AN: Hi! For those of you who don't know about Fanfic Lists, these are little lists of things that people make, like "You know you watch too much Simpsons when...". This is similar! This is "Lessons Learned from the Mediator". If you like this, be sure to check out my other list here published, called "Things You'll Never Hear on the Mediator".

Lessons Learned from the Mediator

~Californians love to surf in January! (As a 16-year-Californian (and 6 month Alaskan) can I just say, NOT!)

~ Make sure that cute boy at the hotel isn't harboring powers to see the dead before you go out with him. Chances are, he's gonna try to exorcise your boyfriend.

~ Dead people make great boyfriends.

~Always ask the sales lady if your new slides are stain resistant, and if so, is she sure that works for bloodstains?

~I promise you, if you think your boyfriend's ex is bad...

~You can get all your bones broken, your feet blistered to hell, black eyes, trick knees, spit up blood, become concussed, and have your stalker thrown through the door to the backyard. Don't worry, your mom won't ask a single question

~Always be on time for dinner.

~ Voodoo Exorcisms can be fun! You can do them in the safety of your own home.

~Catholic ones are complex. Don't tell the priest your performing one, he'll only try to get in your way.

~Dead people are often more mentally stable than the living. (However, if you talk to dead people, we can't guarantee that you yourself are mentally stable)

~Fear anything that drives a BMW.

~You're boyfriend will totally melee the guy who says you slept with him-- but fear not! He shall not for one second be angry with you.

~No matter how bad you think cheerleaders are, they're worse when dead.

~Take Spanish, not French.

And most importantly!!! ~Don't fear ghosts. Glomp them!