Disclaimer: Sure, I own Kingdom Hearts. Final Fantasy, too. I am a huge success. Ha. (AGH don't sue me, Squeenix, it was a joke!)
Rating: R; Shounen-ai (will become yaoi), language, future situations, AU, probable OOC-ness.
Main Pairings: Sephiroth x Cloud, Aerith x Cloud (triangle); eventual Riku x Sora
Notes: …a romantic comedy?! I'm writing a ROMANTIC COMEDY?! What's wrong with me?! Yeah, a little surprised at myself for that, especially the Cloud x Aerith thing. Never thought I'd do that, either. Tee hee… but I got glomped by a plot bunny, and I think it broke a few ribs. Ouch.

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Prologue
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…it was time. Everything was perfect - the setting, the mood, hell, even the lighting was suitable for romance. Cloud didn't mind the fact that they were in a restaurant, either. In fact, it heightened his desire for it to happen. Let the people watch if they wanted to. Let them all see him claim the one he loved, forever.

He looked into the deep, forest green eyes across from him and smiled. They were so full of love for him - and only him, he knew it. This would not be a mistake. True, they were both kind of young, but… he wanted this. He knew she would want it, too.

It wasn't as if they were dating for just a little while, either… he devoted a little over a year of his life to his love, and knew the first time he laid eyes on her that she was, as cliché as it was, 'the one'. And he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her… she would be his wife and the mother of his children, living in a cozy house in Traverse Town, yard surrounded by a white picket fence… and they would have a pet dog. Or maybe a duck.

Cloud had a strange love for ducks… not in the perverted sense, but he did like them enough to own one.

…of course, getting married meant no more dating other people - and no more looking, either, when she was around. He didn't really mind the dating fact much, as she was the only one he ever truly went out with… Cloud was one of those types who were fond of gazing and longing, but too shy to do anything about it; luckily, Aerith wasn't. In fact, she was rather bold, asking him on a date the same day they met in one of Traverse Town's public libraries.

She was there looking for a book about flowers. He was there just to kill time before work, flipping through - for some reason - a book that she wanted.

The two just… clicked. He truly loved her, and she loved him.

…so why couldn't he shake that damn foreboding feeling? It wouldn't be a mistake to ask for her hand, as he was positive she would accept him…

…maybe…

…she wouldn't refuse, would she? No, she wouldn't… he hoped. Cloud bit his knuckle; the small box sitting in his pocket suddenly felt all too heavy, reminding him it was there and waiting. He bit harder and was only a little surprised to find his hands shaking. Damn jitters.

Damn ring.

Damn question…!

"Hey, are you okay?"

He jumped. Aerith was looking back at him through the candlelight, frowning with concern, a hand he hadn't noticed touching his forearm. Cloud focused all of his attention on her, drowning out the soft murmurs of conversing restaurant-goers and the violins in the background.

Looking up into those beautiful eyes, Cloud smiled and nodded, taking the girl's hand in both of his own. "Yeah. I'm with you, aren't I?"

She gave him one of her usual, brilliant smiles and laughed softly. He always seemed to have a way to brighten her already cheerful mood with a few kind words, he noticed, and often used that to his advantage. "Cloud…"

The blonde began to fidget. He was going to do it now… now.

Cloud gulped.

Now?!

What if she said no?!

In front of all those people!!

What the hell could he do if she said no, bury his head into his mashed potatoes?!

With his eyes widened slightly, Cloud looked down at the mound of white on his plate and considered the possibility. Upon brief observation - as well as a bit of stirring with his fork - he concluded that the potatoes were a bit too shallow to provide true protection from his impending humiliation… but maybe if he was lucky, he could inhale some of them through his nose and choke to death…

"More wine, Madame?"

Thank the gods for distractions.

Aerith looked up at the waiter, a tall, stately gentleman with short red hair and a scar running down his cheek. He tapped the side of a bottle filled with red wine and grinned politely. "Well…" After a short moment of thought, she shrugged, still smiling. "I guess another glass couldn't hurt."

Cloud watched the burgundy liquid pour into Aerith's glass a little too closely. …it looked like blood. The wine was disturbing him more than his mashed potatoes of doom.

He jumped again when Aerith kicked him under the table and found the waiter staring at him. Cloud's blue eyes were large and vapid as he tried to recall exactly why he was being watched so intently, but his brain blanked the second he was jolted from his gaze on the wine.

