Leave a message at the beep....ff7 style By Scitzo and Psyco
Disclaimer: Scitzo- I don't own anything FF7 (falls on knees and prays for evil ninja lawyers to go away.)
Sephiroth
You have reached the ultimate godliness that is Sephiroth. If I have not killed you yet leave a message and I will do so shortly. (BEEP)
5 new Messages
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Yah I'd like a large pepperoni pizza with extra cheese. This is the number for Dominos right? You guys should think about changing your greeting. It could scare off your customers.
Vincent
You have reached Vincent's coffin. I am sleeping at the moment call back in 30 years. (BEEP)
1 new message
Okay this time I know I have reached Dominos. I'm not waiting 30 years for my pizza. You guys can't be that busy.
Cloud
Hello! Hello! Is this thing on? You have reached Cloud. I am mourning the loss of my beloved Aeris. If you are Aeris leave a message if not don't bother.
1 new message
(Sephiroth in high girly voice) Cloud its Aeris. It is cold at the bottom of this lake and.....
- Cloud picks up phone-
Hello Aeris I'm sorry it's cold-
(Sephiroth in normal voice) Hah hah hah
you fool!
that is the 10th time this week you fell for my message.
HAH HAH HAH.
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Rufus
You have reached the office of Rufus. I'm off on "official" business. Leave me a message and it will go through 20 people before it gets to me.
(BEEP)
2 new messages
This is Fat Boy's Chocolate Company I'm calling to confirm an order for 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 chocolate bars for a Rufus Shinra.
Rufus this is your mother speaking. Now I know that your teenage hormones are "acting" up. All those years of finishing school gone to waste. All the lectures and health classes should have done something. But I hold in my hand a list of the women you've "spent" quality time with...
Samantha
Hollie
Amy
Heather
Aimee
Jamie
Ami
Kayln
Brittney
Paige
Brittany
Holly
Brittney
Jessica
Britnee
Yuffie
Vanessa
Brenda
Amanda
Brianna
Your aunt Sheryl
Your cousin Alice
Your sister Beth
Her sister Annie
Rachel
Tiffany
Elena
Jennifer
Scarlet
Mary
Emily
Kim
Sarah
Kathy
Sara
Kjar
Shari
Kris
Tifa
Kaimi
Your other aunt Melissa
And your Grandmother
You ungrateful, selfish little son of a.... (Answering machine runs out of tape)
Barret
You have reached Barret Wallace. If you're an Avalanche member leave a message. If your Shinra #%& yourself and go to hell.
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Hojo
You have reached the laboratory of the all mighty Hojo. If you would like to be a test specimen leave a message at the beep. (BEEP)
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Look all I want is my pizza
A/N: Review I beg of thee.