Disclaimer: I don't own Evangelion that would be way to much work.
Authors Notes: I came up for this idea while at work one day, and I thought that this would be really funny story. Well here it is. { Things here in the brackets are replies over the com link. }
Chapter One: Unforeseen Effects
Deep with in NERV headquarters, three teen sit in with in their Eva's doing one of their many sync tests.
"This is stupid!" a red head yelled over her com link. "How much longer do I need to do this?"
{Just another couple of seconds and that will be it for now.} Dr. Akagi's replied. Sounding just a little tired her self.
Well the truth is that this sync test was a six hours long.
{Okay that should do it. Go ahead and shut down.}
Some ten minutes later, Asuka and Rei stand in the woman's locker room washing the LCL out of their hair. Reaching for the shampoo, Asuka had a fleeting thought cross her mind.
'For some reason I kind of wish that Baka Shinji was in here with me.......' Asuka thought, but little did she know she had said it out loud. Loud enough so even Rei could hear it over the shower.
"As do I....." Rei said agreeing with her fellow pilot.
What Rei had said took a moment to sink in Asuka's head. As she took the shampoo and scrubbed the soap in to her thick red hair. Then with soap still in her hair, she looked over to Rei in the next shower stall with a confused look.
"What did you just say, Wonder girl?" Asuka asked.
"I said 'As do I.'" Rei replied like was noting as she rinsed the shampoo out of her hair for the third time.
Standing there blankly looking at Rei, Asuka shook her head. "Then what did I say?"
Rubbing the soap tainted water out from her eyes, Rei looked over at Asuka. "You had wished that Ikari-kun was here. Then I said. As do I. to agree with you."
Then with that, Rei shut off the water and started to dry her self off, leaving Asuka vary confused.
After drying her self off, Asuka joined Shinji in the elevator. Watching the level counter, count off the levels as they traveled to the surface. Glancing over at Shinji another thought came across her mind.
'After thinking about it He has a cute butt.......' Asuka thought, this time knowing she had thought to her self. Then again her thoughts clicked with her. 'What the hell am I thinking?' She mentally screamed.
"I can't take it!!!" She screamed, making Shinji jump.
"Asuka? Umm.... Are you okay?" Shinji asked, not having any clue what was going on.
"You..... I don't know how, but you are to blame for this." Asuka said pointing her index finger at Shinji.
Hearing the 'beeing' sound from the elevator, Asuka forced the doors open and stormed out of the elevator. Leaving Shinji confused.
Some where else in Tokyo-3, Rei walked through the streets making her way back to her apartment. As she waited for the traffic to stop so she can cross the street she had a thought about Shinji.
'Why am I having these thoughts about Ikari-kun? To me he is another Evangelion pilot. But are these thoughts of him lust? What is lust?' Rei thought about this for a moment. 'Lust (lust) n. [OE., pleasure] 1. Bodily appetite; esp., excessive sexual desire. 2. Overmastering desire.' Rei thought, and then she shook her head as she started to cross the street.
"I may just be tired. That is it. Nothing more......" Rei said to her self.
Later that evening, Asuka had locked her self away in her room. Trying every thing she could think of to force the thoughts of Shinji Ikari out of her head. She flipped through a photo album of her and Kaji before she came to Japan. There were photos of them at the beach, out shopping and just doing all sorts of everyday activities. After flipping through the album for her fifth time, she let out a sigh.
"It not working." She said to her self as she closed the album. "I still cant get Shinji out of my head. Maybe I'm going crazy, yeah that's it. So I'll just stay here in my room and avoid him and in the morning everything will be alright. And besides Misato is here so it's not like I'm going to act on these feelings." She said out loud. Then after thinking about what she had said. She shook her head. "No! Thoughts! NOT FEELINGS!"
Just then....... "Asuka! Shinji! You two are on your own tonight! I'm going out with Kaji!" Misato yelled, fallowed by the door slamming shut.
There in Asuka's room, she sat there on her bed knees hugged tight against her chest. "Not good, not good....... Okay Asuka just stay here in your room and wait out the night. Yeah that's the plane."
In the kitchen, Shinji had just finished with making dinner. "Asuka! Dinner is ready!" He called out.
"Leave me alone stupid!" Asuka yelled back from her room, making Shinji cringe a little.
