Teakettle:We personally think this chapter is solid gold. The only thing it might need is: more cowbell. If you have a fever, and cowbell is the only perscription, please, let us know. We will do our best to include yet more cowbell. In this chapter. Thanks goes out to James8bitstar for that superflous, but awesome, ending sentence. We LOVE pissing you off.
Royal Venus- Thanks for reading, and good luck with your fic!Sailor Venus- eugh, we're so sick of this stupid bugger and cursing the NC-17 ban. We tried to fix that. Thanks for letting us know it was AWOL, and we'll be posting it over on Adult FFN presently.
Numbuh 3.14: Once again, thanks for reviewing AND seeing the wisedom of not forcing Two to live celebate forever. We salute you. You're so complimentary! Thanks!
Ice Puppet: Happy to have pleased! Thanks for reading!
scone:anyways, this is the final chapter of ish. yes, dear readers, i'm afraid so. but we just felt this was a good place to end it. you all should totally watch out for a sequel, however, in which there is drama! action! romance! (read, sex). we're also all about the remastering, re-releasing and slapping a "special edition" on this sucker, so watch out for that too.
props go out to everyone who has ever read this, to the kids out there on the fighting lines of 1/4 fic-riccery (you all know who you are, and you go!), and all our awesome reviewers. many of you have been mentioned by name, some of you haven't, but i'm really just too lazy to figure out who/when/what was said and respond to all of you. but we love you anyways. Anyways, enjoy.
Fresh Itenerary Nicely Astonishes Lads/Lasses
At 7:13 AM, Numbuh Two closed the front door behind him. He stuck his fingers through the blinds, parting them a bit so he could watch Annie's little blue mini make its way down the street. He gave a small, content sigh, turning around to face Five. His expression was dazed. For what must have been the seventh time, he asked, "Isn't Annie cool? Isn't she the cutest? I bet Annie--"
"Shut the fuck up." Abby commanded, exhausted. "She likes you. You like her. Five is very happy for you both. But she'll be dammed if she listens to one more word about your linux-coding princess." Abby's high had finally crashed like a Boeing 747 into the cold hard ground, leaving her cranky, tired, and woefully unamused. It wasn't that she hadn't had fun – pot and cool people could make any gathering worth her time – but it had been a long night, and her car was still sizzling and smoking somewhere out there in the desert, beyond all hope of repair. She only hoped that One and Four had made good use of her diversion. Quietly, she tiptoed around the corner, scanning the living room. Not even a clothing trail desecrated Nigel's cleaning-roster enforced neatness. She waved Hoagie in behind her. "It's all clear."
"What's all clear?" Though dazed from the blinding shine of lovelight in his eyes, Two was not stupid. He recognized that infiltrating their own living room was somewhat odd.
The ever perky Kuki, however, launched herself onto the long L-shaped couch. She was ennervated from upwards of four hours of playing hard-pad DDR at the party. She had engaged in glorious battle against wothy foes on the Manic setting and emerged triumphant. The primal screams of defeat and conquest had rung throughout the appartment, combining with the tinkling of the J-pop in an epic ballad of victory. It had all been very Beowulf. The warrior, still stinking of battle, coated in the died sweat of her mighty effort, soda and snack foods staining her green camisole like so much spilt blood, needed her richly deserved rest. And she took it there, on a couch that only hours before, unbenownst to her, had been the scene of lusty schenanigans. The warrior opened her mouth, which still vibrated with the aforementioned primal screams, and uttered unto her companions, "God guys, I'm so tired. Can we have pancakes? What happened to my daisy chain?" And the world moved.
Kuki's head suddenly dropped into the pillows, snoring a mighty snore. Two arched his eyebrow.
"So what's up with your covert-ops attitude? Is something wrong?" Five was creeping along towards One's bedroom, betting on the boys having utilized the actual bed rather than rutted in a boxing ring if everything had gone according to her plans. She was also figuring out how to make them pay her for the inevitable damages inflicted on her Under the Bed Stash. Four never could use anything without breaking it. She was sure at least one of her good vibrators was as badly trashed as this year's three blenders, two toasters, and the microwave he'd assualted because it wouldn't melt cheese fast enough. Four's entire allowance was funneled into wall and appliance repair for all the damage he did on the tree house in absent-minded fits or rage.
Five had opened the door to Nigel's room and left it open. Hoagie hovered in the threshhold. Abby was wondering exactly where the happy couple were, and how best to get Hoagie to wait in here while she gently went in and warned them that the gang was indeed all here. Her considerate calculations became totally useless when Nigel, clad only in a towl, sauntered out of the bathroom and into his bedroom. "Wally, darling, did you see what happened to my shorts last ngiht?" He was immediatley answered by a muffled, "By the bureau, luv," which counded suspiciously as if it had come from under the covers.
