Disclaimer : I don't own a thing.
Summery : Every team has it's stars, every team has it's heart throbs, every team has it's little guys, these are the guys who get overlooked time and time again, these are the guys that hurt just as much as the heart throbs and the stars, but no-one ever seems to notice.
Chapter 1
I followed the team – get that, followed the team on the lap of victory around the rink. Yet another game had been played and won, yet again had I managed to score, yet again was I not recognised for the goal, but recognised for the minute of comedy I had given the crowd after the goal. I was Luis Mendoza, spedster, the unstoppable, so unstoppable even I couldn't stop myself. I joined the rest of the team as we filed off the ice and into the locker rooms, where talk continued about the great game we had just played.
"Great goal Banks". Charlie patted his best friends shoulder, as the room uproared even more and congratulations were thrown at Banks, Charlie and Fulton for their input in the game.
Funny no one ever thought to congratulate me on my input, even though I managed to score at least once during each game we played. No-one ever said 'great goal Luis' to me, or said anything to show they actually noticed me. I had a long time ago accepted that I wasn't the most popular duck, but it seemed the only way to get myself noticed was to chase after girls. I had once said something to Dwayne about being stuck in the background all the time, but he didn't really understand where I was coming from, and I'm sure he thought it was just jealousy. Maybe I was jealous, jealous of the people who were supposed to be my best friends, they were all recognised for the right reasons, but me, I was recognised for everything I didn't want recognising for.
I mean Charlie was the captain, the faithful, fearless leader that led us to our many victories. Adam, the star player, could out skate, and out play any of us. Fulton and Portman, bash brothers who everyone feared and would never cross. Julie one of two girls on a boys team, could stop just about any puck. Russ, the player who could get a goal from just about anywhere in the rink. Need I carry on.
If only I had stayed with my old team. Sure they weren't anything like the ducks, they hadn't been as good a friends as the ducks, but at least my talent was noticed, would you believe I was once 'the star player', the one everyone noticed, the one who got congratulated after a goal.
"So Luis, who you going out with tonight"? Ken asked.
"Marie". I answered, in my usual happy go lucky tone.
No-one ever really understood the reason I went after girls like I did. Hell I don't think I even did. It was a mixture between wanting to prove I was at least good at one thing, and to prove I was as far from alike to my old man as possible. I remember everything as though it was yesterday.
FLASHBACK
I rushed home early after hockey practice. I had just been told, I was wanted to play in the Junior Goodwill Games, playing for my country, what greater honor was there. Normally I wouldn't have been home for another hour, but I was hardly containing my excitement about telling my folks my great news, that Coach let me go early. I almost burst through the front door.
"MOM"! I hollered. "DAD"! I continued calling them both, dashing into each room in search. I was just about to give up hope and head for my room, to put my hockey gear away, when I heard whisperings coming from my parents room. I barged through the slightly ajar door, to find my mom half naked, straddling a man on the bed. The worst part being, the man, wasn't, my dad.
"Luis". My mom said in shock.
I backed out of the room, dropping my hockey bag from my shoulder in the process. I started to run, bounding down the stairs and out of the house as fast as my legs would carry me. I ended up back at school, hiding out in the oak tree that overlooked the football field. I kept seeing her with him, imagining my dads face when he found out. At a mere 12 years old, I knew it was me who would end up telling my dad, she wouldn't, she'd have a mother-son chat with me and explain things, bribing me into not breathing a word. But I was determined not to let her get to me, determined that she would tell my dad, or I would. I hid there for the rest of the evening, not wanting or daring to go home. I suppose it was fear, fear that the longer I stayed, the more my dad would be mad at me for running out like that, but then a different fear took over. The fear that if I did go home, I would have to explain everything, see her. By the time I climbed down, it must have been late, as the sky was now a navy blue colour, and the only light, being from a near by street lamp. I headed home, but by no means did I hurry myself. I got as far as the front lawn when my mom and dad ran out to me. My dad reached me first and engulfed me into a hug, my mom however stood a few steps away. I could tell she'd been crying, her eyes were red and her cheeks tear stained. Guilt took over then, but I fought it hard.
