Past Fears Chapter 6, a sailor moon fanfic

Sorry it took so long … I haven't been in the author mood. Been a bit hard.

Disclaimer: Sailor Moon does not belong to me.

Past Fears

Chapter 6

It's been a week since that monster appeared. It's been a week since they saw Serena. It's been a week since they've found out the truth. It's certainly been a long and agonizing week for the girls to keep all their questions inside! Serena has not gone to school, to the meetings, to the arcade, to see Darien, and to do anything else! The girls are just frustrated of all the events that have happened – they want their questions answered yet their leader isn't here to give them any answers.

Well, the girls could just go find Serena – obviously, it wasn't going to be very hard. Serena didn't bother to cover up her trail but the girls didn't know how to face their leader anymore. All this time, they all thought that Serena and Darien were meant to be – past, present, and future. Now, all of a sudden, everything got thrown out of proportion. Okay, Serena is in love with someone else. No, not just "someone else" – she was in love with the enemy! Correction, she is in love with the enemy. How could this have happened? Why has it happened? What will happen to Crystal Tokyo?

Sigh.

"Would you girls stop sighing? You're making me uneasy," said a certain blond haired man behind the counter.

"Oh sorry Andrew, it's just…" started Mina.

"Nothing," finished Darien. Darien had just come into the Crown Arcade, quick enough to finish Mina's uneasy statement. "Nothing's wrong. The girls are just having a bad day." Andrew looked at Darien with a look that says, 'I don't believe you one bit at all but I'm not going to ask.'

"Hey Darien," said Rei.

"Hey girls. How's it going?" asked Darien.

"Nothing."

"I see," responded Darien.

"How can you be so calm about the situation?!" shouted Rei.

"Being calm doesn't mean it isn't painful," responded Darien. Once again, things got quiet as Rei stared at Darien. Several seconds later, Rei looked away from Darien and she started to walk out of the Arcade.

---

Meanwhile, Serena was at home, packing her belongings in two suitcases while humming one of her favorite songs. She had already planned to move to America with Jadeite. Everything has been planned and set. Serena even registered to one of the High Schools in America so she can study. Her English may not be very good but she will try her hardest.

As for Sailor Moon…

Serena decided it was best for her to resign leader position. There is no longer a point why she must fight and plus, she's too clumsy to be the Princess or the leader of the Sailor Scouts. She'll hand over her duties and powers over to Venus – the rightful leader of the Sailor Scouts. Yes, that's what she'll do.

Knock.

She whirled around on her heels to see who was knocking on her door. It was her mother. Serena smiled at her mother warmly as she turned and continued to pack.

"Are you sure you want to go Serena? America is pretty far away …" started her mother. Pretty was an understatement.

"Yes, Mama. I want to expand my opportunities. There are too many distractions in Japan for me … and if I moved away, it might help. America is a great place, Mama. Their economy is stable and they have many opportunities for people like me."

"But why now, Serena? You haven't wanted to do this before … does this have anything to do with Darien?" Concern was written all over her mother's face. Serena was acting out of the normal. Serena was being a little too grown up from normal. Serena was actually thinking about something that didn't involve food – which is not normal.

"No, Mama. This has nothing to do with Darien," replied Serena. She faced her mother when she said that. And despite all else, her eyes hold no trance of lying – no trance of deceit. Her mother let out a sigh and a soft smile.

Serena Tsukino was finally growing up and it pained her mother to realize it. However, her mother was swelling up with pride.

"Then be safe, Serena. You either call or write back occasionally and let us know how you're doing. And be sure you got everything ready and organized."

"I will, Mama. Don't worry. I'm a big girl! I won't make you worry about me anymore…"

Her mother smiled at her once more before walking down the hall and away from Serena's room.

I hope I won't. No, I know I won't.

Within two hours, Serena had everything packed and ready. She had her passport, school documents, birth certificate, immigration papers, and everything you can think of that she needed. She put all the important papers into a big brown envelope and left it on her table. She'll be able to grab it right away when she left tomorrow morning.

The packing is done. There was just one thing to do.