"Fine, I'll put yours in the fridge!" Shinji yelled back.
After sitting down at the couch, Shinji watched some TV as he had his dinner.
'Man... Asuka is acting more.... More... more, well more bitchy then normal. I'm not saying she is one, no...... Oh well maybe it's her time of the month or something......' With that thought, Shinji looked over at Pen-Pen. "Is that right Pen-Pen?" He asked.
"WARK!!"
"You said it...." Shinji said as he went back to his dinner.
As the night went on and Shinji had gone to his room to go to bed, all while Asuka was going out of her mind. She then finally gave in to the 'drive' to find Shinji. Getting up off her bed, she quietly walked out of her room and stepped across to Shinji's room. Sliding his door open, Asuka looked in side to find Shinji sleeping soundly with his ear buds to his SDAT player stuffed in to his ears. Tip toeing over to Shinji's bed, Asuka clinched her teeth.
'Why am I doing this? For some reason I really want Baka Shinji...... I just can't.......' With that, she removed one of the ear buds from Shinji's ear and whispered in to his ear.
"Shinji....." she whispered. But only got a sleepy moan in reply.
"Shinji." She said a bit louder, this time waking him.
"A... Asuka?" Shinji said half a sleep. "What do you want?" he went on to ask as he sat up some.
"I won't you...." She said in a tone that Shinji didn't catch or was just too tired to even care to hear the seductive tone.
"You won't what?" Shinji asked then he looked over at the burning red light from his alarm clock. "Asuka it's like two in the morning........Ugh....."
With that, Shinji slid back under his covers and pulled his blankets up over his head. Then before he knew it, he felt two slender arms wrap around him and a set of hands rubbing his chest.....
'Oh it's only Asuka......' "Asuka!" Shinji yelled. As he jumped out of bed.
"Shinji, please I want you. I want you to take me here, here and how." Asuka seductively said as she approached him.
"You've lost it." Shinji said as he cowered tours the door.
"Oh no. I want you......."
As this was taking place, Misato stumbled in to the apartment still plastered. Bracing her self up against the wall as she slid to the floor, she giggled drunkenly. Suddenly Shinji ran out from his room.
"Misato! Asuka is trying to rap me!" He screamed. Then he just remembered who he was yelling for help to.
Misato giggled again. "Did I interrupt something?"
"Misato, don't worry I'm just going to ravage Baka Shinji here." Asuka said. As she started to grab at the Shinji and start taking him back to her room.
Well after several hours of fighting the red head back, Shinji was finally able to find some form of refuge in the bathroom. All while Asuka slept up against the door out in the hallway.
Then next day at school Shinji sat at his desk, his eyes heavy from the lack of sleep from the night before. Having slept in the bath tub also gave Shinji a sour neck. When Toji walked in the class room, the first thing he saw was Shinji sitting there looking like hell.
"Shinji man what happened? You look like total hell." Toji asked then he noticed Asuka sitting right behind Shinji, with her chin resting on Shinji's shoulder.
"Never mind that, why is Asuka sitting right behind you like that? Better yet.... Get out of my seat Devil woman!"
"Piss off!" She yelled back. "Baka Shinji and I are having a moment."
Just then Kensuke walked in. and noticed Shinji, Asuka and Toji.
"What's up?" Kensuke asked.
"Shinji looks like hell and the devil here seems to have lost it." Toji replied just about summing it up.
"You think that's weird, look over at Ayanami." Kensuke said pointing over at the blue haired girl at the far end of the class room.
Toji, Kensuke and Shinji looked over at Rei, who was reading a book quietly at her desk.
Toji only shrugged his shoulders. "Yeah so. She's reading a book, big deal."
Kensuke pushed his glasses up his nose. "It's not that she's reading a book, it's the book that she's reading."
Getting up, Shinji started to walk to Rei's desk.
"Shinji? Why are you leaving me!?" Asuka whined. Letting out a low moan, Shinji stopped in front of Rei's desk and put on a smile.
"Hi Ayanami? .........What are you reading?" Shinji asked. Sure simple question should get a simple reply. Right? Wrong......
Rei looked up seductively and closed the book so the title could be seen by Shinji, making him sweat.
"It's the Kama Sutra Ikari-kun......" She replied. "You know what it's about?" she asked.