My dad took me straight to bed, but weirdly, asked for no explanations, just simply told me never to run off like that again. I wanted to tell him, but my inner self told me to let her have a chance, they had obviously been too worried about me to have a chance to talk. The next morning, my alarm didn't go off and no one woke me up in time for school. When I awoke, my mom had gone to work and my dad was sat in the kitchen waiting for me.
"Luis, mom told me what happened yesterday". He finally told me.
"What kinda lies did she fill you with"? I answered sharply.
"She didn't. See, I knew". He replied.
"You knew. You knew, that she was betraying you, cheating behind your back, being unfaithful". I shouted.
"It's complicated Luis. See, both me and your mom, well we both love each other, and always will do. We love each other because we both gave each other a blessing in the form of you. But we are two very different people. 2 years ago, I began having different feelings, I told your mom about these feelings, and well we decided that we no longer could remain as we had been. But we stayed together because of you".
"What are you saying"? I was confused and wasn't really following what he was trying to tell me.
"Luis, I'm gay".
"You're, you're WHAT"? I stood up, knocking the chair to floor. "But you, you can't. You sleep with mom". I stuttered.
"Luis, calm down, come here". He reached over to me, but I pulled away as if his touch would burn me.
Again, I found myself running, running away from the pain. I ended up and my Gran's. I didn't need to say anything, but funnily enough she had no idea about my mom or dad. From that day onwards I lived with her, well until I went to the JGG. I felt betrayed by both my parents, but I knew I still loved them, but not understanding them, made it difficult to be around them.
END FLASHBACK
So now you know, now you know why I chase after girls, as if to prove that I'm not gay, yet I never cheat on them, I know the pain of cheating, and I NEVER want to feel that again.
I find myself, asking myself when am I gonna change and settle for a more permanent girlfriend, become more than just a background face of the ducks. The answers is always the same – not until college, it's too late to change, I have to be good old dependable Luis Mendoza, background face and a ladies man.
So what do you think? PLEASE R&R!!!!
Summery : Every team has it's stars, every team has it's heart throbs, every team has it's little guys, these are the guys who get overlooked time and time again, these are the guys that hurt just as much as the heart throbs and the stars, but no-one ever seems to notice.
Chapter 1
I followed the team – get that, followed the team on the lap of victory around the rink. Yet another game had been played and won, yet again had I managed to score, yet again was I not recognised for the goal, but recognised for the minute of comedy I had given the crowd after the goal. I was Luis Mendoza, spedster, the unstoppable, so unstoppable even I couldn't stop myself. I joined the rest of the team as we filed off the ice and into the locker rooms, where talk continued about the great game we had just played.
"Great goal Banks". Charlie patted his best friends shoulder, as the room uproared even more and congratulations were thrown at Banks, Charlie and Fulton for their input in the game.
Funny no one ever thought to congratulate me on my input, even though I managed to score at least once during each game we played. No-one ever said 'great goal Luis' to me, or said anything to show they actually noticed me. I had a long time ago accepted that I wasn't the most popular duck, but it seemed the only way to get myself noticed was to chase after girls. I had once said something to Dwayne about being stuck in the background all the time, but he didn't really understand where I was coming from, and I'm sure he thought it was just jealousy. Maybe I was jealous, jealous of the people who were supposed to be my best friends, they were all recognised for the right reasons, but me, I was recognised for everything I didn't want recognising for.
I mean Charlie was the captain, the faithful, fearless leader that led us to our many victories. Adam, the star player, could out skate, and out play any of us. Fulton and Portman, bash brothers who everyone feared and would never cross. Julie one of two girls on a boys team, could stop just about any puck. Russ, the player who could get a goal from just about anywhere in the rink. Need I carry on.
If only I had stayed with my old team. Sure they weren't anything like the ducks, they hadn't been as good a friends as the ducks, but at least my talent was noticed, would you believe I was once 'the star player', the one everyone noticed, the one who got congratulated after a goal.
"So Luis, who you going out with tonight"? Ken asked.