Yes, her flight to America is tomorrow morning. Yes, she has yet to inform the scouts of her departure. Rather, discuss it with them. She was just glad that Luna was with Mina for the past week or she'd never hear the end of it.

Duties, destiny, fate … they were all a bunch of bull. She wasn't going to follow through with her destiny or what fate decided to pull her through. She had responsibilities – so what? She's been having responsibilities of saving the world since she was a mere 14-year-old. Other 14-year-olds were just worried about passing exams and hanging out with friends during the weekends. But no, not Serena – she was worried about some creepy, disgusting looking monster killing people in the same god damn park night after night.

Talk about a colorful life.

She took a glance at her communicator that was currently sitting on top of her nightstand, looking oh-so-lonely. Her mouth was set on a grim line as she slowly walked towards her nightstand, her eyes never leaving her communicator.

"You should probably tell them, love."

"I know, Jadeite and how did you get in here?" replied Serena.

"Why the hesitation? And … what do you mean 'how'?"

"Never mind my question. Plus, can't I just leave then mail them my transformation broach? Obviously, that is so much easier," said Serena as she glared at her communicator.

"Oh yes, I'm pretty sure that's the best idea on the face of this planet," replied Jadeite, sarcasm dripping from his mouth.

"I don't want to tell them. They'll blow a fuse."

"As they should. You are the princess after all."

"I don't want to be the damned princess or the damned queen."

"Do they know?"

"Obviously not."

"I'll be here…"

"I know…"

"Then drop the hesitation and do what you have to do."

Serena closed her eyes briefly while taking in a long breath and exhaling it shortly afterwards. Here goes nothing, she thought. I mean the least they'll do is blow a fuse, scream, yell, and decree that it is irresponsible of me to follow my own desires. What more can they do? Stop me? Not bloody likely.

She picked up the communicator and reluctantly pressed a button. This button immediately calls all of the Sailor Scouts. One by one, the four inner scouts appeared on her tiny communicator screen.

Silence.

No one knew what to say.

No one.

Then Luna's head popped up on Mina's screen.

"Is there something wrong, Serena?" she asked.

Serena looked ahead blankly as she contemplated. She didn't come out of her own thoughts until Jadeite tapped her on her shoulders. Well, it's time.

"I have something to tell everyone. We'll meet at the temple in 20 minutes." Without waiting for any replies, she merely turned her communicator off.

"Well, that was a bit rude. What if they were busy?" asked Jadeite.

"Oh come off of it. As if they really have anything to do but to fight monsters."

"You're still one of them."

"Not for long."

---

Everyone stood in silence – an uncomfortable silence as they await their leader to arrive. They all had arrived, including Darien, a bit early. They were all standing in front of the temple, thinking to themselves. Tick tock tick tock tick tock…

Then there were footsteps. But there was more than one person. Then their heads came into view. Serena's head and Jadeite's head. And before they knew it, Serena and Jadeite were standing in front of them.

Serena's face didn't hold a smile, nor did she even bother with a greeting. Jadeite, on the other hand, had a smile on his face, greeting whomever that even bothered to look at him. As the second passed, Jadeite swooped down to give Serena a kiss on the cheek, followed by some whispers.

"You tell them what you need to tell them. I'll be waiting for you at the bottom of the temple steps." And he was gone.

Darien saw it all – his hands were clenched into fists, desperately resisting the urge to strangle Jadeite on the spot. How dare that guy? How dare him? HOW DARE HIM?!

Serena, however, was unfazed even though she saw Darien's nonverbal signals. Then they looked at each other in the eyes – she saw everything. She saw his soul, the feelings that coursed through his body, and … love. She turned away immediately when she saw the love in his eyes. The love that he had for her…has for her.

The Sailor Scouts … well, let's just say that it's still taking a while for them to digest the information. They still couldn't believe that Serena loved Jadeite. They still couldn't believe that Serena lied to them. No, they couldn't believe that Serena was capable of lying – and damn good at it too.

"I have something to tell everyone," started Serena – standing there, letting the breeze rush past her body, calming her soul…

"I'm going to America tomorrow."

Most, no, all of the Sailor Scouts, including the cats and Darien were in shock. Their eyes widen and their stances slacked.

