Disclaimer: I do not own The Gilmore Girls or any of the characters.

A/N: This is my first fan fiction ever so bear with me please. I have never attempted to write anything else.

As she sat on her front lawn sobbing she thought about what she was going to do after this point. For the first time in Rory Gilmore's organized life she had no idea what she was going to do. She had just slept with a man for the first time in her life. What would happen tomorrow or the day after that? Would her mother ever talk to her again? Would Dean really end up with her instead of his wife? Dean has a wife.

As that thought finally sunk in Rory realized that she had made the biggest mistake of her life. In a moment of passion and confusion she had slept with a married man. The only thing she could do right now was cry even harder.

Her mother was extremely disappointed in her and she would be responsible if a marriage fell apart. For the first time in her life she had told her mother that she hated her. She had never spoken to her mother that way, not even as a pre-teen when hormones started to change and she started to become a person of her own.

The past few hours got her thinking. First it was her relationship with her mother and then it was her relationship with Dean. It's at that exact moment that she was flooded with memories – good and bad – of all of her past relationships.

First it was Dean. The sweet and gentle first ever love of her life. Dean was her first boyfriend, her first kiss and her first ever heartbreak. When their relationship had first started, she had been shy and awkward. She didn't know how to act around guys. Dean had been her best friend, he had defended her and protected her when Tristan had gotten too close. He had been in love with her and she couldn't even tell him that she felt the same way because in her heart she knew that she didn't really love him at the time, he was just comfortable he was what she was used to. That had been the reason for her first heartbreak. Dean's and her's first break up.

Soon after, there had been the kiss with Tristan. That guy had been such a great kisser. Sure she was attracted to him...He intrigued her. The way he always annoyed her. She realized as she sat out there on the grass, on this should have been perfect night, when she should have been thinking of Dean and what had just happened between them, that Tristan probably had a crush on her back at Chilton. How much he must have been hurt when only a week after their first kiss she had told him that she hated him and then left to be with Dean again. Later on Tristan had vanished from her life to go to Military School.

Her relationship with Dean wasn't meant to last the second time around either especially after Jess had showed up in Stars Hollow. Their attraction to each other was obvious to everyone, and then she had kissed him, while still with Dean. Needless to say she and Dean didn't stay together much longer.

Jess had just hurt her so badly. She had actually loved him but he just left her. Her feelings for him were strong. Maybe she would have went with him to New York when he'd asked if she hadn't had thoughts of Dean in her head.

She was wondering if maybe she should have followed Jess. Maybe she'd be happier than she was at this moment. Her mother wouldn't be all pissed off at her and she never would have slept with Dean if she wouldn't have been in town. How could her once so simple life, get so messed up and so confusing in just one night. How many mistakes could she make in a lifetime? She needed someone to talk to and that certainly wasn't her mother so she decided to seek Lane's advice.

"Lane please be home" Rory thought to herself as she got to Lane's door.

Just as she was about to knock the door opened and Ms Kim walked out. "Hello Ms. Kim, is Lane here?" "Oh, hello Rory. Yes Lane is in there. I was just going back home. Goodnight!"

"Lane! Lane! Hello!" Rory said as she walked into the apartment.

As she set eyes on Lane the tears started to pour.

"Ror what's going on?" Lane asked her with concern on her face.

Between sobs Rory spilled every single little detail to her best friend. After all they'd known each other forever and if there was anyone she could talk to it was Lane. Or could she?

"What did you just say? I'm not sure I heard you correctly. Did you just say that you and Dean...?"

:"Yes I did, you heard right."

"But Ror, Dean's married."

"I know but at that exact moment it didn't seem to matter. Then my mom came home and just couldn't help but remind me."

"So what happens now? I mean does he stay with Lindsey? Do they break up? Does he move out? Are you two getting back together? What's going to happen Ror?"

Rory sighs and the tears start to flow once again.

"I just don't know. I don't wanna be responsible for a marriage falling apart. Maybe this was a mistake. What the hell will I do once the town finds out? Oh my God I'll be known as a home wrecker!!"

"Ror calm down we'll figure this out. I'll help you."

They sat in silence for a while just trying to think of what was going to happen. Suddenly Rory's face lit up.

"Lane, I know what I've gotta do. I'll see you later. I gotta go, thanks for the ears."

And with that she was out the door and running home.

--

When she got home it was dark. Lorelei must have gone back to the inn. Rory got a pen and paper and started to write.

--

Dear mom,

I'm sorry for what I said tonight. I don't hate you and never would be able to hate you. After everything that's happened tonight I just realized that I can't stay here all summer. Being around Dean and Lindsey isn't a good idea and facing this town once things are revealed won't be good for any of us.
I've decided to leave town for a while. I'll call you to let you know that I'm ok. Don't worry about me I'll be ok.

Love,

Rory

-- -- She put it in an envelope and left it on her mom's pillow.

She packed a bag with everything she needed, clothes, toothbrush, a book and a few things to eat got in her car and drove off.

A/N: Ok that's all for the first chapter. Where do you think she'll go? Please let me know what you think... but please don't be too harsh.