"I.... I umm know of it........" Shinji replied as he laughed nervously.
"It is a book of sexual possessions to increase the level of eroticism between the two lovers......." Rei went on to say.
"That's great.......... Okay... Yeah......" Shinji stood there at a loss for words. 'Okay this is strange......' He thought to him self.
Then she opened the book back up to a spot that had been booked marked up. "I would really like to try this one........" She paused for a moment. "With you Ikari-kun....." she said in a low voice.
If words could kill, Shinji would have been a dead man, there on the floor of the class room. He could almost see the news paper. Shinji Ikari was killed by the arousing words of one Rei Ayanami. As she made sexual advances tourds him yesterday as he stood in front of her in their class room. Young Shinji Ikari was the pilot of the robot known as Evangelion unit 01. He will be missed by his coworkers and class mates alike.
But Shinji's daze was broken by Toji as he snapped his fingers in front of him face, and the squobering between two girls. When Shinji noticed who the two girls were he just stood there amazed.
"You better not lay a hand on my Baka-Shinji. You hear me Wonder girl?" Asuka yelled, making everybody in the room look at her.
"Ikari-kun will be with me. And you will not stand in my way." Rei calmly replied. Making everybody in the class room look over at Rei.
"Oh yeah?!" Asuka shouted.
"Yes. Oh yes, Ikari-kun and I will do every thing in this book." Rei said pointing at her book on her desk.
"Well, The Baka and I don't need a book to do that." Asuka said grinning.
As this went on between Asuka and Rei, Shinji, Toji and Kensuke stood there. There was something that none of them would have never thought would happen, even if hell froze over.
"Shinji, can I ask you something?" Toji asked.
Shinji let out a sigh. "Sure. What is it?"
"When did the Devil start liking you? Or should I ask when did she start wanting to jump your bones?" Toji asked.
Before Shinji could answer the question Kensuke ask a question him self. "And when did Ayanami start getting in to the kinky stuff too?" He asked.
"Three words. I. Don't. Know." Shinji said answering both his friends' questions.
***
As the day went on, Shinji sat there at his desk watching the number of unread messages increase from Asuka and Rei. Letting out a heavy sigh, he closed the computer; shutting it off.
'What's gotten in to the both of them? One moment Asuka hates my guts and Rei...... Well Rei is Rei. Now their as Toji puts it wants to jump my bones......' Shinji thought to him self, just as the bell rung letting the class know that it was lunch time. And soon enough there was a shadow looming over him and his desk.
"Shiiiiinjiiiiiiii....." a voice said as sweetly as the source of the voice could.
Looking up to where the voice was coming from, Shinji had a bad feeling about this. It was Asuka..... Asuka smiling. "Y-Yes, Asuka?" Shinji replied carefully.
"Did you know that you forgot our lunch this morning?" She asked.
Fearing the worst, Shinji prepared himself for a good hard wak on the head, or even a good loud 'Jerk', but what ever it was going to be. Just let it be swift.....
"It's okay......." She went on to say. "I'll get us some lunch so we can share it, and maybe some fun........." then with a giggle, she gave Shinji a quick kiss on the lips and ran off to the lunch room.
Leaving Shinji and the whole class confused. Just as Asuka had left, Rei had approached. "Ikari-kun I will get you some lunch as well....." She said.
"But... that's really....." Shinji was cut off by Rei's finger being placed on his lips. "Shhhh, you will need your energy for when you use my book later on....." then with that, Rei had walked out of the class room. Leaving the whole class even more confused. Toji slowly came up to his friend.
"Umm Shinji is there something you want to tell everyone?" He asked.
"No there's nothing going on!" Shinji yelled. "As you can tell something is not right with both of them."
He then reached in to his backpack and pulled the cell phone that Masato had given him. "I better call Dr. Akagi." Opening the phone Shinji let out a sigh. There was no single.
"Your phone won't work in here, or any other place except for there." Kensuke said as he pointed out the window, to a roof top at the other end of the school.
Looking at the roof top, Shinji knew that he need to get hold of the doctor or someone at NERV. "Can you two do something for me?" Shinji asked.
"Say no more, we can think of something. You better find out what's wrong with them. Asuka acting nice is really freaking me out." Toji said.
