going off world so often she tended to lose track of time. Coming up with the right numbers Sam realized it was now that time of the month. She sighed softly, these things never seemed to come at a good time and having to deal with that and her injuries, including the awkward cast made her think she must have angered some god out there. Oh well, on the bright side, when else could you take such strong medicine for menstrual cramps Sam thought glancing at the bag containing her medicine that Daniel had left on her coffee table.
Sam frowned as she remembered something. She was supposed to have picked up some pads, as she was nearly out. But just as she'd been planning on going out on some much needed errands, she'd been paged back to the SGC to fix some error with the dialing computer, and one thing had led to another and she'd never gotten to pick up the things she'd needed, intending to do so once this latest mission was over.
Daniel noticed her frown, and immediately concerned, he asked if she was ok, which caught Teal'c and Jack's attention immediately. The stopped talking to regard her, and she hastened to reassure them. "I'm fine guys, really. Its just that... well... ummm.... Sam trailed off. She really needed some supplies. Normally she'd just ask Janet to pick up some for her, but Janet wasn't available. The guys were going out after all, but still, Sam was reluctant to ask them for something so personal. She felt her cheeks start to warm.
The Colonel was watching her, and seemed to sense her discomfort. "What is it Carter, you need something while we are out?"
Sam's blush deepened. She looked at her hands, her lap, and the table. She looked anywhere but at the guys. "Ijustneedsomemaxipads." She mumbled all in a rush. Facing down a ghould with a hand device pointed at her she could do. Ask her friends and teammates, let alone her CO, to pick up something so necessary, but so personal, and she was more nervous than when she'd gone on her first date.
At the guys' blank stares, Sam sighed. She closed her eyes, and repeated herself, more slowly and more clearly this time. "Maxi pads. I need some maxi pads. Sir."
Realization dawned on Jack and Daniel's faces, Teal'c just looked confused. Daniel blushed, and an awkward silence fell.
The Colonel shifted, and coughed, breaking the silence, he answered "Uh, yeah, sure Carter. Anything." He was looking anywhere but at her.
Sam thought if her cheeks got any warmer, she might spontaneously combust. "Umm, here give me the pad, I'll write down what I need." Daniel passed the list over, and Sam quickly wrote down the name of the brand she preferred and what she wanted, as the three men started to argue boisterously over who was going to stay with Sam and who was to go out for the groceries and other "necessities" Actually Daniel and Jack argued, Teal'c tried to ask what maxi pads were but the other two kept interrupting him. In other circumstances, Sam would have laughed, but her head had started to ache at the near bickering. The thought of being trapped in her house with one of the guys after her embarrassing admission was too much to bear. "Why don't you all go?" She snapped, surprising herself with her vehemence.
The guys looked surprised too, as they stared at her in shock, almost taking a step back.
Sam winced, and sighed, shaking her head. "Sorry guys, I'm just tired. I'll be fine, really I will be. It shouldn't take you long and I promise I'll stay right here, I won't even move."
Sam thought they gave in rather easily when Jack announced that all three of them would go, but really all three men had all been married at one point in time or another, and they all knew when best to keep their distance from the women in their lives. Now was one such time.
Quickly, the three men made sure Sam was comfortable, and that she had a drink and a light snack of some crackers they'd found, as well as the phone, her medicine, and crutches all in easy reach. The admonished her to stay there until they returned promising to be swift before piling off in Jack's truck. Teal'c had tried to ask what maxi pads were again before they left but the Colonel had elbowed him and Daniel had grabbed his arm dragging him out the door promising to explain later. Sam let out a relieved sigh as the door closed and she heard the truck pull off. Closing her eyes she leaned back and let herself finally relax.