"You're not serious right, Serena?" asked Rei.

"You must be going to America for vacation! How come you never told us?" asked Mina, laughing nervously, desperately hoping that it's not what she thinks it is.

"No, I'm going to America long term," replied Serena.

Silence … yet again. Until…

"You can't do this!" shouted Rei. Serena looked at her with a bored expression.

"And why not, Mars?" asked Serena, purposely stressing the Sailor Scout's title – daring them to challenge her.

"You are the leader of the Sailor Scouts, Serena! You are the Princess and future Queen. You cannot abandon your duties!" shouted Luna.

"Venus is the rightful leader of the Sailor Scouts – in the past and in the future," replied Serena.

"Serena, you are the rightful leader regardless of the past or the future," replied Mina.

"You're wrong, Venus. I am the Princess – I am not suited for battle. It was the Scouts' job to protect me. How I became a fighter in this century…I do not know but I am not a warrior. I was never meant to be a warrior," replied Serena.

"So you're being a coward," Rei spat at Serena with venom in her voice.

"Careful of whom you call a coward, Mars. However, I am only what you want to see me as and nothing more. I've been your little puppet, letting you all string me along with this little storyboard but I'm done. I'm through, and I want out. I'm tired of fate and destiny; I'm tired of my so-called responsibilities. I'm tired of following a path that I did not choose and most of all, I'm tired of pretending like I enjoy and love every moment of this wretched life of mine!"

Silence. Serena's outburst was unexpected. None of them really had an idea of how she was feeling. None of them knew how much pain she was going through. None of them…

Amy and Lita had been awfully quiet through this whole verbal argument. They did plan to say something but after Serena's previous statements, they felt so little.

"If you are happy with your choice then I support you, Serena," whispered Amy. Her voice was so small … it almost went unnoticed. But, no, you see, everyone heard. Everyone. Serena's eyes widen just a bit.

"I agree with Amy. If you truly do not desire your life as a warrior, then choose the life you want to lead," said Lita.

"Lita! Amy! You can't be serious about this!" shouted Rei.

"Thank you, you two," replied Serena – a smile finally appearing on her beautiful face.

"You can't leave your responsibilities like this, Serena! It's unheard of!" shouted Luna.

"What … what about us?" Silence, yet again. Darien had spoken. His head was tilted slightly towards the ground so his bangs covered his eyes from view. Serena looked at him with a hint of guilt.

"I'm sorry, Darien. There was never an 'us' … and I don't think there ever will be. I never loved you. Yes, in the past, Serenity did love Endymion but that was Serenity. I, Serena Tsukino, never held an ounce of feeling for you but because of my duty and responsibility as princess and future queen, I followed my path without question."

"Did I really mean nothing to you?!" Darien looked up – his eyes full of sorrow and despair. He desperately wanted Serena to tell him that this was all a lie…all a dream. He desperately wanted to hold her and tell her that he never wanted her to leave him. He desperately wanted…her.

He just couldn't help himself. He ran towards her, enveloping her in a hug. His face was buried in the crook of her neck, taking in her scent, and willing himself to calm down. His emotions wrapped around him tightly … he didn't want to let her go … didn't want to lose her.

Serena didn't say anything, didn't do anything. She didn't return his hug, didn't cry, didn't speak …

"It'd be nice if you could remove yourself from my fiancée."

The four inner scouts turned their heads towards the voice. It was Jadeite – he was casually leaning against a tree trunk, his eyes flickering with anger. Of course, he didn't do anything … he just leaned there casually. He had run up the steps when he heard Darien shout … Jadeite had been worried. But when he reached the top, he found the scene in front of him a bit too much. Honestly, can't the man compose himself? At least Serena wasn't responding…

"I'm not going to let her go, Jadeite. Not with you," whispered Darien. Jadeite only raised a single eyebrow at him.

"And what exactly are you going to do?"

"Kill you."

----

Sorry if there are any grammatical/spelling errors. I wrote this as soon as I got some inspiration and I didn't want to let it go. So if there is any, I apologize. Hopefully the next chapter wouldn't take … that long. Good day.