Meanwhile down in the lunch room, Asuka was paying for Shinji's lunch when she saw Rei getting some lunch and it was the same thing that she was getting for Shinji. Wanting to know what was going on, she walked up to Rei.
"So Wonder girl, finally decided to give up eating just veggies?" Asuka asked.
"No." She replied. "This is so Ikari-kun can build up his strength for later on."
"I told you. You're not going to touch my Baka Shinji!"
Just then both girls got the same idea and made a mad dash back to the classroom.
Out at the other end of the school, Shinji stood up on the roof with several other students. Scrolling through the couple phone numbers he had programmed.
"Lets see, Masato, no she's hung over. Kensuke..... Toji...... Here we go, NERV." Pressing send, Shinji waited for someone to answer the phone.
Over at the geo front, deep with in central dogma. Our three favorite tech's sat doing their own things. One sat there reading a magazine, the second sat there half a sleep and the third sat at his desk playing a game. When suddenly the phone started to ring, and ring and ring. Up on his normal seat over looking the control room, Commander Ikari sat there in his normal pose.
"Is someone going to get that?" The commander said looking down to the people on the main floor, then over to the sub-commander, who was reading a rather thick book.
Not having much to do him self, the commander answered the phone. "NERV central dogma, Commander Ikari speaking."
CLICK!
"Who was that?" the sub-commander asked with out looking up from his book.
Looking at the phone, the older Ikari gave a questioning look before hanging up the phone. "Must have been a wrong number."
Back at the school, Shinji hung up the cell phone after hearing his father's voice. "What help is he going to do? Man what am I going to do?"
Just then back in the class room, Asuka and Rei ran in to the room, both out of breath. "Shinji, here you go." Asuka called out.
"Ikari-kun I have your meal." Rei said. But there was no Shinji there in the room, only Toji and Kensuke looking back at them.
"You just missed him, he's on the can." Toji said.
"Hmm.... In the restroom there are many things that can be done." Rei said before turning around.
"Oh no you don't I said I'm having him." Asuka shouted.
Just then another student noticed Shinji up on the roof on a cell phone and he didn't know what was going on with Shinji and his little problems. "Look there's Ikari. I didn't know that he had a cell phone."
Both Asuka and Rei looked out the window then back at Toji.
"On the Can eh?" Asuka asked.
"In deed....." Rei said agreeing with Asuka, and then they thought the same thing and started to run as fast as they could to the roof top.
"Oh man we need to tell him that there coming after him." Toji said in a panic.
"Are you kidding, they're running to fast we're never catch up." Kensuke said, and then he started to think. Looking over at the class rep, he snapped his fingers. "I know."
"I need you make up!" Kensuke ordered.
"What? No way, I'm not giving you that stuff."
"No time." He said as he picked up her bag from beside her desk and started to dig through it.
"Come on man, they're probably almost there." Toji shouted as he looked back out the window.
"Got it!" yelled Kensuke, as he held up a thing of lipstick.
Back on the roof top, Shinji walked back and fourth trying to figure out what to. When he heard the faint yells of someone. Looking over at the direction of the yelling, he could see Toji and Kensuke yelling out the window of the class room, but couldn't make out what they were trying to tell them. Then he watched as Kensuke start writing on the window, Shinji started to read out loud.
"Ikari. Asuka and Rei are on the way to the roof........" after reading. It took a moment for it to click with Shinji. "They're coming..... THEY'RE COMING!!!!"
Just as he realized that, the door to the roof flung open, and there was Rei and Asuka. Both huffing and wheezing from running all the way to the roof.
"You Baka..... (Huff) Why'd you run like that?" Asuka asked as she tried to catch her breath.
"Ikari-knu........." Rei said as she too tried to catch her breath.
Back in the class room everyone watched as someone started to climb over the edge of the roof, and down the spouting.
"Is that Shinji?" Someone asked.
"It looks like........ Is he going to jump?" another student asked.
Toji and Kensuke just watched. "Man, what the hell is Shinji thinking?"
After climbing down the rain spouting, Shinji was able to crawl in through an open window. And started to run to the main floor of the school.
"Man, something's not right with them. I need to get to NERV." Shinji thought to him self.
T.B.C.
Well what you think? Well if you thought that was funny just wait for the next chapter. Please, please review. I like all reviews. Good and bad.
