One-shot fic of Felldoh's thoughts as he battles Badrang. Animorph fans may recognize Felldoh's last thoughts from book 54, but I had to add that in, seeing how it fit so well. This is my first try at writing one shot angst, and if it is good, I may write more in the future. R and R please.


"Your days of tyranny are over, scum!" Felldoh shouted, as he battled with Badrang. The tip of his javelin flickered in and out, almost tauntingly, lightly.

"You can't beat me, squirrel," Badrang panted. "Save your own life . Serve me once more and I will spare you."

Felldoh's blood boiled. "Never!" he shouted, lunging at Badrang. "Never will I serve a tyrant such as yourself." I prefer death, he thought.

Badrang began to wish he had never agreed to fight this creature. Kicking sand into his opponent's eyes, he turned and fled, back to the safety of his fortress. Just a bit further, and he would be safe, behind his walls and...

WHAM! Suddenly, the tyrant found himself on the ground, blows raining heavily down on him mercilessly. A scream rose in his throat as he tried to curl up, shielding his body from the searing pain of the beatings.

Felldoh, filled with bloodwrath and satisfaction, continue to beat him with the rod of his javelin, endlessly, laughing. This is it, he thought exuberantly, exhilaration flooding his veins. The tyrant of Marshank, helpless, before him. Badrang, receiving a taste of his own medicine.

"Please...stop," Badrang whispered pitifully, trying to roll away from the vengeful slave. His body burned with agony, every stroke increasing the pain tricefold.

Felldoh laughed, feeling no pity for the now-helpless ruler of Marshank. "What's the matter, mighty one," he crowed, mockingly. "You beat my father because he was old and slow." And you forced me to watch, helpless to do anything, he though regretfully. "You beat me when I was no more than a babe," he yelled angrily, his blows coming down even harder as they began to draw blood.

flashback

Felldoh tripped, sending bricks flying everywhere. It was an accident, the load far to heavy for a young creature as himself. As fate would have it, one missile struck Badrang on the side.

Immediately, the tyrant was at his side, beating him cruelly with the flat of his sword, the sword that rightfully belonged to Martin. Blows rained down on Felldoh, but he refused to cry out, despite the stinging pain.

"You WORTHLESS creature," Badrang screamed madly, viciously kicking out at the young squirrel. "How dare you attack me. You are pathetic, useless, weak..." the insults went on and on as Badrang continued lashing the young squirrel.

Blood began seeping out, staining Felldoh's tunic. Bile and nausea rose in his mouth, but still, he did not cry out.

"Majesty, please," Barkjon cried, grabbing Badrang's arm. "My son is young, he did not mean to..."

Badrang backhanded the old squirrel, knocking him to the ground.

Hot anger replaced Felldoh's pain, at Badrang's treatment of his father. From that day, Felldoh swore he would repay Badrang the pain he had caused....somehow...

end flashback

You deserve every bit of this pain, he thought, remembering. You are the one who is worthless, weak, pathetic. So lost was Felldoh in the rage of battle, that he did not notice Badrang crying out a single word over and over again...until an arrow jutted out of his shoulder.

Out of nowhere, Felldoh was surrounded by archers, vermin, dragging him to the ground. Over the roar of the vermin, he heard Badrang, dimly, laughing triumphantly as the tyrant ran for the safety of his fortress, escaping from the battle.

No! Felldoh thought vainly, despairingly, as another arrow found it's way into his side. Badrang, you lying scum, you coward. It was too late to catch Badrang; Felldoh turned his efforts to the vermin surrounding him. Hurling a javelin, he impaled one rat, as many more rose to take its place.

Felldoh threw himself into the melee, laughing madly. Breaking his javelin over the head of a rat, the creature fell to the bloody sand, never to rise again. "Fur and Freedom" he roared, fighting wildly, ignoring the agony inflicted on him by the dozens of vermin. "Fur and Freedom!"

Blood filled his mouth, as his vision began to grow hazy. This is the end, he thought, blankly, sinking wearily to the sand among the corpses of dead vermin. I'm going to die. The vermin were gone, either back inside Marshank, or brought down by Felldoh. He was alone, surrounded by corpses, in the bloody sand. Dying.

Numbness replaced the burning pain, Felldoh raised his head, and saw the streaks of dawn, red as blood, highlighting the dark sky. It was dawn, strange to think it would be the last sunrise he'd ever see.

To his surprise, he felt no regret, no desperate denial, no sadness at this fact. A calm smile spread across the face of the fallen warrior. He thought of his father, Barkjon, Brome, the players, and silently wished them well in the continuing fight for freedom. A thought rose, unbidden, in his mind. Martin, wherever he was, would finish what Felldoh started. "Martin," Felldoh whispered, quietly, "Don't let this have been in vain. Kill Badrang and take back your father's sword...I know you will."

That final thought gave Felldoh more peace and satisfaction than he had ever felt. As his vision began to go dark, he bid all his friends a silent farewell. Looking up at the sky for the last time, Felldoh wondered. Did I make a difference, he asked silently, did my life...and my death...did it matter? Felldoh heard the answer in his mind, clearly, as the gates of the Dark Forest loomed before him.

Yes, the voice whispered, you were good. You were strong. You mattered.

"Thank you," he whispered, almost silently, and, with a smile on his face, the warrior let his soul go to eternal rest.