Surprise

By She's a Star

Disclaimer: Buffy belongs to Joss.

Author's Note: This takes place after 'Crush' in season five.

*

First of all, it's sick. Purely, majorly sick. Not to mention twisted. But then again, that's kind of the essence of Spike, so maybe she shouldn't be surprised.

. . . Oh, whatever. She should be surprised. And she is. Not 'jump out from behind the couch and yell "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"' surprised, either. No, more like 'the Master will rise tonight and you will die' surprised.

Only with a higher ick factor.

Spike in love with her. Right. Just because he's all docile and harmless now doesn't mean that she'll just fall into his arms. She is not about to date a formerly homicidal maniac just because he gets all lurky in the shadows and feeds her some line about not being able to stop. Please. Like she'd do that.

. . . Again, anyway.

Angel is different. He has a soul, for one. Plus, his hair does that cute stick-up-y thing instead of looking like the coiffure of the Billy Idol impersonator from hell. And Angel . . . okay, she's not going to pursue that particular line of thought, because that's ancient history. In having been two years ago. Which was a long time! And . . . where was she again?

Oh yeah. Spike. Being in love with her.

. . . Aaand back to Angel.

Ugh. But now she's stuck on Spike. Spike. It's beyond icky, and wrong, and psychologically demented. It's chilling. It makes her skin crawl. He's a psycho - who's to say he's not going to display his affection by chaining her to the wall of his crypt and beating the hell out of his exes in front of her?

Oh, wait. He did that already.

Nothing good can come of this, she decides.

But maybe he'll just get over it. He has to. After all, there's no way in hell that anything's going to happen between them.

Please.

She'd rather die.