Authors Notes: I came up for this idea while at work one day, and I thought that this would be really funny story. Well here it is. { Things here in the brackets are replies over the com link. }
Chapter One: Unforeseen Effects
Deep with in NERV headquarters, three teen sit in with in their Eva's doing one of their many sync tests.
"This is stupid!" a red head yelled over her com link. "How much longer do I need to do this?"
{Just another couple of seconds and that will be it for now.} Dr. Akagi's replied. Sounding just a little tired her self.
Well the truth is that this sync test was a six hours long.
{Okay that should do it. Go ahead and shut down.}
Some ten minutes later, Asuka and Rei stand in the woman's locker room washing the LCL out of their hair. Reaching for the shampoo, Asuka had a fleeting thought cross her mind.
'For some reason I kind of wish that Baka Shinji was in here with me.......' Asuka thought, but little did she know she had said it out loud. Loud enough so even Rei could hear it over the shower.
"As do I....." Rei said agreeing with her fellow pilot.
What Rei had said took a moment to sink in Asuka's head. As she took the shampoo and scrubbed the soap in to her thick red hair. Then with soap still in her hair, she looked over to Rei in the next shower stall with a confused look.
"What did you just say, Wonder girl?" Asuka asked.
"I said 'As do I.'" Rei replied like was noting as she rinsed the shampoo out of her hair for the third time.
Standing there blankly looking at Rei, Asuka shook her head. "Then what did I say?"
Rubbing the soap tainted water out from her eyes, Rei looked over at Asuka. "You had wished that Ikari-kun was here. Then I said. As do I. to agree with you."
Then with that, Rei shut off the water and started to dry her self off, leaving Asuka vary confused.
After drying her self off, Asuka joined Shinji in the elevator. Watching the level counter, count off the levels as they traveled to the surface. Glancing over at Shinji another thought came across her mind.
'After thinking about it He has a cute butt.......' Asuka thought, this time knowing she had thought to her self. Then again her thoughts clicked with her. 'What the hell am I thinking?' She mentally screamed.
"I can't take it!!!" She screamed, making Shinji jump.
"Asuka? Umm.... Are you okay?" Shinji asked, not having any clue what was going on.
"You..... I don't know how, but you are to blame for this." Asuka said pointing her index finger at Shinji.
Hearing the 'beeing' sound from the elevator, Asuka forced the doors open and stormed out of the elevator. Leaving Shinji confused.
Some where else in Tokyo-3, Rei walked through the streets making her way back to her apartment. As she waited for the traffic to stop so she can cross the street she had a thought about Shinji.
'Why am I having these thoughts about Ikari-kun? To me he is another Evangelion pilot. But are these thoughts of him lust? What is lust?' Rei thought about this for a moment. 'Lust (lust) n. [OE., pleasure] 1. Bodily appetite; esp., excessive sexual desire. 2. Overmastering desire.' Rei thought, and then she shook her head as she started to cross the street.
"I may just be tired. That is it. Nothing more......" Rei said to her self.
Later that evening, Asuka had locked her self away in her room. Trying every thing she could think of to force the thoughts of Shinji Ikari out of her head. She flipped through a photo album of her and Kaji before she came to Japan. There were photos of them at the beach, out shopping and just doing all sorts of everyday activities. After flipping through the album for her fifth time, she let out a sigh.
"It not working." She said to her self as she closed the album. "I still cant get Shinji out of my head. Maybe I'm going crazy, yeah that's it. So I'll just stay here in my room and avoid him and in the morning everything will be alright. And besides Misato is here so it's not like I'm going to act on these feelings." She said out loud. Then after thinking about what she had said. She shook her head. "No! Thoughts! NOT FEELINGS!"
Just then....... "Asuka! Shinji! You two are on your own tonight! I'm going out with Kaji!" Misato yelled, fallowed by the door slamming shut.
There in Asuka's room, she sat there on her bed knees hugged tight against her chest. "Not good, not good....... Okay Asuka just stay here in your room and wait out the night. Yeah that's the plane."
In the kitchen, Shinji had just finished with making dinner. "Asuka! Dinner is ready!" He called out.
"Leave me alone stupid!" Asuka yelled back from her room, making Shinji cringe a little.
