AN:
I'm so sorry I've been so dormant for the past few months, I was seriously lacking inspiration. :::Points to Muse, where she is scotch taped to the inside of the microwave::: I guess you could say this is a good thing, considering I'm inspired by terrible fanfiction. And I just hope that maybe, in some small way, my scathing, frothing parody is helping make the RK fandom a better place. I can dream, can't I?
I also want to add, (thanks to some people for reminding me) that just because you may do some of the things I complain about here… (cough cough I know I do cough cough) well, that doesn't make you a bad author. Everybody goes through stages and phases in their fanfiction careers, everybody makes mistakes, everybody grows and develops. It's okay, that doesn't mean you suck, I promise. As long as you put in effort, and are always looking for ways to improve the way you write and to expand your knowledge, that's what counts. And spell checking. Because really, there's no excuse.
Anyway. Onward with the next subject, which was really a bit half-baked, but I felt, for better or worse, I should squeeze out another chapter, as promised.
Your Archetypical Sappy Songfic
Okay, guys, I know what you're thinking. What's wrong with songfics? Absolutely nothing, I like 'em a lot of the time. But recently I've been reading some real crap out there. You know: people just paste their favorite song's lyrics into a disjointed one-shot and claim it's art. I see it all the time, and I figured it's time I spoke out. (Thanks to Angrybee for suggesting it)
Here it is folks, pull out your barf bags, because this will be one nauseating ride.
Reminder for the terminally stupid: THIS IS A PARODY!!!!
SongFIcs GALOR
By Perfect Chibi Angel Elisa
A/N: Lyk, ok.- Here's my first time tryin out SONGficcies, but I totally wanted to do something because I LUV THIS SONG AND I LUV KENCHIN!!! -x Btw, avril lavign rules, blink182 rules, hilary duff rules, and beatles sucks!
Early mornin' she waykes up
eliza opens her eyez and blinks in the sunlite beaming down on her beutiful face.
Nok nok nok on her door
sum1 pounds on the door. hurry, stoopid!' its her hitokeery trainer. She was realy good at it.
iz time for makup. purfect smile I'ts you their all watin 4
her purfect face becums even more sparkling when she applyes her light makup, just mascara, eyeliner, foundation, and eyeshadow
its you their all waiting for they go isn't she lovely that hollywood gurl
eliza is singing and dansing for and odiense they thru monies and flours at her
but she cry cry crys in her lonly hart thinkin
if theres nothing, mising in my life then why do these tears cum nite?
crieng in her bed and she was so sad and bautiful and the moon was cring wit her. Her life was sooo bad, becuz people abused her!
If u wanna b my luver, u gotta get wit my friends! Make it last fereva, frendship never ends!
Eliza n' misoa and megami r all walkin together to the market and they all look beutiful, even tho wit her blond, anklelength hair and shinning blu eyez that were lyke the ocean and the sky put together, and her perfect, flawless skin with only a few freckles, eliza was the most beutiful.
If u wanna b my lover, u gotta get wit my friends!
Just then oashi, sojiro, Kenshin, and sano walk up. Misoa and Megumi went to Aoshi and sano, and sojiro and Kenshin drooled at eliza.even tho Aoshi and sano thought that she wuz prettier, they liked there girls. Then the cuples walked of together, kissin'.
The END!!!
epilog
eliza wached the rain drops run down teh window, as tearz ran down her beautiful checks.
Need I say more? Song fics can be really, really good, or really really not. (more often than not, sadly, it's the latter) Nothing's worse than seeing your favorite characters angst and mope in very clichéd ways to some badly written punk-rock-pop wannabe song. I shudder at the thought.
Please, I beg of you. When writing songfics, MAKE IT ORIGINAL. It's the only way they're any good, I swear to you. Other than that, I have no guidelines, because songfics range so widely.
Much love always,
your condescending, snarky Bitch-Critic
Note:
I would like to make an additional disclaimer right now: Think of this series as more of a what NOT to do than a what TO do, because no one can tell you how to write. Everything in the world is subjective. These here are my opinions, not absolute truths.
There is only one absolute truth:
Soujiro Seta no Tenken is a sexy beast.
ESP