"…um…"

The waiter cleared his throat before pasting an obviously forced smile onto his face, and Cloud couldn't help but wonder if all waiters hated their job as much as this one did… "Wine, Monsieur." He accented the word with a slight swish of the polished green bottle. "Would you like more wine?"

Cloud blinked.

"…I think he's had enough already, thank you," Aerith answered for him, still frowning. "…are you sure you're alright, Cloud?" she asked as the waiter took his leave, her head tilted just slightly in concern. "Because you seem a little… out of it."

The blonde's eyes targeted his potatoes again, poking them warily. It would be nice if he could just put his own worries aside for a minute and ask her, but for the moment his food was more interesting. He knew it was stupid to keep procrastinating the way he was, since the fear that she would refuse was most likely unjustified…

Dammit, if only he wasn't so neurotic…

"You're awfully quiet, too… this isn't like you, Cloud…"

"I'm fine…"

Aerith made a small noise and shrugged, picking daintily at the remains of her meal. Chocobo steak. Cloud never figured the girl would eat Chocobo - or any meat, for that matter - but she indulged in it often. Just another one of the things they had in common…

"Aerith-will-you-marry-me?"

…that was sudden. So sudden, in fact, that Cloud blinked to himself and wondered if he drank more wine than he originally thought.

The girl's eyes widened impossibly. Even though Cloud blurted it out quickly - with his words all strung together into one jumbled mass - , the message was perfectly clear. She understood what he had said, but… she had to be sure. "…pardon?"

Cloud took a deep breath to steady himself and stood, procuring a small, black velvet box from his pocket. He got down on one knee in front of her and opened it.

There it was - the point of no return.

"Aerith… I love you. I… um… want to be with you… forever…" He swallowed hard to clear the tight, dry feeling from his throat. "…will you… um… be my wife?"

"Oh, Cloud…" she breathed, one hand over her rapidly beating heart. The small diamond ring sparkled innocently at her from its home in the box, blissfully unaware of the significance it held. Aerith nodded briskly, tears of joy pricking at her eyes, and smiled. "Oh, yes… yes, of course, yes!"

When the restaurant patrons within earshot started clapping, Cloud's eyes rolled into the back of his head.

He fainted.

Well… that went great.

+~----------~+

With the sun shining and clear blue skies almost ten months out of the entire year, life on Destiny Islands was very close to a dream come true… even if it was a major resort area.

Not that the inhabitants really minded all the tourists; at peak season, they generated revenue like crazy, selling them trinkets in the shape of the legendary Paopu fruit and necklaces made of Thalassa shells - most of which were actually made by their own children and sold to stores, albeit for half the price the owners sold them for. But, it gave the kids something to do for munny - other than chores, of course.

The weather was never too hot and never too cold, making it perfect beach weather all the time. The Islands had the most beautiful beaches with its clear, blue-green ocean and light, powder-soft sand, making it all the more appealing to visitors. Tall coconut trees added to the already gorgeous skyline, surrounded by shorter palms and lush greenery of all types.

Beachside cottages littered the shore, all clean and immaculate and painted in light colors, the structures only adding to the beauty of Destiny. While there were several garish motels around, most of the out-of-towners opted to rent the cottages around the streets for the sake of privacy. Some of them even had their own private sections of the beach. Those, of course, were snatched up first - for one hell of a hefty price - but it was worth it.

It was as if everything added to the charm of the Islands, the scent of flowers mingling perfectly with the salty sea air as the sound of waves crashed into the shore, accented by the call of seagulls searching for a meal or music from the boardwalk; all of it creating the picture-perfect atmosphere for a relaxing, stress-free paradise.

…if only there weren't so many damn kids around.

Okay, maybe it wasn't the kids who were the problem… it was Riku, who just-so-happened to be friends with every 13 to 15-year old in the neighborhood. Sephiroth didn't mind that his brother was popular around their section of the island, but he did mind the fact that Riku insisted on bringing all of them home for lunch every day of summer.

He really hated playing the part of Riku's kitchen wench all the time.

"So, are they done yet?"