"Fine, I'll put yours in the fridge!" Shinji yelled back.
After sitting down at the couch, Shinji watched some TV as he had his dinner.
'Man... Asuka is acting more.... More... more, well more bitchy then normal. I'm not saying she is one, no...... Oh well maybe it's her time of the month or something......' With that thought, Shinji looked over at Pen-Pen. "Is that right Pen-Pen?" He asked.
"WARK!!"
"You said it...." Shinji said as he went back to his dinner.
As the night went on and Shinji had gone to his room to go to bed, all while Asuka was going out of her mind. She then finally gave in to the 'drive' to find Shinji. Getting up off her bed, she quietly walked out of her room and stepped across to Shinji's room. Sliding his door open, Asuka looked in side to find Shinji sleeping soundly with his ear buds to his SDAT player stuffed in to his ears. Tip toeing over to Shinji's bed, Asuka clinched her teeth.
'Why am I doing this? For some reason I really want Baka Shinji...... I just can't.......' With that, she removed one of the ear buds from Shinji's ear and whispered in to his ear.
"Shinji....." she whispered. But only got a sleepy moan in reply.
"Shinji." She said a bit louder, this time waking him.
"A... Asuka?" Shinji said half a sleep. "What do you want?" he went on to ask as he sat up some.
"I won't you...." She said in a tone that Shinji didn't catch or was just too tired to even care to hear the seductive tone.
"You won't what?" Shinji asked then he looked over at the burning red light from his alarm clock. "Asuka it's like two in the morning........Ugh....."
With that, Shinji slid back under his covers and pulled his blankets up over his head. Then before he knew it, he felt two slender arms wrap around him and a set of hands rubbing his chest.....
'Oh it's only Asuka......' "Asuka!" Shinji yelled. As he jumped out of bed.
"Shinji, please I want you. I want you to take me here, here and how." Asuka seductively said as she approached him.
"You've lost it." Shinji said as he cowered tours the door.
"Oh no. I want you......."
As this was taking place, Misato stumbled in to the apartment still plastered. Bracing her self up against the wall as she slid to the floor, she giggled drunkenly. Suddenly Shinji ran out from his room.
"Misato! Asuka is trying to rap me!" He screamed. Then he just remembered who he was yelling for help to.
Misato giggled again. "Did I interrupt something?"
"Misato, don't worry I'm just going to ravage Baka Shinji here." Asuka said. As she started to grab at the Shinji and start taking him back to her room.
Well after several hours of fighting the red head back, Shinji was finally able to find some form of refuge in the bathroom. All while Asuka slept up against the door out in the hallway.
Then next day at school Shinji sat at his desk, his eyes heavy from the lack of sleep from the night before. Having slept in the bath tub also gave Shinji a sour neck. When Toji walked in the class room, the first thing he saw was Shinji sitting there looking like hell.
"Shinji man what happened? You look like total hell." Toji asked then he noticed Asuka sitting right behind Shinji, with her chin resting on Shinji's shoulder.
"Never mind that, why is Asuka sitting right behind you like that? Better yet.... Get out of my seat Devil woman!"
"Piss off!" She yelled back. "Baka Shinji and I are having a moment."
Just then Kensuke walked in. and noticed Shinji, Asuka and Toji.
"What's up?" Kensuke asked.
"Shinji looks like hell and the devil here seems to have lost it." Toji replied just about summing it up.
"You think that's weird, look over at Ayanami." Kensuke said pointing over at the blue haired girl at the far end of the class room.
Toji, Kensuke and Shinji looked over at Rei, who was reading a book quietly at her desk.
Toji only shrugged his shoulders. "Yeah so. She's reading a book, big deal."
Kensuke pushed his glasses up his nose. "It's not that she's reading a book, it's the book that she's reading."
Getting up, Shinji started to walk to Rei's desk.
"Shinji? Why are you leaving me!?" Asuka whined. Letting out a low moan, Shinji stopped in front of Rei's desk and put on a smile.
"Hi Ayanami? .........What are you reading?" Shinji asked. Sure simple question should get a simple reply. Right? Wrong......
Rei looked up seductively and closed the book so the title could be seen by Shinji, making him sweat.
"It's the Kama Sutra Ikari-kun......" She replied. "You know what it's about?" she asked.