"Marie". I answered, in my usual happy go lucky tone.
No-one ever really understood the reason I went after girls like I did. Hell I don't think I even did. It was a mixture between wanting to prove I was at least good at one thing, and to prove I was as far from alike to my old man as possible. I remember everything as though it was yesterday.
FLASHBACK
I rushed home early after hockey practice. I had just been told, I was wanted to play in the Junior Goodwill Games, playing for my country, what greater honor was there. Normally I wouldn't have been home for another hour, but I was hardly containing my excitement about telling my folks my great news, that Coach let me go early. I almost burst through the front door.
"MOM"! I hollered. "DAD"! I continued calling them both, dashing into each room in search. I was just about to give up hope and head for my room, to put my hockey gear away, when I heard whisperings coming from my parents room. I barged through the slightly ajar door, to find my mom half naked, straddling a man on the bed. The worst part being, the man, wasn't, my dad.
"Luis". My mom said in shock.
I backed out of the room, dropping my hockey bag from my shoulder in the process. I started to run, bounding down the stairs and out of the house as fast as my legs would carry me. I ended up back at school, hiding out in the oak tree that overlooked the football field. I kept seeing her with him, imagining my dads face when he found out. At a mere 12 years old, I knew it was me who would end up telling my dad, she wouldn't, she'd have a mother-son chat with me and explain things, bribing me into not breathing a word. But I was determined not to let her get to me, determined that she would tell my dad, or I would. I hid there for the rest of the evening, not wanting or daring to go home. I suppose it was fear, fear that the longer I stayed, the more my dad would be mad at me for running out like that, but then a different fear took over. The fear that if I did go home, I would have to explain everything, see her. By the time I climbed down, it must have been late, as the sky was now a navy blue colour, and the only light, being from a near by street lamp. I headed home, but by no means did I hurry myself. I got as far as the front lawn when my mom and dad ran out to me. My dad reached me first and engulfed me into a hug, my mom however stood a few steps away. I could tell she'd been crying, her eyes were red and her cheeks tear stained. Guilt took over then, but I fought it hard.
My dad took me straight to bed, but weirdly, asked for no explanations, just simply told me never to run off like that again. I wanted to tell him, but my inner self told me to let her have a chance, they had obviously been too worried about me to have a chance to talk. The next morning, my alarm didn't go off and no one woke me up in time for school. When I awoke, my mom had gone to work and my dad was sat in the kitchen waiting for me.
"Luis, mom told me what happened yesterday". He finally told me.
"What kinda lies did she fill you with"? I answered sharply.
"She didn't. See, I knew". He replied.
"You knew. You knew, that she was betraying you, cheating behind your back, being unfaithful". I shouted.
"It's complicated Luis. See, both me and your mom, well we both love each other, and always will do. We love each other because we both gave each other a blessing in the form of you. But we are two very different people. 2 years ago, I began having different feelings, I told your mom about these feelings, and well we decided that we no longer could remain as we had been. But we stayed together because of you".
"What are you saying"? I was confused and wasn't really following what he was trying to tell me.
"Luis, I'm gay".
"You're, you're WHAT"? I stood up, knocking the chair to floor. "But you, you can't. You sleep with mom". I stuttered.
"Luis, calm down, come here". He reached over to me, but I pulled away as if his touch would burn me.
Again, I found myself running, running away from the pain. I ended up and my Gran's. I didn't need to say anything, but funnily enough she had no idea about my mom or dad. From that day onwards I lived with her, well until I went to the JGG. I felt betrayed by both my parents, but I knew I still loved them, but not understanding them, made it difficult to be around them.
END FLASHBACK
So now you know, now you know why I chase after girls, as if to prove that I'm not gay, yet I never cheat on them, I know the pain of cheating, and I NEVER want to feel that again.
I find myself, asking myself when am I gonna change and settle for a more permanent girlfriend, become more than just a background face of the ducks. The answers is always the same – not until college, it's too late to change, I have to be good old dependable Luis Mendoza, background face and a ladies man.
So what do you think? PLEASE R&R!!!!