"For the tenth time, no," Sephiroth growled, slapping together what felt like sandwich number 87 of the day. Bologna here, peanut butter and jelly there, and always, always with the tuna. He hated tuna - it was a good day when he didn't splash himself while draining the can and end up smelling like fish the rest of the afternoon. "And if you would help, Riku, these would be finished much sooner."

The teenager shrugged and slid off the black marble countertop, slapping Sephiroth good-naturedly on the arm. "I would, but they're so much better when you make them, Sephy," he said, voice sickeningly sweet - and utterly fake.

"Don't call me that," the man warned, sorely tempted to fling a slice of turkey at one certain, smirking Riku - who knew he was treading on thin ice, but teased him anyway. "Honestly… you're fifteen, you should be doing these things on your own at this age."

"…I know, I know…"

"Do you?" Sephiroth turned to face him, holding out a mayonnaise-smeared butter knife, "because I believe if you did, you would help."

Riku rolled his aquamarine eyes and reluctantly took the silver utensil as Sephiroth opened a nearby drawer to snag a new one. There weren't really too many more sandwiches to make, but Sephiroth almost always forced him to do it, regardless.

Not that he really minded… he only ended up making one sandwich half the time anyway.

"…where's Sora's?"

"Saved it for you, as usual," Sephiroth murmured, absently throwing together one last peanut butter and jelly. For some reason, both of Riku's girl friends preferred those over anything else. "And I only made one for Wakka today."

But apparently Riku wasn't listening, intent on making 'the perfect sandwich' - or so Sora dubbed it - for his best friend. Sephiroth, personally, was disgusted by the thing - there was far too much of everything on it. For Sora's small size, he had one healthy - or was it considered unhealthy? - appetite, eating more than even Sephiroth himself.

Sephiroth liked Sora, though… not that he really had a choice in the matter. He and Riku were practically attached at the hip since they were children. But Sora was a good kid… a little hyperactive sometimes, but he never caused trouble - Riku was usually the one to do that, being the more adventurous of the two.

Finished making food for their guests, Sephiroth leaned his back against the counter and folded his arms over his chest, watching his brother continue making an abomination between two slices of bread. "It's amazing he can stomach that…" The observation had been said before, but Sephiroth always felt the need to say it anyway.

Riku chuckled and blew his bangs from his eyes. "I know, isn't it? But he loves it like this, so…" he trailed off with a shrug.

Dropping one last slice of cheese on what had to be a pound of every kind of meat in their fridge, Riku made a sound of accomplishment and wiped his hands on his oversized pants. "Voila - the 'piece de resistance'," he announced, gesturing grandly at the monstrosity.

"Too much for me, I think."

"Yeah. It's gross just making it…" Riku paused, staring at the sandwich pensively before pointing out, "…it's got a lot of…," he snorted, rolling his hand on his wrist. "…meat."

Sephiroth grinned. "So it does."

He straightened and then stretched, pulling his long hair from the ponytail he kept it in while preparing meals… even though tying his hair back didn't stop Riku and his friends from yelping about finding 4-foot-something long strands of silver in their food - which they didn't.

Well… usually not. Yes, he was careful, but the hair itself was clever that way.

"Will you all be eating inside or outside today?"

Riku clicked his tongue, considering his options. "Probably outside. Last time I checked, Tidus and Wakka were in a pretty heated one-on-one, so you probably don't want them in the house."

Sephiroth nodded, grateful that Riku was so mindful of his - slightly annoying - affinity for cleanliness. Besides, sand got into everything, and he hated to bring out the broom so soon after he last swept. Plus, he knew Riku wouldn't clean up after the two Blitzballers without a fight , so the teen was really only suggesting it for his own good anyway. "Fair enough. On the porch or patio?"

"Mm… porch."

"Side or back?"

"Back."

Sephiroth nodded, opening a cabinet door and taking out a large serving platter in one smooth move. As he piled the lunches onto it, he wondered if he should start charging for all the food the kids have eaten so far over their break.

"Tell Wakka 'no balls on the table', and I mean it this time," Sephiroth said firmly, dropping the last sandwich onto the plate.

"…that's not what you said to Leon the last time he was here," Riku smirked, putting the used condiments away. Sephiroth stiffened.

Always, always, Riku had to bring up Leon. Sephiroth didn't know if the boy was masochistic or what.

"Have you been spying on me?" he asked, the pitch of his voice rising into the danger zone. "Because if you have, I will—"

"Gods, Seph, it was a joke," the teen muttered, "lighten up."