"I.... I umm know of it........" Shinji replied as he laughed nervously.
"It is a book of sexual possessions to increase the level of eroticism between the two lovers......." Rei went on to say.
"That's great.......... Okay... Yeah......" Shinji stood there at a loss for words. 'Okay this is strange......' He thought to him self.
Then she opened the book back up to a spot that had been booked marked up. "I would really like to try this one........" She paused for a moment. "With you Ikari-kun....." she said in a low voice.
If words could kill, Shinji would have been a dead man, there on the floor of the class room. He could almost see the news paper. Shinji Ikari was killed by the arousing words of one Rei Ayanami. As she made sexual advances tourds him yesterday as he stood in front of her in their class room. Young Shinji Ikari was the pilot of the robot known as Evangelion unit 01. He will be missed by his coworkers and class mates alike.
But Shinji's daze was broken by Toji as he snapped his fingers in front of him face, and the squobering between two girls. When Shinji noticed who the two girls were he just stood there amazed.
"You better not lay a hand on my Baka-Shinji. You hear me Wonder girl?" Asuka yelled, making everybody in the room look at her.
"Ikari-kun will be with me. And you will not stand in my way." Rei calmly replied. Making everybody in the class room look over at Rei.
"Oh yeah?!" Asuka shouted.
"Yes. Oh yes, Ikari-kun and I will do every thing in this book." Rei said pointing at her book on her desk.
"Well, The Baka and I don't need a book to do that." Asuka said grinning.
As this went on between Asuka and Rei, Shinji, Toji and Kensuke stood there. There was something that none of them would have never thought would happen, even if hell froze over.
"Shinji, can I ask you something?" Toji asked.
Shinji let out a sigh. "Sure. What is it?"
"When did the Devil start liking you? Or should I ask when did she start wanting to jump your bones?" Toji asked.
Before Shinji could answer the question Kensuke ask a question him self. "And when did Ayanami start getting in to the kinky stuff too?" He asked.
"Three words. I. Don't. Know." Shinji said answering both his friends' questions.
***
As the day went on, Shinji sat there at his desk watching the number of unread messages increase from Asuka and Rei. Letting out a heavy sigh, he closed the computer; shutting it off.
'What's gotten in to the both of them? One moment Asuka hates my guts and Rei...... Well Rei is Rei. Now their as Toji puts it wants to jump my bones......' Shinji thought to him self, just as the bell rung letting the class know that it was lunch time. And soon enough there was a shadow looming over him and his desk.
"Shiiiiinjiiiiiiii....." a voice said as sweetly as the source of the voice could.
Looking up to where the voice was coming from, Shinji had a bad feeling about this. It was Asuka..... Asuka smiling. "Y-Yes, Asuka?" Shinji replied carefully.
"Did you know that you forgot our lunch this morning?" She asked.
Fearing the worst, Shinji prepared himself for a good hard wak on the head, or even a good loud 'Jerk', but what ever it was going to be. Just let it be swift.....
"It's okay......." She went on to say. "I'll get us some lunch so we can share it, and maybe some fun........." then with a giggle, she gave Shinji a quick kiss on the lips and ran off to the lunch room.
Leaving Shinji and the whole class confused. Just as Asuka had left, Rei had approached. "Ikari-kun I will get you some lunch as well....." She said.
"But... that's really....." Shinji was cut off by Rei's finger being placed on his lips. "Shhhh, you will need your energy for when you use my book later on....." then with that, Rei had walked out of the class room. Leaving the whole class even more confused. Toji slowly came up to his friend.
"Umm Shinji is there something you want to tell everyone?" He asked.
"No there's nothing going on!" Shinji yelled. "As you can tell something is not right with both of them."
He then reached in to his backpack and pulled the cell phone that Masato had given him. "I better call Dr. Akagi." Opening the phone Shinji let out a sigh. There was no single.
"Your phone won't work in here, or any other place except for there." Kensuke said as he pointed out the window, to a roof top at the other end of the school.
Looking at the roof top, Shinji knew that he need to get hold of the doctor or someone at NERV. "Can you two do something for me?" Shinji asked.
"Say no more, we can think of something. You better find out what's wrong with them. Asuka acting nice is really freaking me out." Toji said.
