The swinging doors creaked loudly on unoiled hinges. Standard Army-issue boots clunked on the wooden floor. Heavy black robes rustled. Throats were cleared uncomfortably. The lights flickered.

Colonel Potter seated himself in the chair behind his desk and clasped his hands behind his head, observing the silent pranksters. They knew they had been caught, and they knew they were in serious trouble. The worst of their punishment, if they recieved one, wouldn't come from Potter, though. Oh no, it would be from the British and American Ministries of Magic, and it would surely be a terribly harsh one.

"So," Potter said, swinging his feet up to rest them on the edge of his desk. "The women's latrine has mysteriously grown to several times its normal size, while still appearing to have regulation measurements on the outside." His tone was surprisingly calm and formal, and his face expressionless. "It has also been covered in pink wallpaper and flowers." He paused here to gaze around at the guilty faces. The four children were shielded almost protectively by Hawkeye, Margaret, and Klinger, though Potter could see that their heads were hung shamefully. Radar was standing off to the side, his face white as a sheet, looking for all the world like he was going to be beheaded.

Potter shifted in his chair and folded his hands in his lap. "The men's latrine is currently holding an imprisoned snooty-music composer who's been dead for some-hundred years, at least to my knowledge." Sirius coughed loudly and sidled behind Hawkeye, trying to hide himself further; obviously this had been his handywork. "Not to mention the fact that there are four unauthorized minors in a war zone." He removed his feet from the desk top and set them on the floor, leaning forward to peer sternly at the eight people assembled before him. He dropped the formality. "Well? Whaddaya got to say for yourselves?"

"Colonel," Hawkeye began, completely unsure of how he was going to explain this. "We... um... we really have no excuse. It was just a little joke gone wrong-"

"An accident," Remus piped up from behind Klinger. "It was an accident. We really didn't mean to, sir! We were just having a bit of fun, not trying to scare anyone!"

The noticeable British accent caused a very small smile to tug at one corner of Colonel Potter's mouth. A moment later, a chuckle broke loose. He stared directly at the four scheming students and said, "Your Headmaster'll be furious with you when he finds out 'bout this mess. This is all very dangerous... not to mention illegal!"

"You... you...!" Margaret squeaked, her eyes wide with shock.

"You're a wizard!" Klinger shouted, despite Margaret and Hawkeye's quick shushes. "Holy Toledo!"

"You know about Hogwarts?!" the Marauders chorused, looking terrified.

"Nah, I ain't no wizard," Potter said softly, shrugging. "I'm a squib. But I sure as hell know them British types, and whoever's head o'your school's gonna be mad as a monkey with the mumps!"

"You're not British!" Lily pointed out suddenly, as Colonel Potter's accent grew stronger and stronger. "You're from the American south! How do you know of us? Especially if you're a squib?" she demanded, hands on her hips. Potter's eyes twinkled briefly.

"Not 'til you tell me who you are, little miss."

That's where Hawkeye broke in. "Colonel Potter, uh, sir, meet Lily Evans, James Potter, Sirius Black, and Remus Lupin. They're from Hogwarts." He shifted uncomfortably. "How do you know about- about-"

"Mildred," Potter answered shortly. "Fine witch. She went to Hogwarts for a few years, 'fore her parents moved out to St. Louie." Hawkeye looked ready to faint. It most certainly was shaping up to be an interesting day. "My father, grandfather, and great-grandfather were all wizards, but I just didn't have the stuff in me, I suppose. Who's your Headmaster, kids?"

"D- D- Dippet, but D-Dumbledore's taken over this year," Remus said, swallowing. They were in trouble with a man in a position of extreme authority, who happened to know about the wizarding world and their school. Things could hardly get any worse.

"Dumbledore?" Potter asked, his eyebrows lifted with surprise. "Last I heard o' him, he was still abroad after takin' care of Grindelwald, gettin' ready to accept a position at Hogwarts as the Transfiggy teacher. So he's the Headmaster now, eh?" Remus paled. He knew their teacher, too.

"The dark wizard Grindelwald?" James asked, looking fascinated. "How do you know about him?" Colonel Potter laughed.

"My wife helped to defeat him, son! Ain't you ever heard o' Mildred Potter?" They shook their heads, but Lily made a mental note to look up the name in the library, when they got back to schoo. She swallowed. If they ever got back to school. The Colonel looked back and forth between Hawkeye, Margaret, Klinger, and Radar. "Now, what's bein' done to make sure these kids get back home?

Margaret swallowed visibly. "Er..."

"Well," Hawkeye said carefully, "you know what apparition is, right?" Potter nodded. "That's good. See, these kids, uh, well they... they apparated here, but they did it illegally, because the four of them are all underage." Potter shot them a stern glance.

"Oh, that's not the worst of it, sir." Radar mumbled, shaking his head vigorously, his little round glasses sliding down the bridge of his nose.

"There's more?"

"Afraid so," Hawkeye said. You see, er... these kids, well, they apparated back in time. On accident. They go to school in Scotland-"

"SHH!" the four of them hissed immediately. Lily shot Hawkeye a scathing look and practically snarled, "Why don't you just tell the whole world where it's at?!"

Hawkeye rolled his eyes. "They go to school in the year 1970."

Silence filled the room.

"Well how in the hell are you going to get them back?!"

"It's... complicated. And dangerous. I'd have to-"

"Attention all personnel, wounded in the compound! All medical shifts report to the pad immediately! ASAP, folks, this chopper's gotta be back to Tokyo 'fore dark! Attention all personnel, attention all personnel! We got wounded!"

(A/N: Ha, great place to leave off, wouldn't you say? ;) Anyway, in my story, Colonel Potter is in no way related to James. Period. In other news, NaNoWriMo is now over, so I can dedicate all my writing time to finishing up the poor, innocent little ficlets I abandoned oh-so-long ago... thanks to all my reviewers! Hee!)