He was answered with a monosyllabic grunt.

When Riku was done setting things back in their rightful place, he goggled and froze, one hand hovering over the handle of the fridge. "…wait…" The boy turned slowly, one eyebrow raised, and stared at Sephiroth's back. "…does that mean you guys've had sex on the table?" He blinked at the prolonged silence which followed. "…please tell me I heard you wrong… I've eaten on that table recently…"

Sephiroth was fighting to hold back a smirk. The good thing about Riku bringing up Leon was Sephiroth getting his revenge - mainly, by grossing the boy out. So, the boy would be a little scarred mentally. It built character.

"Well …it rained in the past week, hasn't it?" he deadpanned, shrugging nonchalantly.

Riku blinked again.

"Though I suppose if you're worried, you could always hose it down to be safe."

The teenager grimaced.

"It should be alright, after all Leon insists that we use—"

"Agh!" Riku threw his hands in the air and grabbed the lunch platter, "I was only joking and here you are, going on about your sex life! I don't need to know these things!"

Sephiroth smirked, resting his elbows on the counter island to watch his brother walk away as fast as he could without dropping everyone's lunches on the floor. "If you'd like, I can get you a dishrag…"

"Ugh, just shut up!"

"A tablecloth?"

"Stop!!" Riku stalked out of the house, slamming the sliding glass door behind him.

Sephiroth smirked again, pushing his hair back over his shoulder, and sighed. Brothers were so fun to tease sometimes. Sephiroth could definitely see why Riku liked to push his buttons once in a while. And while Sephiroth himself didn't bother Riku too often - to the teen's thanks - he really got a kick when he was truly in the mood to play around.

Though he loved Riku, sometimes Sephiroth regretted the fact that he was the one who had to take care of him. Riku's mother - Sephiroth's stepmother - died several years before then, when the boy was four; their father left the Riku in Sephiroth's charge when he turned 18, so he could go off to continue his studies in a research facility halfway across the world… and children weren't allowed on the immediate premises.

But Sephiroth was responsible at that age, somehow managing to care for a 6-year old as well as himself on Destiny Islands. Their father left them both extremely well off also, being a major success in his particular field of study - what that was, of course, was supposedly 'top secret' - and paid what should be an illegal sum of munny every month for child support…

Sephiroth never had - and would never have - to work a day in his life.

Being Riku's legal guardian had thrown him a few bumps in the road, however. He never had the chance to go to college, which he would have liked to, but they had no other family members who could have taken Riku in; Sephiroth's stepsister took up residence in Traverse Town's all-female school - Ansem was very strict about keeping his children, both by birth and by marriage, in only the highest-rated, gender-segregated private facilities, and Destiny Islands' school for girls didn't measure up - and there was no way in hell Sephiroth was going to allow Riku to be put in foster care when he didn't have to be.

Taking care of Riku never really put a dent in Sephiroth's social life, surprisingly. Some people looked down on him, thinking he was the father of a young boy when he was so young himself, but then again, he didn't care. The opinions of others didn't really matter to him; besides, most of the residents of Destiny Islands knew who he was, anyway. Who cared if a few tourists thought wrongly about him?

After cleaning up the rest of the kitchen, Sephiroth checked on the gaggle of teenagers eating on the beach. Riku and Kairi flanked Sora's sides, both of them tickling the boy mercilessly as his other friends laughed, looking on.

…kids would be kids.

+~----------~+

A/N: Short prologue. *sighs*

I'm not sure how long this story will be, nor where I'm exactly going with it… and yes, I should be working on my unfinished fics, but this needed to be started. The idea's been floating around my head for a while now, and I can never resist writing something with Seph x Cloud *coughsexcough*. They demand it! And a sexually confused Cloud is my favorite kind of Cloud…

And new fics always help ease away writer's block when ficlets just aren't working out… mmyep. I can't seem to latch onto the concept of a short fic. It's hard for me ;_;

Yes, Sephiroth is dating Leon. FOR NOW. Dun dun DUN! Will there be a lime-y scene with them? …maybe. There also may be lime with Cloud and Aerith… but as for lemon? Seph and Cloud, yes. YES. And possibly one with Riku and Sora. We'll see. I must do plot and character development first. (*and a collective sigh is heard around FF.net*)