Meanwhile down in the lunch room, Asuka was paying for Shinji's lunch when she saw Rei getting some lunch and it was the same thing that she was getting for Shinji. Wanting to know what was going on, she walked up to Rei.
"So Wonder girl, finally decided to give up eating just veggies?" Asuka asked.
"No." She replied. "This is so Ikari-kun can build up his strength for later on."
"I told you. You're not going to touch my Baka Shinji!"
Just then both girls got the same idea and made a mad dash back to the classroom.
Out at the other end of the school, Shinji stood up on the roof with several other students. Scrolling through the couple phone numbers he had programmed.
"Lets see, Masato, no she's hung over. Kensuke..... Toji...... Here we go, NERV." Pressing send, Shinji waited for someone to answer the phone.
Over at the geo front, deep with in central dogma. Our three favorite tech's sat doing their own things. One sat there reading a magazine, the second sat there half a sleep and the third sat at his desk playing a game. When suddenly the phone started to ring, and ring and ring. Up on his normal seat over looking the control room, Commander Ikari sat there in his normal pose.
"Is someone going to get that?" The commander said looking down to the people on the main floor, then over to the sub-commander, who was reading a rather thick book.
Not having much to do him self, the commander answered the phone. "NERV central dogma, Commander Ikari speaking."
CLICK!
"Who was that?" the sub-commander asked with out looking up from his book.
Looking at the phone, the older Ikari gave a questioning look before hanging up the phone. "Must have been a wrong number."
Back at the school, Shinji hung up the cell phone after hearing his father's voice. "What help is he going to do? Man what am I going to do?"
Just then back in the class room, Asuka and Rei ran in to the room, both out of breath. "Shinji, here you go." Asuka called out.
"Ikari-kun I have your meal." Rei said. But there was no Shinji there in the room, only Toji and Kensuke looking back at them.
"You just missed him, he's on the can." Toji said.
"Hmm.... In the restroom there are many things that can be done." Rei said before turning around.
"Oh no you don't I said I'm having him." Asuka shouted.
Just then another student noticed Shinji up on the roof on a cell phone and he didn't know what was going on with Shinji and his little problems. "Look there's Ikari. I didn't know that he had a cell phone."
Both Asuka and Rei looked out the window then back at Toji.
"On the Can eh?" Asuka asked.
"In deed....." Rei said agreeing with Asuka, and then they thought the same thing and started to run as fast as they could to the roof top.
"Oh man we need to tell him that there coming after him." Toji said in a panic.
"Are you kidding, they're running to fast we're never catch up." Kensuke said, and then he started to think. Looking over at the class rep, he snapped his fingers. "I know."
"I need you make up!" Kensuke ordered.
"What? No way, I'm not giving you that stuff."
"No time." He said as he picked up her bag from beside her desk and started to dig through it.
"Come on man, they're probably almost there." Toji shouted as he looked back out the window.
"Got it!" yelled Kensuke, as he held up a thing of lipstick.
Back on the roof top, Shinji walked back and fourth trying to figure out what to. When he heard the faint yells of someone. Looking over at the direction of the yelling, he could see Toji and Kensuke yelling out the window of the class room, but couldn't make out what they were trying to tell them. Then he watched as Kensuke start writing on the window, Shinji started to read out loud.
"Ikari. Asuka and Rei are on the way to the roof........" after reading. It took a moment for it to click with Shinji. "They're coming..... THEY'RE COMING!!!!"
Just as he realized that, the door to the roof flung open, and there was Rei and Asuka. Both huffing and wheezing from running all the way to the roof.
"You Baka..... (Huff) Why'd you run like that?" Asuka asked as she tried to catch her breath.
"Ikari-knu........." Rei said as she too tried to catch her breath.
Back in the class room everyone watched as someone started to climb over the edge of the roof, and down the spouting.
"Is that Shinji?" Someone asked.
"It looks like........ Is he going to jump?" another student asked.
Toji and Kensuke just watched. "Man, what the hell is Shinji thinking?"
After climbing down the rain spouting, Shinji was able to crawl in through an open window. And started to run to the main floor of the school.
"Man, something's not right with them. I need to get to NERV." Shinji thought to him self.
T.B.C.
Well what you think? Well if you thought that was funny just wait for the next chapter. Please, please review. I like all reviews. Good and bad.