Five coughed pointedly, and with stunning reflexes Nigel whirled while keeping his towl firmly clamped around his waist. Two's jaw dropped. After a moment of silence, Four sat up. "Arent you going to come get them?" Nigel's horrified profile had him jumping out of bed. "What is it?" Wally panicked, his lithe, athletic, and above all totally nude form bouncing energetically within visibility of the door frame. "Oh, it's just Ab- awe, mother fucking shit." He concluded succinctly. "Mornin' Hoagie."
Four's expression was an odd mixture of embarassed, scared, absurdly proud and just-fucked out of it. He was beet red, but coiuldn't resist a bit of a leer. "And a lovely morning it is, too."
One, on the other had, was more exclusive in his expression. He was very, very worried. Hoagie looked so shocked as to be incapable of speach. "Abigail," Nigel began, voice soft and coaxing.
Five's lips trembled - One feared with hurt or rage, or - she burst out laughing. Her giggles filled the treehousde, and without warning Two joined her. The two clutched each other in laughter even as Four clutched a sheet with which to hide his bits. 'Adonis-like' or not, this was fucking embarassing. When Abby's gale-force laughter had finally subsided, One just rolled his eyes. "I take it you're not mad, disgusted, or even all that surprised?"
"Hell no, who do you think got the team out of your non-existant hair for the night? Five knew before you did, boy. She just thinks it's funny." Her expression softened. "Relax. You my boy. Abby gonna be there for you till you dead. Even if you kill somebody. Especially if it's somebody Abby don't like. That's 'cause we cool. You don't ever have to worry. Unless you broke multiple items from my stash and ain't plannin on reimbursin me. Then, you have to worry." She gave him a quick, tight hug. "You the best boss in the world."
Hoagie couldn't hold it in. "I'm sure we all love working under you- some of us more than others!" Two and Five errupted in another giggle fit with the boys blushed harder.
"You cool too, Mr. Hillarious?" Four muttered with an embarassed irritation.
"Heck yeah. Since Jeannie moved in with my mom, I've gotten about as non-homophobic as it's possible to be. I mean, sure I was wierded out as first, but if you two can make each other as happy as Jeanie and my mom, I'm the first one to grab a six pack, make a toast, and say," and it was clear he'd been working up to this, "bottoms up!" Again Two and Five degerated into quivering piles of snickering.
"I mean," Two gasped, "I've always found your friendship to be very tight!"
"Yeah," Five snorted, "you have been known to share some very private experiences!"
They high-fived spontaneously.
"And," Two rejoindered, "When it comes to One, Four would never borrow anything without ass-king!"
"That was just stupid," Five admonished him. "All I know is, there's more than Count Spankula in this room that enjoys the application of hand to firm-!"
Four, who had initially looked relieved, began to increasingly adopt a homicidal cast. "Why I oughta-"
One began to deftly head off conflict. "Great, team unity is once again restored, blah blah, anyone for pancakes?" He carefully modulated his volume to reach into the living room, where he could just see a few strands of Kuki's black hair falling over the side of the couch.
"Pancakes?" Came the bellow of The DDR Warrior from the next room as she sat straight upright, forgetting all REM cycles in persuit of pancakey pleasure. "Can I drive?!"
"No!" Shouted Two and Five, racing Three to the controls of Two's hoverbus at top speed. Two's planitive, begging whine of "Nonononononopleasegodno! My baby!" could be heard in ever decreasing volume as they rounded the corner to the garage.
When Four had lept out of bed to see what was the matter, he had placed himself, a bit defensivley, in front of One in the doorway. One leaned in and kissed the back of his neck, mumbling against it. "Shouldn't we get dressed now?"
Four leaned back a smirked. "Yeah."
Other, more interesting propositions has started to drift through One's mind. "Must we?"
"'Fraid so." Four said sympathetically, reaching around a hand to quickly goose One's pert cheek- and not the one currently graced with a blush. "Carbs, though, such as are in pancakes? Excelent for boosting energy. I always carboload before a wrestling match." He wiggled a bit to enunciate the double-entendere of 'wrestling'. "And I wouldn't want all these carbs to go to waste, would I?"
Nigel neatly stepped out of his hold. "Get dressed or we'll never make it to breakfast, you oversexed little-"
"That sounds promising." Wally smirked. "Do go on!" He laughed as his clothes hit him firmly in the chest.
"Go. Change. Now."
"Alright, alright. But don't think I don't know your briefs are riding a little tighter-"
"NOW!"
And within a reasonable amount of time, the TND of Sector Five munched gleefully at their local IHOP. And when a dribble of bright amber syrup glisted, sitcky and full on Wally's plump lower lip, One was none too discreet about licking it off.
end